Newspapers / Elizabeth City State University … / Nov. 3, 2000, edition 1 / Page 12
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12 The Compass November 3, 2000 • • Dear Vike, I have been dating my boyfriend for abnost two years and our relationship is a healthy and hap py one for the most part. However, recently after a football game my boyfriend had become drunk and verbally and physically abusive towards me when I refused to tell him my whereabouts while he was at the game. I know it is not wise to date someone who is abusive, but he only hit me once and he did so because he was drunk. I love him and rather than leave him for cursing and hitting me, I’d like to know how I can help him so that he won’t feel the need to curse and hit me again. Hurt and Confused Dear Hun and Confused, You can not change your boyfriend. However, you should talk to him and let him know that he can not hit you or anyone else whenever he wants under any circumstances. Let him know that you do love him, but you will not allow him to abuse you in any way. If he is not willing to learn how to control his anger, let him go. Dear Vike, I’ve been with my girlfriend since sophomore year, however, recently I’ve become attracted to other females on campus. My girlfriend is very special to me and I love her with all my heart, but for some reason I feel tempted to date these other females and leave my girlfriend. I do fear; however, that if it doesn’t work out with any of the other women, my girlfriend may not take me back. Should I sacrifice my relationship for these other females? Tempted to Explore Dear Templed to Explore, If you love your girlfriend as much as you say you do, you should not sacrifice your relation ship for those other females. What you should do is discover what attracts you to those other females and if it’s something within reason, suggest those types of qualities to your girl friend. Remember, don’t try to change her, but explain to her that you are not completely sat isfied and would like offer some suggestions that you feel will help the relationship. Editor^s Note: Questions to “Dear Vike” may be submitted to “Dear Vike”, do The Compass, Campus Box 815, ECSU. Viking Spotlight isBMMBUffin M 1 Mi « V A native of Jacksonville, NC, LaToya Rhinehart is a sophomore majoring in biology. LaToya’s hobbies include watching television and reading Ebony and Jet magazines. LaToya feels that these two maga zines are inspiring and they always give the best and latest news on African Americans around the world. Her favorite movie is Set It Off. At ECSU, LaToya has been a part of the Varsity Cheerleading squad. The sophomore said cheerleading is one of her talents. She has been a cheer leader since she was a toddler. LaToya’s goal is to graduate from ECSU and attend graduate school. The sophomore describes herself as an outgoing, crazy, cute and friendly person. LaToya’s slogan is, “believe in yourself and your dreams and goals will come true.” Born in Elizabeth City, Scott Michael Hammond, a graduate of Northeastern High School, is a sophomore Business Administration major. He enjoys golfing, tennis, swimming and sleeping. Scott is not clear about his career goals, but he knows that he wants to become a successful business person. He likes to look casual and comfortable, and he describes himself as a funny, out going and laid back person. ^ :(y- JOeM i-H J & K c 0 N S E R V A T 1 O N Brotha to Brotha l^m In Lo\^e by James Polk II The infamous Elizabeth City State University scenario: “You and your man” posted on the sidewalk or ‘greenbox,’ the plot tool, waiting for the next parade of Viking females to casually and unorchestrated come through. From about 30 yards out, you begin to run your limit ed, non-original database of icebreakers. This database includes the overused, “hey leopard skirt,” “ excuse me Ms. Parasuco,” and of coarse the all time favorite Pssst Pssst. Simultaneously, your are uncon sciously preparing the end of the experi ence with the traditional “Go ahead with your stuck-up ass!” or the timeless treas ure, “Damn! Ain’t like you a dime or something!” Now 1 dare not profess to be any kind of expert on the African American woman, (else I would not be single now) but Brotha to Brotha, I’d like for us to reexamine what we are doing. This young lady cornin’ down the sidewalk may not be your mother or the most beautiful woman in the world, but she is a part of a lineage that began the Earth and mothered all things thereof. These young ladies are the Black women of the future. In turn, they are the potential grandmothers, aunts, daughters and wives that have served as the backbones of our tribes in the villages and as the foundation of our families in the communities we live in today. Granted, Black women are the most demanding, the most complex, and the most passionate creatures on the planet. They are strong, yet soft, hard, yet sensitive and amongst all of this complexity they serve as the glue that has held an entire race of people together. It’s the Black wom en who mold and shape our very existence. I carry no blind eye, many times the young ladies carry themselves in a non queen-like demeanor which makes it diffi cult to relate to them. However, as humans we know not the art of perfection so we can expect imperfection. But again, we must appreciate the legacy from whence they come. There is no mystery that their expectations are extensive, intensive and undaunting, but one common denominator that we can all satisfy is appreciation. If nothing else, brothas have to realize that appreciation is the one single element that can lead to better Black women. In essence, as long as we continue to degrade, demean, and disrespect, we will ultimately be disappointed. But before I paint an all too dismal picture, 1 must point out that some of us get it right, maybe not often enough, but on many occasions we have exhibited a public appreciation for the strength, majesty and resilience of Black women on this campus and throughout the world. Black women need to know, not assume or suppose that they are appreciated espe cially by black men because generally speaking. Black women seek approval from Black men. "We have some work to do in establishing and maintaining successful relations with our sistas. So from brotha to brotha, let’s rethink the infamous scenario for if we don’t, it will begin with you and your man on the sidewalk and end with you and your man...on the side walk...passed on by.
Elizabeth City State University Student Newspaper
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Nov. 3, 2000, edition 1
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