Page 34
December 2005
The AC Phoenix
DETAC
'itELEASE
Mercedes L. Miller
It’s For Your Good
Mercedes L. Miller
Watching a child whose spirit has not been
assimilated to the idiosyncrasies of the world is
amazing yet simplistic. Over the last year I have
learned three valuable lessons from Dominic (my
nephew) - the two year old genius, (Okay he is
three years old - but he was two when these
Einstein-like revelations became apparent to me.)
Lesson One:
Christmas Eve is generally the day we gather at
my mother’s house to share time-honored food
traditions (humdingers, cheese roll and other tasty
delights), express our thankfulness to each other
and God and exchange verbal pleasantries that warm the heart and encourage the
spirit.
Last year I was feeling a bit under the weather so I retreated to the bedroom
where my 93 year old grandmother was reveling in the parade of people. I lay on
the far end of the bed hoping relief would soon penetrate my air passageway and
relive the pressure in my chest.
Just then, the cutest little two-year-old I had seen all day came bopping through
the door. Eyes exploring colorful lights, hands discovering poinsettia plants and
bells hung for audio/visual delight and taste buds apparently overwhelmed with a
cornucopia of different treats being stuffed into his little mouth.
Suddenly, I got an injection of energy. I wanted to mush my lips into those
golden brown cheeks. I said, ‘Dominic, give Aunt some sugar.” He belted for the
bed, struggled with all of his might to climb up and willfully turned his head to the
side as he knows the routine. I pulled him close, squeezed him tight and allowed
my lips to plunge into his plush, pudgy cheeks. He laid there on the bed with me for
two minutes; it was so peaceful.
Okay I am exaggerating. Probably thirty seconds. He then scrambled to get off
the bed as quickly and feverishly as he worked to get on. I pleaded with him to stay
but to no avail. He was gone as swiftly as he came.
It occurred to me that generally this is how those who have been conditioned
to the things of the world and operating by feelings and emotions often behave. We
sense that our work in a particular area is over, a professional or romantic relation
ship has sen/ed its purpose, a habit or tradition is no longer beneficial but we keep
holding on, trying to make it work.
Dominic had served his purpose. He came to give Aunt some joy and allow her
to indulge in one of the things she loves most in life (him). Without resistance he
proceeded to his next expedition.
Regardless of how I prodded and encouraged him to stay, his intention was not
to lie beside Aunt and Great-grandma on the bed the entire Christmas Eve. He was
not going to allow the ailment or agenda of another person to thwart his quest for
more delicious goodies, festive lights and unauthorized discoveries under the
Christmas tree. He completed his assignment and kept moving.
Detachment is often a difficult process. We become so accustomed to what
is familiar and routine that when it is time to develop a new way of being or
move to the next phase of our existence, we do not. Our ability to do so is
encumbered because we will not emancipate what should be in the past in
efforts to convince it to stay in the present.
Understand the power of embracing all that is supposed to be in your life;
but, respect people, opportunities and concepts enough to release them when
their presence begins to become more of a hindrance and habit than they are
help and hope.
Identify at least one thing that you are certain it is time for you to release.
Make a conscious decision to change and operate in an alternate manner
allowing something different and productive into your life. The results you
experience will far outweigh the temporary pain of letting go of what is familiar.
After I embraced Lesson One that Dominic taught me I have been able to
let go of personal relationships whose time was spent, professional obligations
that offered more pressure than peace and self-defeating habits detrimental to
my existence. I am all the better for it. Release what does not serve you and
make room for new and exciting things in your life. Just like Dominic, you will
be glad you did.
Mercedes L Miller is a freelance speaker, writer and consultant. Her
life changing Meditation CDs are now available. Contact her at PO Box
25451, Winston-Salem, NC 27114 or visit www.mercedes-empowers.com.
This Year, Do Something Besides
Getting Mailed
HAVE SOME FUNI
Sure, food and gift-giving are fun, but after all that is put aside,
it's time to get out there and do something.
-Build a snowman. If you’re a veteran of the snow country, you
probably know how to do this blindfolded. If you're new on the scene,
here’s all you need to know. Start with a round, sizable ball of snow
packed by hand and roll it across the ground to build a larger base. For
a 6-foot snowman, make a 3-foot base, 2-foot middle and a 1-foot
head. Add your finishing touches - stovepipe hat, button nose and two
eyes made out of coal - and don’t forget to take pictures!
-Christmas caroiing. Gather carolers together in their most
colorful Christmas ciothes. Go door to door singing Christmas songs
(make up a song sheet if you don’t know the words.) Stick a candle in
a jam jar tied to a stick to serve as a flashlight. Consider visiting a
nursing home or hospital on your journey.
-Christmas pickle. This glass pickle ornament is placed on the
tree on Christmas Eve. Whoever finds the Christmas pickle in the
morning gets an extra present.
-Dreidel game. To play this game, get a dreidei (a kind of top)
and some chocoiate coins or candies. The four sides of the top each
contain a Hebrew letter that signifies a Jewish word: nun (nothing),
gimel (whole), hay (half) and shin (add to pot). Each player begins by
adding a candy to the pot, then obeying whichever word faces up. The
game ends when one player has all the candy.
-Host a holiday open house. Send out simple invitations to
friends and family giving out a loose period of time for dropping by. Ask
people to bring a favorite dish or drink. Make up holiday-theme games,
such as a holiday scavenger hunt, including such items as tinsel,
pine-needles, Christmas cookie, broken ornament. Search the
neighborhood for items.
-Kwanzaa. This African-American celebration, established in
1966, begins Dec. 26 and lasts seven days. Each day represents a
principle: unity, self-determination, coilective work and responsibility,
co-operative economics, purpose, creativity and faith. A table is set up
with a colorful mat and a candle-holder containing seven candles: one
black (for the people, in the center), three red (for their struggle, on the
left), and three green (for their hope for the future, on the right). Light
the black candle first, then, another candle left, to right, one per night.
Also on the mat are corn and a unity cap. Books and other African
cultural items are also placed on the mat.
Celebrate
with
God at the Church of lour