MR. DOOLEY JR.
What Kind of Progress Can
Any People Make While
Wallowing in Mud Holes
Called Roads.
(Rhamkatte Roaster 1
"Oi notice thit th' pa-apers is
hevin' a lot to say aboot muddy
roads," said Mr Hennessy, "aa
shtreets aa th' loine."
"Iv course they ar-re," said Mr
Doolev, "f'r now is th' winter iv
their discontint. Nixt sumher they
will f'r git all aboot it an' th' most
hospitable, ginerous, progressive,
moral, wonderful pa-aple on earth
namely, fh' gr-reat Tar Heels, will
vote doon ivery proposition f'r beit
her roads."
Indade an' it does look lioke,"
said Mr Ilennessv, "it does look
loiketh' pa-aple wud git out of the
mud sometime. Tney hev hed since
Dan'l Hooue to do it.'
"An' it will be nearly till
arly till Dun'l
comes again bafure they will." said j
they will, saul ,
Mr Doolev. "Oi am proud iv th
ould North Shtate, hivia's blissins I
attiud her whoile we live we will i
droive along, git shtalled an' sink
through lu r an' Oi wud paste auny
domned furiner iu the mouth who
wud t'row mud on her fair name,
but Hinnissy, wau must admit thot,
she is mostly muddy thia tonne iv th j
year. In a tew of the progressive
couuties an towns of the Shtate ;
they hev planted rock in the mud, j
but allmost all ISorth Carolina 1
to day takin a mud bath fror
Junaluska to Manhatten Oiland
doon to be the broad Cape Fear;
sloshin aloug iu a Charybdis ir ooz
an' a Scylla iv compounded earth an
wather, with a broken cuss wurrd
here an there, ye can count 011 your
finghers th' counties in this Shtate
thot he macadem roads an they wud
nt heve hed thim iv it hadut been
f'r liein heardhearted town pa-aple
who outvoted the farmers' an th'
towns wouldent have paved the
itreetiiv all the nioiiied pa-aple wud
hev had their way. Talk of you
rich min! Thot town or county or
ehtateor nation that his th' most
rich divvils is the wan thot is curst
m ne thin Aigypt iver was be Moses
Aasou's rod. Its th' poor div
vils that pay the fraight, an' its
thim as has a small amount iv this
jyarrld's goods that make ould pro
gress pussh th' domned community
out iv the mud. To the demiuition
bow wows with yure sich min.
They help developemeut th' least
an' hinder it the aiost, an' hev th'
heaviest raysponsibilities an' th'
largest amount iv pure cussid
Adamantine selfishness in their
mouldy carcasses iv any dozen
classes iv American citizens, An
ould he divil worth fifty thousand
dollars will foight a graded school
till his miserly ould soul cant sleep
0' nights thiukin iv the foive
children of Luzrus thot his tax
wud idchoocate. He is a foine type
of th' frol who looses soight" iv
deaah an' hivin because a dollar
roise bechune him an' him, loike
a full moon. Oi would rather be
a onion-atein' dago with macaroony
an' fifteen Eyetallian children in th'
middle iv th' Panama canal or
Boston thin such a hay thin, heart
less, skin-flint loike that. Money?
Oiwudntgi.e a poipeful iv plug
cut f'r all th' cash iv thot ould
robber Rockyfeller if Oi hed to
murdher th' smallest desoir to help
me poor men iiogan idchoocate his
brats or vote a tax on th' tained
money of my neighbors f'r good
roads. Ui would rather nave a
heart inn me, warmed be the bludiv
a man God made thin to be anny
tax-dogm , unprincipled, shtuned-up
figger iv a humin bein' that looses
th' soul Ood gave him whoile he
runs his dirty finghers t'hrough th'
filthy coins he has shtole from his
fellow citizens. In ignorance iv
pa-aple on wan hand and th' greed
iv hounds on th' other hand is th'
reason North Carolina has mud
trails f'r roads an' shtreets. Fraid
they'll help somebody ilse; fraid
they'll git the county in debt till
poll tax will be ninety dallars on
wimmin an a thousond on min.
Bah! Hinnissy. Oi want to croak
whin Oi think iv it. Progress?
Phat koind iv progriss can anny pa
aple make whinn they wallow in
mad holes. Mad, Hinnissy, affcts
th mionds and souls ir min It
dont only wear oat horses an wag
gins, bat it makes us sordid and un
clean. It palls as doon frnm high
thoughts .an makes na do those
things we wad not do an lave un
done phat we wad do if we traviled
on macanam. Whin ye droive tin
xnoile through mad deep enough an
sticky enough to trap pterodactysi,
ye hev cussed iverytheing in soight
till your vocabulary is ixhaasted an
thin ye cuss yure vocabulary f'r
bein so limited. Whin ye git to
town with mad dabs above yure
eyes an in yure ears an bechune
yure teeth, all over your OTJtcoat
an yure hands, ye ar-re on aidge an
the bar room is the first piace ye go
to. It is degradin' f'r it ruins yure
chanct i hiviru Min in a mud
country ar-re contint with less than
pa-aple on solid ground. Ye can
judge any county or town by th
roads or shtreets it has. Oi dont
care if every other resource in it
has been developed to the point iv
diminishin nyturus, if th' high
ways is hub deep in mud, there is
thot issintial lakin in th' chracter
iv th pa aple thot is uicissary to
breezy life an hoigh toned ways;
to business success an shatesnon
ship. Ye might build a model city
sn top of gwndfa-thers mountain
an if pa-aple couldent git to it,
phat th' divvil use is it t'i annyboJy
or its self. A town mv hev iverjr
modheru aciuiretniut, but iv th'
pa-aple in th' rual disthricts can't
roide into it with their projooce;
git new oideas an' catch a glimpse
iv th' wurrid to carry buck to make
straighter furrows, better corn aii'
r.tfnn nf. hS COSt. tO in
, lti. V11IV town. The oidea I
is a lnloightiued pa-apie goin vear ,
in an' year out,draggin' alone thray
months in ivery doiu through mud i
mud. mud whin atone good grab!
they cud take sbtaguatiou by th'
lws liti 'bate her to rags ov
iuvis ,, 'hate her to rags over th'
iXrjt heads iv tax-shy miseis an
VnorjLiiuises. issue a few bundled
thousand iv bomls f'r prosterity to
pay willingly, an' make good roads
iu a few weeks, le can prate aboot
developmiut, grow-in, increase, adl
vancetneut. uplift, progress, til-
vour 0ij Webster's is wore up hunt
jn. -r synonym3 to publish to th'
wurrid thot yure towu uuJ c,1uut
un. shtate ftn, Mction i9 .istride th,
autvmjbik. iv go-doon-th'-pikedness
. f-,, i,. ;a ,,11 mmi
an pedestrians h?v to wear snow-
shows, horse wings an' waggin sled
runners to navigate thim, yo moight
as well shut up yure fountain iv
colored adjectives an' emigrate to
Halifax, f'r ytre delapidated citizen
ship as is indicated be yure roads,
dhroiv oft auny new-comer possess
in auny grav-matther at all, at all.
Ye can make a counthry's laws if
ye'll lemme make its roads. Oi'll 1
show ye a pa-aple thot ye can't legis- j
tate annything into iv ye'll on'yj
give thim rock roads; th' heel of th'j
oppreseer can never crush thim iu- j
to the mud. They travil a moile j
whoile mud road pa-aple is hitchin';
up. They'll git to town, take th' j
hoighest proice f'r a load of hay an' j
be back to home whoile yure 111 id j
farmer is leitin' his horses blow!
afther pullin'a dozen aiges an' fure j
naked wheels through a slongh iv
despond. Shud ye ask me which j
Oi would rather hev, good schools
or good roads, Oi would say give me
the roads. F'r wanet git roads an'
the population will git so shpeedy
it is ou'y a matther iv toime till
they'll hev good schools an' good
roads an' ivery other good thing
thot is. An' Hinnissy, th' way to
git th' oidea into pa-aples heads is
to build a piece iv good road, au'
let it end in a mud hole six feet
deep. When they drop down into
it, they will git some iv their domn
fool oideas out iv their heads by th'
shock.
"An' whin do ye look f'r good
roads in North Carolina," said Mr
Hinnissy,
"Whin th' gineration hot pays th'
tax is dead an gone to gloay, said
Mr Doolev. "Praise be to Allah th'
death must come to all min."
"Hit In ths Belly With a Pont of Bread,"
The Southern Republicans have
no bread except federal patronage,
They care nothing for the opinion
of the people in their own state,
Washington is their mecca. If they
can obtain approval there they are
happy. Brownlow has been dis
tributing the patronage in Tennessee
and the fellows who haven t had
their slice of pie are after his scalp.
They have held a meeting and adopt
ed resolutions against the "ignomin
ous despotism" of Brownlow. The
only thing that will make them
quiet will be to "hit them in the
belly with a pone of bread" to quote
Vance. It is the same way in
North Carolina. Of course there
are good Southern Republicans, who
resent "despotism," bat nine out of
ten who raise a row are men fight
ing for a peice of pie. News &
Observer.
Hottest on Earth.
A corraspondent of the Anglo
Saxon of Rockingham, asks "Where
is the hottest place on earth?" The
learned editor replies that Hamlet is
the hottest place; that it is so warm
there at some seasons that the trees
leave.
Now, any one knows the editor is
only joking, for everybody knows
that Yuma, Arizona, isdecfared the
hottest,
We are reliably informed that a
man once died at Yuma, and emigrat
ed to the land of fire and brimstone
and after reasonable time for accli
mation) he could stand it no longer
and immediately sent back to a friend
at Yuma asking him to Bend him a
fur coat and blankets.
If this is discredited the Courier
will give the name of a prominent and
thoroughly honorable North Carolin
ian who will confirm this statement j
How to Mako a Hot-Bad.
The location of the hot-bed is an
important matter. It should be on
well-drained soil, well sheltered
from wind and f uUy exposed to the
sun. It should be near the house,
for convenience.
Fresh manure from the horse sta
ble, mixed with litter from bedding,
is the material most generally made
use of to furnish the heat needed in
the hot-bed. A pile of this material
is spread ou the place selected for
the hot-bed, covering an area some
what larger than the hot-bed itself is
iDtended to be. It is thrown on the
ground in layers of a few inches in j
depth. Each layer is trod down
firmly before another is added, j
The pile should be finished off by ;
rounding it over. Leave it in this1
condition for a few days, until ;er- i
mentation sets in. This cau be told i
by a warm moisture which will be
rising from it. It should then be
forked over, shaking out the long!
straw as this is done, and making 1
another heap of it, as at first. In
two or three days it will agaiu give j
evidence of further heating. After;
this, it is in condition for final dis-1
position 111 the bed. As the manure
is now thrown into shape, it should ;
be packed down well, making it as,
uniformly compact as possible.1
There should be about two and a!
half feet of this material. j
It is now ready for the frame. ;
This should be put in place and'
covered with sash. Bank up well
outside the frame with manure
Allow the sasli to remaiu in place
until strong heat is generated.
When this begius to decrease, and
the thermometer does not register
more than 85 or 90 degrees, cover
the manure inside the frame with
about six iuches of tine, rich soil,
worked until it is in the mellowest
possible coudition. The bed is now
ready for use. Eben E Rexford in
"Making the Country Home," in
The Outiug Magazine for March.
The Fellow That's Willing to Work.
Ho goes to his tak with a soiijj and a smile.
Ho nevor siivs "mivbn" and "after a while,"
The follow that's willing to work.
But he lives iu t he sunshine that gladdens to
day. And he lightens each load by his good na
1 11 red way
The follow that's willing to work.
He isn't afraid of the trusts that expand.
He doesn't look forward to woe in the land, j
The follow that's willing to work. j
For he knows that the earth will give food, :
drink and air, ,
And there's always enough and a little to '
spare
For the fellow tliat's willing to work. ;
Washington Star, j
The Trust Building, Charlotte's!
handsomest structure, has been sold
by the Piedmont Realty Company
to Charles Oresham. The considera
tion was $130,000.
Reduced Rates.
The SKA BOARD begs to announce that
on account of the occasions mentioned below
the rates and conditions named will apply.
Chattanooga, Tenn: Southern Baptist
Convention and Auxiliary Societies,May 10th
15th,-190(i. Itate, one lirat class fare plus
25c for the round trip, (minimum rate) 50
cents, tickets Bold May 8th, 0th and lOtli,
final limit tec days in addition to date of
sale. Tickets may lie extended.
Fer further information as to rates from
any point or schedules apply to your nearest
Agent or address the undersigned.
O H Oattis
Traveling Passenger Agent,
Raleigh, N C.
Undertaking Establishment.
The undersigned begs to announce that he
has opened allrst-clasa Undertaking Estab
lishment and is now ready to serve those in
need of uy thing in his line. His stock is
new and complete snd his price reason
able. New Hearse, Gentle Stock and careful
drivers. A share of your patronage is re
spectfully solicited. Respectfully,
J. W. JOLLY.
Store opposite Lewis-Winslow Bdw. Store, Ashe
boro, N. C,
Li
D. K. LOOKHART,
DENTIST,
Asheboro, N. O.
HOURS: $ $5 to 5 pm
I am now In my office prepared to practice
dentistry in its various branches.
SOUTHERN MACHINE
WORKS
We build Machinery to or- '
der, overhaul and repair ma
chinery, cut gears, make
patterns, models, etc.
8outhern Machine Works,
High Point, N- C.
Furs! Furs! Furs!
My advice to all trap
pers is to stop catching
minks this season, if
you see fit to send me
furs I shall pay you mar
ket price fJr same.
J D Payne, Burlington, N C
Tboosands Ha?e Kidney
Trouble and Never Suspect it
How To Find Out.
Fill a bottle or common glass with your
water and let it stand twenty-four hours ;
tliiigimlicatesait
unhealthy con
dition of the kid
neys ; if it stains
your linen it is
evidence of kid
ney trouble ; too
frequent desire
to pass it or pain
in the hack is
also convincing proof that the kidneys
mid bladder are out of order
What To Io.
There is comfort in the knowledge so
often expressed, that Dr. Kilmer's
Swamp-Root, the great kidney remedy,
fulfills every wish in curing rheumatism,
pain in the back, kidneys, liver, bladder
and every part of the urinary passage.
It corrects inability to hold water
and scalding pain in passing it, or bad
effects following use of liquor, wine or
beer, and overcomes that unpleasant lie
ccssity of being compelled to go often
during the day, and to get up many
times during the night. The mild and
the extraordinary effect of Swatnp-KOOf
is soon realized. It stands the highest
for its wonderful cures of the most dis
tressing cases. If you need a medicine
you should have the best. Sold by drug
gists in fifty-cent and one-dollar sizes.
You may have a sample bottle and a
boot tnat tens an r
;,..: tuttVi inl fror ""
mail' Address Dr. IL Sl
L-';tiM Rt Pi Hi 11 or.
i.. '
writing mention this paper and aon t
mate any mistake, but member the
name, Pr. Kilmer's Swamp-Root, and
the address, Binghamton, N. Y.
t . . XT V tin, or Rmua( BwajAB-RooC
pm aioniprBfI
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THE IMPLEMENT GO.
RICHMOND, VA,
ARE HEADQUARTERS FOR
Fencing,
Roofing,
Barb Wire,
Poxiltry Netting.
Write for prices and catalogue.
We carry one of the largest and
beat stocks of
Farm Implements
in the South, and can save you
money on your purchases. What
ever you need, get our prices be
fore purchasing.
Special bargains in Farm Wafons
and Bustles. Best makes.
Low Prices.
The Implement Co.,
1302 Hila St., Richmond, Ta.
Buff Wyandottes
and
White Leghorns.
On Wyandottes I won two first,
one second and two third prizes
on five entries at the Central
Carolina Fair. These are some
of the best strains in America.
My Leirhorns are headed .by a
fin cockerel from Wycoft strain.
Eggs $1.00 per setting of 13.
Satisfaction guaranteed.
GEO. W. PUGH,
Box 39 - - Millboro, N. C.
V. W. JONES
-.Vhe
Groee
can furnish you the best in sea
sonable edibles. If it is for din
ner, supper or breakfast consult
him. He always has fine flour,
fresh butter, as well as variety
of delicacies.
:F" m
IS
IfPays Others;
Why Not You.
The roads will soon be in conition for driving either long or
short distances. A buggy will soon be in demand. Why not
secure the best?
Rock Hill Buggies.
Sold by
McCra.ry Redding Ha.rdwa.re
Company.
Publishers
and-
We Manufacture the
Type
Brass Rule in Strips
Brass Labor Saving Rule
Brass Column Rules
Brass Circles
Brass Leaders
Brass Round Corners
Brass Leads and Slugs
Old Column Rules refaced and
cost.
Please remember that we are
and are sure that we can make it greatly to your advantage to deal
with us.
A copy of our Catalogue will be cheerfully furnished on application.
Philadephia Printers' Svpply Co.
Manufacturers of
Type o.nd High Grade Printing Material
Proprietors 39North Ninth Screet
PENN TYPE FOUNDRY PHILADELPHIA
Oapt. J. W.'Fry, Pres.
E. Caldwell, Jr., Secy.
The Greensboro
Company.
Organized 1905. (Legal Reserve)
$100,000 Paid Capital. $25,000 Surplus.
Writes all ordinary forms of contracts. Each
policy is registered and secured by Treas. Dept of State.
4,uuu,uuu reacn irees
Tennessee Wholesale Nurseries. June Buds a Specialty.
No agents traveled, but sell direct to planters
at wholesale prices. Absolutely free from dis
ease and true to name. Write for catalogue and
prices before placing your order elsewhere. We
guarantee our stock to be true to name. Largest
Peach Nursery in the World. Address
J. G. HALE. Winchester. Tenn.
P
rarieties of Fruit,
eaeh:G4 half-tone
Send fiOrts. for book (post -
book bv mail within 60 dara snd
Rebate Ticket with $12 order for
payment on tout order snd yon keep
S O- lnirof
TT U- nnnL weekly snd want more home snd trsreling salesmen. OurriT
IV 6 i fly LaSil FBI. Stark Bro's, lOmUNA. ., Atl(lc,lw, Firrttrvilte, Mu
Printers.
Very Highest Grade of
Brass Galleys
Metal Borders
L S Metal Furniture
Leads and Slugs
Metal Leaders
Spaces and Quads
6 to 48 point
Metal Quoins, etc.
made as good as new at a small
not in any Trust or Combination
R. R. Eing, Vice. Pres.
Life Insurance
KERUBTBflBDOS
with concise description snd season of ripn-
views of Nurseries. Orchards. Picking Houses, etc
Daid) snd Rebate Ticket permitting return of
we refund the 50. Or, mail as within 1 year,
nurserf stock sod we will credit $1.00 in part
ths book free. WE PAY TBS FREIGHT.