Newspapers / Highlands High School Student … / Oct. 27, 1961, edition 1 / Page 10
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October 27. 1961 the MODNTATN ^RaIL -Pagp> 8 i Two goats were walking up an alley behind working on last week the script called a movie theater when one of them spied some old films lying on the ground. He ate a few of the films. The second goat asked, ”How*d you like them?»» With that the first goat replied, "Liked the book better.” ’’Pop, is it true that history repeats itself?” ”It sure is Junior, and evi^ry time it does the price goes upi" Today we use 300 horsepower to move a l^O-lb, man one block to purchase a one ounce package of cigerettes complete with filter tips so he won’t know he’s smoking. Hillbilly Jim had reported for a job at the defense plant. ’’What can you do?” the foreman asked, for me to rush out and sprinkle catsup over an actor who was supposed to have been shot. Unfortunately, a camera caught me pouting the catsup on the act or,” "Terrible,” the British executive exclaim ed. ”What did you do?” "“What did I do?” the stagehand replied# ”I ate himj” A Beatnik lived in a room with just a bed and chair. One night a friend happen ed in and seeing two magazines lying on the floor, asked, ’’Whatja do man, hire a decorator?” As I started my first round of hospital calls on our ailing church members, I reminded myself to speak encouragley to each patient. My first visit was to an elderly woman who was sitting up in bed and looking so well I was sure she would "Mister," said Jim, ”there ain’t noth- be dismissed form the hospital soon, ing I can’t do,” Cheerily I began, ”Well, you don*t look ’’Well,” said the foreman, ”is that soj as if you’ll be here much longer,” Could you wheel a barrel of smoke??* the distraught just fill it up for me, Daffynishison: Pasteurize - Faster than the eye can see, ’’Looks like the Flood,” observed the man to the waitress, ”The what?” ”The Flood, You know, when Noah saved the animals on the ark. You must have read about that,” ’’Mister, on account of all this rain, I ain’t seen a paper in four days," Gossip always travels faster over sour grapevines. mother shouted on the phone, "Junior has j ust swallowed my ballpoint peni” ”Don»t worry, I’ll be right over,” the doctor told her, "But what’ll I do until you get here?” "Use a pencil,.” ”Don»t you just love our dog?” the host ess gushed, ”He’s just like one of the family.” And the bored guest asked, ”0h? Which one? ”Pop, what’s an executive?” ”An executive, Junior, is a man employed to talk to visitors so the other employees will have a chance to work,” o i r executive was questioning Doctor: "You need not worry, sir. You're a stagehand about the perfect techniques as good a shape as a man of 60." nSu “ c°>wtry. Patient: "Yeah, Doo, but I'm only W " "That’S because mistakes are not tol- ^ ^ ^ erated. For instance, in a show I was
Highlands High School Student Newspaper
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Oct. 27, 1961, edition 1
10
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