December 6,1995
Campus Health
11
Making the choice: A story about alcoholism
For years the fields of psychiatry
and psychology have claimed depres
sion as the most common mental disor
der in America, but recently “A Na
tional institute of Mental Health study
reveals that alcohol abuse and depen
dence is the most common disorder,
affecting 13.6 percent of the popula
tion”, according to James Zanden in
Human Development.
This estimate is probably low con
sidering the feet that many people who
drink to excess do not admit to their
alcoholic tendencies.
Some people like myself who rec
ognize that they have a problem with
alcohol try various ways to either con
trol or quit drinking; the two most
common choices are to try to stop
drinking on one’s own or to join the
twelve step program of Alcoholics’
Anonymous. The differences between
these two choices are quite apparent;
the results are either success or failure
in both scenarios. Many people, 1 am
sure, can effectively stop drinking by
relying on their own will power, but
for many alcoholics Alcoholics’ Anony-
.mous is the only successful way to stop
from picking up the first drink.
The struggle to not take the first
drink is an extremely exhausting effort
for an alcoholic; the decision to stay
sober has to be made on a daily basis.
Alcoholism is an allergy; the chapter
“The Doctors Opinion” in the book
Alcoholics Anonymous states, “the
phenomenon of craving is limited to
this class and never occurs in the aver
age temperate drinker”.
In the past few years I have tried to
quit drinking on my own several times
and have been successful—for a couple
of months. Typically these periods of
respite only acted as confirmation that
1 did not have a drinking problem; as
soon as the next stressful situation
arose I would be back to my old drink
ing patterns. Sometimes I could con
trol myself and have only one or two
drinks, but as an alcoholic every time I
picked up the first drink I was in jeop
ardy of triggering the allergy that would
not allow me to stop until I passed out.
Typically, as stated in Alcoholics
Anonymous, “once he takes any alco
hol whatever into his system some
thing happens, both in the bodily and
mental sense, which makes it virtually
impossible for him to stop”. The mind
of an alcoholic has a baffling way of
denying the actuality of the disease
with little effort. Therefore, stopping
on our own is often impossible.
The program of A.A. provides daily
meetings for the alcoholic to attend.
These meetings act as a constant re
minder that I am an alcoholic; this
reminder makes it much more difficult
to accept any form of denial that is so
easily found when I have tried to stay
sober on my own.
Other alcoholics in A.A. act as re
minders when they share their past
experiences in meetings, but just as
important they are a support that I did
not have when I quit drinking on my
own. I, like many alcoholics, have felt
alone most of my life. The fear that I
was the only person that was experi
encing the isolation, the anger and the
guilt that is so common in this disease
was overwhelming at times, so I would
just drink more. With the support avail
able in Alcoholics Anonymous I came
to realize that I was not alone; there are
millions of people who share these
same feelings. And with the program I
do not have to be alone in my struggle
to stay sober. The problem that I faced
in trying to quit drinking relying solely
on my own will power was that there
was no one to talk to that understood
what I was going through; the loneli
ness I felt cut through me with icy
precision. The pain of loneliness would
become so unbearable that I would
give into my disease because at least
when I drank I had a friend—alcohol.
- Unlike staying sober on one’sown,
the A.A. program gives people sup
port, friendship and love that a loner
does not have; most importantly “They
give life to their members—frequently
a richer, healthier life than those people
knew before...”, as said by Melody
Beattie in Codependent No More .
Through the twelve steps 1 have found
a higher power to fill my emptiness
and to give me the courage to pursue
my life’s dreams.
When I quit on my own, I experi
enced what the program calls a dry
drunk. I was not drinking, but I contin
ued to convulse with pain and guilt; I
had no idea that there was any other
way to deal with these feelings except
to drown them with alcohol. The pro
gram allows me to grow and overcome
character defects that have had a hold
on me since I began to drink; as a dry
drunk I was stagnating in my own
misery.
The drinking alcoholic is in con
stant anguish even if he or she is not
able to admit it. The first step I had to
take as an alcoholic was to acknowl
edge that I was powerless over alcohol
and realize that the alcohol had made
my life unmanageable. The drinks were
no longer numbing the pain, so taking
this step and finding the help offered
by Alcoholics Anonymous has enabled
me to achieve eight months of sobri
ety; these eight months have been the
happiest time of my entire life.
Some alcoholics have the will
power to overcome this disease on
their own, but the numbers do not
support this as the best choice. A psy
chiatrist, Dr. G. Kirby Collier, stated in
Alcoholics Anonymous that A.A. “can
prove a recovery rate of 50% to 60%... ”,
these figures are unmatched by any
other methods alcoholics have been
known to try. I have tried both ways of
quitting drinking and by far the happi
est and healthiest way is with the help
of Alcoholics Anonymous.
MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY
NEW YEAR FROM THE HERALD
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