Page Two
THE SALEMITE
March 24
1950
^lUi 96. OuA. jUgaJ^ ...
. . . Salemite. Next week Clara Belle and her
staff will take over. For \veeks we have been
waiting for today. We kept thinking:
Monday Carter won’t have to think ni)
features. Ruth won’t have to write World
News. Mary Lib won’t have to chase people
down when they don’t get their assignments.
Tuesday we won’t have to borrov,^ a car to
go to the Journal-Sentinel for mats. No climb
ing four flights of stairs to carry pictures or
one of AValdo’s or Polly’s cartoons to Pied
mont Engravers.
ANednesday M. T. will get to talk to Dr.
Singer all afternoon about “How New AVill
the Better AA'orld Be” instead of trying to get
all the ads in and avoiding tombstone heads
in the dummy. Norman can read a book on
Shakespeare’s Comedies instead of writing an
editorial about cuts. Rosalyn won’t have to
carry a list of ads to the Sun. Bob Gray can
read another AA^ilkie Collins’ novels rather
than worrying about National Advertising-
rates and balancing his books.
AVednesday night will be free. Sybel and
AVinkie won’t have to write another para
graph to make their cob.unn long enough.
Miss Byrd can grade her comp papers with
out being interrupted by an editor who hasn’t
enough copy to fill a six page paper.
Tlmrsday we can drink coffee at AVelfare’s
in,stead of working at the Sun. AA^e won’t
have to worry about dropping headlines or
about mats blistering. Clara Belle will have
to worry about mistakes in the galley proofs
and Lee will have to write another cut line.
AA^e can even go to the dining room Thursday
night without ink smeared faces.
Friday there will be no last miimte dashes
to the printing company to see if the plates
finallj" came from the Engravers. Helen won’t
have to go to all the dormitories to deliver the
finished product. Squeaky won’t have to get
ads for next week. AVe won’t have to worry
about the mistakes we missed when we read
the page proofs or because there is no news
on the back page.
AA^e’ve been thinking about this for weeks.
Today we’re through. AA'e’re free. AA^e can
do all the work we said we didn’t liave time
to do. Now we’re remembering:
. . . the afternoons that Dr. Graniley found
time to help us with the paper. Especially
the afternoon he brought us chocolate candy.
... the countless talks with Miss Byrd about
everything from getting freshmen on the staff
to getting bound copies of the Salemite. Many
times we really hacl problems but other times
we just used the Salemite as an excuse to talk
with her.
. . . the time we were in a pinch and Dot
Grose at the Journal-Sentinel sneaked us a
plate that wasn’t supposed to go out.
. . . the days at the Sun. Francis worked
overtime when the copy wasn’t finished for
the Christmas issue. Bill leaded for us when
stories v.mren’t long enough. Henry let ns
clutter the print shop when we made hats with
the scraps from his paper cutting machine.
Mr. Russ always had a new word, or a new
joke. Lida Ruth got us a bottle of lotion to
keep us from ruining our hands with La'^'a
soap and Boraxo. Mr. Cashion was always so
patient even when we didn’t get the copy to
him until Thursday morning. AA^hat’s more
he kept us liappy when we got lines in upside
down and spilled galleys. He was half the
fun of tlie Salemite.
. . . the Friday afternoons we waited for
the finished Salemite to come. AVe usually got
a copy from under the steps in Bitting toT-ead
at dinner. AVe said we only wanted to see
how many mistakes we missed but we really
just wanted to look at the finished product.
AA^e remember. AA^e don’t sympathize with
the new staff. AA^'e envy them.
Dale Smith
Advice, Definitions, Lajfs,
Given ToNevj Salemite Staff
By Lee Rosenfalom
It was just about this time last
3‘ear when I first -wandered into the
■ catacombs. At that first Salemite
meeting last year I was bewildered
—Beats, associate editors, make-up,
Sun, features—all were just one
big jumble in my mind. So, for the
new staff, I have writen here a
list of explanations or definitions
-\\-hich I hope will be of aid to them.
Piditors-iu-chief — Possessed of
bangs and usually has a -worried
harassed look. When asked a ques
tion they -ivill usually answer with
“I svill print anytliing you write”.
These creatures consume cpiantities
of coffee, and do not sleep. Their
apptites are, however, quite heal
thy (as are the appitites of brun
ette associate editors). If you are
not positive that this is a real edi
tor-in-chief look on the an-ns and
face: If you can distinguish one I
or more ads or headlines printed
there, you have found an editor-
in-chief.
.Associate Editor—They may be
blonde or brunette, but are always
possesseti of thousand of blue slips.
Alth.ough these creatures are sel
dom seen, they can be identified by
the said slips of blue paper. The
slips will be found in your box
every Monday night. On the paper
will be written notes in Sanskrit
which are very explicit. Now, fut
ure re])orters, here is how you dis
tinguish between blond and bru
nette associate editors. Blond ones
write such things as Ala Cherie, do
the column this week, please. Love,
Carter. While brunette associate
editors often rvrite News story—
Elections—Love, Ruth. Brunette
associate editors often are addicted
with a strange desire to ice-skate.
Upon hearing the strains of a waltz,
they will jump on the top of the
table in the Salemite office and do
a figure eight.
Alake-up Editors — These crea
tures are often very amusing. They
may bear a resemblance to Louella
Parsons or Doll Tearsheet. When
this creature asks you if you will
fill a column, do not fill insulted.
Just answer, yes, and let her worry I
about it. However, if the above
rientioned creature tells you that
you will have to be cut, do not
agree. Just take my advice on
these two points and do not at
tempt to delve further into the lan-
gua,ge of newspaper women. Next
and most important when the copy
editor says that there are holes
in the paper, run rapidly in the
opposite direction. .At these times
she may- become quite violent.
Hermes—a bust which may be
found on a sr.iall stand in the cor
ner of the Salemite office. Hermes
is extremely sympathetic and does
not mind if you cry on his shoulder.
Hermes also makes a good target
for water gun practice.
Circulation Alanager — These
strange animals often have a dis
ease known, as distortion of the
r i g h t h a n d. This occupational
disease is contracted while placing
Saiemites in boxes on Friday nights.
Dryness of the tongue is another
sympton of this strange disease.
Licking stamps to mail Saiemites to
subscribers c'utses this phenomena.
Circulation Alanagers may also be
identified by their lovely' yellow
convertibles—^vhat strange and
miraculous creatures.
Lrhtorial Writers—A’ou will have
no difficultv in identifiving this one.
He is exttremely talented with a
water gun, and it has been rumored
that he can hit Hermes in the eye
at twenty paces. I have reason to
believe that this is true. A certain
well known critic and scholar once
dubbed this animal “Perpetualpro-
tester”. However, do not attempt
to remember this scientific name.
Pie is familarily known as “Any-
thing you can say-, I can say' better,
or “Prove It!"
Business Manager—This creature
is also an inhabitant of the Cata
combs. He can be recognized bv
such mumbling as “National .Adver
tising, seventy-five cents a column
inch and O Fudge, an eight page
paper! .Another characteristic of
this animal is a love of railroad
trestles and train whistles. If you
\vould like to see this mess of effi
ciency' look on a cane bottomed
chair in the Salemite office. If not
there look in the nearest filing
cabinet.
Leppert Reads Smollett;
Recommends Black Beauty
Salemite
Published every' Friday of the College year by the
Student body of Salem College *
EDITORAL DEPARTMENT
Editor-in-Chief Dale Smith
Associate Editor Joan Carter Read
Associate Editor _Ruth Lenkoski
Assistant Editor Clara Belle Le Grand
Make-up Editor _ Mary Turner Rule
Copy Editors Mary Lib AA'eaver, Jane Fearing
by Betty Leppert
Roderick Random is a perfectly
delightful yarn about a carefree,
\v:uidering rogue; who, born as a
child of misfortune, (the financially
stable members of his family hated
him), managed to break away from
the horrid environment to which
he was bound, to lead a life of
gay and fantastic adventure. Dar-
ing and devil-niay'-care, he engaged
in a veritable myriad of strange
and sordid activities, (too shocking
to enumerate), each one augment
ing his steady' growth of character
and gradual loss of naive gullibility;
the latter of which caused him no
end of perilous experiences. Therein
lies the unity of the story—for
heaven only knows, there is none
m the plot, which is a tangled web
of circumstances if ever there was
one ! Indeed ! The average person
may find it difficult to pursue the
novel to its climax, which is, in
cidentally, an advantgeous one for
all^ the principal characters.
The author of this tale is the
late Tobias Smollett, whose very
name - is what we of the more eso
teric literary cliques would term
I onomotopoetic ; for his work, above
mentioned, is fairly fraught with
lewd, lascivious, rascally and rois-
terons references, allusions, impli-
catiLUis, and even direct remarks
of his nature; and one is led to be
lieve that this is but a manifesta
tion of the writer’s own personal
traits. There’s certainly nothing
aesthetic or spiritual about this
man!
Now, I have no intention of re
lating to you the multifarious cir
cumstances of this action-packed
thriller, for that would be giving
the story away, and then yon would
say to yourself “Heigh-ho! Now
I m saved the trouble of reading
the thing for myself and this would
never do; for vicarious experience
simply does not provide one with
the experiences a truly full Hfe
demands.
And now, because of overpower-
mg circumstances I shall dose this
pithy review with a gentle admoni-
lon; You’d be far happier, my
L-iend, if you chose to read Black
Beauty or The Young Folks’ Trea-
sury and left Roderick Random on
the shelf!
In answer to the article written
hast week in the Salemite concern
ing the Pierrettes being made a
major organization, I would like to
say, first, that the enthusiasm has
not died down. AVe still feel as
strongly about this proposal as we
did before and would like to have
student backing.
The main purpose of the Pier
rettes is:
To promote dramatic interest on
campus and give students the op-
portumty to participate in drama
tics and to develop an apprecia
tion for dramatic art.
As many hours are spent work-
(Continued on page seven)
by 'Winkle Harris and Sybel Haskins
The sun wa.s shining- and Aeti’s heart lean d
and bounded as she walked to ehapel. Snp ^
wa.s lier in all its glory; Alay Day wouldT
soon, tlien the summer, then she would h ^
SENIOR. She visualized herself in the statV-
black cap and gown. '
Aeti took her place in ehapel and the an
nonneements began. The Hall was buzzine
with cheerful conversation. Through the noist
there sudd.enlv came two words “RODIW
DRAAVING.” Dead silence. Then came !
murmuring—a groaning—a welling up of ter
ror in each heart. Neighbor clutched neioh
bor in fearful dread; Big sisters tried to pro'
tect little sisters from the danger. Seniors
looked relieved; freshmen looked bewildered
To no avail, the decision was made. “The re
cessional is ‘Are A”e Able’.”
Acti dragged her feet outside. The skv
had darkened; the thunder shook the heavens-
the damp rain curled Acti’s hair into tiny
ringlets. As she dragged along she was joined
by her future suitemates. The ‘‘unlucky four”
yvalked together remembering the 296,297 298
and 299 they had drawn the year before.’ ’
The freshmen were to draw the following
Tuesday. The innocents walked to the room
where “IT” was to take place with faltering
bewildered steps. Aeti peered in at them
through the window. As the drawing took
place, she saw the looks of young innocence
replaced by ones of horrified disbelief and in
credulity. Some staggered; others fell; some
shouted; others cried. Acti shook her head
sadly “Life”! she said. Acti went into the
chamber to wipe the fevered brow of her little
sister.
The sophomore drawing came on AA^ednes-
day. The footsteps of these second vear stu
dents were a little surer and a little firmer.
But there on their faces was a look of numb
disbelief and incredulity. They were able to
walk to the room with only a' little support.
Aeti peered through the window at them. As
each girl drew, ,she saw the looks on their
faces change from disbelief to cynical wisdom.
Life I ’ said Aeti. She went in to stroke the
hands of some. She thought that perhaps
through comforting others, she could stop the
fear which was mounting in her own heart
with each drav.dng. Her hands began to quiver
at the thought that, “AA'e’re next” The terror
grew unbearable.
^ Aleanwhile, the seniors went about with a
business - as-iisual - and-boy-we’re-getting-out-
soon - we - don’t - have - to - worry - about -
room - drawing - look. They played bridge;
they played canasta; thej’ won the hopscotch
tournament. They patted the heads of under
classmen patronizingly. “Life” thought Acti.
Then came Thursday. “The” day. Acti
spent the day in her room, counting the three
walls. She gorged, herself on Hatacol. She
lined her suitemates along the wall; a horse-
■snoe was twisted around the neck of one;
another carried 800 rabbit’s feet; the third
bore Acti to the drawing.
They reached the room. A look of cynical
Wisdom was on the faces of the Juniors. Acti
felt herself propelled to the desk where the
fateful slips lay. “I can’t” she screamed and
lan for the door. Six muscled arms caught
hpi’- The line froms to the rear—of Acti.”
came a voice. Aeti’s suitemates held her up
as someone placed her hand on top of the
mound of papers. “Pick one.”
But which one” mumbled Aeti.
“Go on,” “Hurry up”, “AVe can’t stand it
much longer,” came voices from the rear. Acti
clutched a piece of paper. “Look at it” she
commanded someone.
Aeti” her suitemates screamed, “You drew
number one. A”ou get to go to Bitting!!”
Life murmured Aeti as she swooned to the
ground.
She woke from her faint to hear an an
nouncement from the dean.
Room for all seniors in Bitting next year-
New wings to be added to Bitting to make
room for everyone —System of drawing
lising seniors to be eompltely revised.”