Newspapers / East Wind (Asian Students … / Oct. 1, 1997, edition 1 / Page 16
Part of East Wind (Asian Students Association, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill) / About this page
This page has errors
The date, title, or page description is wrong
This page has harmful content
This page contains sensitive or offensive material
"Shcxjtxng By Jennifer Mar In the past several years, interracial dating is becoming one of the hottest issues among the younger generation. I remember in high school, my Asian male friends and I had a discussion on dating. I happened to be the only female present. Anyway, till this day when we see each other on campus, we resume our discussion. It's been four years since our first debate that brewed in high school chemistry class. What did we discuss? Should Asians be allowed to date out side of their race? I said, "Why not? We live in a melting pot society and it's time to cross the color line." Well, there are two sides of the coin to this issue. Their opinion was that it's fine for Asian guys to date non-Asian females, but not acceptable for Asian females to date non- Asian males. But, hey, let's not be hypocrites, here. The guys asked me why I wouldn't date an Asian guy? During my high school years, I didn't. Why? It's not because I didn't want to or wouldn't. The fact was that there wasn't a big lot to choose from. But if there was one that came across my path, I would. They agreed that there was n't a huge Asian population at our school. However, I was disturbed by the fact that they said still wouldn't date an Asian girl. I have just one word for them, WHATEVER! They replied that it was because they were raised in the U.S. and they were attracted to the standard, typical Caucasian female ... can we say, let's not stick to stereotypes? I don't think Asian guys are scrawny geeks, wearing glasses and plugging away at num bers. Before I went to college, I honestly thought I would never date an Asian guy. I guess I thought that way because I wasn't exposed to enough Asians in high school. At that time, all of us could not picture ourselves marrying Asians. However, I really believe and still do that if you fall in love with someone, no matter what color, go for it. As I moved to Carolina, I realized that there was a huge Asian population on campus. I guess this is where I went to another "level" of dating. I began to date Asians. My per spective changed in that I could now picture myself marry ing an Asian. One day, the guys and I saw each other in the Pit, we con tinued the conversation we've carried over the years and brought in other Asians into our con versation who had their own opin ions on the issue. Everyone had different perspec tives. Some said that Asians should only date Asians, while other agreed with me. Funny thing is that I don't recall ANYONE agreeing with the guys' standpoint of not dating Asian females. Sorry guys, but being hypocrites just don't fly. In retrospect, I realized I have kept an open view on things and the guys haven't changed. I could be wrong, but I still haven't seen any of them date any Asians. Now, when I bump into them, I still ask why. Same ole' same ole' response. All I have to say is that for all of you Asian males who feel the same way as my Asian guy friends, you are just missing out on an opportunity of a lifetime. I respect their views, views that haven't gotten in the way of our friendship or stopped our ongoing debate. But back to the issue, I am proud to be an Asian American female and my point of writing this editorial is not to offend anyone, but to open everyone's view on things. Give every one a chance - even if they are wrong. By The Notoriovis FOB^s The subject of interracial dating has had a long and storied history. There was a time, generations ago, that a white man dating a minority woman could enjoy the curiosity and jealously of his ofey companions while his colored counterpart suffered abuse, even death, for nary an attempt to date a white woman. And while it would seem that times have changed regarding this dichotomy of atti tudes concerning interracial dating, in reality, perpetrators of the aforementioned racist dogma have only subverted and not truly changed these racist attitudes. To the casual and uniformed observer, a white man's interest in Asian women indicates a certain color blind open minded ness and a desire to learn more about Asian culture and cus tom. Many, if not most such white men, believe themselves to be progressive liberals and think that dating Asian women somehow atones for the multitude of injustices committed by "great" white civilizations of the past. But as anyone with experience in socio logical study, formal or informal, has observed, American society continues to operated according to a white, male dominated patriarchal system. Thus, hose who have been raised in America hold with them a kind of collective unconscious - an internalized knowledge that the whit patri arch is,has been, and forever will be dominant. By now the reader may be wondering, "What does this crap have to do with white guys dating Asian women or Asian guys dating white women?" In response, we feel that romantic interludes between white men (henceforth referred to as "the MAN") and Asian females embody all the patriarchal, white dominated attitudes in contemporary society that we detest. It's not that we feel that Asian women are somehow inherently more submissive than their white counterparts. We do believe, however, that if the Asian woman is not alert to the kinds of subtle dominance that the white "Asian- woman dater" wishes (subconsciously or con sciously) to enforce, she may allow herself to rein force the man's China-doll, bound foot concep tion of the relationship. Ultimately, an Asian woman's needs may be better served, in reference to romantic relationships, by avoiding the MAN like the bubonic plague, or at least by examining the MAN'S motives in detail. The reader might now ask, "Why don't the authors feel that the opposite scenario of Asian male dating white female is deserving of equal scorn?" We mentioned earlier that the cen ter of societal power in America lies with the MAN. A romantic relationship between Asian male and female thus undermines the societal power structure by allowing the for mation of an intimate bond with what the MAN conceives is his possession. While in the short-term, our approval of Asian-male, white- female relationships and concurrent disapproval of white- male, Asian-female may seem to reinforce America's tendency toward chauvinism in general, we feel that our attitude serves to promote egalitarian interests and the disestablishment of the MAN. If America ever achieves its ideal of mass egalitarianism, the aforementioned arguments would obviously no longer hold. At that point, no interactions among men and women of any combination of culture and creed would have nega tive implications. Lest anyone reading this article take all this bullshit too seriously, let us firmly state: We don't really care who the hell you date, be it minority men or women, white men or women, transsexual or animals outside our species. We do feel that interpersonal relationships hold macro-level implications for all of society. Nonetheless, we don't mean to conduct a personal attack upon white guys that are probably thinking, "Whut in duh hay-ul is wrong with these crazy chinks?" Needless to say, our article might most appropriately be ended with the following statement: We don't give a damn. 16
East Wind (Asian Students Association, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill)
Standardized title groups preceding, succeeding, and alternate titles together.
Oct. 1, 1997, edition 1
16
Click "Submit" to request a review of this page. NCDHC staff will check .
0 / 75