Newspapers / Elon University Student Newspaper / Feb. 11, 1993, edition 1 / Page 3
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Op-Ed February 11, 1993 Page 3 THE DtFiar SEEyv\S TO 8& leveling OPP [ . A^JO COOKS UK£ £V£^/TUAlLV^ /rw/a STARTGO/MoOOU;\/AGAW ^ Angelou Sneed for trustee ® From Page 2 Recently, Sneed called me (''ia satellite) from Daytona, where currently ruining his Unbelievable, five-year perfect attendance record by lounging in a J^innebago in the infield of the *^aytona Motor Speedway. He "'anted me to pui his platform “to people” and to remind the ^niors that “a vote for Sneed is a ''Ole for Sneed.” A/o/e,- Sneed has recently ^^en under great stress (from ^^>nbling) and therefore some of planks may be a bit eccentric, ^ey should be viewed with an °Pen and sympathetic eye. Platform 1. The immediate ^instruction of an on-campus °oiball stadium. 2. Bus service to and from fathering places of students, and ^f^dcni housing, at regular, posted '"lies until 2:30 a.m. on week |'*8hts and 4:30 a.m. weekends ^^^30 a.m. to the ‘TKE” house). 3. The president of the ^*>ool must eat, and reside, on '^itipus. 4. All city elections are to be ■ ‘k !.»• ri ’ 3 I held on the first day of the second full week of each school year. 5. The immediate filling-in of the fountain with din lo facilitate a five-hole pulling green. 6. Teachers will teach a maximum of 7 courses a year, thus enabling them to devote more time to each student. (Currently, teachers have a 9-course load). 7. All first year students should have the option of taking their classes pass/fail. (There would be a strict attendance policy for students opting for ihe pass/fail semester). 8. The school’s mascot would be changed from an oxymoron lo a creature indigenous to the area - the three-headed turtle which you can observe sunning itself in the Carolina Biological pond. 9. Change the literary cannon. No one should escape college without having read Mailer, Vidal, Thompson, Wolfe, etc. 10. Change the school’s name to Sneed State. 11. Change the general requirements to a package which attempts to develop better humans i 3 1 .J 11 1 ic as well as better units for the work force. As you can tell, Sneed has done his research, and since J received his platform early, I was able to run it by some current members of the Board of Trustees before we went to press. The comments ranged from the bizarre to the obscene but all were complimentary. “Sneed’s platform is pure genius,” one Board member who wished to remain anonymous commented. “He’s the only man I know who can stand up to the people who run this school.” Dr. Eunif Philsner, professor emeritus in para-psychology and Board member-at-large, said, “Sneed’s a chain saw with an agenda. The only reason he’s not in charge already is that he’s desperately hated: the professors hate him for his mind and the students because he’s beautiful. His platform is the best I’ve seen, students should read it and reread it.” Remember, a vote for Sneetl is a i>ole Fo^ ^ncctf. i ^ n ) From Page 2 They all hear The speaking of the Tree. They hear the first and last of every Tree Speaks to humankind today. Come to me, here beside the River. Plant yourself beside the River. Each of you, descendent of some passed On u-aveller, has been paid for. You, who gave me my first name, you Pawnee, Apache, Seneca, you Cherokee Nation, who rested with me, then Forced on bloody feet, left me to the employment of Other seekers-desperate for gain, Starving for gold. You, the Turk, the Arab, the Swede, the German, the Eskimo, the Scot... You the Ashanti, the Yoruba, the Kru. bought Sold, stolen, arriving on a nighunare Praying for a dream. Here, root yourselves beside me. ,1 am that Tree planted by the River, Which will not be moved. I, the Rock, I the River, 1 the Tree. 1 am yours - your Passages have been paid. Lift up your faces, you have a piercing need For this bright morning dawning for you. History, despite its wrenching pain. Cannot be unlived, and if faced With courage, need not be lived again. Lift up your eyes upon This day breaking for you. Give birth again To the dream. Women, children, men Take it into the palms of your hands. Mold it into the shape of your most Private need. Sculpt it into The image of your most public self. Lift up your hearts Each new hour holds new chances For new beginnings Do not be wedded forever To fear, yoked eternally To brutishness. The horizon leans forward. Offering you space to place new steps of change. Here, on the pulse of this fine day You may have the courage To look up and out and upon me, the Rock, the River, the Tree, your country. No less to Midas than the mendicant. No less lo you now than the mastodon then. Here on the pulse of this new day You may have the grace lo look up and out And into your sister's eyes and into Your brother's face, your country And say simply Very simply ■ ■ . « >' t> '■ ii j i . I^ilh hope ^ = '' ^ ' fcood morning. iJ- II. ^ 'J. ■ T J- ^ . .1. VJ .T •; f d
Elon University Student Newspaper
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