April I, 1966
THE FULL MOON
Undoubtedly, the Albemarle
Senior High School police force is
the best in the county. This force
goes by the official name of the
Parking Lot Patrol. This patrol
is on duty throughout fourth
period and is very efficient. It
always gets its man. So park
your car in an inconspicuous
place, like on the back exit road
so you won’t be noticed. Better
still, take the underground rail
road, sponsored by $am the
Bookie and associates. Mr. B. is
happy to serve you in any way
that he possibly can. SPECIAL
CONTEST! GUESS WHO IS
SAM THE BOOKIE AND GET
YOUR NAME IN THE PAPER
IN CAPITAL LETTERS AND
UNDERLINED. CLUES WILL BE
HIDDEN THROUGHOUT THE
SCHOOL IN UNEXPECTED
PLACES. THE FIRST PERSON
TO GUESS THE REAL NAME OF
$AM THE BOOKIE GETS HIS
NAME IN THE PAPER! (Mem
bers of the journalism class and
their families are not ejigible to
participate.)
All chucks in this school are
hereby ordered to report to the
head of the parking lot patrol
to repair the damage they caused
by making those chuckholes in
the parking lot. Failure to heed
this order will result in immedi
ate imprisonment under the
stage or immediate payment of
a fine not less than fifty dollars
to Mr. B.
The following cheer is to be
adopted by the student body:
What are we gonna do? Give
them hail Blue. Rip them up,
tear them up, give them haii
Blue!
Students, support your school
subversive activities. Support
the Underground Railroad.
Though Underground is a misno
mer, support it. $am the Bookie
has recently entered into a cor
poration with the Mars-Venus
Transit Company and has -ar
ranged for a flying saucer to
make two runs daily to Good
Buddie’s. Come try this new
trend in transoortation and en
tertainment. Climb the flagpole
some afternoon at about twelve
thirty and meet the student’s
friend, Zlrxqpn Nqrtnzqbv. He
is your friendly pilot and his
saucer is covered by the Blue
Cross group insurance plan. Be
to Buddie’s and back in 1.57 x
10-99999 seconds. Instant trans
it at your easy reaching. Rides
cost only 23 dzmpbq and are
really worth the monev. Flights
depart from the flagpole at 12:30
and return at 12:30.00000000000
OOOOOOO.')?. Be there and back
before the Flagpole patrol can
find you out.
Page 3
Dear
MoutHI
I have a terrible problem.
Lately, I have put on a pair of
short - shorts a few afternoons
and shot a little basketball
(just for the heck of it, of
course!) and now I’m in a mess.
My legs are so beautiful that the
girls are storming my locker
every morning and carrying me
home piggy - back every after
noon. And the senior girls have
decided to leave for posterity a
bronze impression of my legs in
a new extra-large trophy case,
built just for this masterpiece.
My problem is—ah, I don’t know
how to say it. Well, MY FEET!
No one has ever seen them, and
I’m so afraid that when I re
move my shoes to make the
mold, the girls will see my eight-
inch-long toes. Help!
Jolly Joints Tommy
Dear Joint,
I’ve searched every store in
town and finally found your solu
tion—Playtex Living Feet.
• » •
Dear Mouth,
Every morning as I step out
of the housing to leave for
School, a very colorful bird
swoops down from the heavens
and flies up my nose. Although
I suffer no great discomfort, I
find that I have trouble breath
ing. Do you have any sugges
tions that might rid me of this
feathered friend?
Clogged Nasal Passages
Dear Clogged,
Perhaps you could try letting
an elephant carress you with his
toes. But by no means harm the
bird. This rare bird is close to
extinction. See a doctor who can
offer you practical advice or a
taxidermist with cheap rates.
* * •
Dear Mouth,
I’m about to lose my mind!
The Junior-Senior Prom came up
so suddenly this year, and all .the
juniors have been madly rush
ing around trying to get ready
for it. Gee, I sure hope we can
put up all these decorations by
tonight. But what if we can’t
finish it in time! If there is no
prom, there will be no juniors
left alive to be seniors next year.
What shall I do?
Crying Catherine
Dear Crying,
Don’t worry. If you are un
able to carry out your original
plans. I have good news. Cam
West has offered his house for
the location of the prom. No
decoration is needed. The theme
will be the “King’s Palace.”
BOONE
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Laundry and
Cleaning Village
Cleaning Plant
Albemarle, N. C.
LUMBER
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Paints, Building Materials,
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South First St. 982-2114 Albemarle. N. C.
Meanwhile, our two ferocious heroes prepare to rush to the
rescue after a long afternoon of guzzling Ginger Ale, and placing
fast bets on Old Maids.
... and again...
Meanwhile, back at the saloon.
The boys are at their nightly
brawl in the middle of the dance
floor when all of a sudden all
eyes are focused on the swing
ing doors. A dog howls, a bat
hoots, an Ooron moorons, and
then in comes that handsome,
muscle-bound, sweet-voiced, fast-
drawing, Roman warrior, Rob
Land. (Gee)
Rob approaches the bar and
says, “Gib me a Rue Blibbon,
uh-uh-uh I mean Blue Ribbon.”
Now Rob pulls out his Donald
Duck Beginners mug and fills it
up. Gulp! Halp! Someone revive
Land. “Has anerbody seen ma
Ho to Gell Hat?”
A few hours later, the fearless
Rob Land has heard about the
buzzardly scheme of Oil Can
Shred Farkey. Immediately he
heads straight for SSS’s shack
where Shred is about to confis
cate Flippity Flirt Flossie as a
downpayment on SSS’s rent. KA
PLAM!! “Here I come to save
the day, that means that big Rob
Land is on his way!” Land is
here. In he dashes and up to
Shred he bolts, and in a mighty
monstrous mouse’s voice he
screams, “Enie menie minie moe,
I know where Shred can go!”
“Heeeeee, Hoooooo, haaaaaa,
weeeeee, woooooo. Rob, you’re
an honest to goodness tou^ fel
ler,” shrieks Farkey. And just
now he makes a mad dash for
the door with Flossie under his
arm.
“Never fear,” cries Rob. “My
trusty bosom buddy is at hand.”
And just who do you think
comes staggering in but that jolly
Hinson's Florist
Albemarle, N. C.
9824086
MOOSE'S
Fashions Of
Quality For
Young Ladies
and
Young Men
North Second St.
old Hardee hat rack, Charlie
Taylor, or rather sugar lips’
“Come on Lips,” cries Land as
he makes his way to the exit on
the left of the stage. “We got
to save Floss.’’
Now the mad dash is on. Shred
heads to the saw mill, Land and
Lips cut him off. To the lumber
shoot! Curses!” Now Oil Can
heads to his last resort, the train
tracks. Shred ties Floss to the
rails, runs and jumps into the
train, blows the whistle and then
builds up steam as he heads
down the track, straight for
Floss, and then . . . and then . . .
Meanwhile Lips and Land are
resting on a rock. But off in a
distance they hear a scream and
they race to the rescue of dear
Floss. Closer and closer they
come to the tracks and just as
fast. Shred whistles along in his
track toddler. )%*$)’%‘&(ii)’/(:
&*+-^%®/:*»?$!(&‘::%* ?!$)(
When the smoke cleared, any
witness could have seen plainly
what had happened. There on
the track was an arm and a leg
and an arm and a leg and a
head and a neck and a nose and
an ear and another ear. And
running down the track free as
a lark is “FARKEY DAY GOOD
IES FOR FARKEY, YA, HA
52 FOOD
MARKET
FRUIT
VEGETABLES
MEAT PRODUCE
982-4927
Rt. 52
Albemarle, N. C.
Julia's
Viewpoint
I am looking forward to spend
ing Easter in the United States
and I know that there will be
many experiences. In Greece, we
go out of school for Easter vaca
tions for 15 days and there are
many customs during the Passion
Week, the week before Easter.
Passion Week is the climax of the
Greek holy year. The Greeks ob
serve fast in the days before
Easter. Thursday before Easter
is the special day for housewives
to dye eggs, usually in red color.
Toward midnight on Saturday the
whole community assembles in
and around the church, all bring
ing unlighted white candles. Some
minutes, before midnight, the
priest goes out of the door and
mounts a platform under the
stars. There he reads from the
Gospel and then he says, “Come,
ye, partake of the never-setting
light!” The clear flames dance
and spread out, passing from
candle to candle until every candle
in tne crowd is light. Finally, mid
night comes and the priest cries
out “Christos Anesti!” which
means “Christ is Risen!” Sud
denly every church bell and ship’s
siren in the whole of Greece rings
forth. At the same moment you
see many fireworks in the sky
and the p>eople embrace each oth
er repeating and repeating “ChristJ
os Anesti!" That is a very ex
citing and thrilling moment. Eas
ter day is a day tor everybody to
be happy and there is a custom
for all the people to eat Iamb
on that day and all the relatives
of the family to gather together.
While they wait tor the lamb to
get done they dance folk dances
singing all together folk songs. It
is true that every country has its
own way of celebrating Easter
and I am looking forward to learn
ing the American customs for
Easter. It is going to be an ex
perience for me.
HIRAM'S
FLORIST
Of Albemarle
Complete Home
Furnishings
SUGG'S
FURNITURE
COMPANY
Concord Road
Albemarle, N. C.
DIAL 982-7113
First National Bank
COL. BANKMORE SAYS:
"Drive saiely . . .
your life is your
greatest investment"