North Carolina Newspapers

eliidiciolis &dvci: "Keeping Everlastingly at it success." -, RATES FURNISHED 03 aPPLICATIC.'I. I Job Printing. t All kinds Commercial Print ing, Pamphlets, . Posters, & c., neatly and promptly executed at lowest prices. Mj AMANGE : V.- The Oldest Newspaper iu tbs County.:: Established In1875. $1.00 p;T Year In Advance. Large nwl increasing "ciicula- 'ij.1 in" A In m'a.no;.'.And,.-adiomirinr LEANER. i-ountics-.a point for ndyertisers. VOL. ' X.X V GRAHAM, Nf a, THURSDAY, AUGUST 24, ,1899. NO. 29. HE; nn LA DIES' low and high cut Sl.TjO DS.Try Davis' Easy Shoes A. L. DAVIS, Manager. PROFESSIONAL CARDpy - JACOB A. " LONG, 4 Attorncy-at-Law, GRAHAM, n. c Practices in the State and federal courts, ontco over Wh its, Moore it Co. 'a storo. Main Birtwi. 'Phono Ho. a. ... ' . . ... lOHIt (J BAT BYHUM.. -, W. 1. BVHUM, Jh. BYNUM & BYNUM, Attorney and Counselors at Luw ' GUEKN8BQ1U), N. C. Practice regularly in tho conrts of Ala mance countr. Aug. 2, 94 ly DK. J. ' Sl'OCKAIO . . Dentist, . . t . . GRAHAM N. C. : Office, at residence, opposite Most work at reasonable prices. In office Mondays and Satur days. . . Woman a- CafyJKBovm what so Bering from falling of the womb, whites, painful or Irregular menses, or aay disease of the distinctly feminine orfraaaia. A man Barmn. thise or pity bat he can Dot know the aconle ahe ea throngs. tb terrible suffering, i fob her of so patieawy borne, which oeatuy, nope i M. snflvTirig Yet mUr fa McOJlETS will banish It This tneffldne caret afl "foinale disease "quick ly endpermnnently. It does way with humiliating physical exaau natiooa. Ths treatment may be taken at homo. Then is not con tinnal expense and trouble. The sufferer is cored and Jiayt cmrtd. Wine of Cardniia beuourius; the leading remedy or all trouble of this class. It easts but t from aay druggist -.--,..-.-. ' For advice ip case Vieflufatog special directions, sddeessyytb ''Ladies Advisory Department.'' The Chattanooga Medietas) -Ox, Chattanooga, TenaL . . , . ,. '''J -C.f -'T1 WK8T, Mash vflle, Tsna- wrlua Tata wmmnlia la.iln im niwlif my wa a tana ass si' The State Nor College of H. aial - ud C" - Indsuttrial Offers to young women thorough literary, classical, scientific, and in dustrial education and ppecial ped agogical training. Annual expenses $90 to $130; for non-residents of the State $150. Faculty of 30 mem bers. More than 400 regular stu dents, lias matriculated about 1,700 students) representing every county In the State except one. Practice and Observation School of about 550 pupils. To secure board in dormitories, all free-tuition ap plications should, be made before August 1. . 1 Correspondence - invited from those desiring competent trained teachers. For catalogue and other informa tion, address ,', - v ; PRESIDENT MorVER, . fj ,- j : Greensboro, JL C The Citizen says that Ahevllle had two attempts at suicide on Sun day a week. A narro woman jump ed into a well in ten feet of water but was rescued. - A white oman took a doe of laudanum but. got over it Yru asfome no rik when you iuy Chamberlain's Colic Cholera and Diarrhoea Pcmcdy. T. A Al hiight & Co. will refund- your mon ey if you are not satisfied after ns in? it- It is everywhere admitted to be themoet sucoes'ful remedy in Uc for lowcl complaints and the nly one that never fails. It pleasant, mi(u auJ reliable. - 4m. 1 newalaisy laStw rmi ml taw wllk SO 9 . JSU f if T 1 fir 1 r-tr WMt f t? Th.it will ink-rostyou if your feet are in n li:td condition mid you want rt-lief VJCI KID the ..softest leather made Jor tender feet. to 83.00 in black or tan. forTcnder Feet. Big Shoe Store, - -.-i DAVIS ,& DAVIS,, Propr's, Burlington, N. C. , SIM WAS LATE. Vha Clad Old Oeatlesaaa Did'theEx phUnla0 For Bias. They are mlddlo aged married peo ple noWj but their wedding is kept m greener remembrance than that of many a couple since married' in "the same commnnlty. He was a young hardworking farmer oat near the mid dle of the state, she the blooming daughter of a neighboring farmer who I hud accumuiuted a nice fortuuehad a fine truer of land, a pretentious coon- try home and a family that was looked op to by most of the community. He had worked his own way to the front, and there was nothing that be admired more in young men than the qualities that had won him success. So Sim, for that was 'the youth's name, was in the good graces of the father as well as of the daughter On the day appointed for the wed ding the guests moved toward the big house from all directions and in all kinds of vehicles. It was a holiday with them all, . social distinctions in terfering very little with a universal invitation throughout the large circle of acquaintanceship. Preparations for entertaining the assemblage were of the most elaborate and hospitable character. There was more food than -1s ordinarily provided for a regiment of soldiery. There were cider and apples by the barrel, and the mist that poured from the kitchen windows was freighted with appetizing odors. The parson was there, the choir from the little church was there, and a few rel atives from abroad were there to en- Joy the festivities. The bountiful table was set, the bride was dressed, the parson had be gun to move about uneasily, and the good wife, after visiting the veranda several times, called her husband to one side- and talked briefly in a low tone; Then be knitted his brows, scanned the road In both directions and mattered to himself. Before long be" put on his hat, slipped quietly up the. back way and was soon on the roof, again studying the road. There were growls from the kitchen that the victuals were getting cold, and the eonsolina: voices beard in the bride's room did not serve to drown the sound of her weeping. It was a full hour after the time appointed for the wed ding, and the bridegroom hod not ar rived. The old gentleman went about look ing as though be wanted to hurt some one.The mother bravely kept up ap peaunces, and the parson looked at his nnen face watch at least twice every three minutes. The presence of a crisis could be beard in the air, and the general nervousness increased as thu time for it SDoroacDoo. . "Goshr ' shouted a youngster who was whittling at the bone block, "see that fellar ride.' - Every eye followed the direction in dicated by the Dors, suuie otooe sw saw a veritable rough rider dashing down the wooded hill half a mUe away. Even on the steep descent the horse was tuged to bis utmost, and as be straightened away on the level It nitilil ba. seen that be was. croeuy driven. On be came, reeking, breath ing In gasps, bis nostrils distended and his bead straigutenea to hrathlnir. " -film," said the father sternly as the rider threw himself from tne sawue. 'what does this mean? You've upset everything and Battle's a'most craiy. luwnn A MHI. Now, woere nave yuw gaUopln up here like a wild Indian, and the women folks rooet -distracted V "Am I too later asked Sim excited ly. "Just as I got ready I see tnai new notsteln cow I bought break out of the lower meadow, and I went aner oer. sh. mt ma the an flredest chase yon ever heard of. and blamed if I didn't t .hnnt the weddln till I run that 15 ... . ... - k, 1 eritter into Webb's yam aou urn girl told tne the folks bad come over here." Tw . -Cow wae'nt bnrt bob, was she 7" "Not a bit" a , v -Glad of It. That's the way to look after things. Now row eooe right In and get married and let roe do the ex- plaints.'' . o tmA and then was never a BkcfTicr time at aay one's Biairiage- Detroit Free Press, . A PataaC rataw. a nt. wmmbub had a eervaat amed Koran, a rosy eherked girt who received frequent cane mm man. whom she often spoke as -w broth. The eonaHernetkai of her Borah ssMsetd that she was aoosj to marry the stalwart Tim. . - "What do job Bseao, Normal- e taaBded the lady. leeUntt that a poor trick had bee. p-yed have always tjokaw of Tha as yoar wT.-.- said the WhiM Roratt. "I always tboogh of Mm so. ?Lb, whiles he we Baktag .p Us rinTW ke'S bee. bcmli as to Tmind ase. ao 'ass, that he's seJy Ps X-tr.r. bother. fher all I" OASTOnZA. MAKINGDIET ROADS. MODERN ROAD MACHINERY HAS 80LV EO THE PROBLEM. Graders and Hollers Proneslr ITsed Prodoee Bard and DaraUe flla-a-waya Road Taxes Saoald Be. Paid la Cash. . . ' ; The greatest enemy of good roads is water. A road may easily be kept good If the water can be kept oil.. Hence,' the first thing to consider in construct ing a road Is to build It so that the wa ter will run off. This Is accomplished by building It high In the, middle or "crowning" it. and giving "the entire road surface a hard, smooth finish. . Water always runs down hill, and it will readily run off of any road if it be but given an opportunity to do so. The fault with too many of our roads is 'that the water cannot run off. Pass Ing wagons and horses' hoofs are pcr niltted to wear them down until ruts are formed. These hold the water and allow It to sink into the ground, which becomes softened, - So that continued travel makes matters ' worse and worse. - The problem of building roads which will Bhed water has been solved by the road grader or rood machine. The American farmer is quick to realize the value of machinery; and the rapid growth In the use of the reaper, the binder and the separator is an elo quent tributo to the practical genlas of American agriculture. The growth of the use. of road graders has been wonderful, during the last few years and indicates that the farmer has dis covered a practical solution of the problem bow to build his local dirt roads. : : But something mow Is needed to make a thoroughly good road besides a road machine. To properly finish a dirt road made with the use of a grader it should bo thoroughly rolled and hardened. It is not sulllcient that It be crowned, but It should te made hard and smooth. The Aime thiag Is true of gravel roads. Tills can be licet accomplished with the rse of rollers. Horse rollers weighing from five to eight tons arc most frequently nsed for the purpose. All loose stoues should be removed from the road sur face before rolling, as well as sods, turf, leaves, sticks or any other mat ter that will tend to soften the road bed. A road that Is thoroughly and repeatedly rolled is well fitted to stand the wear of travel and can to made Into a perfect watershed. The use of machinery In building roads has been seriously handicapped by Its cost. It is frequently thought wrong that farmers should be obliged to tax themselves for the purchase of road graders and road rollers In addi tion to having to stand the regular road tax.; There Is much Justice In this.'' position, for the average farmer nays his full share of taxes, and these should not be added to or Increased without some very excellent reason. But the farmers of the Uuitcd States are badly In want of good roods, and the clamor for their construction Is aTowlne from year to year. Quite a number of towns have 'solved the road machinery problem by voting-to pay their taxes in cash Instead of worklug them out and nsing a part of this fund for the purchase of machines, which avoids the necessity of levying an ex tra tax for the purpose. This plan has been adopted In New York and Wis consin and probably elsewhere. The town clerk of West Chester, Westches ter county. N. Y, says It bos always been followed there. In the town of Walton. Delaware county, N. X the cash road tax was adopted In 1880. Home years later the taxpayers voted by a large majority against returning to the old system of working out tne tax. James Hill, chairman town of Barn boo, in Wisconsin, reports that In 1800 the town adopted the plan of pay inxr Its road taxes m cash. . He de clares that "per people think we have accompnsbed more the past year under the cash system than we aw in roar years under the old labor system." Similar results are - reported from many other towns in Wisconsin and New York. Road taxes may be collected in casn without hardship to the poorer farm- era, who may desire to. continue work. Ing out their share cT tne taxes as heretofore. Only part of the tax would ever be required daring any one year to pay for machinery, and the re mainder would be employed to Dire men and teams for operating the ma chines. Tliua the poorer taxpayers are given emptoy men t at good wages, ana the towo -officers are In position to se cure a oonars won. m mvwm, cry dollar of tax. which has been ln posalble la many towns under the eld evstem of workine out taxes. This explains the growing popularity of the eash road tax and the fact that few towns bare ever abaivdoned It after giving It a fair trial. Experience nas shown that more can be accotnpilsbed a-tth tl of road tax paid n casn tnan with 2 or even tax worked set ea the highway. This has aaade It porn'.!, to hiekv a l-rge redoctloa In the sBJoent of the lax. - . This matter of paying roso taxes yt tah Is aotnethlng that aboold be left to the vote of the people In each town. It Is raarnllarty a subject for local Bwtne rule. The plan la being nies generally adopted, however, a Ha ad vents res eootlDoe to become better kaowB. It will probably reaolt la the aptteral oae of road fraoers, Bu rn aad also of rock crushing ptosis and la that way help largely to solve the good roads proUein. A Bomber of states tare recently adopted laws as thorhdng the towB boards to purchase road machinery ea time payments. it them bewg MKUigan, new York, Arkansas and Wisconsin. Otto uobstb. Chairman U A. W. Highway Improve ment Commlttr . THE BEST RALVE in the world far Cuts, Bruises, bores, Ulcers, SaJt Rheum, Fever bores, letter, Chapped Hands, Chilblains, Corns, and all Skin Eruptions, and posi tively cures Piles, or no pay re quired. It Is guaranteed to give perfect tisiacti on or money re funded. Price 25 cents per box. For tale by T. A- Alight & Co., druggists. " DRAINAGE OF ROADS. Dnrablllty Depends oa Speedy Re nsovol at Water. 1 In road building the Chief effort should be toward securing tho best drainage, as water and dirt are bound to make mud. A, dry road is usually a good road or will become a good road In time by constant usage, The excep tion which proves the rule is the sandy rood. A sandy road is a dry road, but not often a Rood road, says 8. I). Tall man In The Pneumatic. :.; To assist ' the drainage the road should be first crowned and tlicu about four to six inches of crushed stone, depending upon the. amount of travel, put on, gradually decreasing a little In thickness as It approaches the gutters; then a heavy steam roller passed over it two or three times to set it; upon this about three or four inches of finer crushed stone Bbould be placed and a steam roller passed over It again. A great deal of care should be taken not to have the road flat on top. Tule bard stone dressing forms almost a water proof covering that will last for years It property tnkeo care of each spring by putting on some fine crushed stone. This covering will let the water drain freely to the gutters and leave a comparatively dry road In a few min utes after a heavy rain. This Is very '- da MACHJKK FOtt LOOSEKISO MACADAM important in another way, as It keeps the ground underneath the road free from saturation and thereby makes a strong foundation. , It Is Abe natural earth underneath the coveting that must bear the weight of the road. It really sustains In addition the weight of stone, etc., as well. If this natural soli, or foundation of the road, Is permitted to become satu rated with water, either by water per colating dowu Into it from the surface or from water rising into It from be low, it has not strength to resist tho wheels which at once sink into It, and ruts are formed. But If this soil foun dation is kept dry or nearly so it Is strong and will support any load likely to pass over it. If the water Is shed from the road to the gutters and there remains, the water works Its wsy Into the earth at the foundation of the road and causes the Injury above spoken of. Speaking of the great importance of keeping a road In repair, lot a wagon track, scarcely perceptible at flrst,aftcr a shower stand full of water and soften the road at that spot, another wagon panning along later sinks fur ther Into the softened track, here Is a deeper' bole to bold water, soon It be comes a rut, then the rut develops Into a pitch hole. The soli underneath Is brought up and mixed with surface covering, the surface covering Is bro ken down and forced into the soli. . Here, then, Is a bad road and a per manent weakness, the result of a neg lect to repair the road at the proper time and a neglect to keep, the drain age of tho rood in perfect condition at all times. lew Jersre ttostd Models. - According 4o bulletin No. 00, Issued by the department of agriculture. Now J Jersey ht building more roatis and bet ter roods for the money than any other state In the Tulon. The roads being built there will last and can be kept up to a high standard at a minimum expense. . ,: Bulletin No. W la devoted exclusive ly to aood roads. In It the opinion Is expressed that all the Important roads In the Called State will be macad amised or otherwise Improved within a few years. The bulletin advises the building of atone roads wherever It la possible and condemns dirt roads as much more expensive In the end. ties Bid erf the Mad. ' Mod can Imprison and enslave thou sands of people. . I know certain sea sons of the year where families have been bound and abackled by the mud, been prevented from the enjoyments and privileges of free transit and ut terly Isolated from their neighbors. When we see what a great enemy mod la, the 'first thing to take Into eooato- eratkia In road building is some plaa to avoid mud and build roads that will be tree from mod . IX TaUmaa. J." Oooe Masidat la Ears. Twenty years ago there was scarce ly a mile of good wagoa road la Egypt During the hurt six gears more than ljOU) miles of fine roads have been cvo- stmctrd. fa SCaasaa CH r. " ' In Kansas Ctty waaoo draw tf aae bore ase required to be equipped with three Inch tires and those draws ly two borae with foar inch tires. . WesHatleal Imi eta. k - f4, WHS a snot M faad, ra KB wast re an I woobte't crm. Bat f 4 )aat Be nw Ml I sot a i ! f e fcWS sea -4. A W. Some Chicago mea carry ea at the same time two or more different Unes f bosroessL gomettnies thee eombt aattoDS are la curbs Ue. Over the eVter af a store In WeO street Is a alga which announce "Wbosesale Topcea-fl and School of iUcV " Id the window of aa etOce la Madison street Is aavaav aonnceiBrrrt that wttbla are to be had Books on Love and Poultry Basslng" A Hoots Bide btimnrM has a placard la his basement window which "lBcbea Pwt Tip and Carpets ar' Ikjwo" . " THE DYNAMITE DRUMMER. A Daaseroaa rroreewloa That Briase . lp a (iood Salary. Tho little iiini! who scribbled Illegibly on the SI James register bore an in nocuous name. It was Pink Firkin, Now York. He bore also an innocuous appearance, for he was not more than five feet four In height, with slim frame, narrow shoulders and eyes of the mildest and most appealing tilqc. -: Notwithstanding all this. Pink Firkin is a dangerous man. This dangerous Deaa rises not from the inward man, but from his occupation.- When ho stepped up to the desk to put bis name on the register it was Mlth the most painstaking care that lie placed upon the marble counter a little black bag which be carried In bis left hand. Care fully, gentlx, bo placed It by bis side, and between almost every letter be wrote be looked out of the corner.ef his eye at the little black bag to see If It were really there. "Traveling for a Jewelry firm, I sup pose?" quesUonlngly remarked the professional lounger, who had grown curious. ' ' "No. Dynamlte,M answered Mr. Fir kin, with a faint smile. It was the loiterer's turn to start He recovered himself, and as the rest of the loungers "in the rotunda. Including the clerks, made, rapid exits In both directions, put on a bold front - "OhynaiulteT" ho returned, with a show of unconcern. "Only dynamite. Humph." "Yes, my firm In New York makes the best dynamite In the world goes off at the slightest shock. Great stuff. Want to sec some?" Jnqulred the drum mer, his profesteonal training getting the upiier hand. Ho took tho satchel In his hand with some roughness, and the professional lounger' set himself In position for a quick sprint. Nothing happened, and tho lounger hastily dis avowed any Interest In dynamite. "Yos, It is a ticklish profession,' smil ed the traveling gentleman as lie shov ed the satchel under the lounge where be bad Invited the Interrogator to sit and chat with him. . "A little danger ous and Inconvenient yes, deuced In convenient at times. We hare to lie careful," and his eyes wore a bunted look. "But we get paid for It we get paid for It You would not believe-that. I get the biggest salary of huy man on the road, but I do. . It Is a big risk. and we have to lay up something. Tho companies will not Insure us." - He grasped a thin knee In both hands as he crossed bis legs and con United: 'That Is not tho worst of It Incon venient. Traveling around with this stuff exposes us to all sorts of dis courtesies from hotel managements. Sometimes we can't get rooms In a town for love or money, for people won't have the stuff In tho bouse, and the guests come In a body ami com plain when tbey find out that one of us Is. registered. There are only three In my line, you know. Under those cir cumstances, as we dare not leave our samples, the police station Is the only recourse. I n registered as a "sleeper In a good number of towns In this vi cinity." Ho paused a minute for this state ment to take effect. "Then there are the railroads to buck up against. Some of them have rules sgalnst carrying ex plosives. Sometimes I get caught and then off I go at tho next station or foot It the rest of the way. I am not particularly fond of railroad travel at any rate. With the cargo I carry a wreck is something to bo afraid of. Even the Jarring of the cars oa a rough road makes me so uncomfortable that I have to take up my satchel and pace the aisle to reduce tho sltork. "The one thilur that I fear Is a wreck. If I ever get into one. It means good By to Pink Firkin. Just hnaglno that stuff going off underneath' you!" Den ver Hepubilcau. " - Warns Ussy Tlase Married. There are some very remarkable In stances of people who bare been mar ried a large number of times, and also of husbands and wives who have lived together to an extraordinary age. 8t Jerome mentions a woman who mar ried her twenty-secoad husband, wbor. la his turn, had been married to 20 wlvee. There Is aa Instance recorded In Bordeaux, In 1772, of a man who had been married 16 time. A woman named Elizabeth Nase, who died In Floronos la 1708, had been married to seven husbands, her unit wedding tak ing place when ah was 70 years of sge. 1 ' Numerous eaaea exist all over the world of people who have been mar ried four, five or six times. In 1708 a con4e was living la Essex who bad married 81 years, the husband being KIT years old and bis wife only four years younger. These cases are also not Isolated one, and It la some what remarkable that In most of such Instances when one baa died the atuv Tlror ho died the nrxt day. Cincin nati CBtorcial Tribune, J . - TaarM "Crooatas the Bar." I remember Tennyson,, saying one day. when he was ataoklnsT by the lire. that waa bia greatest time for Inspiration, "bet 1 seMotn write down anything; thousand of lines fleet up this chimney . a Do you know bow be came to write bis beautiful "Crossing the Barf He had bera very 111. and one day, when he waa eoovalearerrt, be waa sitting grnmbHna. Soddedly his aerae said to him. "Yes ssgbt t be ashamed of yoanw-tf, Mr. Tenaysoa: yos oogbt to be expressing your grstltad for your recarvery from a very bad Otoeaa by giving aa aotnetblng, by giving It to the world," He srent out and straightway wrote "Oroasing the Bar.- and brought It to the Dora a a pears offerings London Kews.- aenw Cs sale's Saara Toaerae. Bafas Cboate's throats were aot al ways as good asiarsd as are asoally those of the aaodera n pa estate tire of the family. la describing a party to a salt la which as was eoonari. be sac said: Why does a aot pay back the money he has a ID gotT H Is socfc a Ttllaja that he wouldn't If he could and so Bier of a bankmpt that as 0001401 If be waald.- llr. Choate also sore remarked of a oman, -Phe I a atnaer so, aot a j sinner, f at aa la ear cUrttt; tniMHl THE WAYS WE LAUGH THEY DIFFER A3 MUCH A3 DO OUR VOICES OR OUR FACE8. - While Men Commonly I' so the A and O Style, Woauea Canully Indulge la : the B asd I Brand A Laaah That : Won Napoleon a Hot tie. , Since tho days of Adam, who Is said to have ..Invented laughter when he awoke and saw Eve by bis side, no two people have laughed alike. The laugh Is as distinct' as the - voice. Women laugh differently from men, children from women; Indeed, even tho laugh of a full bearded man is dif ferent from that Which lie laughs when he has shaved. Tho Abbe Damosceul thought be had discovered in the various enunciations of laughter a sure guide to the tem peraments of the laughers. Thus be said "Ha! ha! bar belonged to a choleric person; "He! bet he" to a phlegmatic one, and "Ho! ho! ho!" to the sanguine. And it is a scientific fact that, while men commonly laugh In A and 0," women usually laugh in E and I. Those who practice laughlug to any extent have been divided wittily Into dlmplcra and to know bow charming they can be one has only to go back to Charles Beade's "Simpleton With a Dimple" siiillers, gtiuners, horse laughers and sncorcrs. This Is to lay. down a science of laughing, for which there might have beeu need bad our generals In the late war taken up the Idea of old Bulow, who proposed to form troops, In face of the enemy. In line of battle and order them to ad- and salute the foe with ringing bursts of laughter. "Be sure," said Bulow, "that your opponents, surprised and dismayed at this astonishing salute, would turn about and run off." Perhaps this scheme would not work now, while the present long range ar tillery Is used; but as a matter of fact It Is related that the Mamelukes once turned tall from an assault upon the French In Egypt on hearing tho roar of laughter with which Napoleon's veterans greeted the command, "Form In squares, asses and men of sclenco In tho center." Great men often have fnueled It a part of greatness to refrain from hilar ity. Philip IV of Spain Is said to have laughed only once In his life. That was when his bride. Anno of A nutria, wept at bearing that the queens of Spain had no feet. She took with Ger man lltornlucss on old piece of SiMiuIsb courtesy. As sho was Journeying to ward Spain some German nuns met her and desired to present some stock lugs of their own knlttlug. Tho worthy princess was about to accept the gift When a Spanish grandee of her suit In terfered With tho remark that it would be against etiquette, as tho queens of Spain were not supiioscd to bare any use for stockings, whereat the princess began to weep, understanding, poor woman, that on her arrival In Snln her feet would bo cut off. Lord Chesterfield wtlil, "Nobody has seen mo laugh since I havo come to my reason," and Cougrcvo makes his Lord Froth in tho "Double Dealer" say, "When I laugh, I always laugh alone." Young people and fools hi ugh easily, says an old proverb, which often has proved true. Nevertheless the singer Robert cave lcasonsjn laughter In Paris and In Lon don in 1805, and, so far at least as DUIng his own purso went, with suc cess. Ho held that men sud women could not laugh "decently and sys tematically" without proper training and sold that a person who could laugh only In one touo seemed to dim like one who could say only out and uon. but that a trained laughter should ex press many things. It Is a curious fact that It la only among the French and ainongtbe an clcute that we read of people laughing tbcinselvc to death. We, In our days, must have either more Joke or a dull er appreciation of wit. Zeuxls Is said to have died of laughing at a painting of aa old woman,-his own handiwork. Philemon expired laughing at a donkey who ate so rununitedly the philoso- phers figs that with his last articulate breath, be sent oat his hut glass of win to the beast who drank it with equal enjoyment and thus proved him self, It would seem, not such a donkey after all. II remains true, however, that laugh ter la good for the health. "Laugh and grow fat" Is the old proverb. - Syden ham maintained that the arrival of a clown In a village waa as wholesome aa that of 20 donkeys laden with drugs. Tiasot, the famous French physician, cored consumption and liver com plaints by causing bla patlenta to laugh, and Erasmus, through Immoder ate laughter at the rude Latin of Hut ten's "Letters of Obscure ilea," broke an Internal abscess which bad long plagued him. -Wbefl a man smllca. and much more when he laugh. It adda something to his fragment of life," aald Sterne, who wished laughter eoamerated la the ma teria medica, holding It as a curative of tha earn kind aa coughing, aaee- lng and perhaps vomiting, only much pleaaanter than any of these. . t Throw I na Thla at Cats, "lrs a long time," said Mr. Gllm- arrtoa. "since I've read anything la the papers shoot throwing things at rats. There used to be frequent men tion a boot how mea threw bootjacks, boots, water pitchers, coal scuttle and Are tongs at tbeta. 1 knew a mas my self soce that threw a lighted lamp at a eat oa a fence, ne never toached the cat bot set the fear afire and had to pay 87. "But the cost oca has not fallea alto gether Into disuse. There la a cat la oar neighborhood that walks along tb back fence at night weeping and wan ing la a soanoer anoat distressing to bear. . For a long time these an popular concerts were sot disturbed, but Bight before last we hoard tha aouad of a mighty bkrat spon tb fence. It sound ed Use the crash of aa immense rock It evMeody massed tb est but It end ed tb concert Tb eat dldat cone back that Bight w hop it never wilL How tba snaa got the rock ever there we doa't know. Barely he osver could have throws It that distance. II most hare rtcged np a catapult of some sort A eatarmlt would be very appropriate for the ptirpoae." New York tisv , Greensboro Tobacco Market . ' - ROR HIGH PRICES. . Sold over 5,000,000 pounds last year for ftn average of $7.57 per 100 pounds. - , This is the highest average made by any market in piedmont North Carolina. , " ' "-- -. j . ' ' ... Over $1,260.00 paid out daily to farmers for tobacc during the past year. - 1 - . ' - ' It is the beet market in tho State for the farmer. ' Our Warehouses are large, commodious and up-to-date, whose propri etors stand without a peer as slesmen of the weed. - Every largo firm in the United States and a number of foreign firms are tcjiresented by our buyers. Tobacco centre, nianufecturinir educational centre. Our own manufacturers have a trade daily and must have tobacco. e have the strongest corps of capacity. J " M o want more tobacco and must have it if high averages will bring it. Try us with your next load and be convinced of our merit. ' Greensboro Tobacco Association . ' ERTSUIHL&IXTGE ! i 1 'i"h to call the attention to the fact that the Burlington ) 1893 bythelate firm of Tate There is no insurance agency in North Carolina with better facilities for placing large lines of insurance, that can give low er rales or better indemnity. Only first-class companies, in every ' branch ot the business, find a lodgement in my office. With a practical experience of more than ten years, I feel warranted in soliciting a share of the local patronage. I guarantee full satisfaction in every instance. Correspondence . solicited upon , all matters pertaining to insurance. I am making a specialty of Life Insurance and will make it to the interest of all who desire protection for their families or their estates, or whqwish to make absolutely safe and profit- able investment, to confer with me before giving their applica tions to other agents. OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCj Kotea From the Crop C'lrrnlar. According t-t St;i!ltii inn Hyde's re port for June, with the exception of Oklahoma, t here is not a state or tel- rltory reporting' winter wheat the con dition of wblch Is not below the IS year average. Tlia number of points below tbo Juna average in the principal winter wheat states is as follows: Cali fornia. 1; Ohio and Texas, 7; Tennes see and Oregon, II; Pennsylvsuia, 13; Kentucky, 14; Msrylsnd. IS; Virginia, 17; Missouri and Washington, SO; Kansas. 28; Indiana 27: Illinois, 88, tnd Michigan. 88. ' Tba total reported acreage in oats Is bout 180,000 acres, or seven-tenths of I percent lues than Isst year. The aver tga condition is 88.7 as compared with 118 on Jons 1 of last year and 81. t, the mean of the Jane averages for lbs last 18 years. In the 18 states having 8,000,000 or more apple trees In bearing at the last census the condition on June 1, as com-, pared with the aversgs June condition for tho Isst 18 years, was as follows: New York, 1 above; Pennsylvania, 8 below; Michigan, It below; Missouri, ft above: Illinois, 8 above; Indiana, 8 above; Kansas. 4 above; Kentucky, no difference; Tennessee, 8 above; Vir ginia, 8 below; North Carolina. 4 be low; Iowa, 11 below, and Maine, 1 below. . The peach crop will probably eome II near being a total failure as It ever will com in a country of such vast ex-j tent and inch varied climatic conditions ss tba United States. ' With the excep ti of California, where the conditions Indicate from 15 to 83 per cent of a fall crop, there la not a state that has the promise of so mocb ss two-thirds of a normal crop. Few look for evea a half crop. The Plead lab Motoraaaa. A Bane was dragging a headstrong boy of four years sway from In front of a rapidly approjrhlng car, when the littles fellow droprx-d a tor be carried Ue 'struggled to. get back and rescue the toy, and tb frightened nurse screamed at him as ah yanked hint sway from the tracks. With a smli that would not have disgraced tb face of a saint tb motormaa brought the ear to a sudden stop wlthla a foot of the toy, refusing to run over and crush It "Now, my little man,- be said, "well trait for you." While tb boy caught up his play thing and scampered away with It a woman oa on of the front seats aald to the conductor standing oa the foot board: "That waa a kind act Would a report of it to the company bare any effect 7" "Yea, aald the coodoctor, with a broadgrtn, "If you waat to have the aiaa filachargedr And he rang the bet! to go abead-Ncv York Tribune. rksnrn ed Aattetsaisoa. May I ahoukla't think you'd be feel ing so gay after quarreling with Jack last night Madge But Just think of making up gain! Brooklyn Ufa. Ta-t jouff coapl mart be ig4- TV tbey met bvooi jT No, bat b snKk4 ft pip bow irbfa Uey watX mt ta tt4 rnlag ---Cl.i- ' .,,,.', ( centre, trade centre, rail mad f!fintrc. Iareo capacity and are inereasincr their . ; . buyers in the world for the' warehouse of insurers in Alamance county Insurance Agency,' established in &mrighTgstiirirrthe "xirigry Very respectfully, JAMES P. ALBKIGIIT, BURLINGTON, N. C. fit s. BEST jf - I t:ie NEW , Wheeler & Wilson Sewing Machine WITS Rotary rtftfst, aid Ball Bearings, Easy Running Qair Rapid, &&. Doraible. Purchasers say t ' It runs as light as a feather." . ' Great Improvement over anything so far. -. " ft turns drudgery Into a pastime." " The magic Silent Seweri" AH sizes and styles of aewinjj ma chines for Cloth and Leather, oyThe best machine on ,fait h see it before yon buy. - - ONEIDA STOKE CO. J. M. Haves. Agent. g CTYUSH. RELIABLE ?i 5?r ARTLSTlOss, Bsceaiawaded by I raa1e i tmawaim. ; They Arwaye PI rail Patter; :s. "i N0NETTtli ATA V IViCE :" -5 W I kr MIle-riMI mrm Bold) 1st sorly ;T J ry Cat aytsl laswa Mi (t I ttr Sli-. , If fss si! 4cs she kct tHaa cd S 4rrri t Ot Cent etAdMOsa rncaurcsL THE McCALLCOHPANY. i taste I4S . 14th Street. be Tort : . luvri or-w-va : 1 : 5 I FKtlt Ave, ihk., 4 S- M) Market 3., ha t-mncrco, - - rtosT-C w A A avrfv . brybtc geistirutM tao4c4 : ; CoauiM Beautiful Cnr-M p'jj'ft ', fi tiwaX rates 1- Paurros, i Wjosv. Karxr V ortt. S Areatt pud foe tba mm m ti-sj r g iitf. W-t 4 t prwsjr.ii.rn bmm K. Wf l.nT IBrranj ntatf p.rj f set arm. M-w - k tmr -. pm -5 am isMac j K tv fc I ttiera. 5 Mdrsja THE McCALL CO 14 to m W. M'k St.. rSew rtt IWIIIBW""1'! ' ' Z. T. HADL" - lractical AVatrh llepuirrr. Cole and Flintoin On e r, ( 1 rT - ' 1 a y a very disagreeable rjiBt" a a oujttti i. . - l ort tTfmr St