All the News
That’s Fit
To Print
VOLUME XLVI
Resulls
In Great Newspaper
Each day during the seventh
)eriod, twenty Grimsley students
inter the coat and tie world of
he businessman. For an hour
ivery day, the HIGH LIFE room
)ecomes the office of a large
lorporation.
Even as the room is entered,
in aii; of complete organization
ind intense work is felt. Usually,
iditors Parrett and Watson are
isCussing the ad situation or
eadlines for the following pa-
are with Mrs. Morton. The page
liters are eagerly drawing up
utlines for their pages and mak-
ig headlines.
The ad staff is busy drawing
p prospective ads and calling the
Ivertisers. The rest of the staff
writing articles or working on
rejects like the subecription
rive.
As Editor Watson said, “With
his tremendous organization,
low can we not come out with a
'reat paper?”
You tell me, Winthrop!
APRIL
FOOLS
frashmen Award
Deserving Trash
I
Th Federation of Trashmen of
tmerica, an organization of pick-
ippers, announces the 1971-72
cholarship fund to be awarded
o any deserving trash now en-
olled in GHS. The award will be
iresented to the student (or in
xceptional cases, a teacher)
raduating the academic year ’71-
72 (not later than ’75-’76), who
hows the most promise in suc-
eeding at this worthy profession.
There will be a series of ser
ous rigid eliminations to choose
hose students most worthy of
hese awards. The first will con-
ist of the ability to pick up a
rashcan witho-ut falling in it.
)nce the field is thus narrowed,
he entrants shall go through
lersonal interviews. On the basis
if these interviews and the cand-
dates’ scholarship (max 0.5 grade
verage), a term paper (max. 3
rords, 1 trash can source), test
cores (max. 199 on combined
JAT’s), work habits (work?),
eachers’ recommendations (de-
iciency slips), and inability to
ead any of the above, the awards
l^ill be awarded.
Any student wbo feels he is
leserving of this high honor may
pply for the scholarship in the
IIGH LIFE room (why there?).
I’he first prize, full scholarship
f 44c (may be more) will be
/aiting. So Seniors (or teachers),
hink about your chances, look
t the competition, be proud.
APRIL
FOOLS
GRIMSLEY HIGH SCHOOL GREENSBORO, N.C. 27410 MARCH 29, 1972
NUMBER 11
High Life ediforial staff takes a break during their busy schedule. From left to right front
row: Butch Allgood, Parke Puterbaugh, Winthrop Watson. Back row: Brian Shaw, Harb Under
wood, J. B. Parrett, Rorin Platt.
Service Club Treats Crimsiey
To An Outstanding New Award
By Parke Puterbaugh
Surely you’ve heard of the
“Whirlies of the Week” contest
which recognizes outstanding
achievements in athletics. Now
PABST, a new service club here
at Grimsley, is sponsoring a sim
ilar contest, “Alcoholic of- the
Week,” which recognizes out
standing achievements in the field
of drinking.
This fine upstanding contest is
truly representative of the Grims
ley student body in that it is
open to students of all ages, sizes,
and tolerances.
Each Monday, nominations are
made for the previous weekend.
Any student can make a nomina
tion simply by placing the name
of the person he feels most de
serving of the award in the gal
lon jug in the main hall.
All interested nominees must
then take the Scholastic Alcohol
Test (SAT), the results of which
narrow the number of candidates
to three. These three are then
interviewed by a six-man board
(known as the six pack) who
make the final decision.
On Friday, the name of the
happy winner is announced.
The winner, if a boy, receives
a leather belt with a solid gold
buckle in the shape of a beer
bottle.
The winner, if a girl, receives
a silver charm bracelet with fig
urines depicting the events of a
typical weekend including a crum
pled fender, bottles of aspirin
and Murine, a pink citation, a
corkscrew, etc.
In addition, ail winners receive
a year’s subscription to the pub
lication of th4 American Bar
Association, The Bar Stool. Fin
ally they are given honorary mem
berships to PABST.
PABST stands for Promotion
of Alcoholic Beverages at School
and in Town. They are sponsored
by the parent organization whose
local representative is Lindsey S.
Dillard, owner of Hot Shot Bar
and Grill in Liberty.
PABST plans additional activ
ities and services for the future,
including a massive Drink-In at
County Park, a raffle to raise
money for the repeal of the
drunken driving laws, and a mas
sive en^o^ment campaign aimed
at teenagers and women over 65.
,.. And J^ow, From Peoria, III,.
Ils no reprirent meme pas leur
souffle. Rien ne bougeait plus
la-bas, pres de la tour. Ils y
coururent. Le premier sur lequel
Sylv ain avait tire etait la, dan
Therbe seche, sur le ventre, im
mobile: il etait mort. Et le sec
ond? Ils chercherent partout:
rien. II n’avait pu fuir que du
cote de la chartreuse, par le cou
loir ou gisait Tofficier, mais une
chasse a I’homme etait difficile
da nsce labyrinthe. Pourt ant, il
fallait retrouver I’homme. Ils
fouillerent le c loitre, les c e
llules des moines, 1 es jardins
(c haque moine avait son petit
jardin individual) d’ou I’on ne
pouvait s’echapper puisqu’ils don-
naient, e ux aussi, sur le vide.
Rien dans la cou de 1 a ferme.
Virgile, ses chevres sorties, avat,
il ne savait par quel cour de la
instinct, cadenasse la porte d’en-
tree, la seule par laquelle on put
g agner 1 e dehors; personne n’y
avait touche, la chef etait encore
sur le rebord de la fenetre de
la cusine-c’etait toujours laqu’-
Arrizzi la placait.
Enticing 7^ew Ceremony
Flashlight, Grimsley’s chapter
of the National Dishonor Society,
formed last April 1, has recently
inducted fourteen new members.
It may be recalled that admis
sion into the NDS is very selec-
Knock ’Em Upside The Head
Rorin Platt has been selected
to attend the Vice-President’s
conference on golf and tennis
playing. The. requirements to at
tend this elite conference are (1)
to be from a majority group, (2)
to be conservative to the point
of insanity, and (3) to be able to
accurately knock off the hat of
your tennis partner.
This particular session will
train already protficient tennis
muggers into tennis murderers. An
afternoon course in the basics of
golf assassination will alo be un
dertaken. This -will be the only
course taught specifically by Mr.
Agnew.
Rorin is looking forward to his
meeting with the esteemed Vice-
President and is especialiy look
ing forward to the conference so
that he can “learn a new way to
kill off those $&0%* commies.”
tive. In fact, there is only a small
percentage of the school that can
cut classes, not do homework,
flunk tests, be tremendously
boisterous, tear apart the biology
lab, and break glass in the park
ing lot without being expelled.
To prevent pandemonium from
breaking loose at the next induc
tion ceremony, the ceremony will
be kept small and will be held
in the school parking lot. The
students and their cars will
screech across the parking lot at
breakneck speed when their
names are called. A carnation will
be placed on each antenna as
soon as the car reaches the big
gest bump in the lot. This mem
orable event will only be attended
by the happy students’ parents
and the more elite of Grimsley’s
faculty.
Seniors Twisted By
Innovative Change
J. B. Parrett, vice-president of
the Senior class, has announced
the schedule that will lead the
upper-classmen to graduation day.
Parrett said that this year’s exer
cises • ^’will have a decidedly new
twist.”
The first big moment will be
the Award’s Assembly, the open
ing ceremonies for this year’s
Class Day. The awards this year
will be given for most thermom
eters stolen from the chemistry
lab, getting roaring drunk off
two beers, sneaking a sword
cane onto the school grounds,
best decorated locker, and, of
course, for parking your car In
Mr. Glenn’s reserved space for
two days in a row. Nominations
for those deserving these awards
may be placed in either of the
third floor bathrooms.
The most innovative change for
the end of the year proceedings
will be the original Class Day
play, a spoof of the student body
written and performed by the
GHS faculty. You will be able
to see all the asinine things you
did in class reinacted before your
very eyes!
The afternoon swimming party
wili be combined with the Facul
ty Tea and will be held in the
nearby sewage pipes that travel
below Aycock St.
The commencement exercises
will be held outdoors in hope
that the colorful caps and gowns
will become bleeding madras.
A final word from the Senior
Class V.P.: “We have just ar
ranged to have the eloquent
Lynnwood Bullock as the speak
er for graduation.”
o
News
Briefs
The Greensboro Youth Coun
cil is sponsoring a new project
chaired by Council member Caro
lyn Tyer. Questionable films wiU
be shown for Greensboro youth
under 18 Saturday afternoon at
a local State St. theater.
The Grimsley ROTC unit was
called into active duty to extin
guish the People’s Rebellion in
Pourtsebie, Indiana.
The coaching staff will be the
featured group at this year’s
prom in the Boys’ Gym. Mr. Fur-
com will also play a solo on the
test tubes.
John Forrester’s Pad deceased
on March 4, 1972. The rites were
held the following day.
HIGH LIFE is proud to an
nounce the founding of the uni
versal Frisbie Organization (UFO)
at Grimsley. See posters and The
Benchwarmer for further info.