Newspapers / Grimsley High School Student … / April 1, 2008, edition 1 / Page 2
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Jackal 31 January 31,2008 That’s what she said iYRICHWINESTOCK Cat Whisperer- Ten members of the Grimsley com munity are now billionaires after dis covering the school's infamous hidden treasure. These six students and four teachers, members of a legendary secret society, discovered the riches beneath the southernmost tree in the Grove. "At first, I thought this was an elabo rate senior class prank," said Principal K. Flem. "After seeing the 24 karat gold whirlies, I am now a believer." After janitor Mike McLuck discov ered a map and secret code engraved inside a locker on the second floor of the main building, this hidden treasure has piqued the interest of students and teachers alike for the past two centuries. Although most students and faculty members were interested in the riches, not just anyone had the ability to recover them. "If I had not been able to use the se cret society's cutting-edge x-ray technol ogy, I never would have been able to determine the exact position and loca tion beneath the school's campus," said the senior speculated to have cracked the code, but who wishes to reihain anonymous for fear people will pretend to be his friend to grab a share of fhe loot. "Newsweek," "The New York Times," and "Oprah" all recently shared the story of the Grimsley treasure, caus ing people around the world to flock to campus in hopes of becoming the next Whirlie billionaires. , .nicYYici Photo has piqued the interest of students and campus in hopes of becoming the next teachers alike for the past two centuries. Whirlie billionaires. Grace Communtiy Church’s basketball team went undefeated and won the CBL championship. Brown cows do not produce chocolate milk. I got it in the city that ioves you back |BYJENNYJUMP-A-BROOK avoid telling the general public aboi Paleontologist computer crash, but a concernt mother addressed the problem. Clair ing her son did not have the ability i V ‘ Geography inTuscany is two thirds hdly, one fourth mountainous, and eight percent plains that form the Arno River Valley. Viva Itaha! Parents were baffled but pleased with the numerous A's on their children's re port cards; however, excitement soon ceased once SIMS operator Belovely Carruthly announced one or more stu dents hacked into the school's computer system. Upon returning from Spring Break, Carruthley noticed many files were lost, including class ranks, GPAS, and atten dance records. "We did not know what to do. I spoke to Principal K-Flem about the ca tastrophe, and he recommended that we give all students the benefit of the doubt and distribute all A's. We simply could not forego giving out grades," said Carruthley School administration was hoping to avoid telling the general public about the computer crash, but a concerned mother addressed the problem. Claim ing her son did not have the ability to attain such high marks, she demanded answers. "I am not the only parent alleging my child is not deserving of all A's," said Wilma Bundy, mother of a junior honors student. Other confused parents began call ing the school to contact their children's teachers for explanations. , "I finally had to do a CORRECT-ED phone announcement to the entire school community," said Carruthly. Though the situation has been clari fied, many students and parents remain perplexed because the computer pro gram remains dysfunctional. "We expect to have SIMS in full op eration before Graduation Day," said a confident K-Flem. Today’s IBYGIRL-WITO-EDIIS-WIKIFEDIA Creeper From beauty to fashion, trends can change like the weather, and sure enough, they have changed again. Some unlikely styles have become very chic, and now the previously unexpected is expected all over Hollywood and fashion runways. A look at the new "in" styles of spring: 1. Sweatsuits. Gone are the days of Juicy Couture velour a terry cloth tracksuits, worn to death by celebs on the go, such as Paris Hilton and Britney Spears. Windbreakers are back and stronger than ever. They have become especially popular in unexpected shades of purple, pink, and teal; patterns with stars and stripes are big as well. Anything that reminds one of the wall-to-wall carpeting in their childhood home is definitely a hit. 2. Overalls. They are finally back! Blue, white, red, pink, or patterned, overalls have been the rage in Europe for the past few years. The United States is slowly catching on to this trend, which is not only fashionable but also convenient. "One can store all kinds of things in overalls," said Coco Cunningham, Neiman Marcus's Head Buyer of Clothing and Accessories. "The practicality is incredible. You can simply toss things down your overalls — and there are so many pockets!" 3. Pigtails. Nothing is cuter than the look of a four-year-old for the bright, carefree spring season. Whether worn low and messy or high and tight, pigtails make a statement that screams youth and innocence. Special touches for a splash of flair can include bows, clips, braids, or the tres chic sparkly hair glitter. Extra props to anyone who can manage a few colored streaks of hair in the tails. 4. Ripped jeans. Blue jeans ripped to shreds give the impression the person wearing them is absolutely bad to the bone. Holes are no longer confined to knees— catching a quick glimpse of thigh or shin can be refreshing when the weather becomes warm. The rocker style also provides a pleasant alternative to the pastels, florals, and wispy fabrics that accompany spring. Rare pygmy killed )YCHEESECAKE Food Critic After a season of feuding on MTV's "The Hills," multiple sources have con firmed a romantic relationship between Lauren Conrad (LC) and her nemesis, Spencer Pratt. Although Pratt was the reason for the friendship ending be tween Conrad and her ex-best friend, Heidi Montag, Conrad claims she is ready to move on and continue her won derful relationship with Pratt. -When questioned about her on-screen feuds with Pratt and her intense hatred of him, Conrad admits all of it was scripted. "I only said those things about Spencer because I was forced to do it. Spencer is one of the kindest, most genu ine persons I have ever met, and I truly believe he and I are soul mates," said Conrad. Pratt's ex-fiancee, Heidi Montag, is "devastated by their new relationship and thinks Lauren is doing this to ruin her life," informs Montag's best friend, Jen Bunny. Since discovering the two together. Montag has moved back to her home town. Crested Butte, Colorado, to find comfort in her family; she has al ready sold her engagement ring. "I'm just trying to move on from this stage in my life and don't know what the future holds for me, but I'm certain , InteYMd'lfmto Mount Airy is a city in Surry County, North Carolina. Chang and Eng Bunker were born in Thailand. that Lauren and I will never be friends again," said Montag. Not only has Conrad stolen Montag's fiancee, but she may also be stealing her job as well. After Teen Vogue fired her, Conrad met with Brent Bolthouse to discuss coming on board at Bolthouse Productions, where Montag is presently employed. Because Conrad will not work with Heidi, it Heidi will soon be looking for new employment.
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