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Warning; Unleatf you aee the name "Bayer'* on package or on tablets you are not getting tiie genuine Bayer Aiplria proved safe by millions and prescribed by physicians for 23 years. . Say "Bayer" when you buy Aspirin. Imitations may prove dangerous.—Adv. A garage turned Into a chicken hoaae is Income. A chicken house tnrned Into a garage Is outgo. Hall's Catarrh Medicine St? 0 *"." vfld your >ywtin of CYlfffH of Dctfom csoscd by Catarrh. M ty JW mm 49 jmh f. J. CHENEY ft. CO. Toledo, OUo THREE MEN AND A MAID THE PERFECT KNIGHT MM. Horace Hlgnett, world famous writer on theoaophy. au thor of "The Spreading Light," etc., etc.. arrive# In New York on • lecturing tour. Euatac* her aon. la with her. Wlndlea. ances tral home of the Hlgnetta, la hla, ao her life la largely devoted to keeping him unmarried. Enter her nephew. Sam. aon of Sir Mal laby Marlowe, the eminent Lon don lawyer. It la arranged Sam and Eustace ahall aall to gether on the Atlantic the ne*t day. Enter Bream Mortimer. American, aon of a friend of an ln»uff>rable American named Bennett, who has been peaterlng Mra. Hlgnett to leaae Wlndlea. Bream Inform* her that Wll heimlna Bennett la watting for Euatace at the Little Church Round the Corner. Bream him aelf la In love jwlth Wllhclmlna. Mra. Hlgnett marchea off to Eua tace'a room. The acene ahlfta to the Atlantic at her pier. Sam. heading for the gangplank, meeta a glorloua, red-headed girl, with whom he Inatantly falls In love, though her dog bltea him. Eua tftce appeara. heart-broken. It appeara that hla mother had "pinched hla trouaera" and- de layed the ceremony, whereupon Wllhelmlna had declared the wed ding off. Sam la pustied over board. haa a deaperate atruggle In the water with another awlm mer and rejolna the Atlantic at quarantine. The red-headed girl la Wllhelmlna Bennett—"BUlle." She halla Sam aa a hero and In troduce Bream. Euatace, a poor aallor, keepa to hla berth. He doean't know Blllle la on board. Sam makea warm love. He pro poaea and la accepted. Sam plana to alng In the ahlp'a concert and forcea Euatace to promlae to be hla accompanlat. CHAPTER V—Continued. v "But you're had dinner." "Well, I'll hove another. I feel Just ready for a nice fat pork chop. . . "Stop! Stop!" "A nice far pork chop with potatoes and lota of cabbage," repeated Sam, flrmly. "And 1 shall eat it here pn this very lounge. Now, how do we goj" "You wouldn't do that!" said Eua tnce plteoualy. "I would and will." "But I shouldn't be any good afc the piano. I've forgotten how the thing used to go." "You haven't done anything of the kind. I come In and say, 'Hullo. lOr neat!' and you nay 'Hullo, Frank!' and then you help me tell the story about the .Pullman car. A child could do. your part of It." "lierhaps there is some child on noard . . ." "No I I want you. I shall feel safe with you. We've done II? together be fore." *■ "But honestly, I really donH think. . . . It Isn't as If . . ." Sara rose and extended a finger iO\vnrd the bell. "Stop I 8top" cried Eustace Hlg nett. 'l'll do It!" Sam withdrew his Anger. "Good!" lie said. "We've J»Bt got time for a rehearsal while you're Shess- Ing. 'Hullo, Ernest!' '* "Hullo, Frank," said •Eustace Hlg nett, brokenly, as he searched for his unfamiliar trousers. CHAPTER VI Ships' concerts are given In aid of the seamen's orphans imd widows, and. after one has been present at a few of then!, one seems to feel that any right-thinking orphan or widow would rather Jog along and take a chance of starvation than be the Innocent cause of such things. They open with a long speech from the roaster of cere monies—so long, as a rule, that It Is only the thought of what Is going to happen afterward that enables the au dience to bear It with fortitude. Thts done, the amateur talent Is unleashed, and the grim work begins. It wssjiot till after the all too brief Intermission for rest and recuperation that the newly formed team of Mar lowe and Hlgnett was scheduled to appear. Previous lo this there had been dark deetls dne In the quiet sa loon. The lecturer on deep-sea fish had fulfllled his threat and spoken at great length op a subject which, treat ed by a master of oratory, would have palled on the audience after ten or fifteen minutes; and at the end of fifteen minutes this speaker had only Just got past the haddocks and was feeling Ms, wsy tentatively through the shrimps. "The Ilosary" had been sung and there waa an uneasy doubt as to whether It was not going to be sung again after the Interval —the latest rtfmor being that tbe second of the rival lady singers had proved ada mant to "all appeals and Intended to fight the thing out on the lines she nad originally chosen If they" put her In Irons. A young man rvcltrd "CDDKB Din" and. willfully misinterpreting the grati tude of the audience that It was over for a dealt* for more, had followed It with "Fuxxy-Wuxzy." His sister—theae thins* run In famlllea— had sung "My Little Gray Hotne In the West" —rather somberly, for she had wanted to aing the "Roaary," and. with the Mine ob tuaenesa which characterized her brother, had etnne back and rendered two plantation aonga. The audience waa now examining Ita progroma in tbe Interval of alienee In order to jacertaln the duration of the sentenc* still remtf.nlng uoexphed. It waa shocked to read (tie follow ing : • 7. A Little Imitation —8. Harlow* By P. G. WODEHOUSE All over the saloon you could see fair women and brave men wilting In inelr seats. Imitation. ... 1 The word, as Keats would oave said, was like a knell I Many of these people were old travelers, and their minds went back winclngly, as one recalls forgotten wounds, to occasions when performers at ships' concerts had Imi tated Whole strings of Dickens' char acters or, with the assistance of a few hats-and a little false hair, had en deavored to portray Napoleon, Bis marck, Shakespeare and others of the famous dead. In this printed line on the program there was nothing to In dicate the nature or scope of the imi tation which this S. Marlowe proposed to Indict upon them. They could only sit and wult arid hope that It would be short. There was a sinking of hearts aB Eustace Hignett moved down the room and took his place at the piano. A pianist! This argued more singing. The more pessimistic began to feur that the Imitation was going to be one of those Imitations of well-known opera artistes which, though rare, do occasionally add to the horrors of ships' concerts.. They stared at Hig nett apprehensively. There seemed to them .something ominous In tlie mail's very aspect His face was very pale and set, tjie face of one approaching a task at which his humanity shudders. They could not know that the pallor of Eustace Hignett was due entirely to the slight tremor which, eren on the calmest nights, the engines of an ocean liner produce In the flooring of a dining saloon and to that faint yet well-defined, smell of cooked meats which clings to a room where a great many people have recently been eating a great many meals. A few beads of cold perspiration were clinging to Eus tace Hlgnett's brow. He looked straight before him with unseeing eyes. He was thinking hard of the Sahara. So tense was Eustace's concentra tlon that he did not see BUIle Bennett, seated In the front row. BUIle had watched him enter with a little thrill of embarrassment. She wished that she had been content with one of the seats at the back. But her friend, Jane Hubbard, who accompanied her, had insisted on the front row. In order to avoid recognition for as long as possible, Blllle now put up her fan and turned to Jane. She was surprised to see that her friend was staring eagerly before lier with a fixity almost equal to that of Eustace. "What Is the matter, Jane?" Jane Hubbard was a tall, handsome girl wKh large brown eyes. About her, as Bream Mortimer had said, there was something "dynamic. The daughter of an eminent explorer and big-game hunter, she had frequently accompanied her father on his expe ditions. An outdoors girl. "tflio Is thot man at the piano?" she whispered. "Do you know him?" "As a matter of fact, I do," said filllle. "His name is Hignett. Why?" "I met him on the subway not long ago. I'oor little fellow, how miserable he looks!" , * At this moment their conversation was Interrupted. Eustace Hlgnett, pulling himself together with- a pain ful effort, raised his hands and struck a crashing chord: and, as he did so, there appeared through the door at the far end of the saloon a figure at the sight, of which the entire au dience started convulsively with a feel ing that a worse thing had befallen them than even they had looked for. The figure was richly clad In some scarlet material. Its face waa a grisly black and below the nose appeared what seemed a horrible gash. It ad vanced toward them, smoking a cigar. "Ilullo, Ernest," It said. v Xnd then it seemed to pause expect antly, as though desiring some reply. Dead silence reigned In the saloon. "Hullo, Ernest I" Those nearest the plana—and no body more quickly than Jane Hub-' Than With tbe Cry *f 1 Stricken Ani mal, He Bounded Front His Seat and Fled for tbe Deck. bard—now observed that tbe vhite far* of the man on the stool had grown whiter still. His eyes 1 axed out glasslly from under his dauip brow. He looked like a rain win. ana seeing some ghastly sight The audi- Copyright by George H. Doraa Cot ence sympathized with him. They felt like that, too. In all .human. plans there Is ever Home slight hitch, some little miscal culation which Just makes all the dif ference. A moment's thought should have told Eustace Hignett that a halt smoked cigar was one of the essen tial properties to any Imitation of the eminent Mr. Tlnney: but he bad com pletely overlooked the fact The clga* came as an absolute surprise to him, and it could not have affected him more powerfully If It had been a voice from the tomb. He stared at it pal lidly, like Macbeth at tl*e ghost of Hanquo. It was a strong, lively young cigar, and Its curling smoke played lightly about his nostrils. His Jaw fell. His eyes protruded. He looked for a long moment like one of those deep-sea fishes concerning which the recent lecturer had spoken so search 'ngly. Then with the cry of a stricken animal, he bounded from ills seat and fled for the deck. There was a rustle of millinery at BllHe's side as Jane Hubbard rose and followed him. Jane was" deeply stirred. Even as he sat, looking so pale and piteous, at the piano, her big heart had gone out to him, and now, in bis moment of anguish, he seemed to bring to the surface every thing that was beat and most compas sionate In her nature. Thrusting aside a steward who happened to be Ifetween her and th* door, she raced In pursuit. Sam Marlowe had watched his cousin's dash for the open with a consternation 'so complete that his senses seemed to have left him. A general, deserted by his men on some stricken field, might have felt some thing akin to his emotion. Of ail the learned professions, the Imitation of. Mr. Frank Tlnney is the one which can least easily be carried through single-handed. The man at the piano, the leader of the orchestra, is essen tial. He Is the life-blood of the enter tainment Without him nothing can be done. For an Instant Sara stood there, gaping blankly. Then the open door of the saloon seemed to beckon an Invitation. He made for It, reached It, passed through It. That concluded his efforts In aid of the Seamed's Orphans and Widows. The spell which had lain on the au dience broke. This imitation seemed to tliem to possess In an extraordi nary measure the one quality which renders amateur imitations tolerable, that of brevity. They had seen many amateur .Imitations, but never one as short as this. The saloon echoed with their applause. '' It brought no balm to Samuel Mar lowe. He did not bear it. He had fled for refuge to his stateroom and was'-iying In the lower berth, chewing the pillow, a soul In torment CHAPTER VII There was a tap at the door. Sam sat up dizzily. He had lost all count of time. "Who's thatr* "I have a note for you, sir." It was the level voice of J. B. Midge ley, the steward. Stewards, besides being the clvllest and most obliging -body of men iq the wnrld, all have soft and pleasant voices. A -steward, waking you up at six-thirty, to tell you that your bath la' ready, 'When you wanted to sleep on till twelve, Is the nearest human approach to the night ingale. . . "A what?" "A note, si*." "Sam jumped up and switched on the light. He went to the door and took the note from J. B. Mldgeley, who, his missing accomplished, retired in an orderly manner down the passage. Ram looked at the letter with a thrill. He hod never seen the handwriting be fore, but, with the eye of love, he rec ognized It. It was Jtist the sort of hand he woftld have expected Blllle to write, round arid staooth and flow ing, the writing "dT ft warm-hearted girl. He tore open the envelope. "Please come up to the top'deck. I want to speak to you." Sam could not disguise It from him self that he was a little disappointed. I don't know If you see anything wrong with the letter, but the way Sam looked at It was that, for a first love letter, It might have been longer and perhaps a shade warmer. And, with out running any risk of welter's cramp, she might have signed It. However, these were aaall matters. No doubt she bad been In 4 >nrry and all that sori; of thing. The Important point was that lie was going to see her When a man's afraid, sings the bard, a beautiful maid Is a cheering sight to see; and the same truth holds good . an exhibition of himself st a ship's concert. A wom an's gentle sympathy, that was what Samuel Marlowe wanted more than any thing else at the moment That, he felt, was what the doctor ordered.' He scrubbed the burnt cork off hla face with all possible speed and changed his clothes and made his way to the upptr deck. It waa like BllUe, . he felt, to have chosen this spot for I their meeting. It would be deserted and It was hallowed,for tliem both by sacred 'associations. f She was standing at the rail, look 1 lug oat over tbe water. The moon 1 was quite full. Out on the horison u> p the south Its light shone on tbe sea. s making It look like tbe allver beach r of MUM distant fairy island. Tbe girl \ appeared to be wrapped to thought, and it was not till the sharp crack qt Sam's head against an overlianglng stanchion announced his approach tha' she turned. "Oh, is that youT" "Yes." "You've been a long time." "It wasn't an easy Job," explained Sam, "getting all that burnt cork off. You've no notion bow the stuff sticks. You have to use butter. . . She shuddered. "Don't I" "But I t dld. l You have to with burnt cork." .» ' "Don't tell me these horrible things." Her voice, rose almost hysterically. "I never want to hWar the words burnt cork mentioned again as long as I live." "I feel exactly the same." Sam moved to her side. "Darling," he said in a low voice, "It was like you to ask me to meet you here, j I know what you were thinking. You thought that I should need sympathy. You wanted to pet me, to smooth my wounded feelings, to hold me In your arms, «nd 'tell me that, as we loved each other, what did anything else matter?" "I didn't" "Yon dldn'tr "No, I didn't" "Oh, you didn't I I thought you did 1" He looked at her wistfully. "I thought," he said, "that possibly you might have wished to comfort me. I have been through a great strain. I have had a shock. . . "And what about me?" she demand ed passionately. "Haven't 1 Lad a shock ?" He melted at once. "Have you had a shock, too? Poor little thing! Sit down and tell me aK about it" She looked away from him, her fact working. m "Can't you understand what a shock I have had? I thought you were the perfect knight." . "Yes, Isn't ltT" "Isn't wfjatr "I thought you said It was a perfect night." "1 said I thought you were a per fect knight" "Oh, ah I" A sailor crossed the deck, a dim ftf ure In the shadows, went over to • sort of raised snmmerhouse with a brass thingummy In it, fooled about "And What About M«r She Demand, ed, Passionately. "Haven't I Had • Shock r for a moment, and went away again Sailors earn their money easily. "Yes?" said Sam when he had gona * "I forget what I was saying." • "Something about my being thft per feet knight" "Yes. I thought you were." "That's good." "But you're not I" "Nor "No I" "Oh r J Silence fell. Sam was feeling hurl and bewildered. He could not, under stand her mood. He had come'up et pectin 1 to be soothed and comforted and site was like a petulant Iceberg Cynically, he recalled some lines of po etry which he had had to write out 1 hundred times on one occasion a school as a punishment for having in troduced a white mouse into chapeL "Oh, woman la our hoars of Un-somethlug, something, something plesse. When tlddly-umpty umpty brow, A something, something, something thou!'* • He bad forgotten the exact words but the gist of It had been that woa> an, however she might treat a Ban fc times of prosperity, could be relied ot to rally round and do the right tfciai when he was In trouble. How Uttli the poet had known women. "Why not!" he ssld huffily. She gave a little sob. "I put you on a pedestal and I fin you hare feet of day. ' You bar* blurred the image Which I formed oi you. I can never think of you agali without picturing yon as you stood b that saloon, stammering and heiplea M 8... "Wilholmlna Bsnnstt—a rag and a bvns and a hi*fe «f hair." j» » » (to ss ooxranuM "Miss cAmerica" Declares Tanlac ' Wonderful HealthX/iving 4 \" 'a \ .J. /San two occasions. " —Photo by Atlantic Foto Service. Miss Mary Katherine Campbell, "I have taken TANLAC and Ido twice proclaimed "Miss America," not hesitate to say that'it is a won has taken TANLAC and endorses it derful health-giving: tonic. It has in a statemertt recently given to the brought relief and -good health to women of America. In this state- many WO men, and with good health r? en j w Ml i«, rat" dedaresthat one may have a meagure o£ beauty Good Health is the basis of •« Beau- oyercome shortcomi j* ty, and advises women who would be . , R beautiful to "first find good health." fa^ e _ and «*>"■ Her complete statement as giiAfn _R°sy cheeks, sparkling eyes, a is as follows: "I consider it a great' well-rounded figure, a lovable dis priyilege to be able to tell Ihe thou- nositlon, go hand in hand with good sands of women everywhere what a health. To those searching for beau great tonic TANLAC is. Health is- ty, 1, would say—"First of all, Find the basis of all beauty. Without Good Health.' • The TANLAC treat good health, one is apt to be run- ment has proven itself a boon to down, nervous, underweight, high- womankind, and I recommend it." strung, anemic. 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The Alamance Gleaner (Graham, N.C.)
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Jan. 17, 1924, edition 1
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