page two - COUGAR CRY - APRIL 3, 1985 News From Arts and Science The Arts and Sciences Department, “Up on the Hill,” is very active as usual. Beginning this quarter a new sociology course was added. This course is through Hospice of Wilkes. Hospice of Wilkes provides services to terminally ill patients and their families in Wilkes County, mostly through trained volunteers. Hospice training prepares volunteers to work with terminally ill patients and their families. The course is a study of hospice goals and philosophy, patient/family dynamics, and bereavement counseling. The course also gives participants an opportunity to explore their feelings and beliefs about death. These training sessions are instructed by Edith Murphy and are offered now at WCC as a credit course. Sociology 0234. Copies of the Decameron are now being printed. The Decameron is the literary magazine of WCC. The annual publication is made up mostly by selections from Dr. Essie Hayes’ creative writing class from winter quarter, other students, and people of the community. Copies will be on sale in the book store or contact Dr. Essie Hayes or David Bentley. Chuck Sullivan, the visiting artist of WCC, is staying very busy visiting and teaching classes at the local schools. Travel study is very exciting as well as an educational experience. One of the travel study programs planned for this summer is to Mexico City. This program also counts as 3 hours of credit in Spanish. July 1-6 is the planned dates, which is very convenient for summer school students because school is out. Another travel study program for this summer is called, “Pacific Northwest.” Among the exciting activities on its itinerary is a three day cruise from Seattle to Alaska. Brochures and more information are forthcoming. For more details contact Glenda Addington. By Reggie Hill DAY AFTER EASTER MENU What would you like for dinner? Please indicate; nCreamed eggs l~l Deviled eggs Q Egg Salad COLLEGE LOANS CONFD FROM PAGE ONE number in college. N.C. PLUS Loans have the same residency and college enrollment requirements, but arc made to parents of dependent students or to independent undergraduate or graduate students. N.C. PLUS Loans differ from N.C. ISL because they are not tied to a family’s demonstra ting financial need. Students and/or parents interested in loans for educational purposes should talk with financial aid administrators or contact College Foundation Inc., 1307 Glenwood Avenue, Raleigh, NC 27605. Editorial Spring Again bv Bruce Groce Believe It Or Not Spring is back already, gang! Flowers are blooming and birds are singing. That bright sunshine is gleaming in the window of your dullest class. After your classes, the temptation probably overcomes you and draws you to Kerr Scott. An afternoon of sun and fun is an obvious cure - all and no one ever turns down a little “R & R.” Don’t try to fight it, my friends, ~ all work and no play makes Bruce a dropout (just kidding. Dr. H!) Consider this, though! Spring is a time for us to spend some precious time with our friends. Just look around at some of your closest friends — a lot of sophomores, huh? How would life be without them? Kinda lonely? I thought so, but that makes the time we have left with them all the more precious. By the way, speaking to those leaving WCC, thanks for your friendship, your mercy toward freshman (myself included!), and simply for being the people you are. Thanks for being there; we’ll miss you! e your are From the BSU A Word To Live By You’re too young. You’ve never seen the ad. Too many advertising patterns have changed since it was in vogue. But, it was great, then, in terms of identifying and touching a person’s longings. And the truth of it has application today in many different areas. It was the Kodak legend, “The pictures you will want tomorrow, you must take today.” Isn’t that simple? And profound! Everyone knows you can’t roll back the clock to take photographic snapshots of an event of last week. That photographing had to be done at the time of the event, in order for you to be able to enjoy it at a later date. You won’t need any help in applying this truth. It can be applied to learning (The test you would pass tomorrow requires study today.), mortality (The purity of life I desire for tomorrow “The pictures you will want tomorrow, you must take today.” requires the right decision today,) witness (The one you would see Christian tomorrow might need your witness today. God has his moments when the message of new life is best heard.), and on and on. A second-generation cousin wrote me for some family information recently. She said, “I can’t believe that I’ve lived in the same town all my life with grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins-most of whom are now gone-and didn’t secure the information I so anxiously want now. ” Often I remember words of Thomas Carlyle, who said, when his wife died, “Oh, that 1 had you with me five minutes more, so I could tell you everything.” There are clever slogans still: “You deserve a break today.” “Reach out and touch someone.” If you don’t look good, we don’t look good.” “We try harder,” and the like. But a singularly apt, inspirational, and instructional word for any generation, the one 1 hope you remember and translate into several areas of your life, is this one: “The 'pictures’ you will want tomorrow, you must take today. ” QUESTION OF THE MONTH How can those terrible income tax people expect anybody to save any money anytime for any reason anyhow? LOOK YOUR BEST FOR SPRING Use these ingredients to look your April best: 1 cup of neatness in dress Lots of cheerful disposition 2 sprinkles of color 1 large friendly smile Generous measure of under standing Mix well and all will be well. Nature Strikes Again Students beware! Here in our small community, students have been vanishing right under our noses. This was first attributed to dropouts until large masses of dirt appeared in the WCC front lawn. Further excavations resulted in the discovery of a mass grave layered with feathers. Apparently the ducks have had enough and revolted. The students were severly mangled and security is continuing the investigation. Further Cougar Cry interviews have revealed that several other students have been wounded by the animals. They seem to become airborne and attack from above. Security speculates that the ducks have been driven insane by over exposure to WCC students. Be advised to stay away from the roped-off grave and not to aggitate the half-crazed ducks. Escorts are available for protection. Easter Egg Hunt With Twist Something finally to be done about the missing pieces of the picture, the Egg, found on the wall in the Student Commons. Egg hunt to be held on April 4th. The person who finds the pieces of the picture will receive a free small coke from the cafeteria and a free tour of Hayes hall. Participants will be required to wear bunny suits and hop while searching. The winner is requested to be careful in handling the picture. Fingerprints will be used to find the thief. A reliable source was quoted, “The egg-lifter will be prosecuted.” Buck Hits Big by Bruce Groce A tremendous new craze has hit Wilkes. Many agree that it could be bigger than video games or E.T.! It’s new! It’s exciting! It’s Buck-You-Dummy T-shirts, teddy bears, buttons, and even flags! No one knows why this caught on so quickly, but many comment that is shows the “dummy in all of us.” Naturally, the craze caught on first at WCC, but seems to be spreading like wildfire across the U.S. Time is reported to be considering Buck for Dummy of the Year! Buck could not be reached for an interview, but sources speculate that he will invent a new branch of chemistry which can be read forward or backward! Surgeon General Examines the Hill Scientists for the Surgeon General have just completed a study of the stairs between Thompson Hall and the Technical Arts Building. The study was prompted after several students complained of shortness of breath and sore legs after climbing the steps (commonly called the hill). The scientists, headed by Professor I.M. Fuddling, forced five hundred white lab rats to march up the hill a hundred times a day for a two month period. There were no survivors. Professor Fuddling announced, “The death of the rats proved beyond a doubt the hill is a detriment to the health of the students.” The Professor suggested all classes on the hill should be canceled. Prestigious Award For Dr. Hendrix At a local convention on March 25, Dr. Jo Hendrix, head of the Math and Science Department at WCC, received a prestigious award from the Original Way to Teach Society. The award was for her amazing ability of constantly writing on the chalkboard without getting chalky fingers. Our sources tell us that her secret is simply mind over matter, and also a special chemical formula in her chalk. Whatever the reason for her clean fingers, we congratulate Dr. Jo on this special award. by: Elaine Cote' Three A wait Death Row School security caught three criminals pulling the stuffing out of the chairs in the student commons. This crime, which denies other personal comfort, is punishable be either a life sentence, or the gas chamber. When brought to trial, the three criminals could not deny their guilt because police found evidence of stuffing under their fingernails. The judge decided the three would face the gas chamber because of the vast amount of stuffing that was pulled out. The three criminals are scheduled for the gas chamber on graduation day in May. by Elaine Cote' Walker Community Center Hideaway for Aliens Little purple people were seen scattering across the parking lot of the John A. Walker Community Center. It is thought that they are being housed here by students of WCC that are researching their actions and behaviors. The Wilkes Community College Bureau of Investigations are planning on calling in their best men in order to find out what is truly going on. ET for WCC An ET look alike has just recently registered here at Wilkes Community College. He is often seen discussing computer programming with Mr. Pete Petrie since they are virtually on the same level. How are people reacting to this little fellow? Well, most of the guys have said that he is pretty cool and the girls just think that he is fabulous. This has proven that WCC has room for any kind of person even someone that looks like an alien. Ultimatum Issued Spring fever strikes Wilkes Community College. Class attendance drops drastically. Representatives from the college have warned any student caught cutting classes will be dropped automatically. Alternative plan considered. Classes may be held at W. Kerr Scott Dam. If approved, schedules will be posted on bulletin boards. Editors Note: This lampoon is only to poke fun at those who make WCC the great college it is!