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T H E MASONIC^ J O U R N A J. .
Fooling the Young Men,
Term was over, thu “Defiance” coach
■'vas full of iiuJerjraJuates returning to
their respective colleges the day was cold,
Avet and miseiable, when a well appoint
ed dray drove up to the White Horse
h’ellar, Piccadilly, “Have you room for
one inside to Oxford ?” asked as pretty a
girl as you would wish to see on a sum-
mefb day. “ What i be.auty !’ exclaim-d
pie. Q nte lovely !'■ said anothe.-. “Pe.’-
feet!” lisped a tnird. “Quite f ll, Miss,”
replied the coachman, “in.side and out ”
“Surely you could make room ior one,”
persevered the fair applicant. Quite im-
]-,ossible. Miss, without the gentlemen’s
consent.” “Lots of room ” cried the in
sides. “We are not very large ; we can
manage to take one more,” “If the
'.'oung gentlemen consent, ' said the driv
er, who was one of the best tempered
fellows on eai th and as honest as Aris
tides, “I have no objection." “We agree”
said the in,side quartet. “All right,” re
sponded the driver. The fare was paid,
and the. guard proceeded to open the door
and let down the steps. “Now, Miss, if
von- please, we are behind our time.”
“Come along, grandfather,” cried the
damsel, addre.ssing a most respeotable-
iooking. portly elderly gentle.nan, ‘ the
money is paid, get in, and be sure you
thank the young gentlemen,” at the same
time suiting the action to the word, and
with a wicked smile assisted her respected
grandfather into the coach. “Ilere’.i
some mistake ; you' 11 squeeze us to death,'
cried the astonished party. But at this
moment “All right,” “Sit fast,” was
heard, and away rattled the “Defiance,”
at its best pace, drowning the voices of
the crestfallen Oxonians.
We are Brothers All,
W'hat a cheerful little home this world
would prove to us if we could only agree,
and, whether residents of a palace or cot
tage, would acknowledge the fraternal
relationship we bear to each otlier.
There is no reason why we should quar
rel ; seeing that concord produces so
much real happiness, 'tis surely the best
way when we meet, to meet as brothers
all. My coat may be coarse, and yours
line ; you may drink wine, and I water ;
but both of us can show a true, unspotted
heart, and we are brothers all. You
would despise the rough and unfaithful
one ; having truth on your side, you
would stand firm as a rook ; so would I—
and thus we are brothers all.
You would scorn to do falsely by man
or woman ; I always hold to the right and
do as well as I know how ; and thus in
our joys and our affections, and in every
thing else that is good, we are- brothers
all.
Your mother loved you as only a moth
er can love ; my mother did for me what
none but a mother can do ; there is but
one of us at last, whether high or low, for
v,-e are brothers all.
Old age. frail and trembling, will soon
come over us both ; death will creep
along after him, and summon us both
away ; then into the same graveyard we
.shall both be bo,ne. Co)*e, neighbors,
your hands here—we are brothers all.
The Grange Means Peace.
in. a late circular the execu'ive com-
mitteo. of the Missouri State Gi’ange very
truthfully say :
“There are many professional and trad
ing men, and even some of onr own breth
ren, who seem to think-tbal the mission
of the Grange is to fight everything and
'•verbody. Never was there a greater
mistake. If any body of men on earth
mean “peace on earjh, and good will to
men,” it is the Grangers. We desire ilie
prosperity of all good men. We have
no antagonism to any honest c.alhng trade
or profession. We want all to flouri.sh
a id prosper, but we do not want them to
be onr master.^. M bile other trades and
professions are prospering, we want the
farmers to prosper also. We want the
“man who holds the bread” to reap the
fruits of bis own labor, and not to have
them go mainly into the pockets ot the
drone,s of society.
We want agriculture to flouri.sh and
the tillers of the soil to be elevated finan
cially, socially and educationally. Ard
why should we not try to build up oiir-
selve.s, if we do not aim to pull down any
body else who ought to prosper? There
is no agrarian sm in the grange. .Every
p.atron wants all the propierty he can get
honestly bj- hi-s toil.
We do not wish to injure tlie lawyers,
though one of our cardinal doctrine.s takes
away a great source of their profit.
One of our proiide.st achievrnent.s i.s to
stop .strife and lawsuits among fanners.
Where grangers flourish .awsuits diiriin
ish, and the little breaches th.it arise be
tween brethren are healed without liti'
gation.
with the conceited rainbow, he quietly
smiled. Then, hiding his beam.s in the
clouds, he concealed himself tor
an 111-
stant, and the rainbow also disappeared.
Persons whoare vain and iingratetul for
get whose hands it is that has made them
jirosperoiKs. Is it not just that He in His
turn.should drv up the sources of theii
prOBperit >• ?
An Editor of 1775.
In 1775 tliet-e were four newspapers
publislied in New 'tork. Hivington s
Jioi/a/. Gazritcer was tiie siib.servierit tool
of the British aiuliurilies The 3Jcrcur)j,
published by Hugh Gaine, was a time
server and trimmer. Anderson s Vm-
sfitulional Gazette was born and died in
1775, and had no it fluence whatever.
77/e j\’ew York Journal. )iublished by
John Holt, was thestiiidy and uiipiir-
ciiasable organ of the Sons of Liberty.
Its editor tied the city after tlie disas
trous battle on Long Island, and lie was
heard of afterward as publi.shing hi.s pa
per at one and another of the towns on
the Hudson uiid.er circumstances that
would have appalled a less determined
man. In the month of August, 1,777
while at Esopiis, he printed an advertise
ment, in which he proposed to take any
Ifiml t'fcountry produce in the way of
tiade-
llis prospectus read.s verv qu.iiiitiv :
A pa nful tratioe-action—
gfittillo
of bed ill one's sleep, and walking!’"'
a third story window. °
Never take ycur Christianity
Christians, but ask yourself,
the Lord have me act?” and follow^™
When Simpkins died, he died poo- i
though he left three hundred thon’A
dollars. None of it belonged to him !
An old convict’s advice to his tor
"Never steal a horse, aiy boy, unigjj p
is faster than any other horse in n'
neighborhood.”
Why is a glazierin danger ofhecomiB,
intemperafe ? Because he must alwan
have his glass before he can begin lij
day's work.
A cur-tailed dog means, of course ado
with his tail cut short. But all dogsjt'
curtailed without regard to the
their tails.
,-l
N.vpoleon's Happiest Day.--When
N.apoleon was in the he’ght of his pros
perity, and surrounded by a brilliant
company of the marshals and courtier.s of
the empire, he was asked what day lie i “And the pniiter, being unable to carry
considered to have been the happiest of 1 on his business without the necessaries
his life. When all e.xptcted that he i of life, is obliged to affix the followina
would name theoccasioii of some glorious j prices to Ins wurs-, viz : For a qiiartir of
victory, or some great political triumph. ! new.s,twelve [miiiuIs of beef, pork, or veal,
oraome august celebration, or other sig- I or mutton, or four pounds ot butter, or
nal recognition of his genius and powei he
answered without a moment's hesitation,
“The happies day of my life was the day
of my first communion.” At a a reply so
unforseen there was a general s leiice ;
whet, he added, as if to him,self, “I was
then an innocent child.” ^
A Strange Meeting.
The railroad convention in this citv
was remaikable fora personal juxtaposi
tion, the like of which could not pioba-
bly have been presented anywhere el.te
in the world. It was the presence in the
same hall of four very distinguished per-
.sonages each of whom had piayed a lead
ing part in what will be recognized as
one of the most important historical dra
mas of modern times. There wa«
Jefferson Davis, ex-President of the Con
federate States, first and last civil head of
that formiduble revolution; there was
Beauregard, who opened the war at Fort
Sumter, and there was Sherman and
Johnson who in addition to making their
marks in it, closed it at Durham station
in North Carolina. Three of these, the
Confederate ex-President and the two ei-
Confederale generals were modest dele
gates in the convention, representing
Mississippi, Georgia and Louisiana. Sher
man was a looker on. The convention
called the three generals to the platform
as honored members, and when they met,
Sherman, Johnston and Beauregard shook
hands in the presence of the body, the re
port says the enthusiasm reached its cli
max ; gentlemen rose in their seats, wav
ed their hats wildly and cheered till ex
hausted. It was an accidental centennial
picture of striking and impressive effect.
—Gt. Louis Itepublican.
seven jionnds of cliee.ie, or eighteen
jioiiiid.s of line flour, or lialf a bushel of
wheat, or one i,u.-liel of Indian corn, or
hall a col d ot wood, or 30t) vvt. of hav, or
ultier articles ot country produce as lie
.sliail want them, in like propurtio’’5. or
as niiicli money as will purchase them at
the tune; for otiier articles of printing
work, the price.s to be in proportion to
t'lip of the new.-paper. Alibis custom
ers, wlio liave to spare any of tlie above,
or otlier articles of country produce, he
hopes will let liini know it, and afford
him the necessary supplies, without
which hi.s bii.sitie.ss here must very soon
be di.scontiniied" it ts gratifying to be
able to slate that the sturdy patriot sur
vived tfie Revolution, and lived to revis
it the city, of which he had been jiost-
master in 1775. His patriotic labors and
sufferings justly entitled him to the fo!
lowing epitaph : "A due tribute to the
memory of John Holt, printer to this
State, i native of Virginia, wlio patiently
obeyed death's awful summons on the
A triend stepped in to pity a neiglkt
whose wife had run away. “IVliat ajj
you pitying me for?” snarled the neigh i
bor : “she hasn't come back 1”
An affectionate lather in Michigan
who believes in moral suasion, keepj i|
rawhide hanging in his boy’s rooiii, oio
which is inscribed, “Honor thy parenli
Said a fop to a young lady, “'Whyisit,
do you suppose, th.at whea I have a ccU
it aiway.ssettles in my head?” “Perlupt;
it is because uatura abhors avaeviim"
was the reply.
A young man asked his bachelor ti
de ; “’W hat advice would you givetoi
young man who was contempiating im;
niony ?” “I should advise him to ketf
on coatemplating it.”
“It seems to me,” said a l.ankeratSa:
atoga to a belle, “that you ladies areti
way.s desperately fond of officers.” "Isil
at ail strange,” retorted the lielle, "thi
a lady should like an offer, sir?''
Says a scientific authority—“Thexist
croji of France this year would fill i
ditch three and a half feet wide threeati
a half feet deep, ai.d 4,000 miles long,”
A widow near Boston, who hasbiiriel
three husbands, wants to marry agaii,
and as a recommendation, shows a IrooB
that she has used fourteen years, wliick
has no dents on the handle.
A Connecticut gentleman, on being it-
troduced to a newly married man, iito
had found his wife in the niifmeg Statt,
congratulated him warmly, saying:
“These Connecticut gins make axccllenl
wives, I’ve had four of’em.”
A darkey who was stooping to tvast
his hands in a creek, didn't notice tie
A Franklin (Pa.) congregation recent
ly announced its intention to add ^200 to
the pastor’s salary for each child born in
fits family during his ministrations there
the result was—twins, and the society
lias rescinded its resolution.
thirtietii of January, 1784, in the si-xtv-
fourth year of his age. To say that his j actions of a goat just behind him.
family lamest him, is needless; that his Lg when he scrambled out of the water
.liends bewail him, is u.seless ; that all ; w'as asked how it liappened, he an-
regi ethim,unneoessary ; forthatheiner- swered : “I dunno 'zactlv ; but ’
ited every esteem is certain. The ton
gue of slander cannot any less, though jus
tice might say mure,” Such an eiJtaph
inscribed over the dust of an editor, who
had also held a commission as postmaster
open a wide field of emulation r,o the
journalists and officials of these latter
day.—Scrihicrs for January.
The Rainbow ard the Sun.—A very i
beaut.ful rainbow was lighting up the | The following is said to be a neverfail
clouds; everyone who saw admired it, : ing cure for earache : Take a bit of cotton
and .so much praise made it vain. “I am
hand.soraer than the sun,” it exclaimed ;
“for, bright as he is, he has only one col-
or, and I have so many.” The sun heard
this, and, without entering into.a dispute
batting, put upon it a pinch of black pep
per, gather it up and tie it, dip it in
sweet oil, and insert it into the ear. Put
a flannel bandage over the head to keep
it warm. It will give immediate relief.
as ef de shore kinder h’isted and frowel
me.”
Every day is a little life; and our
whole life is but a day repeated.—Aiil
hence it is that Jaocb numbers his lifetf
days, and Moses desired to be taught
point of holy arithmatic, “to number not
his years, but his days, and these so ash
apply his heart unto wisdom.''—Those,
therefore, that dare lose a day. are dan
gerously prodigal; and that dare nii'
spend it, desperate.
Wedding serenades are out of fa.shion.
The good old days when windows
smashed and houses tipped over lo exptesi
joy have fled forever.
What with stocking darners, knittinj
and sewing machines, apple-parers, wash
ers and wringers, woman as a necesstt/i*
fading from the face of the earth,