Ke: I o Orange Man Kesiaenis uup.//J :ro.oj.i*+‘t.o/ciuus/imicc/ajuucj/i5aa^,i. November 18, ]999 GUEST EDITORIAL Re: To Orange Hall Residents It's official: Orange people are stupid. In the past, it’s been taboo to judge Orange people and their Orange music. Administrators and teachers kept making excuses for them. At long last St. Andrews has admitted the problem and is taking steps to correct it. Orange hall is a complete disgrace. Its members wallow in filth, mud and beer odor. Obscene things are scrawled on the walls and windows. The only reparations made for the damages are a few measly quarters left in the housekeeping tip cups. The residents look even worse than the floors. They get drunk, fight each other and then drag the bodies away so they won't be in the way the next time someone gets drunk and fights. Even when Orange people aren't in Orange, they cause trouble. I have seen poor homeless people collecting cans on the side of the road, only to have their shopping carts stolen from them by Orange people, cans and all. Student life has now released a study explaining why Orange is such a disgrace. Over 60% of people living in Orange are stupid. The average freshman mid-term is 1.39.1.39!!! How stupid do you have to be to flunk Freshman S.A.G.E.? The essays are all opinion questions! Admittedly, not all of this is the Orange peoples' fault. The administration pursued an unwise course, decreasing the number of intrusive actions, with predictable results to general wellness. Now the dean claims that Orange residents' behavior, drinking and destroying furniture in their ofif-hours, has caused them to become stupid. Restoring the furniture in Orange to full health will not make the people Uvmg there any smarter, just as breaking a sadist's needle-nose pliers will not make him a better person. There are two types of people in the world, the stupid and irresponsible and the smart and responsible. However, the resnons^hle 7 18 GP A task ^ ^ ^xpect the few responsible people in Orange to rise to this betterment ^ w through no fault of their own, cannot undertake the asvlum tn Ph'1 tT” ' ^ people, I beg you to submit a vwitten request for asylum to Phil Barrineau. Then you will be moved to a better place. -Isaac Coleman ^ 7 c 1 of2 11/19/994'-'

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