Page 4
Opinions
Oct. 11,2001
Buy yourself a jacket
and sunscreen, now
get back to your life
Justin Mazzola
Sports Editor
Last summer people com
plained about global warming.
Last winter people complained
about the inevitable ice age.
So which is it, folks?
Apparently people think they
can stave off global warming by
driving electric cars and listening
to A1 Gore. Of course, this belief
is utterly false.
The Heartland Institute claims
a small amount of global warm
ing would benefit the world. Ac
cording to Heartland Institute
representative Dr. Patrick
Michaels, the Earth’s natural car
bon dioxide greenhouse effect
increased more than 50 percent
during the 20th century. But
Michaels has a simple explana
tion for the increase in average
temperatures.
“The small amount of warm
ing that occurred during the past
century consisted primarily of in
creased minimum temperatures at
night and during winters. This
means higher average tempera
tures, should they occur, would
not result in more daytime evapo
ration, which some claim would
lead to droughts and desertifica
tion.”
So that means global warming
is simply propaganda used by en
vironmentalists to continually
scare people. The impending ice
age, however, holds even less wa
ter. I mean ice.
Maybe we should ask the ex
perts, but they tend to agree as of
ten as shots of vodka in a belly of
beer.
The constant argument is Earth
endures an ice age every 100
thousand years. The last ice age
occurred (surprise) about 100
thousand years ago. That sound
you hear is the falling prices on
Wal-mart’s selection of snowmo
biles.
Did anyone catch last month’s
First International Conference on
Global Warming and The Next
Ice Age? If you happened to be
in Halifax, Canada, I hop^ you
found time to at least stop in for
a drink.
I’m sure the British were pay
ing attention, because apparently
global warming is fighting off the
next unavoidable ice age. Instead
of freezing over Scotland, Wales
and Northern England in less than
55 thousand years, the supposed
greenhouse effect is giving Great
Britain an extra 50 thousand years
of humanity. In celebration, Brits
have left their car engines running
while tearing down soccer stadi
ums. Oh, the humanity.
In the southern hemisphere,
Antarctica is melting quickly be
cause of the dreaded hole in the
Ozone layer. In fact, recent satel
lite studies have determined in the
past eight years, only 7.5 cubic
miles have melted away from one
of the continent’s glaciers.
That means by the time we cel
ebrate the turn of the century, the
aforementioned glacier will have
lost more than 90 cubic miles.
What are your plans for Decem
ber 31, 2099?
Parents are constantly telling
their children to avoid wasting
water. But if Antarctica is con
tinually melting, shouldn’t we
worry about too much water?
From now on, I want you all to
leave the faucet on while brush
ing your teeth. Take longer show
ers, too, because they make you
feel better, which will lead to a
more positive outlook when you
US government should not have
bailed out the airline industry
Cameron Dejong
Columnist
The recent $15 billion of
authorized aid to bail out the
airline industry is an ill-ad
vised decision made by Presi
dent Bush and the United
States Congress. While the in
tentions of this bail out are
most definitely reasonable, we
should consider other factors
when it comes to areas af
fected by the terrorist attacks
and even current policy by the
U.S. Government when it
comes to corporate welfare.
Airlines say they need the
money because the federal
government grounded all
flights for two days following
the terrorist attacks, and be-
cause there has been a 50-
75percent drop-off in air
travel since then.
That double whammy, they
say, cost the industry billions,
forced tens of thousands of
layoffs, and will bankrupt a
number of airlines.
We must ask, however, if
the government so easily has
given funds to the airline in
dustry, who will receive fund
ing next? Other industries that
took a hard hit after the Sep
tember 11 tragedies include;
Boeing Corporation, which
manufactures commercial jets,
says it faces a 40 percent fall-
off in production, and has al
ready announced it may lay
off as many as 30,000 work
ers by next year.
The hotel industry—which
is suffering from a dramatic
slump in vacation and busi
ness travel—says it expects “an
unprecedented wave of lay
offs.”
The major television net
works lost an estimated $500
million in advertising revenue
during the week following the
terrorik attack, when they ran
commercial-free, around-the-
clock news coverage.
Insurance companies will
have to pay out at least $20 bil
lion to $30 billion to victims of
the terrorist attack.
Investors lost an estimated
$1.4 trillion when the stock
market went into a historic free-
fall in the week following the
attack.
We all know that every
American individual and corpo
ration felt the hard-hitting im
pact of the events that oc
curred. We should not allow our
government to decide who gets
our tax money to deal with their
impact.
There are ways in which
Congress can help the airline
industry and have an immediate
im|>act without spending tax
payers’ money. For example,
Congress could declare the air
line industry a “tax-free” zone,
and remove federal taxes from
every aspect of the business-—
jet fuel, workers’ salaries, air
line tickets, corporate profits,
passenger facilities charges,
and so on.
“According to a study from
Americans for Tax Reform, 60
percent of the price of a typical
airline ticket goes to pay the
cost of laxesi” says Steve
Dasbach, National Director of
the Libertarian Party. He con
tinues, ‘‘’’Instead of taxing the
airlines so heavily and then us
ing that same money to bail
them out. Congress should
simply remove those burden
some taxes. Airlines would
find it much easier to make a
profit, even in these troubled
times, and the price of airline
tickets would fall, encourag
ing more people to fly again,”
According to the Cato Insti
tute, the federal government
spends about $90 billion a year
in direct aid to corporations.
“If the airlines are facing a
genuine crisis, why not take
away the $4.9 million Con
gress gives in a typical year to
Ernest & lulio Gallo; the
$308,000 it gives to Ocean
Spray; the $3 million it gives
to the California Raisin Board;
or the $500,000 it gives to
Pillsbtiry Corporation—and
redirect it to the airlines?”
asks Dasbach,
*^The power to save the air
line industry is within every
Americanwallet or purse.
Airlines aren’t hurting just be
cause of the two-day shut*
down; they*r« hurting because
of the huge dtop-off in air
travel that followed,”
The good news is that
Americans can solve that
problem by traveling again.
Reschedule a canceled trip.
Visit relatives across the coun
try. Don’t just sit around and
bemoan the plight of the air-
lines—book ah airline ticket.
Note—Much of the above
information was derived from
Steve Dasbach in a press re
lease by the Libertarian Party,
wake up one morning to find your
home buried in nine feet of snow.
Or maybe you’ll awaken to the
sound of your skin spontaneously
combusting due to global warm
ing.
Either way, the world won’t be
this way forever. So just relax and
enjoy the ride in the greatest ve
hicle of all - Earth.
Have an idea or topic you’d like
to express your opinion on?
Call or email and let us know:
penduIum@elon.edu 278-7247