pectmber 17, 1926
MAROON AND GOLD
11 SANTA
Paa:e Three
J A. NUT '§
V , .. .. w.
Greetings! Students! Greetings!
flere we are back again, better and
stronger than ever. Who said the!
3laro'on and Gold wasn’t coming out |
this year? This is some Christmas:
present, eh? Personally, I think more ^
of this one than any I will get this
Yiiletide. I think the Maroon and Gold
staff is just adorable to give us the
paper at this time, don’t you Amelia?
Christmas? That reminds us, have
vou ever stopped to count the couples
that have “busted up’’ in order to- get
out of buying a present? Boys, it’s
alarming.
We understand from several sources,
acd it’s reliable too, that Wiley is
working hard to get “Eich.You’ll
have to save like whiz to get in the
millionaire class, Wiley.
Xews comes to us also, that ‘‘Puny”
)ias had several dieticians plan him out
a diet that would aid him in getting
“Stout.” Wish we could help you,'
1)0V.
Dr. Harper had a good one pulled on
him by a porter on a dining car last
month while he was o'n his way to
Urbana, 111., to attend a convention of
the Christian church. The conversa
tion was as follows:
“Bill” Allen (at breakfast in din
er): “Say, Porter, will you please read
the menu for me? I left my glasses
in the drawing room.”
Porter: “Sorry, sah, but I newer
liaj miieh schooling either.”
Will seme one please give Madge
Wood another “Gunn” to take the
place of the one she just lost?
We have heard of marathon contests,
such as dancing and running, but this
is the first time we have heard of
marathon eating contests. Just linger
in the dining hall after the bell taps to
leave. Agnes and “Bubbles” Womble
are running neck and neck. It is be
lieved by the waiters that the race
rill be close. The laurels are about
qually divided at present.
No wonder “Tobe,” “Pill,”
'‘Squire, ” “ Hawk-eye, ” “ Abie, ’ ’
Garnet, Hoyle and George could shoot
?oals at Proximity. ' There were two
good looking girls in the balcony just
over the basket. We think it would
a pretty “nifty” idea to place
some Elo'n dames in the balcony over
Elon’s goal during the games here.
We wish “Handsome” Hook and
■'Professor” Cox would not corner the
market on “girls” as we would like
^0 get at least one or two foT our
selves.
‘‘Sister” Sexton and “Dad” Bello
running a pretty close race these
s. We have no idea which will win,
^^t it is understood (information com-
from several sources) that the
ifore-mentioned gentleman was made
^0 premise that he would w'rite more
®ften. Watch out, “Dad.”
It seems to be the fad these days,
^specially at Elon, for each girl to have
least three fellows. Had you noticed
Just look around and count them,
^^hen yon see a boy hanging around,
''■ith his liead drooped and looking
sorter” blue, you may know that
Jiumber two or three has his girl.
Well, the green leaves and grass have
left us, but we still have our Fresh
men.
It is rumored that Charles N’ewman
is in love. Is it true, Charlie? Stick
in there, don’t let “Handsome” bother
you.
We didn’t know until last Saturday
that Alec Wilson was a prize fighter.
Stick in there, Alec, you’ll be wearing
Tunncy’s crown yet.
» * *
“Smith-brothers” AllstoTi will re
feree the basketball game at Indian
Spring, Saturdiiy, between the Indian
Springs’ and Webb Park quintetts.
Webb has a strong team this year as
far as caging goals is concerned.
* * ■»
After Rosebud Kimball had been
here the first month, and added about
twenty pounds, she wrote her mother
tliat the board was fine, send up the
rest of the children.
# * #
“If it takes an hour and a half for
a ilea to walk across Niagara Falls on
a poano- wire, and two hours for a hard
doughnut to sink in a barrel of apple
sauce, how many yards of pickled tripe
will it take to make a pair of pants
for a baby elepliant?” So’s your aunt
Emmy. i
“This is the end,” cried Josh Har
rell as he brought in the pickled pig
tail.
IWO OF SENIOR CLASS
BEREIHEO OF FUTIIER
Malcolm A. McLeod and Kathleen Pas-
chall Each Lose Respective
Father.
This Christmas tide is one that brings
great sorrow to two of our fellow-
students. The fathers of Miss Kath
leen Pasohall and Mr. Malcolm Mc
Leod, Jr., have been called to' their great
reward. The entire student body, and
especially the Senior Class, wish to ex
tend their deepest sympathy to these two
friends in ■ this time of bereavement,
and hope that they may receive com
fort through the grace of our loving
Keavenl V Father.
AT THE DANCE
iVA' y/fw.
He (ecstatically)—Am I walking
on roses?
She—Make it toeses, kid, and
you’ll have it right!
An Old Maid’s Soliloquy
(An Apology to Shakespeare)
To ]narry or not to inarry? That is the
question.
W'hether ’tis indeed to suffer disap
pointment.
And the slights and scorns that fall
to' an old maid’s lot
Or to take up arms against a sea of
difficulties
And by fighting, win out over them?
To lose: to win:
Forevermore; and by winning to say
we end
The heart aches and the thousand
natural shocks
An old maid is lieir to: ’tis a con
summation
Devoutly to be wished. To' lose? To
win ?
To win perchance to be happy: ay
there’s the rub,
For in that winning of victory that
loss may come
When we have put away this maiden
freedom
Must needs give us pause; there’s the
thing
That makes calamity of so long life;
For who can bear tlie neglect and in
difference
Of the lordier’s will; of proud man’s
unconscious vanity?
The pangs of despised love; a careless
husband’s late delay in coming
home;
The spectre of the divorce court; or
the neglect^
Which young married women are sub
ject to, while their husbands are
petted and admired,
m
Alma Mater
Eton College, jY. C
Member Southern Association of Colleges
Foster Shoe Co.
Shoes, Hosiery and Shoe Repairing
BURLINGTON, N. C.
Aiul slie must needs be her own com
panion with a bare nod
From liim? Who would such bondage
bear
To weep and put up witli such a
Immiliating life
But that dread of something in after
years,
The unknown and dread calamity of
an old maid
From which no girl ever recovers;
puzzles a maiden’s will
And makes ug rather choose the lot our
mothers have known
Tlian tcv fall to another whicli we know
not of.
WHERE YOU LIVE
Friend—Are you walking to re
duce ?
She—No—where’s that?
Oil Formed by Fish
Two government scientists, Dr.
E. 0. Ulrich of the geological sur
vey and Dr. R. S. Bassler of the
National museum, have published a
book on the microscopic toothlike
fossils called condoclonts. The re
searches in connection with the
work are believed to have consider
able industrial value, particularly
to the petroleum industry. Sci
entists now think that the flesh of
Paleozoic fishes contributed largely
toward the formation of petroleum.
The teeth enable geologists to deter
mine the age of the various strata
of rock structure. As a result it is
possible to determine in a general
way the position of oil pools.—Path
finder Magazine.
WASHINGTON CAFE
Regular Dinner, 40c
Elon Students' Center
EUEIINGTON, N. C.
Telephone 492
^ ^ 1^1 ^
TAXI SERVICE
Packard Sedan
You Drive It Cars
CLINTON LEA
City Phone 700
All Closed Cars
Burlington, N. C.
DR. J. B. NEWMAN
Dentist
BURLINGTON, N. C.
Office In The Fonville Building
Phone 422
DR. FRANK E. GILLIAM
Dentist
Over Rouse Jewelry Store
Telephone 992
BURLINGTON, N. C.
DR. L. M. FOUSHEE
Dentist
BURLINGTON, N. C.
Office Over Freeman Drug Co.
Phone 29
T grieve not for my true love
However far away;
The sureness of his constancy
Is with me all the day,
A bond of faith that holds us,
Together though apart.
Ah, but I miss the lesser loves
That drifted through my heart,
* * *
Love is the most abstract, beautiful,
correlative, desperate, enchanting,
foolish, grandiloquent, hallucinating,
incentive, jubilant, keen, lamentable,
miserable, natural, overpowering, per
plexed, queer, reverential, speculative,
theoretical, ungovernable, vulnerable,
wholesome, xiphoid, gyevis, zealous
feeling imaginable, don’t you think
so?
_