North Carolina Newspapers

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muii nil miriaf Arymiiht.
COLUMBIA'S PLAINT.
Our heron if old arc fast foiling away,
With the glory ami honor of patriots trie J ;
And the Brave, who succeed thtm, Lut live for
, . day,
Then die in the bloom of their laurels and pride.
The few of the worthies of Washington's days,
Who remain in the land which their bravery
bleat,
Are indeed but fe w and each morrow convey s
A Statesman or Warrior to glory and rent ?
PRECEPT AND EXAMPLE.
A man ulio saw hit son, quite hamlv,
Toss of a gins of raw French Ilrandy !
9hl, " Neddy, you should not do s,
For hcjoor is your greatest foe."
But we are taught to love our foes,
Quoth Ned : so Father, here it gosi.
DESCRIPTION OF A DANDY,
at k 1.4i)t.
A Bandy's a thing without meaning or worth,
Unlike any creature that moves upon earth (
A Fungus, unknown to philosophy's eye,
It seems t cxiit, but we cannot ti ll uhy.
Of no species a part neither fu.li, fli -ili nor fowl.
And shunn'd by mankind, as the bird Jmn the
owli
A thin?, which of value no mortal can render,
Midc up by a tailor, without any gender,
Of belts and of bandages, buckram and tape,
And in all points, but itnte, like a monkey or ape ;
And yet such poor nothings itli apes to compare,
Is an act of injustice to bruxm, I declare ;
For apes have reflection, and useful the ais,
Dut a Dandy can only reflect in his glim.
Then heed not these Dandies, dear ladies, 1 pray,
For should you approach one, 'twould faint quite
away.
We have heard of a Duck, Macaroni, and Shark ;
But a Dandy, poor thing, was unknow n in the ark,
For Noah had never endeavored to sve
A thirg of no use from the deluge's wave.
Variety's Uie very spire of life,
That gives it all its Hiivnr.
Tan Tat mmui ti.,
Struck with the force of the fdlow injr chapter
on the employment of time, and the imirpen.
denre of happiness on riches, we give it, uncon
nected with the name of the ehgaiit author, that
it may be read without prejudice.
HAPPISESS.
It is vaiu to say that the table of
wealth is more delicate than that of
mediocrity When the labourer is
well fed, he is content. The different
cookery of different people proves that
good cheer is that to which we have
been accustomed.
There are then ten or twelve houri in
the day, in which all men, able to pro
cure the necessaries of life, may be
equally happy. With regard t" the
ten or twelve remaining hours, that is
to say, those that separate! a rising
want from one that is gratified, who
can doubt that men do not then enjoy
the same felicity, if they commonly
make the same use of them, and if all
devote them to labour, that is, in the
acquisition of money sufficient to sup
ply their wants ? Now the postillion
vho ridrs, the carter who drives, and
the clerk who encrossrs, all in their
several ranks, propose the same end
the must, therefore, in this sense, rm
plov their time in the ame manner.
But :t will be said, is it the same
wi'h the opulent idler? His riches
furnish him, without labour, with all
he wants. I allow it. But is he there
fore more happy ? No. Nature does
not multiply in his favour the wants of
hunger, love. Sic- Dut does not the
opulent mar. fill up in a manner more
agreei.hle the interval that separates a
gr tified want from one that is rising ?
1 t'ibt it.
This sarinjr, brings to my mind that of a
French rook. He was in Falkland w here he saw
very thing dressed with butter sauce. What !
ssva hf, in this country here they count si hun
dred ditlcrent relijfioos, have they only one aauce
lor all their meats' France fur mr there we
have only one rel rion, hut in return there it no
Ttiea' that we do not eat w'rth a hundred difler-
ent sorts of sauce.
f Hear Tiethil's sermons, one not trcrs'J in
schools.
Hut sironjr in scn and wine without the ruh s
Go work, hunt, exrrv iv, (he thus beraiO
i urn scorn a iiunieiy uiniirr, u Mm can ;
If their plain brr.td and milk w ill do the feat,
The pleasure lies in von, and not the meat.
Pof ri hututian bf Harare,
i V is. 'n f.irt, on the more or less happy em
plfi mo t of ill, r in, ,ir twihe hours" that
ir II v dept nd the h.i pincsi Cr misery of
h f reaten p:rrt of maiilir.J.
The artisan is doubtless subject to
hbour, and so h the idla opulent to
discontent: and which of these two
evils are the grtatest?
If labour he generally regarded as
an evil, it is because in most govern
hu nts the necessaries of life are not to
be had without excessive labour j from
whence the very idea of labour con
stantly excites vhat of pain.
Labour, however, is not pain in it
self. Habit renders it easy; and when
it is pursued without rtmarkahle fa
tigue, it is in itself an advantage. 1 low
many artisans are there who when rich
still continue their occupations, and i our humble opinion, is contrary to fact,
quit them not without regret, when age . for he who possesses most money at
obliges them to it. There is nothing tends least to admonition,
that habit does not render agreeable. Some of Swift's etymologies were
In the exercise of their employ-j very excellent, as far as the sound could
ments, their professions, their talents, i convey the sense. 4 Bucephalus, says
the magistrate who judges, the smith! he, the hor3e of Alexander, was so
who forges, and the messenger who christened from the number of busy
runs, the poet and musician who com-1 fellows employed about him as grooms.'
pose, all taste nearly the same pleas-! But his derivation of the word Balaam,
ure, and in their several occupations is still better. 'The man whom the
equally find means to avoid that natu- ;
ral evil, discontent. ,
The busy man is the happy man. ;
To prove this, 1 distinguish two sorts
of pleasures. The one are the picas-
ures of the senses. These are found-
ed on corporeal wants, are enjoy ed by '
all conditions of men, and at the time
t enpymrnt all arc equally happy.
Hut those pleasures are of short dura- ,
tton.
The ethers are the pleasures of ex
pectation. Among these I reckon all
the means of pr curing corporal pleas
ures ; these means are by expectation
always converted into real pleasures.
When a joiner takes up his plane, what
docs he experience? All the pleasures
of expectation annexed to the payment
for his work. Now these pleasures
are nut experienced by the 'opulent
man, who finds in his money, without
labour, an exchange fur all the objects
of his desires. He has nothing to do
In procure them, and is so much the
more subject to discontent. lie is
I
therefore always uneasy, always in mo-
tion, continually rolling about in his
carnage, like the squirrel in his cage,
to get rid of his disgust.
To be happy, the idle opulent is
lorced to wait, til. nature excites in
i him some fresh desire. . It is therefore
j the disgust of idleness, that in liim fins
j up the interval between a gratified and
j a rising want. But in the artisan it is
labour, which affording him the means
of providing for his wants and his
amustments, becomes thereby acce-
a lie
The wealthy idler experiences a
thousand instances f discontent, w hile
the labouring man enjoys the continu
al pleasure of frtsh expectations.
Labour, svhen it is moderate, is in
general the most happy method of em
ploying our time, when we have no
want to gratify, ami do not erjoj .irv
of the pleasures of the senses, of all
others doubtless the most poignant,
and least durable.
How many agreeable sensations are
unknown to him whom no want obliges
to think ! Do my immense riches se
cure me sdl the pleasures tlvt the poor
desire, but cannot obtain without much
labour ? I give myself up to indolence.
I wait, as I just now said, with impa
tience, till nature shall awake in me
some new desire ; and while I w ait, am
discontented and unhappy. It is not
so with the man of business. When
the idea of labour, and of the money
with w hich it is requited, arc associa
ted in the memory with the idea of
happiness, the labour itself becomes a
pleasure. Each stroke of the axe
biings to the workman's mind the plea
sure that the mnev he is to receive
for his day's labour will procure him.
In genrral, every useful occupation
fills up. in the most agreeable manner.
the interval that separatts a gratified
from a rising want ; that is, the ten or
twelve hours of the day, when w e most
envv the indclrncc cf the rir.h, and
think thty enjoy superior happiness.
The pleasure with which the carter
puts his team to the cart, and the trades
nun opens his chest, and his journal, is
a proof of this truth.
Employment gives pleasure to eve
ry momcnt,but is unknown to the preat
and idle opulent. 1 he measure f our
wealth, whatever prejudice may think,
is not therefore the measure of our
happiness. Consequently, in every
condition, where, as I have said, a man
can, by moderate labour, provide for
all his wants, is ubove indigence, and
not exposed to the discontent of the
idly rich, he is nearly as happy as he
can be.
Men, therefore, withot t being equal
in riches and power, may be equal in
happiness. W hence cou.es it, then, that
kingdoms are peopled with none but
the unfortunate 1
ETYMOLOGY,
Is a very amusing science. To pur
sue the sound requires no learning, and
there have been so many derivations of
names and things, which have no rela
tion to sense, that any body may become
an etymologist.
Lord Coke says that tntney is de
rived from moneo, (to udmonish) 'be
cause it admonishcth its possessor to
make a cood use of it.'Now this, in
Jews called Balaam was a shepherd,
who by often crying ha to his lambs was
therefore called Balaam?
Every body is acquainted with Ilornc
Tooke's learned etymology of King
Pepin. ITe derives it from the Greek
word 0per ' as thus 4 Osper, Eprr,
Oper, Diaper, Napkin, Nipkin, Pipkin,
Pippni.kng, King repin. I he ri
diculous is here well sustained. Hut
this probably is not as clear to the gen
eral reader as the name of Mr. Fox
beine derived from a rain' dau! As
thus 4 Rainy day, rain a littl-, ram
much, rain hard, reynard, Fox.' These
derivations, it must be confessed, run
along the margin of the torgue per
fectlv smooth and free, and are as trace
able as Isaac, which signifies, he smiled;
but cert tin learned men hav e derived
it from eues-ache, because the Talma
dists report that he had a pain in his
eves
The two following are rather more
abstruse
'Bumper. The origin of the word
bumper is from ait bo'i prre ; lor when
the English were good Catholics, and
notasihev now are, heretics, thev usu
ally drank the Pope's health in ti full
, glass, every day after dinner au ben
pere to our cood father.
I A Horse-laugh. A Aarte-laugh is
J certainly a corruption from a hoarse
j laugh, (perhaps such a oe as that o
Erasmus, at a stupid book, which cur
j ed him of his distemper,) and doubt
J less had its origin from r ne who had
j a very rough voice, or a violent cold.
Still there is not in all casts, anv chance
of coming to a precise decision, be. i for, immediately attended, and on be
cause we have, in the vegetable world, 1 ing informed of the iiotion which had
the icr.vr-chesnut, the horse walnut, seized the hypochondriac, immediat U
and the (3rr-radish. In th- animal rxel imed, 44 C) yes, the gentleman is
world, the i;rj-musrle,i5r.('- mmet, ' certainly dead, and it is more than
(formica leo) A:rsr-crab, ;'nd (with: probable his liver was the death of him.
treat submission) a horse-pulmother,' How ever, to ascertain the fact, I will
signifying a tall, bony, coarse, vulgar
woman, who would rossibly. make
some particular gentlemen as sick as a
horse to lo.k at, although thev never
saw a horse sick nor did we.'
Charleston City (iwette. 1
CORON A VION OATH.
Many of our readers, no doubt,
would be glad to see the form of the
oath that was adi.iinwurcd to the pow
erful George IV. cpon his being crow n
ed Kintr of Great Hritain, (France)
Ireland, Scotlard, defender of tht 'haustr d, he halted, and not f.n ling , he
faith, &c. Sc. EiC. To gratify curios-j doctor at his hct h, snon bicawr com
ity, we have copied it from a late Lon-;p"sed. From that period, this rjen
don paper, and present it as follows -t'eman was never knon to complain
1'et. Republican. if'f liver; nor had he, for mure than
bermon being ended, the king un-
covers his head, and the Archbishop
repairs to his Majesty, and asks him j
' Sir, are you willing to take the oaihj Gencul Cru- t ( .Ui.mu. '.- ."-, 7b"
usually taken by your predecessors :' Whereas there is no expr-s- pr idi
Ami the Kinganswers, 4 I am w illinp.'; mer.t for railinc and v : ;r, it is
Then the Archbishop adir.ini-.ters
these questions ; to which the King,
(having a book in his hand) answered
as followeth :
j!a 'ii. tor, u ill y c ii gr.rii sr; J keep,
and by your oath confirm to the peo
ple of England, the law and customs
to them granted by the Kings of F.rg
lar.d, your lawful nnd religious prede
cessors and namely, the laws, and
customs, and francnises granted to the
clergy by the glorious King, St. F.d
ward, your predecessor, according to
the laws of God, the true profession
of the f iosptl, established in this king
dom, and agreeing to the prerogative
of the Kings thereof, and the ancient
custom of this realm ?
King. I grant and promise to keep
them.
. Archb. Sir, will you keep peace and
godly agreement entirely, according to
vour power, to the holy church, the
clergy and the people ?
A";;,;'. I will keep it.
Archb. Sir, will you to your power,
cause law, justice, and discretion, in
mercy and truth, to be executed in all
your judgments i
King. I will.
Archb. Sir, will you grant to hold
and keep1 the rightful customs which
the commonality of this kingdom have ?
And will you defend and uphold them
to the honor of God, so much as in
yon lieth ?
King. I grant and promise so to do.
Then the petition or request of the
Bitmaps to the King is, by one of that
sacred order, with a clear voice, in the
name of the rest standing by :
41 Our Lord, we beseech you to par
don us, and to irrant and to preserve
unto us, and the churches committed
to our charge, all canonical privileges,
and due law and justice ; and that you
will protect and defend us, as every
good king in his kingdom ought, to be
the protector and defender of the Bish
ops and churches under their govern
ment."
The King answers, 44 With a willing
and devout heart, I promise and gran',
you my pardon ; and that I w ill pre
serve and maintain to you, and the
churches committed to your charge,
all privileges, and due law and justice ;
and that I will be your protector and
defender to my utmost power, by the
assistance of God, as every good king
in his kingdom ought, in right o pro
tect and defend the Bishops and church
es under their government."
Then the King rises Iroin his chair,
and being attended by the Lord Great
Chamberlain, and supported by the
two bishops, and the sword of State
carried behfre him, he goes to the altar,
and laying his hand upon the Kv:m
gflists, takes the oath following : 4 The
things which I have here before prom
ised, I will perform and keep. So
hrlp mc-God, and the cements of this
book,' and then kis'.es the book.
IIVI'OtllO.MmiA.
A gendeman who had fur a long
time fancied himtelf dying of a liver
complaint, Was advised by Dr. Craw
ford of Baltimore, to make an excur
sion into the state of Ohio. Alter
travelling about three months, he re
turned bogie apparently in good health ;
b it upon receiving information of the
death of a twin brother, who had ac
tuallv died of a scinhus liver, he im
mediately staggered, and falling down,
ciied out that he was a dead man ; and
had, as he expected, died of a liver
cjmplaint. Dr. Crawford being sent
hasten ta cut him open before pi.'rc-!
faction takes place." He called for a i
carving knife, and whetting it as ;i
butcher would to open a dead call', he
stepped to him, and began to open his
j waistcoat. The hvpochondriac be
came so horribly frightened, that he
leaped up with the ability of a ral. bit,
and crying out 4 Murder, murder,
murder!" ran off with a speed that
would have defied a score of doctors
to catch him. After running a consid
erable distance until he u as almost ex-
twenty years yltrrwartls, any
tnms of this disease.
sytnj)-
therefore ordered, that all nrrsonsion
victed before any court, or magistrate
who has proper cognizance of th." a-e,
for railing or scolding, shall be R;pt (!,
or ct iii a duckiiig tioc, r.nd dipt un
der head and ears, three times, in some
convenient place of fresh or salt v..ter,
as the court or magistrate lory judge
meet.
An nnccrcmsiiiiH cfl'er. B.trton
Harris, sen. of Hockviile, offers him
self a candidate for the next General
Assembly of Maryland. 44 If you
choose (suvs he) you may vote for me
if vou d' n't, you mav let it alone."
4 aV. B. If Tin elided, Vll send my Acn."
The Debtor. is said that by the laws
of China, no man cn he harrassed, even
for the txes of the F.mperor, from the
time he begins' to till the earth in sprint?
until the end of harvest. An excellent
incentive to industry.
From the American (Del ) W'atchnua,
SI'lT'l'INli.
'This habit is sometimes the result i.
disease, but more frequently the cor
sequence of neglect in early educator
or coarseness ot mind. My lroiu.
George, indulging himself in the fa-,1.
ionable practice of cigar smoking, lt
cran to spit about the house As sue
as my mother observed it, she re marl,
i
ed to him : 44 My dear Ueorge, I liUv
had much experience in the world, m.
I have always perceived ' that tho-.
persons who allowed themselves tog.
into indelicate and dirty practice1!, ,
ry soon fell away from mental puiitj
and it you cannot smoke without spi
ting about the house, I entreat you t
banish the cigar." George felt t!
full force of the rebuke the ci
vanished, and no more filthy spitu
was seen.
Some persons, who think themseh.
gentlemen, need a rebuke more seve:
than George received. I endeavor :
keep my house neat and clean lj
while two of my gentlemen vis'm
continue their bad habits, I shall n
succeed. One of them frequently sp:
on my carpet ; and the other, in le
than an hour, will make a shop floor
disgusting scene. a iemai.i:,
NEW-YOKK.
From the Charleston Mercury.
A season of calamity and alarm is o
that is very propitious to schemers of a
sorts and quacks of every kind. lrc',;v
mid preventive pcscriplioiis for yrl'c
fever are now olleieil in abundance to t
people of New-York, all of an infjllk
efiic-cy ; hut the following notice outdt
all others in its swerpinjj good adure a:
promised bem-fils. Jons F.dvvaiius.
seems, is of the Society of Friends, a
oi.e. may suspect him or some of his :
tinia'.r s of being the ow ners of land o
of town, whither he advises the people
sjiicnd themselves-
a
" Divine l iovulence lias wisely forr
Yolk Gl. tid a suitable harbor lor sh ; ,
having .i;(Ticient depth of water on e. !
side of it for the reception of ships of J
bi,i s that may he wanted for any m
( mile business ; but it is much to be !,
ineined liiut a covetous disposition in :
people, and a want of faith in (iol, h
caused them to huddle themselves .
heaps on one end of the Island, whe
they are continually robbing the sea of ,
bounds, and act as if there was no u.
land in America, for they are cominu..
Ltiildiiii; their houses in the water in-v
of spn adinj; themselves on the Id.ind
din hold to say there arc people rnoiu h
New-York to settle the Island up io II if
lem, which is 7 miles. The doctors rn,
ay what they please, but I am cor. fiih
in my own mind the fever is bre
among us owini; to the thick scttlrnu
of the rilv'. Such people live out of !
oi tier of God, for God never intended v
should Ik; so crowded, but has made s
fitie nt loom for us all, if w e choose to .
cept it. Then I say, let all wic rv w
prcad themselves on the Inland ; 1' o ft If
fjiiarc is quitr little enough for any f.r
tiv to live? upon, and all merchants s
some mtrhanics ought to have more,
am a native cf '.Vale. nd have
more than 21 years on New-York Ida",
and I think there is not a more hel
place in all the world ; but the sins of f
people ik one great cause of the pre
distress.
john rmvAun
Scale hesm miter, N. Y. o'.h B'h mo. 15..
Ars-.'y Ir.wttd Reeling Cradle.
A Mr. Simmons, of Haltimore. 1
lately invented a Cradle, which is hi;'
extolled in ,tbe p .pers of thattiiy. X
S. has presented one of his rockinp w
chines to ear h cf the editors and pu':
cis; nd Mr. Sclwcffer, of the Fede
Ilcpublican, on the receipt of his rrer
snvs "There are five d-ulv papers
Baltimore, and the number of propi ice
nd editors amoun' to eiht of tlu.
thtcc only are married ; two of these r
bt-injj blessed with children, vr aie '
only one who lias orrasirdi for a cradle -Wc
wish our married fellow editors
tcr success but what in the world
the five remaining baehrhn do with ti f
rruJ!,i?"
m:n the NVw-Ym k American.
' I he Governor of New Jersey '
ei lifted as true a list of fijA.-u-fur ;
sons, nominated as candidates lor rr;1
srntatives from New Jerscv, in the tic'
tctnth Congress of the United States."
This result has probably arisen rat
from the peculiar mode of nomination i
New Jersey, than from any great diver
ty of sentiment. We understand that c
a specified day, nominations ure made '
the clerks of the respective counties. I tj
any and by all persons entitled to vote fl
those they nominate. No person who
not thus nominated can be legally vott
for j and as the election is by general tic!
et. it niiRht rather excite surprise that
candidates are so few than so many -
I his method, although peculiar, is r
perhaps inequitable or dangerous to th
public tranquility,
    

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