Newspapers / Carolina Watchman (Salisbury, N.C.) / Oct. 31, 1906, edition 1 / Page 3
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FOREJGN HUMOR. Wit of the World From England, Italy and Austria., In an Australian crowd on some pa triotic occasion the name of England .was loudly cheered by a dark visaged person, and an English visitor next to him said in surprise, "Surely you've no English blood in jrour veins 7' "No English blood in my veins!" shouted the other. "Why, my great-greatgrandfather helped to eat Captain Cook!" Morning Post Languid; Luke There's one thing about a clay pipe wot makes it better than a cigar. Agile Algernon What's that? Languid Luke Why, when yer drops It on the I pavement yer don't 'ave to trouble toi stoop and pick it up. Ally Sloper. I "You told us, boy," the tourist said to the urchin who was fishing in, the lake, "that the boat always left here at 4, and we have waited now till past 5." "Oh,'? said the boy, "it doesn't begin to run till next month V Pearson's Weekly, j Servant Maid The slgnora will be Borryt She has gone out for the whole day, but she left a message for you. Visitor Really? What was it? Maid I am so sorry I have forgot ten. I will go up and ask here. La Caricaturista. A celebrated actress, fresh and youthful looking, was in the habit of Invariably' taking eighteen years from her age. She was called once in a law case and gave the usual response. i Her son was called immediately after, and, on being asked his age, be replied promptly, i "Six months older than my mother." II Riso. ifress, Friend Do you know that the gro cery man opposite uses your poems as wrapping paper? Poet Yes, but under our arrange ment he -'only puts up his very best groceries in them. Floh. Max (who is talking over the tele phone with a man who stutters) Papa, come here. There must be a knot" in the telephone wire. Bombe. " Hunting; Trophies. The old farmer led the city boarder ap the rickety stairs. "Come this way, neighbor," he drawled. "I want to show you the horns of all the game I bagged during the past season." Visions of moose and elk antlers flit ted through the mind of the city board er. When he reached the attic he was startled. - 1 T "Why, man," he ejaculated, "the only kind of horns I see up here are automobile horns!" "And automobiles happened to be the game I bagged,' chuckled the old man. "Every .time bne of them ran over "a chicken or a pig I ran out and held them! up by shooting the tires. Then I stripped the iom off as a tro phy." Chicago News. .There Novr. . Miss Speltz I heard you compli menting her upon her girlish appear ance. What did she say? fe Mr. Jollyer She said, "Ah, but I'm sure I'll look very much older when I'm forty!" Miss Speltz Huh! She means she'll look very much older when she admits she's forty. Cathpllc Standard and Times. Should Be . Trustworthy. Miss Bright He said I was the pret tiest girl he had met for some time, and but you were there and heard him say It, I believe. . Miss Chellus Yes; and er really, 1 could scarcely trust my ears Miss Bright (sharply) Why not? Your ears are certainly big enough and old enough. Philadelphia Press. And He Was dolus to Ask For Work. "William Weary (who was about to enter the yard and ask for work when he read the "hands" notice again and stopped in time) Great jimminy! I thought it said, "No hands wanted I" Tatler. Not Complaining?. . "Why," asked the agitator, "should the wage earner be at the beck and call of his employer?" "I'm not," said the auditor, who was yawning. "I've got my employer- so that he minds every word I say and asks no questions. I'm a chaufitoufc"1 jyashlngton Star, 1 ITTp15!!: THE ANNUAL ROMANCE. They met beside the tossing1 waves, This summer lad and; miss, The first evo "neath the glistening moon vj sat somewhat like J The second evening Cupid came. And life was filled with bliss. Fair Luna smiled as she looked down a a 4 5 E ? to of?: F October came around, arid so This summer lad and miss Broke all the tender' vows they made. c And 3 this. -Perrine Lambert. Her Advantage. "A man's vocabulary is always larger than a woman's." "Yes, but a woman's Is more persist ent." Philadelphia Press. Arithmetical History. Mrs. Russell Sage often speaks of the days before her marriage, when she taught school. In &n address that she made last winter before a charitable society Mrs. Sage said: - "That method of giving was not sat isfactory, was it? So vague and un certain were its results indeed that I was reminded of the answer that a pupil of-mine once made in a history lesson. "'How many wars,' I asked this pu pil, 'did England fight with Spain?' " 'Six,' she answered. " 'Six?' said I. 'Enumerate them, please.' " 'One, two, three, four, five, six,' said the little girl." Philadelphia Bul letin. Very Little to Say. "Yes," said Bragg, "I've decided to have a long talk with the boss ajid tell him just what I think." . "Is it possible?" replied Knox. "Why, do t you believe I've got the nerve to tell him what I think?" "Oh, yes! But if you tell him Just what you think how are you ' going to have a long talk?" Catholic Standard and Times. A Counter Irritant. "Have you made arrangements to prevent fraud In the election?" "No," answered Senator Sorghum. "I couldn't quite manage that, but I've done the next best thing to defeat the opposition's . inquiry. I've made ar rangements that'll make their fraud so insignificant by comparison that it won't be noticed." Washington Star. Friends No More. "Do you believe that disease germs are transmitted by kisses?" "I don't think they are." . "That young man who came to see me last night has a theory that, they are." "Don't you believe it.- He was just lying to you to keep you from kissing him good night." Houston Post. Taking In the Coin. "Talklngabout inventions," said the business man, "I have a little machine in my place that would make me a mil lionaire if I could only keep It going all the time." "What Is it?" "A cash register." Philadelphia Ledger. Haw, Haw! Larry 'Twas th' funniest Joke 01 iver hux-rud in all me ' born days! Faith, Oi laughed all day long. Denny Yez did? Larry Yis. Ivery bone In me body filt loike a funny bone. Chicago News. A Way to Raise Money. Physician's Wife I need a new even ing dress. Physician All right, my dear. I'll look over my list and find some fellow who can afford an operation for ap pendicitis. Boston Transcript. More Essential. De Style At last we are in our own little home. I suppose the first thing I must get you is a good cookbook. Mrs. De Style (wife of a week) No er you'd better get me a strong can opener. New York Press. Usual Thing-. "What is it a sign of," asked the in nocent maid'when a young man be gins to tell a girl his troubles?" "It's a sign that he will soon ask her to share them," answered the pretty widow. Judge. ' A Prospective Snub. Edith You would hardly know Bob bie since he got back from Europe. He lost ;ill his money there, and - Ethel Hardly know him! Why, 1 shan't know him at all I Detroit Free Press. " " " FALL GARDENING Bow to Prune Shruhs and Care For JF,loweriuK Plants. ' In the fall gather .up and remove all the debris which has collected in, the flower beds. Cut down the dead stalk, of the perennials and pull up what ffe left of the annuals and burn all refuse of this kind or bury it where It will lej2ay and help to fertilize the soil of. the garden, says the New, York Trib one. , .: There may be no flowers in the win Ser, but neatness should prevail where they have been. Store" away flower Itakes and trellises and give to all plants needed protection, Now is a jgood -time Jto prune any shrubs which were neglected during the summer when they were making growth. If too thick, thin them out, io that the branches you leave .may have room for healthy development. Remove all weak and injured wood. If the plant be awkward in shape, trim it to symmetrical form, but be gure of the character of your plant. Prune no shrub in the fall which blooms in spring from buds formed this season. Only plants which pro duce flowers on a growth of branches made next spring should be pruned now. Cut the clematis to within . two or three feet of the ground, lay on the ground what you leave and cover it well. Put manure about all herbaceous plants. It not only furnishes a sort of protection, but its fertilizing prop erties are set free by fall rains and are absorbed by the soil, to the ben efit of the. plant. In spring what is left can be dug into the soil. Plants in the window garden find this a critical season. Aim to keep the temperature of the room low and to give them all possible fresh air. Be careful about overwatering and use no fertilizer. Fuchsias will have completed their work for the season and should be dried off gradually to get them ready for the cellar, whither they should be taken by the 1st of December, to re main until the 1st of March. Give less and less water while they remain up stairs. If the foliage drops, the plants will not suffer. Plants out of doors drop their leaves in the autumn, so you are trying to treat them as najture treats them. Chrysanthemums should be treated likewise. All cracks and crevices must be closed at the windows where plants are to be kept as a wise ounce of prevention against the entrance of frost. How to Sweep the Nursery. Never sweep the nursery with an or dinary t5room, as it raises too much dust. A soft hair broom should be used or else a flannel bag put over the regular broom, says the Boston Herald. At least every other day the rugs should be taken up and shaken out doors and the floor wiped up with a damp cloth, adding a few drops of carbolic acid or some other mild dis infectant to the water in which, tha cloth is dampened. Never under any circumstances use a feather duster in the nursery. All the furniture, wood work and pictures should be dusted every day with a damp cloth, being careful to dust behind the pictures as well as the other parts. Every week or two dust down the walls with a damp cloth tied on to a broom. Cover the crib and bed with a large sheet when the room is swept and remove all the lighter pieces of furniture after they have been wiped off while the room is being cleaned. At least twice a day the nursery windows should be opened, both top and bottom, for fully half an hour and the room fairly flood-, ed with fresh air and sunshine. How to Clean Cut Glass. From the Berkshire hills comes the sand suitable for cut glass. Fine glass needs constant care, says the Ladies,' ; World. A small quantity of muriatic add may be poured Into, glasses that have become discolored. After allow- ing the acid to remain a short time fill tip the glasses, with water. They will soon become Bright and clear. Potato parings may be utilized for cleaning glass to great advantage. Place the parings in a dish and allow them to remain four or five hours, then wash the dish with w,arm soapsuds. Wipe the dish dry as soon as washed. A stiff brush may be used if dust has collected in the cut glass. How to Make Best Fountain Pen Ink. Do -not use ordinary - writing Ink In your fountain pen, as it will corrode and render your pen useless unless cleaned very often. Take an old type writer ribbon, turn over it a pint of hot water and let it stand a day jpr so, stir ring frequently. Turn the Ink thus made into a bottle, cork securely, and you have an ink which will flow freely and not corrode your pen. If the type writer ribbon had considerable Ink on it you can thin your Ink by adding more water after the first pint Is made. How to Save Your Piano. There is no piece of furniture In the house that gives the lady of the house more anxiety than the piano, as it must not only be saved from scratches at the hands of careless servants, but it must also be kept from damp. It should be opened a little while each day to pre vent the keys from being discolored. A piano tuner says that a growing plant in the room will prevent damp ness. Do not polish with a cloth, but use the coach brush. - How to Make Cranberry Sauce. Put one quart of cranberries into a saucepan and cover with water. Cools until every berry Is burst open, stir ring occasionally. Press through a strainer, and to every cup of the liquid add three-quarters of a cup of sugar. Cook until it will Jelly, which will b In about fifteen minutes. Mold la The Man From Wiltasbtiro. Postmaster J. Ruff Henderson, ot Wilkesboro, spoke to a small audience at the court house 1 st Friday night. The remark of Mr. Henderson, along cor in ,lmes, at leaat, are said t have been, what the late Bill Nye would have termed exceedingly "outre and maudamus.' The Watchman is informed by those who b ; i rd M r. Henderson 'e effort, that ch e audience was not favorably im pressed1 with either Mr. Hender son or his remarks. The Strike Situation. There are so many conflicting rumors regardiug the situation at Spencer that it is difficult to learn just how matters stand. It is rumored that a number; of the men brought here by the rail- ; road to take the places of those who left the shop, have quit work, and that others are preparing to do so. There are alBO rumors of a sympathetic strike at the shops, but those interested are reticent about the matter, and nothing definite can be stated on this point. Of course you're not, n less you ha vo put in years of study. That'-what we have done. That's why we'ean to day positively guarantee the quality of the goods we sell, If you are not drug wise you'll have to depend upi n a druggist's word for the qual ity of your drug purchases. You can depend upon us every time for quality, puri ty, accuracy and perfect serf vice. May we be your drug gist? SALISBURY DRUG CO., 115 N. Main St. COMMISSIONER'S SALE OF A VALUABLE FARM. By virtue of a decree of the Super ior Court of Kowan County in the spe cial proceeding entitled John J. Stew art vs Walter C Mahaley, Thomas Fraley, Jennie V. ; Fraley and others, wherein the undersigned were appoint ed commissioners and directed to sell the real estate described in the petition for partition, we will sell at public auction to the highest bidder for cash at the court house door in Salisbury, N. C, on Monday, November 26th, 1906, at 12 m., the following tract of land: In Providence township about 5 miles East from Salisbury, beginning at a stone in C. Kesler's line Geo. Barringer's corner, and running N. 30 E. 52 chs. to a stone corner to Jos. Mahaley's lot, thence east 34.15 chs. to a stone on South Fork branch thence with the branch to a stake Blackwell's and Sandy Wise's corner, thence S. iyi W. 12,50 chs to a stake Sandy Wise's corner, S. 88 W.. 16.50 chs. to a red oak, thence S. 28 W. 33.13 chs. to a fallen post oak, Geo. Barringer's corner, thence west 12.50 chs. to the beginning, containing- 150 acres more or less, and known as the Julius A. Mahaley farm, the above de scribed land is well timbered with forest pine and oak, also old field pine, and is considered a valuable farm. There are buildings on the place. Terms of sale one-half cash balance in three months. This Oct. 24th, 1906. JOHN. J. STEWART, HAYDEN CLEMENT, Commissioners. Jno. L, Rendleman, L,. H. Clement, Walter H. Woodson, attorneys. t '. Sale of Valuable Farming Lands. Pursuant to a decree of the Superior Court of Rowan County made in the Special Proceeding entitled J. L. Flem ing, admr. of 0. C. Bost, against Elliott Bost and others, I will offer at public, sale, for cash at the Court House door in Salisbury on MONDAY, NOVEMBER 19th. 1906, (subject to the dower right of Rosa J. Bost widow of said C. C. Bost), the fol lowing described lands, situated in At well Townshio,near Concordia Church, being the home place of the late C. C. Bost, containing about 56 3-8 aerns, ad joining the lands of Jacob Bost and others, fully described in the following deeds : L. L. Fesperman and others to C. C. Bost. 30 acres,, registered in Book 64, page 316 : Julius A. Karriker and wife to C. C. Bost 2 1-4 acres, register ed in Book 96 page 372 ; and dee$. from Alexander Best and othere to C Bost 24 1-8 acrsLS, registered in Bo k 96, page 374, Register's office of Rowan County. This Oct. 16th 1906. N J. L. Fleming, Admr. and Com" r". Theo. F, Kluttz, 10-24 4t, Attorney. Hi Am You lug ' WtaT V m Ds Sosefi (Sail Fob I .'-1. REYNOLDS' SUN CURED TOBACCO . CONTAINS LESS SWEETENING THAN ANY OTHER, BECAUSE THE QUALITY OF THE SUN CURED LEAF USED IN ITS MANUFACTURE NEEDS LESS. REYNOLDS' SUN CURED IS THE HIGH-CLASS CHEW THAT YOU FOR MERLY GOT, COSTING FROM 60c. TO $1.00 PER POUND. SOLD AT 50c. PER POUND IN 5c. CUTS; STRICTLY 10c. AND 15c. PLUGS, AND IS THE BEST VALUE IN SUN CURED TO BACCO THAT CAN BE PRODUCED FOR CHEWERS. R. JL REYNOLDS TOBACCO CO., Winston-Salem, N. C. L HOUSEHOLD oooooooooooooooooooooooocoo We carry a full and complete line of Household and Kitchen Furnishings, plain, substantial and ornamental, things that are necessities in every home. We invite you to call, We will take pleasure in showing von whatwolmse. PI! "in "1 - 1 onouia you wisn to buy patronage. Our prices are as low as is. consistent with the quality and finish of the goods offered. Cordially yours, Wm Em WAM - 500 Bushels Clay and White Peas. 100 Turkeys. Mil .M0M9 For Groceries. 0 0 0 NEW DENTAL OFFICE 8 0 8 o MODERN THE PHILADELPHIA DENTAL ASSOCIATION has opened an office in Salisbury and have comb to stay. We do modern up-to-date dentistry at reasonable prices. Our motto is: "Live and let Live." ALL WORK GUARANTEED. Try our method of painless extraction, which is as near painless as practicable. A FEW OF OUR PRICES: Gold fillings, . . . . $1.50 up. Crown, porcelain, ... $'4,00 AmaJgum fillings, ... 75c up. . " gold, .. $6 to $8 00 , Plates, . . . : . . $8.00 to $10.00 Office in Overman Building, up stairs: 122 N. Main St. . See sign, DR. FOX, Mgr. Always Remember the Full Name Laxative Cures a Cold In One Day, Grip in Two. o 0 o 0 o 0 o FimrJBSHinK&S. whethermtish to buy' or not. C7 " - " mm m - ' we will be pleased to have your - f 108 West Innes Street, -V SALISBURY, N. C. TT H 0 0 8 0 0 0 DENTISTRY romo mnan mx
Carolina Watchman (Salisbury, N.C.)
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Oct. 31, 1906, edition 1
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