Newspapers / Meredith College Student Newspaper / April 1, 1949, edition 1 / Page 2
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Page Two THE TWIG April 1, 1949 PERSONALLY YERS By Nosey B. Careful Miss Edith Pratt, assistant dean of angels, has recently been devoting much of her spare time to elocution lessons under the co direction of Elsie Corbett and Betty Penny, masters of the southern dialect. Meredith is grieving the loss of one of its most beloved faculty members. Dr. Mary Lynch John son, who has resigned her posi tion. Incidentally, Woolworth’s is a more efficient place. From the bursar’s office comes this item: a pack of notebook paper from the Bee Hive will now contain ten pieces of paper instead of nine. Mrs. Vera Tart Marsh has placed a suggestion box in John son Hall for the convenience of all students who wish to express opinions or comments on their class attendance record. Dean L. A. Peacock has changed his dean’s list rating as follows: “Any student who manages to pull through two courses can qualify.” This new step is thought to allow at least five more students to be placed on the honor roll. Miss Phyllis Cunningham has been taken before the Student Government Council to clarify her recent motive in visiting a j certain Wake Forest “home.” Students are requested not to pluck daisies and stinkweeds from the faculty garden. Miss Glover K. Clover is on campus today interviewing Meredith girls to find out if they are interested in establishing a blind date bureau. Those who are interested please meet in Dr. Campbell’s office at 5:00 p.m. this afternoon. The Bee Hive is holding a sale of Christmas cards. Get yours early and save! Pine Tar soap and false eyelashes are also being offered at special prices. Mr. A1 Capp is supposed to ar rive on campus tomorrow morn ing for the regular chapel period at 10:30 a.m. His topic will be “The Shmoo Must Live On.” All art students will meet to morrow to go on a field trip to the Bee Hive and surrounding land marks. Sketching and eras ing will be done. Sociology students will be in terested in this item—Mr. T. R. Rockweed has been engaged to speak on “The Effectiveness of Using ‘By and Large’ in your Conversation.” VISITING LECTURER Mr. Dilly Picklepuss Classrooms To Improve Administration Decides To Stumble Last Mile In Giving Students Best Although present classrooms are modern in style and conven ience, the administration has decided to go another mile by adding a few more items of com forts. Each room will be equipped with a box of mortar to stop up cracks in the wall as well as in the floor. New corks will be purchased to stuff into the numerous rat holes. These will be decorated by the art depart ment with the names of each individual rodent’s name im printed. Orders may be placed with Mr. Reynolds and his slaves now. Faculty members have agreed to help with the window situa tion by wearing pink petunias if they are fresh air fiends or purple pansies if they prefer no air at all except the hot breath of the students. Each room will contain a cot for those who can not stay awake during the lectures. Reservations must be made two months ahead of time. Another improvement will be the installation of loudspeakers to play soft music in the back ground of lectures, so that students who cannot be put to sleep by their professors may have an added help. A final alteration to be made is the changing of the water fountain into a lemonade cooler. All students may receive free lemonade without sugar or water in between classes. The administration hopes that these small changes will succeed in making the Meredith College campus the most “ultra ultra” in North Carolina. STUDENT UPRISE DUE TO LECTURE On March 29, the students of Meredith College conducted an all day demonstration in the courtyard. The angry students paraded for ten hours, even re fusing to eat! The uprising was caused by the fact that they were refused admittance into the auditorium due to inadequate seating ca pacity for the lecture on “Nu clear Fission” by an eminent scientist. The office of the Dean of Women has decided that one way of coping with the situation is to have future lectures require an evening privilege. If funds can be raised, special radio sets will be installed in the social rooms of all dorms. The lecture committee, at first startled by the confusion, has changed into a delighted group because of the interest shown by the student body in these friend ly chats. In fact, so pleased were they that plans are underway to have three lectures a week. Up to date such subjects as “Is the Ascaris Becoming Antiquated?” The Importance of Knowing Egyptian in Newspaper Work,” and "The Lowly Woirm—His Life and Woirk” have been se lected for future lectures. UNSOLVED ART MYSTERY Mr. Douglas W. Reynolds, head of the Meredith College art department announced today that the prowlers who have been attempting to break the lock in his private “studio” may just as well give up. After a visit to a product of his alma mater—the Yale Lock Company, he has finally secured a lock that is ABSOLUTELY unbreakable. The windows to the studio have Railway Companies To Remove Tracks The Southern and Seaboard Railway Companies in a joint meeting of representatives from State and Meredith Colleges have finally come to friendly terms over recent complaints. After heated discussions and arguments, they have kindly consented to move their railroad tracks to the opposite side of town in order to eliminate the disturbing clamor which now prevails on both campuses. The present railroad tracks have been turned over to the State College Engineering De partment which will erect a highway for motor scooters. Ano;el Farm Best o For State College Meredith College was fortun ate in having Dr. C. A. Klepto- maim, outstanding authority on the State College man — his haunts and habits, as its guest lecturer on March 30. The visit ing speaker’s topic was “Utopia Reached by Dating Meredith Angels.” An excerpt from his illustrious, unforgettable speech is reprinted below: “We all State men prefer you all Meredith angels two to one because you are so mellow, mild and understanding. Some col lege men like to date social flutterbys, but State College men —we stand for the homely type! Each man on our campus has a special spot in his black heart for you girls—from the lowest digging Agriculture student to the loftiest ceramics genius with blue eyes. “In the past we have stood for fine, upstanding, skinny and fat women, and we want you to know that we appreciate your having to be in at an early hour because we always hit the sack (pardon my slang — environ ment, you know) when the cows cease to moo. We also like the way your rules allow you to be dressed, for we are never seen without a tie or shirt on our spacious campus. “Another reason we State Col lege men place you above any other girls on our list of favorites is your genuine interest in our education. We often ponder over the many pleasant hours spent in discussing such important sub jects as ‘Why the Velocity of Eons Cause the Exertion of Ex- tranomical Energy.’ Never have we witnessed such excited, eager looks in eyes like yours at the mention of so interesting a topic. “In closing, I should like to impart this little gem of a quo tation from our outstanding lit erary magazine. The Wataugan which says, ‘Yes, when all is said and done, Meredith College and its brood of wingless cher ubs have definitely stolen our hearts.’ I thank you, ladies.” Dr. Kleptomain was escorted back to the State College campus by the Meredith student body, who remained to pay their re spects to “all these wonderful boys.” CLUBS AND SPEARS HOOFPRINT CLUB Last week’s meeting was held to elect three members to repre sent the Meredith stables at the Kentucky Derby. Star rider Miss Ann Cannady will be riding the spirited steed Dollie in the Tennessee walking class. Al though instructor Feggy White is a firm believer that overriding should be avoided at all times, a deviation was made in this case. COLTON ENGLISH CLUB At their annual banquet held at Walgreen’s club members were delighted to hear the English faculty discuss the un- paralied achievements of poet Edgar A. Guest. During the business session, a motion was passed to offer a course in the poetic works of Guest, replacing now the outmoded study oi Homer’s Odyssey. ALPHA RHO TAU Since the previous meetings had been devoted to fun and frolic, the club members planned that their April meeting be solely concerned with aesthetic considerations. In line with this more serious attitude, the mem bers finally yielded to the pleading of Mr. Reynolds that he be allowed to expound on the glories of Norman Rockwell, ot whom he is a devoted student and an ardent admirer. CANNADY MATH CLUB This month’s meeting will find Dr. Cannady climbing the water tower with a slide rule in one hand and a pair of water wings in the other to prove to the club members that the Pythagorean theorem is unsurpassed. New members are advised not to pay dues until after the experiment has been held. TOMORROW’S BUSINESS WOMEN A joint club meeting was held last week with Yesterday’s Business Men to discuss prob lems old and new. Among the topics were “Do You Think the Movies Will Replace Marriage?” and “Should We Re-adopt the Alphabet in Our Filing System?” STUDENT LEAGUE OF WOMEN VOTERS Newest project of the club is to get universal womanhood suffrage. Miss J. Pettibone Mc- Gillicutt was awarded the prize for the most comprehensive question of the evening— “Should We Admit to the General Public that Men Are Almost Our Equal?” After the business meeting, the ladies were served fillet of sardine and crumpets. GRANDDAUGHTER’S CLUB The meeting was opened by an interesting discussion entitled “How Mother Managed to Snare a State Man Single-handed.” It was decided that for the next needlework project, collapsible crocheted hats would be made. EYE SPECIALIST REVEALS FACTS Famous eye specialist C. W. Webb from New York, during a recent trip through the South made a tour of the Meredith Campus accompanied by several members of the faculty. The good man emerged from the classroom horrified at the blind ing illumination that he found within. Said Dr. Webb, “Quick, friends, my eye balm.” In a voice tremulous with righteous indignation, this noted oculist asserted that light filters must be installed immediately. The administration, conside- rating this inconvenience, de cided upon another plan to which the specialist agreed. All students are requested to stop by Mrs. Marsh’s office at the begin ning of the week to be measured for their green glasses. been boarded up so that mother nature may not have the benefit of viewing his work either. In closing, Mr. Reynolds left these parting words to his listener. “What I keep in that room is my business, and I wish to have no further interference ' with my property.” ITEM OF INTEREST The bi-annual meeting of the Southern Lynching Society will meet tomorrow at sundown to “Dispose” of your editors, who are fated to meet their doom. Any contributions to the fund to purchase a good grade of sticky North Caro lina tar and peacock feathers for the victims will be appreciated. Address your comments on this paper — also your sympathy cards to: Editor—MRJ Ass’t Ed—DLW and BJH Padded cells of Vann Dorm Breakfast Attire Changed By Faculty Miss Lu will beam her smile of satisfaction tomorrow morn ing as results of the new ruling about breakfast dress go into effect. This bill was painfully slow in obtaining the approval of the Student Government Council and the student body, but our sympathy for faculty wishes students courteously acceptec the ultimatum. The new ruling states that all students must attend the morn ing meal attired in pajamas robe, bedroom slippers and hair- curlers (the robe is not com pulsory ). Student Council mem bers will be stationed at the doors for careful inspection. Breakfast will be served family style from eight until ten. It is this last provision to which the students objects with such vigor, for they felt that such indolence will go contrary to their nature. n ALLOPING VjrADABOUT By Gettum Dirt This week’s campus wide question is “Which Fraternity Do You Prefer and Why?” Many students seemed to be rather reluctant to answer, but your faithful reporter, Gettum Dirt, managed to choke it out of them. The following results have been tabluated as a result of the survey: Cappa Alpho 36% Alpha Rho Tau 1% Cigma Pie Epsielon 16'/(' Kappa New Cigma 1% Cigma Ki (te) 21% Cigma Pie Alpho 1 % Fi Baita Cappa 12%; Reasons for preferring the various fraternities were many and diversified. Most of the freshman made their choices because we know some nice boys in them.” Sophomores stated that “our preference is due to the wholesome recreation provided by the boys.” Juniors refused to make any general comment, while seniors boldy said, “They got what we want.” The Night . . . Has a Thousand Eyes Due to the crowded conditions on the ramshackled breeze-ways between the dorms, Meredith College students will be per mitted to take sunbaths on the campus after 6:00 p.m. This plan won wide acclaim since it is a proven assumption that the ultra-violet rays are not so vicious at these hours of the day. COMMUNIST PARTY (Continued from page one) meeting on Johnson Hall steps, 9:00-2:00 p.m. parade led by CENSORED from Cary to Wen dell with a snack taken at Wal green’s, 2:00-6:00 p.m. short speech by Dr. Hotevok, 6:00- 6:05 p.m. steak supper on the roof of the Hut, 6:05-9:00 p.m. mass meeting on second floor of the Bee Hive, 9:00-2:00 further entertainment of the visitors.
Meredith College Student Newspaper
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April 1, 1949, edition 1
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