THE ALAMANCE GLEANER,
VOL. 6.
IHE GLEANER
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«(11l SOVEICV.TIGNT.
Officer* of the Frdcral Gorerumfil.
THE EXECUTIVE.
Jtutherfo-il li. Hayes, of Ohio, President of
ihe United States.
William A. \\ heiler, of New Yelk, Vice-
Prraioent of the United Stats
J Tilt CABINCT.
William M.Evans, of N> w York, Secretary
of Slate ' 1 *
John Sherman, o! Ohio, S-c'y. of Treasury.
Gci ige W M M -Crur y, 8»-erpiary of War.
liichanl W. Thompson, ©f liiriutuatj Secre
tary of the Navy;
Carl Shurz, of Missouri Se'v. "f the Interirr.
Charles Deyeiiß, of Massachusetts, Attornej-
Oeiieral.
David M. Key, of Ternnessee, Pos'.r. aster-
General.
TIIK JI'DICIAIiV,
THE SLTRKME tX>L' ttT OF TIIK UNITED
STATES.
Morrison R. Wait, of Ohio, Chief Justice.
Nathan Clifford, of Maine,
N >ah H. Swayne, of Ohio,
Samuel .1. Miller, of lowa,
David Davis, of Illinois,
Stephen J. Field, of California,
William M Strong, of Pennsylvania, .
Joseph P. Bradl-y, of New Jersey,•
Ward Hunt., "f New York, Associate Justices,
wit mTK tJOVKitrvtiEwr.
EXKECL'TTVK DEPARTMENT.
Thomas J. Jarvis of Pitt, Governor.
Ltawcs L. Robinson, of Maeou, Lieutenant-
Governor.
W. \j Sauiidirs. of Xew Hanover, Secretary
of State.
John M. Worth, of Randolph, Treasurer.
Douaid W. Bain, of Wake. Chief Clerk.
T C. Worth, of Randolph, Teller.
Dr. Samuel L. Love, of Haywood, Auditor.
Tlios. S. Kenan, of Wilson, \ttorney-General.
John C. Scarborough, of Johnston, Superin
tendent of Public Instruction*
Johnston Jones, of Burke. Adjutant-tteneral
J MeLeod Turner, Keeper of Mi' Capitol.
Sherwood Haywood, of Wake, State Libia
rlau.
J (IBICH RV,
SUI'RKMK COURT.
W. V. 11. Smith, of Ifettford. Chief .Justice.
John H. Dillard, Thos. S. Asho. Associates,
W. H. Bagley, of Wake, Clerk of Supreme
Coii't.
D. A. Wicker, of Wake, Marshal.
1 ROFESSIONAL CARDS.
JNO. W. GRAITAM. JAS. A. GRATIAM.
Hillsmro, N. Graham, N. C.
GitAHAW & GRAHAM,
ATTOKNEJVM AT I-AW.
Practice in the f'tate anil Federal Courts,
tl attention paid to collecting.
J. D. KERNODLE,
Attorney
«VA.RA.n. IX. C '
Practices hi the Stat© and Federal Courts.
WUI faithfully and promptly attend to all busi
ness intrusted to liim.
& m. MASSES,
ATTORNEY,
OIIAUA.V, IV. V.
Will attend regularly the Superior Courts of
Alamance, Caswell, Person, Chatham and Kan
uolph, and the Federal courts at Greensboro.
Business entrusted 10 him'shall liave faithful
attention, '*-* - .
fr—l 80. ly,
T. B. Eldridge,
Attorney at IL&w,
: GRAHAM, N. C.
_ husicesf iutrislbd to - hiui shall receive
prompt and careful attention.
James E.Boyd,
ATTORNEY AT LAW.
1 OFVICG9 A.T
Grakam St €re©hsbero.
Practices in all the Courts.
al Graham. Monday, Tncsdav and
•ud »aft y . At thursd a£, Friday
Orj.W, Ciiiiffitli
den TI /
GRAHAM, N. C.,
to do acy and all kinds of
8-tJui mn^. to * h « profession,
1 attention given to the treatment of
OF UJC Mourn.
ALLJB ATTWDBD N TOWN oa COUHTBT
Q'.H. School,
GRAHAM, N. 0.
Jn -iuff«»t and doses the fol
'"•'f»B^J? lI,OD $3.50 and *4-50 per month.
ii>4*DU 1(2.r j f cr mouth. The number of
Bk * limited to 13. I
» RAH AM, N. C., MONDAY. SEPTEMBER 27, 1880
o e t
WllltUf
Spurn the woman she is guilty';
last the man go ffee;
She is sinful, IK; but human,
u 'e eat. all agree.
This tlici verdict that we renter
1 " the courts beVi.v,
Never askhg: 'U,) i„ Ixaven
Says the Master so?'
We can li'-ien all unheeding,
1 o her plaintive IUOA II ,
To liei frantic, hopel'ss pleading
And her 1 \ in:r groan, '
l'or the sins of fallen woman
" t Nothing can. uloli j;
V\ e are si IICKP,' thus we reason,
"* 'Cast we the stone,'
But wi h tender words and glancos
Grte. him, press his hand;
&'lto\v him how much loving favor
lie may still command.
Should he ask us for our daughter,
Gladly we'll consent;
lie is rich his lank is noble,
H'e art well content.
What if hi* his cru-.hed forever
One jjoov bleeding heart?
He was but tba victim of that
Wicked woman's art.
He the tempter, she the tempted,
In the sight of heaven:
Cut on earth for her the judgement,
All to jiim forgiven:
Philadelphia July Hth, 188').
Tilt 1 UHKK l.eAV|{«.
The i!a\ was bitter in Cornwall villa;
as winter da> s most generally are i
iha t Alpine town, and though the su
was bright, its ra» s were as cheerle
and chill us moonbeams.
Wild gusts whistled through (lie street
breathing icicles anil frost in their luii
ous course, and driving everything
away to seek shelter from its biting, pen
e.tatiig breath. And yet not every one
was sheliered trom its pi iless gale, loi
he wlu) had work to do tr Liwincss to
tiansael was summoned by inexotable
du'y to come lorih to hi» pjst, or. else
when (lie da\ ol reckoning came abide
tliC consequonccs.
Dui, with Mich exceptions as Ihese, tin
male population generally sought the
warm and friendly atmosphere of the
drinking saloons where ' hot Scotch,''
and a glowing lurnace they managed to
keep themselves from freezing.
Ol these luckless exceptions Abe Den
ning the baker, was one. In sunshine
or slot in, hail, rail., or snow, people
must eat —cai in fact all the mote vora
ciously because it does not ruin or snow,
as if to perpetrate- -an unreasonable j >ke
upon Ihc baker, \vh > especially in ap
petizing weather, must see lo ii that his
customer's larder be properly slored
with the raies and best otlheproductions
o! his oven.
Even biicli weather ns this did not dc.
ter Mr. Dinning Irom attending to thi
want* of customers willi the assihiit)
mid audition characteristic ol his class.
W'lii'c disappearing into h with an
armful ol bread, a girl of some fii'cen
years of age emerged Horn a miner-?
en bin near by, and, fir*t casting a wild
and hiurled glance about her, rushed to
itie bakers cart, and had just abstracted
iherelroin tluce loaves ol bread, ami
VVHS carrying thetii off, when the oakci
returned and caught her in tha a t.
I ufonunatcly an offl or was passing
at the time and lliu baker. on the spur ol
the moment, and without giving the
case that consideration wtiic'i ho other
wise might, gave her in custody 011 the
charge ol then. I in* girl without any at
tcuipl at expostulation ov explanation,
burst into an agony of tens—a sufficient
evidence, pcrlia]*,- that she hut a
novice «tier alt in the art of coaling.
~oh,' she exclaimed, 'do not take me
in ihis way. Let me wrap a shawl
around my head, or the people will know
inc. • . , ; • i i[ ;
Tbe ' ffi es consenting, accompanied
her to tie cabin, white the baker drove
a way, telling the policeman he would b
in Court the next day to prefer tbe
charge before the police Court.
1 The officer on entering louml no one
in tha; cabin but thretf ' ehiklreii-ttae
yonrtgert abtml 3 years Old ftr.d the eldest
6 The hut was cold and cheerless: tliore
wa« no fire.' The two cider childien.
alarmed at the presence ol an officer, ex«
hibiied discolored eyes and faces, which
bore evidence of suffering and recoil
tears: while li«He Willie the youngest,
was crying 'and 1 inappeasable, moping
aimlcsply around the cabin, looking into
the empty closets and putting his hands
mechanically into the empty disbes on
the tablo.
• What made you steal the bread, my
aii l i' asked the officer.
At the mention of the word 'Dread ,
little Willie looked tearfully and pilifully
„ the inau's face. The girl bugged the
lit'le tellow frantically in her ar~s, cov
Lin?/ liiin with tears and kisses.
'Oh iriv poor lit'le brother!' she cued
bit te.ly!"' What nil! become of you now?
This njiin in going to luko youj Lena
away with him.
Hem the child threw his arms around
her neck as if to detain l v her by fuive,
while (ha other nvo children screamed
fit to break their hearU.
'J he officer, suspecting the actual state
ol 11 ii• ij»s, began too convulsively;
hut instead of applying his hand to his
chest or l:iroat, as people u-u.illy do no
stub occasions, he applied his haudker
eiiief to liis eyes.
•Is iLeic no coal or nothing at till to
cat in this house? said lie in a gurgling
•ort ol voic Ct
'No coal, no bread, nothing to eat!' ie
:>!ied the girl wringing her hands, 'an I
poor vVilhe and the rest of ns have had
nothing at all to cut since jesterda;
morning,
Here Ihe ofiiier had anot her hard (ii
of coughing, and went away saying that
ue would be Uaok in a short time.
'ls the man gone foi bread? Asked the
• Ideal ol ihe children.
'llush, Molfie, dour' said Lena. I
■ IOII'I know what lie has gone He's
not a bad man anyhow tor lie has uot
arrested me, as, I thought he would.
In a very few minutes the -fli rer
turned, with his wins full of bread and
groceries, not forgetting some cakei
and condi'iicnts tor the smallest children
while another man at his heels carried a
sack of coal on ids back.
At the si;- hi of die bread (lie children
screamed with delight, while the effieer
now laughed, now coughed, and fre
quency applied his handkerchief to his
tace to wipe off tha perspiration, as it
were.
While Lena cut up large slices ot bread
aid helped the childven and herself, the
iwo men set to work and ur\de a large
lire in the stuve, the glow ot which soon
dillused warmth and comfort through
ihe cabin.
Tlicy cooked the mca), und made lea,
a id spread u steaming meal oil the laid*
for iku Tour orphans while they oarved
uii! attended to their wants nutil thoy
were fully satisfied.
Happy, happy childhood, whoso pre
rogatives are innocence, inin I* and j>>l
I lie children af'er (heir dinner di I net
ook like the same children at all. Their
aces were bright and joyous, happy ami
Handsome and in a lew mi miles they
were playing anil laughing aiul romping
as happy as if they Ind never fell the
pangs of hunger,
•And now,' Paid the offi :er delighted
al seeing the children so happy,'oil down
and answer inv a few questions. Ilavo
you no father or mother?'
•We have no mother,' was Lena's re
ply. She died about a year ago, and
inlher went to Eureka to work about
eight months ago, aiul we hain't seen
him ever since that time.
'What was your father's nanie?'
'Dawson—Jim Dawaim.'
And lias he sent yon no money—noth
ing?.
'Nothing. Never lieird of him since
he went away lint when he wan going
lie left us a bag offl >ur and lots ol
cries and things, as much as would las 1
us lor six mouths, auJ he'd be sure and
be b«ck before the provisims would be
ail out.'
'And you gol 110 letter from him at
all?'
'Not one,' replied Lena with a deep
sigh.
Poor Dawson had written to his chil
dren, however, but postal communica
tion being at that lime very irregular
and uncertain in tl>e silver State, the
children did not receive his letters.
' Well, I must go now,' sai.l the officer,
after a pauso, 'but 1 will cull for you 10-«
morriw and you'll bare to accjtnpany
ure to the police office, lor 1 must do ray
duty, you know. Good bye.'
Ami Lc tu Dawson was lefl with
her little brother and sister. She felt sad
and lonesome after the departure ol her
kind benefactor, but the buoyancy ol
childhood eoon gained the ascendancy,
aid before bedtime the orphan* were as
hippy a l * fcny group ol children iu Coru
wall village,
Meantime the report about tho steal
ing of the bread'and UKJ des'.Uuie con*
dition of the children got abroad. Jim
Dawson, a miner himself was well
'known and popular among (bo m.ner*,
and lhe case created eucb sympathy and
elicited so many rcroinl*cences and
commentaries that quite a crowd was
| attracted tho" next day to the Police
Caur:.
Judge Moses presided. Tbe
boro tbe of being upright and
honest, kind, boncvolcnt, and it fault
he had at *ll it was thought to be a
somewhat uncompromising rigor iu
the di«ehaif eof hi* duties. It was bard
to say how the case wou'd go. .
• Alter the transaction oi some prelimi
nary business the cu«o was called. The
baker swore to the stealing of the bread,
.v:d identified the defendant as the thiol.
The  ffi :er tcßtiftud to Ihe famishing con
dition in which ho found the children,
but Kjiii ii'd a syllabi'.) about what lie
had done to 're. lie to tln'in.
I'oor Le*a stood trembling before the
Judge; thercnpin a mi'ter nulled
through the crowd and stood before Ihe
bench, eyeing the wi h a deprc
citlng look.
'I declare to the Almighty, Judge,'
slid he, 'I never knowed the fate of Jiui
Dawson'* children and if t did—'
lie dropped a twenty i.ito Lena's trsm«
bling hand.
'You jest knowed a« much about it as
other loikV exclaimed another mitier,
ex-iiedly, walking up and iritting anotlj-
Cf into the girl's hand with an
indignant air that flung back any latent
snspidiiia that he knew anything of the
children's distress any mors than any*
body else.
Here Long Alee so called on ac>.
count ot height and six:—slid timidly
and bashfully up to LciptYside.
'Leedy,' he said >n a half whisper, hold
\our pinafore,' and lie slipped two twen
ties into her apron, and he slid back be
hind the crowd into the corner ami hold
ing his hat to bis face glanced timidly
around to seo that he was completely out
of sight.
Then came Wabbling Joe, who was
far more bashful ill MI L >ng Alee, but
put on a bold foce and laughed aud talk
ed loud to make all believe tnat he wa«
not bashful ai all.
'Jcdge,' said Wabbling Joe, laughing
and nodding familiarly at tue Court, to
disarm that functionary of posfiible rigor
in the trial of the case iu bund—'Jcdge,
let the girl slide. She ai I't done nolhiu'
but what you or I would do ii we were
hungi) !'
And pr or Lena was once more flic
recipient of another present.
The Court held down his boad and
smiled gravely ai Wabbling Joe's-
fense of the accused; but immsdiately
ic.-ovei ing gi avily > said:
'Gentleman, lappreciate yourjibcrali--
ly and gencron* sympathy for (lie young
oflender; and I am particularly itnpiess*
ed with tlie ingenioiMdctcusc made by
tny irieiid, Wabbling Joe, —bere a good
iiMtured laugh oscaped the whole crowd;
as il' to put the judge in a good humor —
•ou',' continued his Honor, 'whatever
might be (lie sympathies of (he Conrt ol
ibe sad condition o( the accused, there Is
a public duty to bo fKM-fonned, and (lie
case IUUM thnrelor» proceed. What is
your name, my girl?' aiked (lie Court.
'They call ino Lena Dawson, sir,' wus
lbo reply.*' J'
-•Call you Lena Dawson [ Audi sup
pose L?n* Dawson is your uaine, is it
not ?' observed (lie Judgo.
-'No.sir, it ain't,' returned tho girl.
'M) tHllter died when 1 was only 3 yoars
old, snd iny mother got married to Mr.
Dawson some true afterward. Mr pros
per name is Madeline Winters, but (key
ca'led iue Lona, for shert.
'Madeline Winters! Where weie you
born?' a*ked the Judge.
•In Dodson, sir,' was the reply.
'ln Dodsoul' echoed the Court, in
a voice of still deeper gravity than be
fore.
'And what was your mother's maiden
name, do you know?,
'Madeline Moses, sir,' responded Lena.
'Madeline Mose*L My God! My Cod!
She was my sister V
And Judge Moses, overcome with emo
tion, bowed Ids bead on the desk, while
a torrent of leais fl >wed down his lace.
Just as the crowd in obedience to the
dictates of delicaey, were emerging from
the Police Court, to let Uncle and niece
ludulge the sacred joy of mutual recog
nition, Jim Dawson apt.eared at the
door, haying just returned from his pros*
pccing tour in Eureka, and, with an
innate sense ol propriety that did hons
or to hiaacquaiutances, who wcro all
rejoiced to &co him, was quietly pcrs
milled to see Iris relatives inside.
maiJIO THE BAPY,
(Little Kock Gazette )
'My wife her jn presented m# wid do
tine* boy in dis country,' said black Bill
entering a magistrate'- office, taking oft
his liaf and s'mging perspiration froaj
id* brow xritli a crooked forefinger.
'Yes gen'ci-ncn,* he *er.t an 'do flues
t'.iile i eber seed. An l'se jest got
a i wentv-dollar gold piece right heah
to gin ter dc man ivhat can guess
what 1 lie* named him. Ter kee|> yer
from «f>readin obcr dc whole nnJr»rsc ob
names, I will state dat Idt ie ft Bible
name.' " *' ' >?
'Abraham.' gncsseii some one.
•No ■'ah/
•Paul.'
•So Bab.' *
♦Job.' . ,
'Gneis pgi:n.'
'Nicodeinus.'
'Keep cr cniwin.'
• Abein'cicli.'
•Try me agin/
l'ne gnesiug cea*ed nffer a fiu»', and
finally Bill remarked:
>l Ifez named that boy Judus Escar
ut,'
•What/said the uiigis.'rate.
hotraved our S ;vior.'
•Can't help hit. I>it'g do boy's name.
Judae hcz been slighted. Nobody hoc
ebber had do immoral emu-age to name
• chile for c)at roan. Hub. flat ain't do
main reft on why I namfrf him Jntlus.
I'jc got d& Bible tor 'stain inc in gibin de
clii o dut iiHine.
'Mow does tlx; IJihle sustain you in de-. 1
firing to perpetuate that name?' Asked
ihe magistrate.
'llits d>B tnek: Chris' in remarkiu' of
Juilas, saiil, dat hit would hah bin better
I'ur dat uian ef he hadn't utbber bin
b >rn.'
'Well.'
'An consklerln how irany -moufs is j
opened at de doo when I goes home wid j
a sideob meal, it would l.ab bin better
fur dat boy ob mine ef lie had ncbtr
seen de daylight. I knows what I'se
talking about. I takes de Scriptur frnm
tie reference. In do future, ef I finds
ilat de boy hez made any improvement
on hisßclt, don I'll change his name ter
Jim.
CATS AND DRIED PKACUEI.
Down at Howell tbe ot her day an old
women about seventy years old boarded
a Detroit, Lansing and Northern train to
come to Detroit. Her baggago consisted
oj a large covered basket, and she
wouldn't allow any hand to Uke it from
her. She bad scarcely got seated when
•he passengers wore startled by a loud
'Me-ow 1* in the car, quickly followed by
a "por-wow' and other 'wow*' too nu
merous to mention. While all were
searching to discover the cat the old lady
sat stiff as a poker and looked straight
ahead at Hie stovepipe. The sounds con
tinued,. and a passenger finally peered
around until he located tbe cat iu lier
buskct.
'Madam, arc you taking that cat from
one comity to another?' he asked.
•'Whit cat? she nnapp-jd.
•Don't you know thai uivler the iaw»
of this State,' he went on, 'a person who
removes a fullsgrown wit from one coun
ty lo another, without the writlen per«
mission of thg Swamp Lind Couiinb
4ouer« W liable to a fine ol $100?
•'Oonl lands! but i didn't know that?*-
ahe exclaimed, as she laced afouml.
" Woini'ti don't keep tracks of the laws
as men do," he said. , 'Personally, I'd
like to see you take that cat through to
Detroit, but I here may be some one on
ihis train just mean enough to inform
against you ami havo ydo arrested. I'd let
her o.ut-M 1 were you.' ; ,
' Ves, 1 wi'l, tor 1 don't want to break
any laws at my age.*
She fumbled around the basket 'for a
minute, and all of a sodden a cat jumped
out. Sbo alighted on the head ot Uic iua:i
who put up the pb, gave hiiu severnl
sharp uigs, and then leaped from one to
another line a squirrel, bidng, spitting
and clawing as she went. Everybody
rose up and but the
old wouian. She sat like a sialoo, alraid
of being suspcclod. \Vhen the leline had
gone the length of the car she turned to
an open window and shot out like a buN
let, landing right-site up and making
trucks frr a bam in a field.
'Who brought tliecat abiard? I de
mand the mi ne ol the iicis-jii w ho owned
the cat I' shouted a tnnu whose head had
lelt tier claws until Uie blood run. >. -i
JNo one answered. Several passengers
looked st raight an ho old woman, who
StoOti it lor a minute and then lifted up
Iter basket and called.
"If an) bo ly wauls to look among ihe
drijid peaches in ibis basket h>r rata be
can do sop ou needn't aU look at me as il
i lived in llio *'ood» and didn't keep post
ed on law!'
■ ran bibi.K.
(From the Washington Star.) ,
Tlie revision of Jie Bible, which has
just been completed in England, has
been in progress tcu years, and the
most loarned biblical scholars of tbc
world have tajtcn part in it. The' work
has been in charge of tne Queen's prius
tvir, who has borne be expenses aiouunt
ing to over SIOO,OOO. Under tho British
laws none but Ibo Queen's.primer is al
lowed to publish the Bible, and thus this
will give him a monopoly iu lite issue
and sale of the revised works iu that
eounlry. But ho cannot enjoy any tuoh
protection in the United Stales because
no copyright can be obiaiued that will
cover this work. Sevcrd j American
publication societies bave Toluntarily
agreed ibat they will not pirate the re
vision, but it Is quite, likely that some
publisher, who is hot, so couscientious,
will seize upon tfiis profitable field of
labor. Kuttirally there ts a groat desire
to tills oouutry to see aud read ihe re
vision, and the first who imt copies or
the new Bible on tbe market will uii
| doubted ly find ready sa'e for tbem.
NO. 31
GIEANLI.GSL
A mn nmst be a mutton Lead to be
always talking about the weaihn\
TIIH STRENGTH of manv |>v)ilici;ti.s lie*
in the tact thut they k- cp Miuu.
I. ToltlyouKo in one of n»u»t know»
men in the country, tLougU to bo
sure he it* a little late.
Lt if ni i angt liow nmch bctt«r a |>has*-
tograplier cao take a jrictnrer to hung la
a show cuse than be cau foi a customer*
'What on earth t;ikes y>« off to jjie
stables no early ever morning latcl}?"
a.«ked a woman of licr litMWml. 'Ciir*
ry hossity."
A ConnecUciflt nan recently natd;-
'L"ud u»e a dollar. My wif>> I,a* left
me, auci 1 Waal :o advertise that 1 am
not respotwiblj lor lier «iebts.
A man w&s wasted in Substance oa
liver stomach tonic* and auti-»
brin remedies, l>m at least concluded K*
trv a shut course of victuals.
It strains a »oaag n»an moro to Itave*
a 140 |K) Jiid tjirl »it ob. Eis koee fifteen
minutes than it does to load bay ->ll daj
day but Imj is perfectly w.liiug to be
strained.
•\Vhat,"«Hyg an inqniaitiye yonng
lady,* 'is lite most popular color lor a
'jriili ?'' vV'e uiay be a lie,le par timltr
is such matters, but we should pr ater *
white one.
A ton of gold 'tnakpsa fraction otc»
half million dollars, and when a m»u
(Hys bis wife is worth bsf weigl.t la
gold, and she weighs 120 jiou&ik »he k
worth $30,000.
* Women,jnotb Jaws, "are tits saLil
of life, at on.e the bo u and a blessing."
'ln on* way they're salad indeed," re
plied Browu; *»bey take so mu.-h time
iu tbeii dressing. _ -
Ac 1 ;htbvopt>&gous CVjh. has be?a
started in N*w York, li is
to rain the rcp.itatioi of any bnsbuad
who goes iijiue late at nigjbt and iriia to
tell >v b--ve he baa been.
A Western girl.viuted a mnste store
aud for ' Tho Heart B.iH !>>»»
witlt and Care," anU 'Wheu |
S wallo ved Ho'ue>ma le JP. ©».** . The
ch-rk nt once ree gn : z tl what the de
sired.
•What's the matter nay dear?* sa«l m
kind wit'e to her husbau 1, wbo had  nfc
for half an hour with bis face buri-d i»
his hands, and apparently in great t.init
iation. 'Oh, I dou't know? l'»a fr)|
like a fool ail day.'* 'Well," said Lfs
wite, consolingly, 'von b»ok tiia
picture of you feeL"
: Hj uiud into tho Morton w;*c a
I UrgteroU wf m mnscript andor bis ar:a
and said very p'ditelr; ' J i,t■. - *
tl« sriflj hero about the beautiful »•!ri
se t yesterday, which 1 would like in.
sorted if you hav i ro >in." '.'kuty of
room Just insert it yourself," replied
the eJitor, gently pushing the waste
basket toward bio*. v
A sJentist says 50,500,000 stars
glimmer in the £rwincene. Will soma
one of our readers please connt lb 1 ? stars
and inform us bow near this scientist
is correct in his figures? if- lbs aouat
can'i be mad.' in oie evening, the enu
merator should make a chtlk ntirk
where he leaves ofT, in ord i to kuow
where tj commence the next night;
otherwise he may count aunyi star*
twice.
The Latin term for rod-liver oil is
'oleum iaeoris asHli." A doctor pre
scribed it for *n old ladj th > other day,
arxl, M usuul, in * his presori|nu>i> »b«
brevi&tod th» terms, yrliich n>»d, 'R.
Ole. As., oz lli." A ot the old
lady congratulated him upon Iter re to-v
ration to health, wh-n shfe *»M, 'VM,
it was that beautiful iuedi>;iue, the oil
of jackass, that brought me ti> wv lecW
Frcdiroan 'Pioaae, sir, did I pam
ia—?" I'rofussor—'Wi.ll, DO, J'N» SOR
ry to Mf yon il til n't quite come up to
the mark." Freshman—'Thank yon,
«ir w f«n I Starts out shilling alf over, aa
if hiubly l«!ighlt'd). Professor—•*Ex , »
CUBB n)f, Mr. , I'm afraid you
misHoJorttood me. I *«' d yon badn'fc
pass d." Freshman- —'Ob! N 1 iluu't
care anything about that, I've wuu my
oot aU (be same.'
'What IgjM is large eaougb to C&rry a
man?'
A littlt girl bold up her bund, aad
B*l ( J * -
'1 know; a lark.' '•*■ '
'On, noT said tbc teacher; Marks urs
not large to carry man.' . ;
'Xcs, they arc,' said, the youngster.
'My p*pi» goes away for two or three
duya, aud my jniuua says Wa gone off
ou a larlfc
Said the distinguished Chatham' to
hi» «oti; *J wtrtild have inscribed - 1 - upon
tli» curtains of yotir bed, and tho Walla
of yonrr chamber,'lf you ik> nit vise
baily, y6h canuot malt«* progress to any-.
'":hing If jou do not net apart your
j hours. of reading, if you suffer yourself
.•ir HBV uoh fixe to break in upon the us,
r>oir d*ya will slip through your UanJa
' unprofitable aud uceujoyod bj jtouT*
1