Page Two
THE HILLTOP, MARS HILL COLLEGE, MARS HILL, N. C.
November 4, 1961
Novem]
Sizing Up Religious
Ventriloquism
In our current campus life, where the drive
to accumulate material things holds undisputed
sway in the lives of many, where the downward
pull of spiritual pride residts in the nonfull-
filment of human potentialities, and where gain
in quantity often appears to result in loss of
quality, it is obvious that the mind can become
obsessed with trivia, and that possibilities might
not emerge into expectations.
If we seek to gain insight into the jiresent
difficulties, we can discern that one of the main
problems is with religion and its orientation
to the present world. In our country where
religion plays a secondary role to technology,
and where many individuals are but religious
ventriloquists of an age gone by, seeking no re
ligious experience of their own; prophesying
“moral” perfection instead of divine perfection,
it is easy to see how some individuals become
mangled in this established order. A trip to
any mental institution will exemplify how
“meaningless religion” can function as a con
tributing factor to distorted minds and disap
pointments. Further, our immense dissatisfac
tion, lack of self confidence and initiative are
but reflections that we are deficient in internal
momentum. We need a remedy, but how shall
we go about obtaining it?
Our search for authenticity is one prescrip
tion, but the tragedy in this is that many of us
compromise with vagueness and matters of secon
dary importance. To be sure, no one can pos
sess truth in its entirety, but the deep need of
today seems to be for an individual to find
truth for himself and escape from the current
belief in standardized religious experiences.
Thomas wanted to believe, but he was not will
ing to believe allusions. He had to know the
truth for himself. At Mars Hill truth is espe
cially accessible, and even though the search
and acquirement of it can be painful, the end
result is always spiritually rewarding.
—David Crook
May Be Proclaimed
The joke that this is National Aardvark Week
may not be any joke at all. For instance, Oc
tober 9-15 was International Pizza Week and
October 16 has been set aside as Father-in-law
Day.
Other special events in October and Novem
ber are: National Macaroni Week, October 19-
28; National Pretzel Week, October 24-31; Na
tional Popcorn Week, October 24 - November
1; National Cooking With Butter Time, No
vember 1-30; Sour Cream Time, November 1-
30; Cat International Week, November 5-11;
and Youth Appreciation Week, November 13-
19.
Published by the Students of Mars Hill College
CThe Hilltop
Box 486-T. Mars HilL N. C.
Second-Class postage paid at Mars
^9- Hill, N. C. Published semi-monthly
during the college year.
PRESS
Volume XXXVI November 4. 1961 Number 4
STAFF
Editor ’N Chief Walt Whittaker
Advertising Gary Murdock, Franklin Calhoun
Circulation Ken Hunneycut, Roy Bower
News Editor John Grier
Editorial Page Dick Ergenbrlght
Feature Editor Thelma Taylor
Sports Editor John Baskin
Reporters Marietta Atkins, Dicky Glenn,
Janice Eiland, Bob Johnston, Don Andrews,
Roy Bower, Tina Stokes, Mimi Jones,
Pat Phelps, Mary Sue Mclntire, Allan Clark,
Cynthia Vann, Jerry Grant
Proofreader Pat Phelps
Typists Jo Wells, Joyce Craft
Exchange Jerry Lotz, Carolyn Riley
Faculty Advisor Walter Smith
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The Legend of Tommy Hawk
By ROY BOWER
Give-JJs-N0-Test Week
Barbering is one of the more
honorable occupations in the
world. During the Middle
Ages, barbers performed opera
tions as surgeons do today, in
addition to cutting hair. Yet,
like all other occupations, bar
bering is only as honorable as
those people who engage in it.
Such was the case of Tommy
Hawk, who became a notorious
amateur barber at Jupiter Val
ley University. He entered bar
bering while a student there in
order to earn some extra spend
ing money.
Now the story of how Tom
my Hawk became a barberous
barber took place in this way.
One day when the natives of
Clown Dormitory (where Tom
my lived) became restless, after
having cooked their housemoth
er in every way known to the
great witchdoctors all over the
uncivilized world. Tommy sug
gested that they open a barber
shop for college students.
Gil Becomes Barber
The first person to invest in
the new business venture was
Gil O’Teen, an Irish renegade
who had previously been voted
the Most Incompetent Surgeon
of the Year because he was un
able to cut anything decently.
It was not known why Gil de
cided to become an amateur
barber. He was descended from
a long line of lawyers and
judges. In fact, his great-great-
great - great - great - grandfather
presided at a famous series of
trials in Salem, Massachusetts in
the year 1692. Later, during
the last decade of the eighteenth
century, Gil’s great-grand uncle,
while presiding at a trial in
Paris, gave the defendant a very
short haircut — from the neck
up
The shop was organized in
Clown Dormitory (which then
became known as Clown Wig
wam) as the Scalp - Me - Quick
Salon of Barbering Unlimited,
when stockholders (who for the
most part were members of the
Mad-in-Sin Indian tribe and
residents of Clown Wigwam)
met and drew up a statement of
policy for the company. First,
there were to be two kinds of
haircuts that would be given
Students soon found that
they preferred to pay one hun
dred shekels for a permanent
treatment than to go to the vil
lage and pay one hundred twen
ty-five shekels for a temporary
treatment. However, after Tom
my and Gil finished with their
customers, most of them had to
wear a hat to reduce the glare
cast by their new, shiny domes—
that is, those customers who still
had a dome that shone. Un
fortunately, Gil’s customers
could not control themselves
and always lost their heads. An
Indian chief summed up the
operations of the salon in this
way, “Ugh!” When the shoj)
finally went out of business, be
cause of a shortage of customers,
Jupiter Valley University be
came known as Sleepy Hollow,
the Land of the Midnight Suns.
Barter Play Welcome
Departure in Lyceum
to customers. One was to be a
regular haircut with a scalp
treatment, complete with toma
hawk. The other was to be a
shorter haircut, developed first
by Napoleon en deLouse Tou-
scalp (Gil’s great-grand uncle),
for people who had mental
problems. Second, the price of
either haircut was to be one
hundred shekels.
Seldom does a change simply occur. The course
of history has not been a coup d’ etat of events,
rather it has been an evolution. We feel that
Mars Hill is now evolving from the stuffiness
and absurdity of the safe and the sane.
The Barter Theater’s great presentation of
“The Course of Love” is the source for our opti
mism. It was a production without eight-syllable
words; it was a production without a message of
justice and righteousness and truth and sincerity
— its message was simply one of entertainment.
The Hilltop commends the faculty members
responsible for the choice of the Barter Theater
as an addition to the lyceum series. We particu
larly commend and laud the members of the
Barter Group who made that Tuesday night a
memorable one indeed — it was a terrific ex
ample of talent and professional polish.
“The Course of Love” may very well prove
to be a stepping stone for our stride towards
becoming a truly “liberal” arts college. None
theless, it may also have been a stumbling block
in our movement towards becoming a senior col
lege.
A four year college must be ready to be a
four year college. It must have high ideas but
it must have enthusiastic students. One may
well wonder why so few' turned out to see a pfO"
fessional acting group. How' many other col
leges would have jumped at such a chance? Yet
the shame of it all is this: that when the Barter
Theater Group came to Mars Hill (enrollment
1104) it was greeted by less than 200 students!
This is not a favorable sign. Can we, in the
light of our progression towards senior college
status, afford to show such lack of enthusiasm
and such antagonism towards culture?
—WNW
Outer What?
Business at the salon began
after the greatest advertising
campaign since Little Bighorn.
The enthusiasm extended into
the beauty treatments which, in
their calmer moments, resem
bled the Spanish Inquisition.
First, the customer was tied to
a stake and, after building a
fire around him, Tommy would
recite the salon’s motto, a jubi
lant cry that transcended all
geological periods. Then the
customer was given the haircut-
scalp treatment combination. If
he desired the shorter haircut,
he was sent to the studio of Gil
O’Teen, where French was spok
en with an Irish accent. M.
Gilbert usually gave his custo
mers a special beverage, pro
duced at the University of
North Carolina, to calm their
nerves. The customer then re
laxed and lost everything that
troubled him and many things
that did not worry him at all.
Hats Reduce Glare
The question of recognition of Outer Mo^'
golia was put before the members of Congress-
In answer to whether or not we should recognise
Outer Mongolia, 40% answered “yes”, 40% a*'*'
wered “no” and 20% replied, “Outer what?”
The parallel of this fable is the Mars Hill Aim®
Mater. Since classes began in September,
one freshman has heard the school song.
chapel we sing, occasionally, “A Mighty Fortress
Is Our God” but never our Alma Mater.
football games we declare w'e have the T-E-A-^
on the B-E-A-M and yet we don’t have the scho^
S-O-N-G in the T-H-R-O-N G. This is not a
shortcoming of students, but of administrate^
planning. Must we take a survey and end t'P
with answers such as “Alma who?”
Play
Stay
It Cool--
in School
“Avoid the rush, flunk out now!” We niiff
ht
chuckle a little, but it is a tragic fact that soiH
of us seem to be follow'ing this advice.
Our purpose is not to preach to you on h‘’'|,
to study. Instead, w'e’ll try to illustrate in a w"
lines the “importance” of study. ^
Last night a good friend stopped by the J
and said good by — he was dropping out
school. He said it was just too hard and l
much studying. Several days before, anoth
student had told me he had so much work
do that he w'ould just like to throw all his boo^^*
out of the window. .
At this point the going seems especially toug.^j
In each class we attend it seems the teacher 'f'
never stop piling up the work, but this is v'bj.
separates the men from the boys — the
from the women. It is exactly why college
nates are in such demand in our modern gg
For example, the personnel manager of a
company in Virginia recently confided that
he sees, on a person’s application for empWj,
ment, that he is a college graduate, he
ately sees the applicant in a good light.
knows the applirant has had courage
to stick it out. This is the type of person
wants.
Yes, the going is tough. The teachers ‘
putting us to the test. Thev want to see n ,
can stick it out.” They are getting an exce*
view of us under pressure. Remember,
we graduate, our prospective employers p
check with Mars Hill to see how we heU*
under the strain. Better irlay it cool and stay
school.
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