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MAR 29 IBti
THE LANCE
A Weekly Journal of News and Events At St, Andrews Presbyterian College
VOLUME 16
LAURINBURG, NORTH CAROLINA
A
1
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m
It was kind of a normal day. ^
Reports
■ The day started like any
other Thursday morning at St.
Andrews, only today was to be
the day of surprises and big
^events. Sitting at the back
‘table enjoying the usual runny
eggs and see-through bacon I
suddenly regretted that last
beer from the night before.
This too was a sign of things to
come. After breakfast I retur
ned to my room and started to
make preparations for the
coming event. Four tape
recorders, a tape player, a
Marantz amp, one Lyric
model four speaker and 5
cassettes, were all that I
I of the production. Maskin
I Tape, damn it I forgot to get
: iany tape. Now where am I
^ ; going to find a roll of Maskin
; itape at 10:00 on a Thursday
‘ j morning. The Bookstore, and I
jean charge it to SAS; great
i problem solved. The
j Bookstore doesn’t open till 12!
Ill beg Mrs. Patton.
“Mrs. Patton, Mrs. Patton .
1. . can you let me in for a
second?”
I “What’s the problem?
I We’re closed now, come back
jlatar.”
Now picture this: I’m on my
j knees begging.
‘Please it’s an emergency.
I’ll flunk out of school if you
don’t let me in.”
‘Okey, Okey don’t get ex
cited; cash or charge.”
“Charge.”
Major crisis number one
now solved I proceeded to the
cafeteria with the tape. With
the tape player and amp
hooked up I then proceeded to
hook up the additional weaker
outside. Now let’s see that’s
about 30 feet and I have,
literally speaking,, about 10
feet of wire. Som^ow I don’t
think that will work. Ah, I’ll
rip some off from WSAP and
they’ll be none the wiser.
Forget that last option. I
don’t know anyone with keys
to the station. So what to do...
That’s it! I’ll beg girls in
Wilmington Dorm for the use
of their wire.
“Do you think I could
borrow about 20 feet of
CIt was kind of a normal day.^
speaker wire from you for
about 3 hours?”
“Are you crazy, I can’t get
through the morning without
Bob Dylan”
Try someone else I suppose.
“Hey, pretty woman how’s
it going; Remember those
happy days of 401...
Yea they were a lot of fun.
By the way do you think I
could borrow some speaker
wire from you for a proje . . .
You mean I can, really, I
mean thanks a lot.”
Second major crisis solved.
Now to explain the whole
crazy thing to the powers that
be in the cafeteria. Who could
possibly mind a little in-
teruption in thejusually dull
day at the S.A. Jafeteria. A
Banquet, oh, now that does
pose an interesting problem.
Run the speaker about 10 feet
further up and everything’s
fine. Fine my foot I don’t have
any more speaker wire.
“Hey, remember me. Yea
SAS 401, well I was wondering
if you wouldn’t mind, could I
borrow some more of that
wire?”
The speaker is now out of
the way and we’re set for the
event. Nothing else could
possibly go wrong. Now I have
my people set up for recording
the event. There’s Andy, Joni,
Nancy and ah ... I need
another person I’ve got to
have another person. Where
I am I going to find another
person at 11:30. This problem
I can’t solve so to heck with
it. I’ll only use three cas
settes.
The event went off okey and
no other problems were en
countered until I listened back
to one of the recordings.
Somehow in all the rush I
forgot to put batteries in one of
the recorders.
DON MACKENZIE
An ape covered with paint
and powder.
Eternity was in that
moment. ji^gt really ...
Not really?
Joy, when intense, leads to
various purposeless
movements—to dancing about,
pneumo^astric nerve on the
swallowing a tailor’s news,
the eyballs moved easily in
any direction.
Prepairng for Spontaneity
After hours of empty talk an
idea appeared. It exploded
and snowballed as it grew with
milUons of possibilities . . .
discarding some and building
on others. Then the countdown
began and suddenly ended,
only to be part of the past. We
did it!
It is strange that after plan
ning IT for three weeks we do
not know what happened. We
missed it. We did not have
time to see. Just fifteen hours
before the event I bounced
around on the ladder, feeling
silly and awkard. Then Name
discovered the woman’s
dressing room. But as they
stood with only their white
faces on, a car rounded the
comer and drove right in, to
the dressingroom the walled
in tree and their backs were
up against a wall. Trying to
explain.
All morning it was in the air.
Electricity. Instant
descissons. We had our hands
on the controls, great ex
pectations for It, being in
charge for we knew something
was going to happen at a cer
tain place at a certain time,
for certain. However, as we
were getting dressed there
was a tinge of uncertainity -
Would the cop show up, who is
going to put up the ladder,
what time is it? Ah, s— the
door is locked, can we squeeze
out the win
dow???????????????? After
all that thought the definite
dates to tango were made
waiting in line the last thrity
seconds of our count down. We
did not know what we were
going to do. I do not know what
we did. As someone said, “Our
hands are in Donald’s.” They
were. I was waiting then
riding in a police car due to
some time warp. I’m not sure
what happen in the time and
space in between. I vaguely
remember three or four in
cidents and I’ve heard bits and
pieces of what people did. I
noticed bystanders only twice.
(Coming down I saw blue
jeaned legs and feet, later
statues by the wall.) No one
was for real. Ail evening and
the next day things would
click and remember some
thing i did during the event...
foggy mind like the morning
after a very drunken night
when slowly you’re hit with
recollections of past time as
events of anottier day occur.
(Oh, yea, that happened.)
I can not begin to tell the order
in which anything happened.
I was not there as I usually
am.
Linda Carson
SPECIAL GUEST-
DEAN MARIA, SANTA
MARIA
Hello.
Hay.
May I interview you?
Sure.
Okay. Did you see what
happened today?
Yes, but I knew about it
beforehand. I thought it was
terrific.
I knew you knew about it.
Yeah, I thought it was lots
of fun.
Did you enjoy it?
Yeah.
Okay . . . I’ve never in-
Did you see our event?
Hunter, don’t do this to me.
I only saw part of it.
What part did you see?
The people coming down
the ladder.
Is that all?
That was all.
They wouldn’t let you up
from your table to go and see
it?
all in all it was quite an even-
tuful day (yes indeed)
The event was placed
somewhere between the salad
and the pickles on the path to
the table lost inside the coffee
cup left for film to record. It
was (quite understandably) a
well seasoned succotash with
little unidentifiable blue
things which seemed to flash
that made it all worth while.
Of course that young woman’s
legs ticked the time in milli
seconds like the clock work of
some unseeing, unfeeling,
banal creature undistrubed by
the relevance absurdity has on
our fantastical existence in
this once removed from any
real world notion stratosphere
we find ourselves breathing,
eating, sleeping, loving,
feehng, seeing, smelling and
tasting in. A bubble descends
with convex distortions and
shows us on live action full
scale cafe ole cinema-ramic
screens that what we see our
selves to be is only what we
limit ourselves to see.
terviewed anybody before so
I’m pretty nervous.
Okay. That’s alright. It was
great.
Thankyou.
I think that most people en
joyed it, rather than anyOiing
else.
Somebody came up to me
on the balcony and said, rigni
after it happened, “Excuse
my ignorance, but what was
that all about?” I couldn’t
think of anything to tell him.
I thought it was great fun.
I’hankyou.
You’re welcome.
Goodbye.
I could look at part of it.
You didn’t see the police
car?
No, but I heard the police
car.
What did you think so far?
I thought it was pretty in
teresting.
You did? That’s what my
father would say.
« « 4> » ♦
As you were sitting there
breathing over spilt time a
ladder inconspicuously
ejaculated strange figures
upon your field of peripheral
vision. Suddenly you
discovered that the multi
colored delights waiting to
give you gastronomic
hallucinations were not a part
of the under tow that pulled
you out. Unconsciously you
applauded as you saw yourself
through the window that
reflected the closed corridor
to your existence.
The event was all removed
by one out of context with your
new awareness. You were
stunned and affected but the
window offered nothing to
clarify your vision. You ate
the multi-colored masked
deUghts which imprisoned you
back into the existence you
had so vicariously left behind
for that instant inside the egg
shell before the first crack.
DON’T LET THIS HAPPEN!
It is you beyond the pane of
glass who waits to dance
across the grass.
NED'S
Beverage Outlet
Lowest Prices In
Town
An Exxon Dealer
MAIN ST.