N.C. ESSAY - PAGE 3
Features, etc
This author discusses the unusual
characteristics of the hole with
technical major, Joseph Good.
This author describes the
hole for the camera.
The technical team that certified the hole.
“holey, holey, holey .
The lower campus of NCSA
became a gathering place for
experts and laymen alike last
April first, when the greatest of
all natural phenomenon occured
... a hole. The proper term is
Depression Terms, or “hole in
the ground.” The hole came into
being some time between dawn
and dark of that day, but went
unnoticed for the most part. As a
matter of fact, it was totally
ignored. One reason for this may
have been that there were other
‘Depression Terms’ located in the
area. Well over a dozen, in fact.
Another was perhaps that this
particular hole was only average
in size and lack of volume.
In short, the population of
NCSA showed little or no interest
in the advancement, or even the
existance of the hole. The only
notice was taken by a drama
At 11:30 a.m. on March 31st, the
day before April Fool’s Day, a
small disaster briefly served to
bring the N.C.S.A. campus into
contact with the outside world. A
short, eight car freight train was
thundering along the tracks
below B and C Dormitories at ten
miles per hour, when a single car
abruptly toppled over and rolled
down into the lush, drainage gully
beside the tracks, losing its
wheels in the process. Spikes
were torn out of the ground,
several ties were splintered and
the train shuddered to a halt.
Within minutes the tracks were
covered with well-dressed
Railroad officials, coveralled
workmen and N.C.S.A. students
asking brightly, “Uh..wha’
happened?” This reporter was on
the scene talking to officials and
students alike.
Judy Cmmp, an eye-witness to
the deraihnent, said, “Well...I
was, you know, kind of in...well,
a brown study, as they say.
I was just staring, you know,
blankly out the window at this
train going by when I heard
something which I can only
describe as a loud crash. I was.
you know, sort of jolted back into
reality by it. Well, I though a
wheel had come off but then I
looked more closely and I saw
that one of the cars was on its side
in the gully. I realized then that it
had fallen right off the tracks! It
was terribly exciting!
Asked exactely what had
happened, one of the Railroad
officials replied, “We don’t know
for certain. Reckon one of the
cars fell off the tracks. We’ll
prob’ly hafta bring in
some....oh..bulldozers to get it
out!”
The rest of the cars were
recoupled and temporary ties
were put on the tracks to
facilitate the removal of the car
but nothing else was done that
day.
The following afternoon a
crane was eased down by the
tracks and after untangling the
hook from a tree the car’s con
tents, several riding-
lawnmowers were removed.
The car remained.
The next time anyone thought
to look on Friday, the car was
gone. There only remained a path
of scraped, red earth and the
memory in a few minds of the
spectacular event.
• • • •
student, Richard Maxwell, who
staged a record twelve minute
“hole sitting” marathon in the
early evening hours. When asked
about his concern for the hole and
his feelings about it’s existance
his only comment was “I wish I
had a blanket. I’m cold!”
His devotion, though short
lived, drew attention to the hole
and there was much discussion
and sniggering about it for a good
ten minutes. Then, suddenly,
without much advance warning,
the hole erupted, violently and
chemically. Two huge and
beautiful flashes of light burst
from the hole in rapid succession.
All activities ceased, and the hole
received it’s first general
recognition. Gasps and sighs
could be heard from the gathering
students and would-be sleepers.
The crowd, though small, was
alive with cries of “Where’s the
genie?” “It’s the end of the
world,” and “Ha ha ha!”
But the hole lay silent and the
novelty of it soon faded. Just as it
appeared the hole might lay
dormant for perhaps another
thousand years, it blew. A half
dozen blasts went off in the
vicinity of the hole, two in the
hole itself. The echos of the blasts
were heard all over the city, and
within minutes the campus was
swarming with experts on holes.
Naturally, the hole drew all of the
attention. Eight city police, plus a
plain clothed detective converged
on the hole. Photographs were
taken. The experts, along with
laymen from the school held
lengthly discussions about the
hole. A definite connection was
drawn between the blasts and the
hole.
As the talks continued, the
crowds grew. One bystander,
former architect Stephen Evens
stated that the hole was “without
a doubt, a depression in the
earth!”
Oddly enough, the other holes
were totally ignored by the
.authorities. A radical student
factor, attempting to have the
existance of these holes
recognized followed Maxwell’s
example, and staged a mass “sit-
in.” For a while, there wasn’t an
empty hole on campus.
Eventually the conference
broke up, with these conclusions:
1. The Depression Terms is
definately a hole.
2. The hole was created when dirt
that formerly occupied the space
was removed somehow.
3. This hole is not actually a hole,
but a scale model of a hole to be
erected at a later date.
4. This hole will shortly become
the final resting place for a tree.
5. The hole is one of the prettiest
holes the police have ever seen.
Many people now like the hole.
Others still don’t care. But no one
seems to mind the fact that good
old Mother Nature “shot her
rocks off” at NCSA
jon thompson....an’ ain’t you
sorry....
Next: The Grand Canyon -
Hole or Crevice?
women’s fall by Robin Kaplan
Buyers from women’s clothing
stores attend the Charlotte
Merchandise Mart an in
creasingly number of times each
year. This year there have been
markets nearly every six weeks;
six years ago there were four
primary shows a year and ex
periments with extras failed
because of poor attendance.
Salesmen, though, have become
reluctant to take to the road,
traveling monotonously from
store to store. Now store
representatives come to them.
These are not predictions, but
what was shown for early fall in
the Charlotte Mart, March 28 -
April 1.
LENGTH: most consistent skirt
length is 25” lots of slits and
slashing-revealing some leg
a return to the “CoachiMn’s
the bad speller’s dictionary
By CORTLANDT JONES
What does a person do if he
doesn’t know how to spell a word?
The well-founded thought would
be to grab a dictionary. Great,
but how do you find the word if
you don’t know how to spell it? If
you are not one of the lucky ones
who was taught phonetics, where
do you begin?
Joseph Krevisky and Jordon L.
Linfield have solved this problem
with “The Bad Speller’s Dic
tionary” from the Random House
publishers, priced at $1.00, for
sale in “The Book End.”
If you ever deal with essays,
office correspondence, ads,
articles, stories, manuscripts,
signs and official notices, this
book is for you. From the latter
examples Krevisky and Linfield
have collected a list of misspelled
words and their correct spellings
and compiled them in this small
paperback, copyrighted 1967.
To find a word, just look it up as
you think it is spelled and right
beside it is the correct spelling.
For example:
protatype - prototype
Minasota - Minnesota
Furthermore, the little miracle
worker goes one step beyond the
correct and incorrect spelling
route. Are you confused about
look-alike or sound-alike words?
The Bad Speller’s Dictionary
shows their meanings and
spellings at a glance. For
example;
fineness (being fine) - Finesse
(subtle, skill) Burro (donkey)
burrow (hole, dig) - borough
(town) lightening (making
lighter, relieving) - lightning
(flash in sky)
In the back of the book a quick
list of correct spellings is found.
The book has one fault and it
cannot be over looked. There are
not enough words. Although it is a
great help, I still come up with
words that are not listed. It
should be expanded to a full size
dictionary with thumb index.
The value of a text of this type
is unsurmountable for it cuts
time otherwise lost in w rd
searching. It belongs with the
indi spensable performances of
the English Dictionary and
Roget’s Thesaurus.
skirt”
a few unexciting quilted
“peasant” maxi skirts
nearly every dress line had hot
pants outfits - small slit body
dresses or tunics over matching
hot pants
WIDTH: wider, higher shoulders
very wide, pointed lapels
puffed up to “blown-up” sleeves -
- a continued “peasant look”
Dolman and raglan sleeves
JACKETS: long sharply tailored,
fitted or T-shaped, pointed lapels
long cardigans teamed with a
skirt or knickers
HOT PANTS: under skirts or
dresses
coupled with jackets
shown for fall in panne velvet,
velour, finer corduroys, even
satin
a few late summer outfits in
denim and cotton knit
DRESSES: the shirtdress
body dresses in jersey knits
reach to the knee in junior dress
lines and a few inches above the
knee in junior-petite dresses
most of the maxi dresses were
show in finer knits: jersey,
acrylic, and cotton
COATS: very tailored with wide
lapels and shoulders in smooth
wools, corduroys, denims, velvet,
an acrylic knit with a rich velour
finish
there are still some capes, shown
in livelier colors than last year
SHOES: the new shoes are to be
worn with paler stockings
strapped ankles, cork and
lightcolored synthetic soles,
suede sandals and wedges
higher heels than last year
above the ankle boots for pants
boots are expected to be even
stronger than last year
BELTS: still wide but not spartan
The emphasis in sportswear is
on separates:close to the body
sweaters and long cardigans are
worn with knickers, pants, skirts,
and hot pants. The sweaters are
bold-printed in stripes, nature
scenes, flowers, fruits, and ab
stracts. Cardigans are worn over
little matching sweaters. Colors
for this fall are strong and bright:
mst, berry, purple, and a vibrant
green.
President, Aardvark
Associates
Presenting
Mother Nature
Snacks
Watch for
announcements