Thursday, April, 19, 1934.
THE SALEMITE
Page Three.
THE RING OF THE
NEED-A-LUNGS
(Continued from Page One)
Mrs. Corres Pond (drags herself from
chair to centjer of &.tage and
sings—tune: March of Men of
Harlech):
“T. B. pals, I pray, awake yon.
Please don’t let your wits forsake
you,
Tho’ consumptive coughs do shake
Never shall we die!
Razzpuddin must suffer!
We will treat him rougher!
We will tear the louse to shreds.
And see which one of us is really
tougher.
We will feed him worms and bull
frogs.
We’ll dig his grave too deep for
ground hogs.
He must pay, without delay—
Razzpuddin, beware!”
Enter T. B. germs, who perform a
grotesque and mournful dance—Exit.
All invalids (sing piteously, tune: Go
Cut Down the Old Pine Tree):
“Oh, go cut down the old pine tree
For we’ve all got the bug T. B.
Please make a coffin of pine
For this one lung of mine.
For we’ve all got the bug T.B.
Hie and Cup (skip gayly in and sing
spiritedly, tune: Finicnli, Finicu-
la):
“Some think the world is made for
fun and frolic,
And so do we, and
But you’re all sick in bed with T.
B. cholic.
As we can ,
Now come and try to pull your
selves together.
While we count three, while
count three.
For we’ve a plan that’s truly very
As you’ll agree, as you’ll agree,
^ Razzpuddin is coming here tonite!
We’ll make him pay for vour sorrv
plight,
Ra, ra, ra, ra, and sis, boom, ba,
Ra, ra, ra, ra, and sis, boom, ba.
We will make him tell the doctor
How to make you well.”
I.illy Pond, dressed as nurse, enters,
tor sings—tune: St. James’ In
firmary) ;
“Oh, I came down to the Need-;
Lung Infirmary,
And found my sweet Lilv here,
Dressed up in a nurse’s apron,
So clean, so brave, so dear—
Lily:
“Won’t you go, won’t you go, my
hero?
Your life’s in danger here—
Razzpuddin will come and kill you.
And that I sadly fear.”
Tidbit:
“Let him come, let him come; the
villain!
Him limb from limb I’ll tear.
But first he must cure these
sumptives.
And that I solemnly swear!”
Mrs, C. Pond (tune: A Hunting We
Will Go):
“Oh, swear with all your might:
Get ready for a fight.
For Razzpuddin, the nasty man
Is coming here tonite!”
Hie and Cup (skip merrily around
and sing—tune: Who’s Aft’aid of
the Big Bad Wolf):
Oh, who’s afraid of Razzpuddin,
Of Razzpuddin, the nasty man.
We’re gonna catch him if we can—
Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha!”
All sing (tune: She’ll Be Coming
’Round the Mountain):
“Oh, he’ll be comin’ after Lily
When he comes, when he comes.
And I bet she’ll be scared silly when
he comes—
He will put the ring upon her
Then she, too, will need a lung for
He’ll be coming after Lily when he
Tidbit (tune: Washington and Lee
Swing):
“Oh, don’t you fear, my dear, for I
And I will bust his nose and chew
Lily:
“But he’s so tall, my love, my life,
I fear you’re riding for a fall.”
Tidbit:
“Why I can mall that prune from
now till June,
And then at last in peace with you
I’ll spoon—
Just let me at that guy. I’ll black
his eye! muss his tie!
Villain, prepare to die!”
Hie (to Mrs. C. Pond—tune; Yankee
Doodle):
“At twelve tonite Razzpuddin comes
To hypnotize your daughter—’’
Hie and Cup:
“But we just won’t allow him to
Do things he hadn’t oughta.”
Cup:
“Jump in bed and hide your heads;
Cover up, pretend you’re dead.
Soon some blood is to be bled.
Get ready for the slaughter.”
(All hide under covers in wheel-chairs
and pretend to be asleep. Doctor
conceals himself behind Lilv’s chair.
Lights srow dim. Razzpuddin enters
steaHhily, followed by Cabooso with
wheelbarrow.)
Cabooso (drones—tune: Where Do
In My
You Worka, Joe?):
“Three cheers for da Cabooso;
He bringa da wheelbarrow;
He hava da Kleenex so
Da Need-a-da-Lungs can blow.”
Razzpuddin (tiptoes to Lily’s chaii
and leans over her, gli "
acingly—tune: You’r,
Power):
“You’re in my power—
Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha—
My prairie flower.
Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha.
I’m a big, bold villain
When you’re unwillin’
To give your lung to me.”
Caboosa (tune: Where Do You Worka
Joe?):
“Oh, watcha da Razzpuddin,
Da bigga, da badda man.
What doesa dis big man do?
He puts da ring on da hand.”
Doctor Tidbit (jumps out from hid
ing place, tussles with Razzpud
din, and holds him powerless.
Sings—tune: You’re In My Pow-
“You’re in my power.
Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha.”
Raazpuddin:
“I’m in your power.
Boo, boo, boo, hoo, hoo.”
Hie and Cup:
“He can fake it, but he ci
Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha!”
Mrs. Pond (tune: I’ll Be Glad When
You’re Dead, You Rascal You):
“We’ll be glad when you’re dead,
you rascal you.
After all the coughs and lung aches
we’ve been through.
’Though you look quite like Clark
Gable,
You should be locked in a stable.
All:
“We’ll be glad when you’re dead
you r
Hie (tune: Who’s Afraid of the Big
Bad Wolf?)-.
“I bid to kill him.
Ah, ha, ha, ah, ha ha.”
Cup (hitting at him):
“No, I bid to kill him.
Ah, ha ha,”
Mrs. Pond:
“Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah!”
Doctor (to Pazzpuddin—tune: Ase’s
Death):
“You’re going to die.
So- you’d better say your prayers.”
Razzpuddin:
“Bury me deep.
In red flannel underwears.”
(Mrs. Pond suddenly shoots Razzpud
din dead as a doornail—Everybody
screams. Hie and Cup jump and clap
gleefully, and there is much ado.)
Mrs. Pond (tune: How’m I Doin’?)
“How’d I do it, hey hey
Twee, twee, twee, twa, twa!”
Hie and Cup:
“With a little bullet, hey hey.
Aw, gee baby, aw shaw!”
Mrs. Pond:
“Now, I’m not just the best shot
Hie and Cup:
“But you sure gave that nasty man
the run around.”
All:
“Bullet’s thru his gullet, hey, hey,
Twee, twee, twee, twa, twa!”
(Cabooso pokes Razzpuddin in wheel
barrow, covers his face with Kleenex,
and trundles him off stage.)
Pond (tune: Sweet Sue):
o more T. B. germs;
e got two good lungs—”
All:
“Me, t
“No more coughs and groans;
No more sighs and moans.
For you, or you—”
All:
“We feel well again.
Since old Razzpuddin
Has a bullet thru his gullet.
Thanks to you!”
Mrs. Pond:
“Oh, I didn’t mind—
He strung me a line.”
All;
I, too!”
“Me, too!
(Dr. Tidbit and Lily have been whis
pering lovingly together. Suddenly
Tidbit sings.)
Tidbit (tune: Wedding March):
“You’ll be the bride.
Groom by your side—
Razzpuddin’s died
With a bullet in his hide.”
All:
“She’ll be the bride,
Groom by her side—
Razzpuddin’s died
With a bullet in his hide.”
All (tune: Wrightsville Beach)
“Razzpuddin’s dead, shot thru the
Enough is said, the Razzpuddin’i
And there you see, a groom to be
And sweet Lily, saved from T. B
Her mamma is happy, hey! hey!
She oughta be happy. I’ll say,
’Cause Lily’s got a Tidbit,
And it won’t be long.
The Need-a-Lung ring
No more will bring
To us T. B.
That old nasty thing!”
(Curtain)
“Sign of Distinction”
JUNIOR LEAGUE
BEAUTY SHOP
Robert E. Lee Hotel Bldg.
Salon Ensemble Is
At Salem
Concert Is Greatly Enjoyed
The Carolina Salon Ensemble of
the University of North Carolina gave
a delightful concert last Friday eve
ning in Memorial Hall. The follow
ing program was presented under the
leadership of Thor Johnson.
I. Overture in D, from “Cephale
et Procris” Gretry
II. Intermezzo, from “L’Arles-
ienne Suite, No. II” .... Bizet
III. Concerto in D minor, Opus 40
MendeJssohn
Allegro appassioniita
Mr. Liverman, with orchestral
accompaniment
IV. (a) O du Mein Holder
Abendstern, from “Tann-
hauser” Wagm
(b) The Two Grenadiers
Schumann
Mr. Brietz, assisted by Field with Mr.
Murphy at the piano.
Intermission
V. (a) Bourree Bach
(b) Adagio, from Sextet,
Opus No. 81 Beethoven
(c) The Guitar Player
Schytte-Johnson
VI. Two Impromptus for Contra
bass, Opus No. 3, Nos. 1 and
2 Murphy
Mr. Murphy with Mr. Liverman at
the piano.
VII. Thornrose Waltz, from “The
Sleeping Beauty
Tschaikowsky
VIII. Procession of the Sardar, from
“Caucasian Sketches
Ippolitow-Iva^ow
Soloists with tfhe orchestra were
Mr. Hubert Liverman, piano; Mr.
John Murphy, Contrabassist; Mr.
Dan Field, Violoncellist; and Mr.
Raymond Brietz, Baritone.
LE CERCLE FRANCAIS
Le Cercle Francais meets tomorrow
afternoon at 5 o’clock in the Recrea
tion Room of Louisa Bitting with
Zina Vologodsky as leader of the pro-
THE A. A. U. W. MEETS
AT SALEM
Last Tuesday evening the A. A. U.
W. held its monthly meeting. At
this time Dr. Mary L. Johnson, of the
Meredith College faculty, addressed
the group. Dr. Johnson is the sister
of Dr. Wingate Johnson of this city
and an outstanding woman of the ed
ucational group in the state.
A business meeting followed tlie
lecture at which time the new officers
Did you know that the National
Geographic Society puts out a weekly
bulletin called the “Geographic News
Bulletin”? If you have never read
one, go to the Science Library and
look them over. They’re interesting.
CAROLINA
MON. - TUE. - WED
THUR. - FEI. - SAT.
FREDERIC MARCH
“DEATH TAKES A
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Dr. Robert N. Walker
Optometric Eye-Speclalist
300-1-2 Reynolds Bldg.
The
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