CLOSS’S COLUMN
I was greatly surprised last week to behold the heading above mj
column. I had, with great care, drawn two beautiful Doric columns of
masterful proportions and exquisite workmanship. What was my sur
prise to find instead—two shepherds gazing toward a Star, surrounded
by their sheep, Norman columns, and ashlar masonry. It puzzled me
for a minute, until I understood that our Honorable Editor was trying
to tell my public that I was looking for the Light. I had thought maybe
he was making a sort of “Peace on earth” pun, or even that he wras
taking a subtle way of saying I was a perfect lamb. Or, I still think, it
might have been that he chose such a heading because I keep writing
Christmas stories this late in the year.
-o
He might as well stop making such references to my late Christmas
stories, because I've four or five more yet to run. At least I m still
wondering, for one thing, what Araminta Pierce’s friend did to satisfy
the small child who only wanted tw’o things for Christmas: “a real live
Mickey Mouse” in his stocking and “the real live Baby Jesus”. Person
ally, I think I’d rather furnish young Bennett Perry’s dog George with
a litter of puppies overnight than to try to fill that order.
-o
Clipping: (Scott Benton clipped it from the Elizabeth City Independent).
“A BUSINESS MAN TO HIS CREDITORS”
"In reply to your request to send a check, I wish to inform you that
the present condition of my bank account makes it impossible. My shat
tered financial condition is due to federal laws, state laws, county laws,
city laws, corporation laws, liquor laws, mother-in-laws, brother-in-laws,
sister-in-laws, and outlaws.
Through these taxes I am compelled to pay a business tax, amuse
ment tax, home tax, school tax, gas tax, light tax, water tax, sales tax,
carpet tax, income tax, food tax, furniture tax, and excise tax. I am re
quired to get a business license, truck license, not to mention marriage
license and dog license.
I am also required to contribute to every organization which the
genius of man is capable of bringing to life; to women’s relief, unem
ployment relief, and the gold digger’s relief. Also to every hospital and
charitable institution in the city, including the Red Cross, Black Cross,
Purple Cross, and Double Cross.
For my own sake I am required to carry life insurance, property in
surance, liability insurance, burglar insurance, earthquake insurance,
business insurance, tornado insurance, and fire insurance.
My business is so governed that it is no easy matter for me to find
who owns it. I am inspected, expected, suspected, and disrespected; ex
amined, reexamined, informed, required, summoned, fined, commanded,
and compelled until I provide an inexhaustible supply of money for ev
ery known need, desire, or hope of the human race.
Simply because I refused to donate to something or other, I am boy
cotted, talked about, lied about, held up and held down, and robbed until
I am almost ruined.
I can honestly tell you that except for the miracle that happened I
could not enclose this check. The wolf that comes to so many doors
now-a-days just had pups in my kitchen. I sold them and here is the
money.”
-o
Another cow-lessly written limerick:
The stork was due at Chockoyotte,
But didn’t seem to cow a lot;
To keep his date
He’s awful late;
He’ll lose his job as like as not.
/
To freshen up your
end - of - the - season
frock, or to put a
touch of spring gay
ety on your new
frock, this colorful
jewelry will turn the
trick . ..
Bracelets, Necklaces, Pins and Clips in
many colors and many artful designs.
FANNYE'S
Ladies Specialty Shoppe
209 Roanoke Avenue
Womans Club To
Meet Monday
The monthly meeting of the Wo
mans Club will be held on Monday,
March 7th, at 3:00 p.m. at the Club
House. During the afternoon a
tribute will be paid to Helen Keller
and a silver offering will be taken
for the Helen Keller Foundation
for the blind. The guest speaker
for the afternoon will be Rev.
Lawrence Stell and his subject will
be “International Relations”. A
full attendance of all club mem
bers is requested.
Important Event
(Continued from Pg. 1, Sec. B>
feet long. And to my mind the
arrival in Roanoke Rapids of the
contents of this box is the “Most
Important Event” in Roanoke Rap
ids during the past thirty-two
years.
The box contained the first mi
croscope to ever arrive in Roanoke
Rapids. To eliminate typhoid fever
all surface wells were filled up, and
that event, with its many trials
and tribulations, is another story—
but through the enlarged eyes of
that microscope a blood test of ev
eryone, man, woman and child,
passed. A malaria census was
made, and this census produced
the fact that seventy-six percent
of the people in Roanoke Rapids
had malaria. By hard work, and
after a continuous campaign a
gainst malaria, a malaria census
was taken ten years later, which
proved that the seventy-six per
cent had been reduced to 1-3 of
one percent.
The details of the fight against
malaria is another story, but an
interesting one.
During the past thirty-two years
churches, bridges, sidewalks, roads,
schoolhouses, the hospital, mills,
stores, electric plants and homes
have been built—but I wonder if
I’ve proved my statement when I
say that I think the “Most Impor
tant Event” in Roanoke Rapids in
the past 32 years was the arrival
of that express box containing the
first microscope for use in Roa
noke Rapids, which microscope
was the means used to show every
one the true, but deplorable, ma
larial conditions, and again it was
the incentive for some of us to go
to work to better the health con
ditions.
No one would claim, even today,
that Roanoke Rapids is a health
resort, but thirty-two years ago
and before that microscope was
put to work, Roanoke Rapids com
pared favorably with the condi
tions in the “Black Hole of Cal
cutta.”
Scouts Use Clever Hiding Places
*********
HAVE YOU THE BUTTON?
City-Wide Hunt Is Raging
__ *
If you are stopped and asked the
question, “Have You The Button?”
just don’t pay it any attention; it’s
just a game that Troop 142, Boy
Scouts of America, is playing to
decide what patrol will journey to
Rocky Mount next Wednesday to
visit Troop Eleven of that city. It
all started when Scouter Bill Dra
per and a Patrol from Eleven visit
ed 142 here last Friday night, to
decide the patrol that would re
turn the visit, a scheme was work
ed out using the game, Hide the
Button.
Friday night, before the Troop
meeting adjourned, Scoutmaster
Sherrod Crumpler secretly slipped
a large metal button to a member
of one of the patrols. Then the
rules were explained. You could
walk up to any Scout in the troop
and ask him the question, “Have
You the Button?” He could say
“yes” if he had it or could answer
“yes” if he did not have it; but
could not answer no if he did have
it. Then if he did not give it up
you searched him.
The idea of the whole thing it:
the Patrol having the button in
their possession this Friday night
will journey to Rocky Mount next
week. A variety of schemes have
been worked out in order that the
cutton could not be found; taping
it to a boy’s back; sewing it in a
lapel; using a shoe heel; but it has
been found each time. Now no
one knows who has it. The Patrol
with the button in its possession
must be very smart, but Scouters
Sherrod Crumpler, Roy Carver,
Rudolph Waters and Bill Alligood
will be very much relieved when
Friday night arrives; for the boys
are asking them, "Have You the
Button?”
Tacky Party
A tacky party will be sponsored
by the Rosemary Girls Club Friday
night, 7:30, at the Rosemary Band
Hall. A prize will be given for
the tackiest costume. Good music,
games and dancing will be enjoyed.
STIEFF Sterling
Corsage Pattern
25% DISCOUNT
DURING MARCH
on certain pieces
To you who are contemplat
ing starting your Sterling set
—don’t miss this most op
portune time. And you who
need fill-ins take advantage
of this offer now.
Sixteen pieces, complete
service for four
24.75
Convenient Terms Too
All CHINA in Stock
25% DISCOUNT
DURING MARCH
The above offer applies to all
china in our stock regardless
of price, including Theodore
Haviland’s French.
Complete Services From
4.46 to $175.
Twenty - seven patterns in
stock from which to choose.
We invite your
credit account.
LYNCHES
Established 1903
GIFTS and JEWELRY
Roanoke Rapids, N. C.
C. E. Spencer
Gets State
School Job
Charles E. Spencer, High Point
insurance man and former physical
education director at the high
school and Y.M.C.A. of High Point,
has been appointed head of the
health and physical education de
partment of the state public
schools, beginning March 1st, an
nouncement being made by Clyde
A. Erwin, Superintendent of Public
Instruction. His headquarters will
be in Raleigh with state depart
ment of public instruction.
Mr. Spencer is a former resident
of this city, a graduate of Roanoke
Rapids High School and the Uni
versity of North Carolina. He is a
brother of Mrs. C. L. Shell of this
city and has a host of friends here
who wish for him every success in
his new work.
■ Hulska - Vick
Miss Lossie Elen Vick, of En
field, and Chester August Hulska,
of Chicago, were married in Chi
cago on February the 5th. They
are making their home in Chicago.
Mrs. Hulska is the daughter of
Mr. and Mrs. T. L. Vick, of Enfield.
She is a graduate of the Enfield
School, the Louisburg College, and
a New Jersey Hospital. At the
present time she is connected with
a hospital in Chicago.
I YOU.
HOW/
V^es, Purina Dog Chow
is the feed that gives all
dogs better spirit, keeps them
feeling fit, noses keen, tails
a-waggin’. Get it at our Store,
the new Purina Distributor
here in town!
HALIFAX
FARMERS
SUPPLY
COMPANY
Roanoke Ave. at 11th,
Roanoke Rapids, N. C.
•.V.'.V.V.