After eating, person* of ■ Mllous habtt
will derive mat benefit by taking one
of these pilb. V you have been
DRINKING TOO MUCH,
they will promptly relieve the names.
SICK HEADACHE— .
and nervousness which follows, restore
the appetite and remove gloomy fee*.
Ings. Elegantly sugar coated.
I >'• -
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T. •©. OOOZ,
•AHAM N t.
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Second Floor. .....
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. . . DENTIST . .
Graham - - North Carolina
'>FFir!KiN -'MMOM9 BTTTLDINI,
, f i
AOOS A l/INI, J. KLMH.R LONG
LONG A LONG,
rtornoys and Ootinaelora at 1. «
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THE ALAMANCE GLEANER
Heart to Heart
Br JAMES A. EDGERTON
j EVERY MOMENT AM OFPORTUNITY
There are many opportunities to do
good in simple, unostentatious ways
> it sometimes seems that every mo
ment is packed with them.
It la not bard to rise to the big occs
The real -teat come* in rising to the
little occasion*. .
It may be a trifling service, a small
kindness, a helpful suggestion, a com
If our hearts are In tune these thing*
come easy to us.
The beauty of a right word or deed
is that It helps both giver
and the receiver.
It baa power to multiply Itself Indefi
It makes the. smile a little brighter,
the' hand clnsp a little Warmer.
Thds It passes from one to another.
Like thf pebble dropped In the ocean,
tjie wavea go" eat to the' veTy'shores.
What If no one knows yrho dropped
But does no one know?
Somewhere there must be kept a
Somewhere the Influence of each act
must be measured.
But, whether it is or not, the good Is
That is enough.
It Is easy to say and do the kindly
and helpfnl things if we keep our
selves kindly and helpful in thought
As a man thlnketh In heart so
does be speak and do—at least in the
To those who are keen of sight we
constantly reveal ourselves.
There are unguarded moments when
we show the real trend of onr
The only safe way Is to be right all
Then we peed not seem.
Then we will see and seite the op
portunities to do the tight thing. Fig
uratively speaking, at least, every mo
ment presents such opportunities.
Once past, they are gone forever.
One more chance unimproved!
It would have required such a little
effort and might have resulted In good
beyond our power to measure.
Yet we neglected It
Let u«t>not make the mistake again.
For all the future moments are' ecrs.
We bayc all of us known women
whose lives sweetened and beantlfled
all with whom they came in contact
Perhaps It was a. mother or a wife,
perhaps only a neighbor.
There was no preaching about it
poarihly little' of feproof or admoni
tion. Yet her unselfishness made all
less selfish, her graciousness made all
Such a life Is a light set upon a Mil.
Its Influence none can measure. To
many it pay prove a suggestion, a
hope, an inspiration, who never men
tion the fact Possibly they do not
even recognize It at the time. Yet the
good work Is done.
The writer has in mind one such.
Her name does not here matter. To
give It nilgbt seem personal.
This woman has a husband and six
children, to whom she faithfully min
Yet though her time Is so fully oc
cupied, this does not prevent her from
being a present help In time of trou
ble to her neighbors.
We will call this lady Mrs. B. be
cause tbat Is not the Initial ef her
Recently one of Mrs. B.'s neighbors
was at death's door. The doctor* had
The nelpbltor'a three Utpe children
were taken into Mrs. B.'s home, who
t)ad ample mother loVe for three more.
After beln;? *t the very doorway of
the otber country the neighbor began
almost miraculously' to recover. She
herself believed It was through the
prayers aud helpful suggestions of
Mrs. 8., bet she was admonished to
tell no one.
At about the same time another
neighbor fell 111. and Mrs. B. also wait
ed upon her.
All three women belong to the same
church. The following Sunday the
minister prayed not only for the sick,
but for those attending tbem and tell
ing tbem simply of God as an ever
No one bad any doubt a* to whom
During all iter labors Mrs. B. found
rim* to attend to her cbnrch dntlM, to
her little clubs and to be InteresteJHn
the affairs of bcr town and the outside
"1 was sick and ye visited me."
There are saints In our common life
They make tbeir whole communities
richer and better for their presence.
"Let your light so shine."
The beauty of all this Is that I per
sonally Snow every word of It to be
, THE GOSPEL OP PAUL
Pew more Illuminating books hav*
been written than one recently from
the pen of an Englishman. Coulson
Kern*ban. it la entitled "The Man
of No Sorrotr* ."
The story Is supposed to have bees
seen in a dream.
A new meastab bad risen, sad all the
world rapkil/'Accepted him. .
In London be was received by th«
king end by vast multitudes, who est
aside a feast day In bis honor.
k This bein# spoke of iesas with- lev
setace, bet ssld he* was mistakes Is j
one thing and tbat tor nineteen eeatn
rise men bed persisted la Ms mistake
-tbat Oed is not a Ood at sorrow and
regret*, these belonging to finite na
ture, bat tbat be la a Oed of love and
Joy. The new prophet came to correct
thia mistake and to remove from mea'* !
shoulder* the burden of tbe eross.
The people beard gladly sad accept
ed Tbey gave themselves up
abandon of Joy. At Brat tbey were
content to devote tbefr Ores to level
and franting, bet Joy ta a few months
changed to pleasure seeking and flnal
j ly to sensuality Men and woman were
- . ... _
GRAHAM, N. C M THURSDAY, MARCH 13. L 913.
ca-Toeued. and the .mer - Deuu(y va*
lost from their facea. -
The rnan-of no sorrows attempted to
save the world from the doom he hud
unwittingly brought upon it. but de
spite bis efforts It fell Into greater
depths of nnclean living and of woe.
Then to the man of no eorrowa came
the apirit of the Man ef. Borrows, com
forting bim in this great disappoint
ment and teaching him the goapel of
pain. "Borrow of God'* sending Is the
loving hand touch of the great Physi
cian upon a wound tbat be must probe
The mistaken prophet then returned
to tea£ the gospel of the Nasarene,
and the dream passed.
Those who suffer pain—and who es
capee?—look at it with such shrinking
if it concerns themselves 4hd such
sympathy if It afflicts others that they,
seldom see the philosophy behind It
. Yet pain is but nature's method of
telling ns that there is something
wrong with our physical being. So
sorrow may be the method of telling
us that something Is wrong with our
moral or spiritual being. ' Sorrow and
pain are finite, of course, but they
arise from failure to live In barmOny
with the laws of the absolute.
Whether wp see the truth or not our
sufferings and griefs are directly or
indirectly brought by ourselves.
Sorrow and pain are a refining fire
in which the gold of character Is pu
HURRY AND EFFICIENCY.
It is not the man making the most
motions that does the most work. It
Is the man who makes every move
The giant dynamo which turn* the
machinery of a city makes little noise
It moves almost as* quietly a* the mil
verse. Yet it never misses' n stroke,
and its every stroke is power. _
A bluebottle fly on a wlndowpaue Is
certainly Industrious, also uolsy, but
he gets nowhere. Moreover, lie never
learn*. The same fly will buzz at the
same pane as often as be hnppeus on
the wrong side of it
The trouble Is tbat be laqks brains
If he bad even a glimmer of lutein
gence he would find *ome otber wa.v
out of hi* difficulty.
In a modified degree W tlila not also
the trouble with those who make too
many motion* and too much noise
about their task*? Of course bustle is
all right if It gets anywhere. But there
are people who fly hither and yon.
stew and worry tbeir beads off nnd get
little or nothing done to show for It
There are other way* to work besides
with onr hand* or feet—with our heads
for example. Tbat 1* what our heady
Lincoln had a way of stripping every
question down to Its essentials. lie got
at the nub of it and decided that He
accomplished much without seeming to
On vital thlqgs be was very slow and
painstaking, yet historian* now agree
that, generally speaking, be acted at
the right time.
He bad time to chat with bis friends,
even to tell stories, yet tbe presidency
of tbe United States Is a most exacting
Office and never more so than during
our great civil war.
Lincoln kuew tbe secret of making
every move count
It Is that which tells tbe story of ef
ficiency. Move quickly, of course, but
Tbe great business bouses of our own
day are developing that same kind of
efficiency. Tbey move with the pre
ciston of gigantic machines.
Tbe men wanted by these big bouse*
are those thst work with their head*
—men that know tbe most about tbr
business, men tbat find' new ways tc
draw trade, to eliminate waste, ti
cheapen production, to cut corners.
The man who has bis beadwork prop
erly organized will not make false
moves. He will not be a human edl
tlon of a bluebottle dy.
REALITY AND COUNTERFEIT.
Some people object to the word
"goodness" or say tbey do, but down
ta his Inmost beart there Is no buman
being who objects to tbe reality of
what that word means.
What be does object to perhaps Is
the way in which the term U used
and the character of some who use It.
In this he Is st leaat partly right
Tbe way to preach goodnes* ts to
live it That is infinitely better than
all tbe words about It An ounce of
good worka Is better than a ton of
good worda. Tbe change of one letter
here means all tbe difference between
promise and performance. .
The trouble with many who talk ol
goodness Is that tbey do It In a way
that sounds like a reproach. That is
net goodness. It 1a self righteousness
Others one tbe word as -a cloak
Tbey are hypociitaa.
Yet let os not msk'e the mistake of
rejecting the right because some hypo
crite loudly professes It We musi
ealy learn to discriminate betweep the
genuine and tbe counterfeit
Because some oae passes s bad coin
on na is no rsasoa that we should
thereafter refuse good money. Be
cause one chair breaks under na Is n»
reason that we should resolve nsrer tc
at again. Because one friend peeves
false Is as rsasoa thst we should con
clude thers is no true friendship. Be
cause there are some hypocrite* Is no
reason that we should reject truth or
The world Is as full of goodnes* as It
Is of sunshine. In bis heart of hearts
every one wants to be good.
I want to be good, and I have no
false shame In saying It before tbe
world. I Can Car short of tbe mark,
bet this Is only stumbling In tbe path.
Despite ell the missteps, there ever
tfags a little song la my beart "I
| waat to he good, I want to be good."
| Ho do roe. Now, honor bright, don't
We may not agree In alt-oar stand
ards; hat. according to oar own lights,
we want to do tbe right thing.
Of course we do.
I Wed, then, lefs do it Why not?
But let's don't talk shout it; let's
One being who lives goodness has a
better effect on otbem ttiwn a thou#and
ssrtDoas. I know this because I hsvs
seen It work, sad yea know It
The goodaeas *t—» l« Miked abont Is
VLIVU • ' .-. IT I fit. 1)111 lilt* gUWDWI
that la lived ia t lie true coin.
I A YOUNG PATRIOT.
Dear Mr. Prealdent Taft-I am the llttl*.
. boy who you waved at when you were In |
Marshall, Tex., and I waved back at you '
I never will forget how you looked. You
1 are the only president I have ever aeon. ,
I am (even yea re old. 1 live with my |
' Iran(lma. My little mother went to heav
, en when 1 waa Itf teen deye old. I haw
no brothers nor eletera I would like to
I get a letter from you written with your I
own dear hand I hope that you will not
dlaappolnt me. I know the namee of all
I the presidents and the year In which they
served our country. With best wishes for
your future. I am sincerely yours.
*GEORGB LANI CORELT.
Honey Orove, Tex.
TUe above touching letter wan r«-
.! celved by Mr. Taft at the White HOUR*
! | only a few weeks before be waa ached-1
, uled to lenve office. Needless to nay. I
the lad had Ills wish, for he received
f not only a letter' written by the presl
. dent's own hand, but an autographed
, photo. The boy's letter will be kept
. among the Taft mementos.
t / There Is one thing In tho childish
I missive that should be taken to heart
, by every bc.y In the land. Although
, but seven, he knows the names of all
our presidents nnd the years of their
r inauguration. Probably be also knows
r other things about them.
There could be no more helpful or in
, spiring study to any boy than that of
the lives of onr presidents.
In nearly every case these presidents
were themselves poor boys who won
their way to our highest office by sheer
I merit—ability, honor, service to their
, They Were all good men. After the
clouds of partisan passion have clear
, ed away we can see this. No country
In history ever had a line of executives
whose character WHS SO uniformly
high and unblemished.
Moreover, some of them were very
( great men.
! Washington and IJncoln compare fa
r vorably with the greatest figures of
• any time or ciliue.
j There are others of the second rank,
but little behind these--Jefferson and
Jackson. Grunt. Cleveland, McKlulej
and others. Of those yet living there
Is too much difference of opinion and
partisan heat for them now to be
given their true rank llut history will
' assign them their places.
' Of ail the twenty-six who have held
' thia lofty |*ost one thing can be said
' that should give us infinite pride:
' There has never been a stain on their
Their home lives have been clean.
- They have been free from scandal.
' tf you would learn patriotism. If you
would discover the rond to since**,
study the lives of our preKlileuls,
When you want to buost a friend don't
' tell him how Rood he la; tell others.—
» Washington Post.
That is line—a sermon In ■ sentence.
1 ' Your telling him may give him self
confidence and may give him a swelled
bead. It stunds about the same chance
of doing hum as good.
f But there Is no mixed or doubtful re
( suit about telling U to others. That
( can only result In doing bini good.
Eacirof us can- remember men who
I have been started upward by that sort
' .Borne one drops an. incidental re
"Hello! There's young Brown. He's
1 maklug good."
' Just a mental seed sown, but it takes
root and grows.
A fow days Inter Brown's name Is
1 mentioned In the presence of one who
' heard this remark. The associated
ideas work, and be replies:
"Yes; 1 hear good re|K>rts of him."
That seed also falls In fertile ground
Meanwhile the friend Is not Idle. Hy
• chance sentence here and there be
sings Browu's praises. If wise and
tactful Us Is careful not to overdo It.
In a short tline'there is a whole bar
rest of good thoughts and words about
young Mr. Brown.
By and by some employer wants •
man for an Important place.
"What about this young fellow
Brown?" he muses. "I have heard him
well spoken of."
He Investigates, and If he finds noth
ing of moment against the nan all
these words in his favor bave weight
KesuU— Brown receives the offer of
the Important place.
Then It I* np to him. if be makes
good the world Is before blm.
He got Ills chance because a friend
•poke of hi* good points—to others.
That method of boosting, or some
thing very like It, has been used more
than any of us probably Imagine.
Nor tins It been s6t In motion as the
result of collusion. It came about sim
ply ami nafrrally because one man be
lleved In Hunt Iter and wanted to belp
If you would boost your frleud. praise
TIC NAN MTflO STRIKES FIRST.
I have always ob» rved It Is these quar
ter hour* that decide ihe fate of battle.—
I owe everything In til* world to being
always u quarter of an hour beforehand -
One of the secrets of most great gen
era I* is that tlicy strike flrst
Till* wii* true of Napoleon. It was
also true of Gcucftil Grant In oar own
it waa true of Admiral Nelson, the
gmifewt Kng'lsh naval hero.
All of im have to fight battles—lf not
with Imyoneta, then with mnacle, brain
or moral forrea. Competition la a bat
tle. nnd we ara all competing ID ooe
: way or n no! her.
Knergy, promptitude and swift action
i are as iiecemiarr In peace aa In war.
The man wine who goes after ■
thing while the other fellow ia tblnkiog
Of cows*, wisdom and common sense
most be used. But where one man baa .
lost through rashurtw ten hare failed
John Wesley once remarked to a dlia
| tory cab driver. "I have lost ten min
utes forever." That la a loss wblcb
I can never be' repaid. There may be
i other ten minutes, bat these never re
i Moreover If we get la the halilt of
I procrastinating these others will be lost
» in the same way.
I Time la bat the opportunity to
•' achieve. Wa talk of "klillog time," bat
' the phrase u a misnomer. Ail that we |
ki.V Is our own cnauces.
Time to Ihe wise man Is a treasure
to he exchanged for other treasurex
kuowledge. wealth. fame, attainment
I Time to a fool Is bpt an Invitutlon to
> folly, n means of self destruction
Time to the idler Is a bore.
! Usually It Is safe to Judge a man
I hy the value he places on time—ll Is
u reflection of hla own real value.
Time is tfie oue thing we cannot
I hoard. We mu*t use It or it es a|ie* us.
Rome poet, has said that opportunity
knocks but once on each of our doors,
but In reality every moment Is an op
Time Is the great'democrat—lt comes
alike to all. But. neglected, thlvhour
uow—returns no more forever. ,
I To a Napoleon. Nelson or Grant a
I qunHer hour means the difference
• tween victory and defeat; to all of
ua it may mean the difference between
success nnd failure.
HARTTRS OF SCIENCJC.
The other day Dr. Paulln Mery, for
mer deputy for Purls, died as the re
ault of mi oiieratlon at the age of fifty
three. ' c.
The operation waa on his right hand
because of injuries received during X
ray experiments. Despite Injuries and
warnings lie had kept on with Ills
work. He died a martyr to science
A short time earlier Dr. Blinon. dl
rector of the Radiographic Institute ot
Geneva, lost his left band for the MIIIIU
cause, while tils partner. Dr. t-eroyer.
had sacrificed td-o fingers Both arc
going forward with their experiments
I,Ate in January Bir George Turuei
afflicted with leprosy as a result of his
heroic work for the lepers of South Af
rica, announced that be was going
back to devote his life to a battle with
the dread dlsense.
At about tbe same time Dr. Fried
mann laid bis fumotis tuberculosis cure
before the chief of the German public
health departmeut and invited tbe se
ferest tests. This cure has long been
• mystery. Others claimed to have dis
covered the secret, one from a former
employee of Dr. Frledmann, another
from a culture taken from a Fried
maun patient It waa to give tbe pub
lic the real cure that Dr. Frledmann
took this radical step, though to do so
be banded to tbe world the results of
long years of patient research and skill.
It Is thus that men give themselves
for the health of their fellow*.
There Is infinite hope for an age In
which such men thus give life and
limb or the fruits of a life's work for
the good of mankind. There Is no com
plaint, rather a cheerful and matter of
fact surrender of their all that other*
To be worthy to lire In a time that
produces these and countless other
martyrs to science It is necessary tbst
we do something.
. It Is I high standard they set before
■'tis. But surely we are good enough
•ports to accept the challenge.
We, too, will serve mankind, each In
bla own way, In an attempt to play in
the high game of thla second decade of
tbe twentieth century.
We may not be martyrs to science or
martyrs to anything elae, but we, too,
can help on the world's progress.
WBT TIE WORLD CROWS BETTER.
People go up • hill by marching and
Tbe world la constituted of tbe peo
ple who are In it We are among these
people, and the world Is what we col
lectively make It
If the world Is growing better, as
we so ofteu bear. It Is because we are
making It lielter.
Are we Individually doing our part?
('an we eacb of us say, "I left tbe
world a Utile better for tuy being
If not, we aro a hindrance rather
than a help to mankind.
That Is alMiut the worst thing that
can lie said of n man.
It convicts hltn of getting something
Ho receives the advantages of civili
zation. culture, free government, en
lightenment. great Inventions, religion,
art, literature, humane Institutions shd
The only wny he ran make repay
ment for these blessings Is by addlug
something to them.
He cannot pay the paat That Is
gone. Hut lie cnu pay tho future
This Is the course of life.
We repay our parents for tbelr cars
of us by our care of our own children
If we shirk, tve are getting some
thing for uolhlng.
Here la t a story of some people wbo
are doing a v«ty definite eervice to
make Ihe world better:
The Babies' Welfare association of
New York city .recently reported that,
tbe death rate of Infanta onder one
year old had fallen In tbe paat year.
Dnrlng Ihe year 1012 there were
14 WO deaths of auch Infants aa i gainst
15,0.13 the previous year.
Yet the births 111 1012 eaceedeil those
if 1011 by IjOM.
The decrease In Infantile mortality
waa dne to Ihe work of eighty socie
ties bonded together to a comrilon cam
-We may not be able to work in tbe
same way, Imt every one of ua can
work In some way- to make things bet
That Is tbe way to pay oar debt for
tbe blessings we enjoy.
That If the way to bntance tbe ac
count and be square with tbe world.
AS IT WAS IN BABYLON.
The ruins of dynasties past away
la eloquent silence lie.
And the despot's fate is tbe aaaie today
That It was In the days gone by.
Against dl wrong and Injustice done
A rigid amount la set.
For the Ood wbo reigned over Babytoa
la the Ood who Is islgnlng yet
We tblnk of divorce as a modem
-thing, a development of tbe paat fifty
Yet It baa been recently discovered
that during tbe reign of Ilammu-raliL
king of Babylon, about 2280 B. C., di
vorce waa almost aa common as
Babylon tras a great and beautiful
city. perhAp* .the greatest and most
cbanning of wblcb tboee faroff times
It contained culture and learning,
wealth and art.
. Its hanging gardens were famous.
| Its architecture waa lb» wm.w »/
It wui tbe chief sent of afndent civ
It waa religious after a fashion—had
several religions. In foct Ita priest
i hood constituted a powerful hierarchy.
It bad amusements, material pros
perity, wide dominion.
Ita women were l#hntlful. \et their
virtue became a h.vword.
And Bab) ton fell.
Today only a heap of rt'ln* In the
£eaert marks Its site.
Ita name hits liecome a term of re
proach to all nation*.
Much of oi:r Christian Bible Is given
up to denouncing It.
The fill of Its womanhood I* the
chief cbarve agninn it.
We miiMt go back rI.OOO years to this
Babylon to find n parallel for the dl
vorce erll ofolir ila.v - .
Even Ititui" tvns not so bad. although
Rome al/o wan 'ax. and Rome also fell
These arc the facts, pointing like
warning flint*'** out of the age*.
Their ini>i"'l Is so obvious thai It need
not be |s»ln* -tl out.
We may all hr.ve our opinion* about
divorce and kindred things, Wit evci
tbe babel of Opinion grows silent be
fore these awful witnesses froiu the
We cannot argue wllh these gaunt,
Over and over again we have heard
the truth tlmt the temple of civilization
Is reared U|iOn the cornerstone of the
• Babylon's coner*tone crumbled Her
house fall, and great was the fall of It.
The noise thereof still eclioes aloug
i The other day It waa found thai
three-fonrfhs of the homes of Boston's
aristocratic Hack Hay section are child
less. ' '
No; I am not saying that we are go
ing the way Hnbylun went—nothing of
The luw of on use aud effect bas not
Facts are facts, and righteousness Is
The Ood who reigned over Babylon
la the Clod who la reigning yet.
A short time ago ths newspapers re
ported the first mothers' pension 'or
dered In Philadelphia.
This Is u new thing In America, al
though there bas been more or leaa
agitation In Its behalf for tbe paat few
years, and some progress has been
made in Illinois and elsewhere.
Now comes the Welcome news that
mothers' |ien*loii legislation la before
tbe legislatures of many states.
While the idea Is new In thia coun
try, however, It bus Iweu triud with
> great success in Kurope.
A* advocated In the United States
the mothers' iienslon Is *uppo«ed to
, cover only cases of actual neinl-wbere
, the mothnr has been left a widow or
Is In Indigent circumstances for other
, The argument In Its favor la not only
i sentimental, imt economic. It la claim
ed on ei|iert authority that It ia cbenp
, er to give. tl.e mother a certain stated
amount to look after ber little ones
than It would lie to keep tbem In an
Bounds reasonable, doesn't It?
Besides, it Is I letter for tbe children.
' Tbelr mother l'i their natural pro
It kee|is the fnuilly together.
A child needs ii mother's love and
car* as much ii* It needs food, cloth-.
Ing and ahulter.
1 In after years it becomes u belter
man or woiiuiii liecnuse of the memory
of a mother's love.
Bych a recollection Jcnds moral stilt
-1 ure and spiritual background
[ Wbo ever heard of any que shedding
tear* or resolving to reform and luud
' a better life over the memory of an
institution) -—« —— ; .*■'
Only tbe thought of a mother can
work these spell*
We give countless million* to tbe
care of helpless adulta. to tbe insane,
the very poor and the defective.
Yet these have no future. Neither
are ffcey of any lienefit to aoclety.
Why should we not give to tbe care
of tbe children? They ire the citizens
of tbe future.
There exlata a* great sentimental
reason* to cherish them a* to bouse
i the defective adults. In addition there
la tbe powerful economic reason that
every dollar expended for them I* mora
, ttyan repaid In their value to society.
Charity for them is not a gift, bat
The most liaslnemllke way to tn«k*
this investment Is to place It In tbe
, hand* of their mother*. That plan In
jures tbe largest return on tbe money
Eacb of ua can belp In thla wortby
cause by *eclng that tbe legislators of
,' our respective state* exact mother*
If you tblnk well of it why not write
to your state senator and representa
tive to that effect?
The Last Word.
"Charley, dear," *ald young Mr*.
Torklna, "I'm going to be s suffragette
and march in a parade.'
"Too fife, eh!"
"Ye*. I feel It my duty to abow an
active Interest In politics."
"I see. Well, what are yonr view* on
Schedule K of the tariff?"
"That'* not [*»lltlc* That'* tbe al
"Well, bow about direct primaries or
the Initiative and referendum?"
"Oh, I never pretended to know mack
"How about banking and OnanceT'
"Why, they seem all right, don't
"Too see," be shouted triumphantly,
"you don't know a thing about the
■objects that ara being discus**dr
"Weil. Charley, dear, yon mean well,
of course. Bat I must My that It
•eetna very stupid and silly of yoa to
learn all tboee band word* and puzzle
over problems to show your Interest In
politic* when we csn do so simply by
lurching In s parade."-Washington
Ne Danger There.
Tbe following story Is tOld of Robert'
W. Chambers, tbe author. It aasma
that a talkative old bore accoeted blin
In bla dub one day aad filled Cham
ber*' ear with conversation which was'
principally laudatory, but BOM the toss
tlrewme tp jtbf author.
"Do you know. Chamber*,- me old
gentleman Anally wild. "I can't com
prebend how It Is that writing two or
three novel* every year the way you
do, to »ay nothing of QiimemuH abort
stories, you don't write yourself out "
"My dear sir." cam* the limtant re-,
P'y, "T c»«e I" not a bit more worthy
of apprehension on that score thnn
your own Here you've been talking
steadily for over sixty year*, and yon
haven't talked yourself ont yei. have
you?"— New York World
, Got His "HV Back.
Ople Until. novelist, magaclne write'
anil ex-tramp printer, used to peregrl
nate over the south In Ills early days
, and once edited a paper at 1.11110 Itock
One week an ebullition appeared In
Read's hit tie Itock sheet which arous
, ed the Indignation of mi English print
er who worker on the opposition sheet
Next morning the Englishman, coat
leaa and listless, boiling with rage, en
tered Read's sanctum sanctorum and
waving the offensive article In his
band, rend the riot act to Rend, de
mainline a retraction and an apology
Read, grxid untured and amiable, look
ed over the article In iiuextlou. decided
• It was more ludicrous tbnn offensive
and hurst forth loud guffaw.
"You'd lietier think over the matter,'
persuadrd Head "Can't you take a
• "Joke! Joke. Is. ItT" he exploded
» "Well, 'ereafter yon'd 1 letter laliel 'em.'
'"You're Just tielng Initiated Into the
r intricacies of a harmless American
. joke." said Head And then, renchln?
t over Into a nearby case of got
a handful and luissed them to the er
I raged Rriton.
i " "Ere," drawled Read: "I'm returning
• those W you've dropped during thh
gnbfcstl"-*-Uncle Remus' Magazine
Too Warm For
"So you got an accident to report
I have you?" said the head clerk to the
foreman of the t works.
I "Yes. sir." sail) the foreman, and aft
er gnawing nights penholder for s
considerable time he handed the clert
the report. It rend:
Data: Nov it Nature of sodden!: 1»
badly crushed. Itow canned: Accidental
blow from fellow workman's sledsehsm
"Very good." said the clerk. "Bnt
• why have you omitted 'Remarks?*"
"Well, *lr." said the foreman, who
was a very frank man. "seeing as you
1 know wht Hill Is and as you know It
' Is his big toe that was hurt. I—well, I
I didn't like to put 'em down."—Tit Hits
Nor'/i Dakota lioys and girls will
'| have a chance.to taki. part in a new j
kind of contest the present year—that '
" | of pork production. The "better fartn-
I I Ills'' association of the state has of-
I fered twenty prises, ranging from SIOO
1 . down, for the largest production of
' ■ pork from a sow at the loweat food
' i cost per pound of |>ork produced. The
r i sows must be entered In the contest
r prior to farrowing and not later than
March 10. The contest will close In
1 November, and the weight of the llttei
of the sow at the end of the period will
j serve as the bails for the awards.
' * Silage Per Beef Production.
1 For year* silage baa been known'jo
be an economical feed In the produc- j
tion or meat. Not until the past few
year*, however, baa silage fed beef
• bean recognized as superior to tbat pro
duced by methoda of feeding in wblcb ;
■Dag* baa not been employed. In tbe
packing centers of tbia country silage
fed beef now command* a premium.
Thla i* an added argument for tbe *llo.
Tbat little touch of refinement In the
preparation of any food commodity
which make* It (ought by the consumer
la a thing which (be food prodncet
ean well afford to give. It require*
, about so much In cent* to produce a
pound of beef. If In the feeding that
pound can be made Just a little bettei
than the average pound the added val
a* la an added profit which usunllj
coat* little.—Kanaaa Farmer.
lee Water Bad Per Dairy Cows.
Many a bard worked dairy cow will
cblll and ahlver thla winter when sb*
take* a draft of Icy water from the
tank. And at tbe next milking time
■be will atlll be cblily and will give
■en milk than If her Inahles bnd noi
been froxen up. It paya to give tht
flalry cow* water—that Is.
wltb tbe cblll taken off. Winter milk
production la not a natural function ol
tbe cow, but I* strictly an artificial ar
rangement by man. If proflta are ex
tracted tbe cow must lie bumored a Ut
ile. A small tank beater will pay blf
MvUctid* In • dairy herd.
Effect ef Dehorning I Bull.
It la a somewhat detatable questloe
Whether dehorning a bull lnjuree hla
character no tbat It will bare any ef
fect upon bla breeding powers. Some
observers and careful breeders rather
favor tbe opinion tbafdebornlng a boll
takaa away from tilm certain tralla or
at least modlflea them to such an ex
tenttbat bis breeding,power* are more
. er lea* Impaired. Others caonn see
r tbat dehorning baa any Influence upon
tbe breeding powers of a ball. Tbe op
emtio* la In no wise dangerous, espe
i (tally If done after tbe fly sesson -
i AI tue run wit J sargvona ounce is
Philadelphia recently Dr. E. C Boa*
of Zaneavllle told, apropos of operas
lng fanatics, a little story,
r "Two old fellows," be began, "ware
talking at a seaside sanitarian about
, tbelr aliments.
" 'My doctor,' said tbe first, 'wanted
to operate on me, bat tbe consaltlni
1 surgeon vetoed it'
" 'Vetoed It, eh? Why?" said tbe sec
ond s* h* watched a Ashing boat rock
, log on tbe blue wave*.
"'He considered,' waa the answer,
tbat I wasn't wealthy enough to stand
euch a serious and dlScalt operation.'"
; —Philadelphia North American.
Wtisn Socrates was on thf» earth
Men called blm rather wise.
H* talked for' ell tbat h» was worth.
It pays to advertise.
When Csesar went to war be took
Of busy clerks s string
' And wrote hlmeelf up In a book,
t Publicity's tbe thing.
And so ws cannot be quite aura
Amid the bout and bluff
l" That some of tbat old Uterstura
I Waa not Dress sgent stuff
iii itn i inrif .ni
d Madam, Read MdM
Each fame is brimful of ftudiieafc MBH
I tor women. There an mote
the neweat derinia or the
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month* In order to keep
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LIVES OF CHRISTIAN MINISTERS l
This book, entitled as above, 3]
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