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Winston-Salem., Friday, April 1st, 1932
HAPPY APRIL FOOL
Seniors Entertain Frosh
At Easter Egg Hunt
Stark Tragedy Occurs as
Popular Child Stumbles
One of the most delightful enter
tainments which has been given this
year was the Easter Egg Hunt which
the Seniors gave for the Freshmen
last Saturday afternoon. Each Sen
ior had three Freshmen under her
care, and with great delight showed
tliem around the campus. The Sen
iors evidently had no trouble remem
bering where they had hid the eggs.
They (the eggs, not the Seniors)
were all quickly found. The Sopho
mores and Juniors, secretly env'
were hanging from the windows
watching each move that was made
by the happy children.
Little Margaret Wall was greatly
pitied by the others when she let
loose Bebe’s hand and fell, dropping
her sucker and tearing her new blue
hair ribbon. She received only a
slight scratch on her left knee and
is cxpected out of the infirmary
sometime within the next few days.
Virginia Nall was awarded the
prize for finding the most eggs.
DO YOU RECOGNIZE THESE PHOTOGRAPHS?
Sophomores Are Rated
The Most Intellectual
Intelligence Tests’ Results
Prove Othbr Classes
Morons
By recent intelligence tests given
by Miss Foreman and Mr. McDon
ald, the Sophomore Class was rated
the most intelligent class at Salem
College. Those left behind are the
Senior, Junior, and Freshman classes.
This announcement came as a com
plete surprise to many girls not in
the famous Sophomore Class, but it
was fully expected and approved of
by the entire faculty. The class, on
account of this remarkable rating,
will be given Senior privileges be
ginning May 15, 1933.
Stupendous Crime Wave
Sweeps Salem Campus
Dalton and Brooks Are First
Suspected by Detectives
One of the most terrific cri
waves that has ever been known si:
the establishment of Salem Female
Academy in 1772 is now sweeping
over the entire campus. As yet the
Student Police Force has not been
able to break up the ring of gang
sters. The first case reported was
that of Mary Brooks. Miss Barrow
with her keen piercing eyes, noticed
that Mary paid little attention
class and that she stared steadfastly
at her feet which, due to the style
return to nature, were greatly
posed through the wide holes of her
sandals and her toe-less hose. On
,’cstigation she found that Mary’s
;-nails were painted a vivid red-
bird red. When questioned, Mary
gave no explanation. Further delv
ing into the case proved that the toe
nails when thus painted served as
mirrors, and instead of one reflection
vere provided by this novel
method.
This crime seems to have direct
association with names, for Mary
Maynard was the next to be caught,
—yes, caught in the act. She had a
‘Busy’ strung up on her boudoir door,
but a Student Council Detective, sus
pecting under-hand work, because of
the supreme and prevailing quietness,
entered to investigate. Much “top-
toe” scheming has been going on.
Famous Football Star
Discovered On Campus
Miss Sarah Graves Confirms
Reports of Astounding
Record
From the confessions made in
sleep, it has leaked out that Sarah
Graves was a star football player
during her high school career. While
modesty is all right in its place, this
star has, through pure ignorance,
done herself and Salem an injustice
by subduing her brutal strength and
commanding football ways. Oh ! How
long Salem has suffered defeats just
because a center forward of Graves’
ability was lacking! Researchers
found that this star’s speed chal
lenged that of “Red” Granger’s when
she started running toward the
my’s goal and that in every game she
never made less than four touch
downs for the opposing team.
Sports’ writers, although giving her
credit for speed and clearness of di
rection, have criticized Miss Graves
rather unjustly, we feel. Old papers
show that sport writers even had the
audacity to criticize her for allowing
the enemy too many “kick-ins.” 0ft-
seems that she confused football
with her minor sport, basketball, and
n with tlie ball the minute she got
in her hands, thus committing the
ost serious foul in football, that of
valking.”
Of course, only a narrow-minded
riter would criticize a player of
iss Graves’ ability for confusing
Many Foolish Wishes
For a Very Foolish Day
Supreme Excitement Reigns
As National Holiday
Arrives
Once again, dear countrymen, we
salute you on this bright, rainy morn
ing. The rain falls in torrents, but
the sun is high in the sky, so cheer
up. Hallowe’en is just around the
corner and hoop skirts are coming
back in style! The lambs are gam
bling on the green, and the bad little
grasshoppers are hunting for weeds
to lie down under.
December is almost over, and the
dawn is breaking up housekeeping.
Coal is cheaper and The Wife of
Bath is chaperoning Chanticleer and
pertelote to Kernersville—and Bab
hie and Rachel are wearing red but
tons on their alsos to get their beauty
sleep. School will be out in a minute,
and the flagpole is wrestling with
the snow storm.
Just the other day I saw some
body that asked me about you. He
was chewing gum and flying a kite,
as he rolled along in his Rolls-Royce.
Do you know who he was ? He was
very impressed when he saw you
sleeping at the night club the other
night.
Look out—nothing’s going to get
(Continued on Page Two)
WINNERS OF PASSES
The Secretary of State takes
great pleasure in awarding the
two annual passes to the follow
ing what-nots for their excellent
work on the committee of chalk-
gatherers. These girls began
their work no less than five
minutes ago and have continued
successfully for the past two
years. The passes are good for
two weeks on the Kress’s Limit
ed from here to Walnut Cove.
The honored winners are
Miss Pearl Button of the Adi-
torial Staff and Miss I. M.
Sleepy of the Edvertising Staff.