, YiTf,
ill Ohalham Record.
H. A. LONDON, Jr .
rnrroR and rnoritirroR.
BATEQ
or
ADVERTISING.
n.
TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION:
0OPl ,,' III'Mll'K ....
mow , Uiro moiitli -
Onewiuaro, tw ti.srtt"iis- .
Ouaaqauv."iniiiiniii,
I? IYI -
- VOL. IV.
PITTRROHCV, CHATHAM CO., N. C, APRIL 27, 1882.
NO. 3.5.
Fnr largi" ulTirrtMomiU UWal ..-nutrac'. wU
farm
o
No II imp Tor Hilling.
IlrniH- illi f Avtnv itli Hliii
('in Im man heart" ni.iimtinii ;
I.' I II H III' fin n ix nain ' "linn lib'
Ih till ton nlinrl fur Im'ini; !
So dull the ilny, mi iliin Hit- way.
Sn nniiiil lln' mail 'n- l.iinn;
l'nr belter weal with faithful fri- n-1.
Tbau stall, iiliinr nil. .11 n;;.
Tim barren I'ik, tlic nitln ri 'l tile .
Art ivpca of i Hisb living :
Hill ".nils thai Kiw, like llnii' .m l im
linii iv their 1 1 1 l.y Kiviii.
While c pres im k "'rr cm U (-i.i .
(Ml nil lln w;i h i. 'IIil-,
I r lietti r plant nlnr I ii Hi'.
'I'll :i tl In H'l nil liilll tll.H'K ,:i"ltl,.'
Awnv Willi worn I Min ilir ! mint
Aii'l n -t "ii l ln l" 'ill" ;
I In li' mo mi main in tin- il'i"t
Nil fill H I I II' .llll 111' Hill""
Sn iliy lln Iiiiw M. -'i I' tli" l' "Hi I
I inr i ii till) way ili-i I ,
Varhitlti Hti'i'i'. win i. 'Iiii s 'Ii'" ',
TIkmi tramp on I I I,' n I-"-" - '
l 'I what an- all tin j"ys we li.ld,
Compare,! to i"ii .ill im n
Aid what aiv I.U.I., .iml "' i. 'ti I
('"iiipari 'l l.i In ai i- I" I im- i"
K.i fleet our y .n, toll "t I (t
S i i'I.'K.' ill nth i auinlini;
l.i'l k'HI' II" n.. . I'T loMlln h'l'l' ''
lint 1. :ivi"4 mi inn fur halm.
HONORAS DECISION.
It wut n relly und pieluren'io n'ght
that met Helton lUackV gn. n In
jiauHed auioiig tho cliis'eting hirchea of
wood. Noru Leigh wuk heated on the
grata, with ono iohv child on her lap,
two or throo others Ncattorcd Aronud,
her fuir checks criniKonrd, and tho
braids of bronzo hrown huir hhiuing ln
neat h the oottugo lionuot that hIio wore.
Hho look?d up radiantly us hi r lover's
ithadow fell across tho unglod foms of
tho woodland glade.
"IJcltou, i it yon ?'' hho cried.
"Send tho children nway, Haid he,
impatiently; "I want to talk to you."
"They will not dinturl) tin."
"They will dinturb mo,
A look of puincamo over Ilonoru's
sweet, submissive face.
.1... i.. it. ..l.1..ut
"" -
, . , '
bornci. grow. , .hnt.y can cutty tl.o,
basketH, and see Low many hemes yon I
cun pick lie ore I come.
.1. ....... I ix.rl.Mit n TTA if l.llt i
l","",'u'" ... 7 . :
tho defiant glunco which ho bent on
Mr. Black from beneath his knitted I
brows showed that ho fully compro-
hen. led tho situation of things.
"I hate that man I" ho said to Katie. :
"Oh, Charley !" cried out the innocent ;
child"that is vorv wickod."
"I can't, help it," replied Charlie.
"He's cross, and he pcolds Nora; and I
hate him lM i
la the meantime Bolton Black bad
seated himself on the grass beside ;
Honora Leigh, and tnrown ono arm j
carelessly around her waist. ,
"Nora," said ho. "I've mado up my
miuJ'" ,., '
'Astowhut?
She looked up fondly into h.s dark, '
handsomo ( ast.ltan face.
"As to the propriety of our being
murri. .1 n. xt month. Jennings says 1 !
am to have a purtncrHhii), aud I soo my
way dear at onco. I've spokeii to the
agent about tho Utile hom o in C 1
street, and
'h, Bolton, do you think thut the
honsc will be Im ,'e i innigh '!" inter
rupted llonorn, tinh u li'oub'ed l.i.'e.
"Large etioit.h l.o hut ''
"For the children. There are lour of
them, you know, and "
"No" sai l Mr Black, abruptly. "I
don't tLiuk that it will ! largo ctjough
1 didn't mean that it sliouid. You
surely cannot intend to burden our
household with your aunt's four chil
dren? They are nothing to me, and
they should bo nothing to you. I daro
say I can liud some excellent institution
where"
"I promised my uuut, on her dying
bed, that the children should never lack
a mother's cure," said Ilonoru, who had
grown very pale.
"And you have kept your word,"
broke in Black, impatiently. "For two
yearn yon havo fed, clothed and sop-
ported them out cf your slender earn-
lng.. I is all nonsense to keep up this
sort of thing any longer. I he boys are
lug enongh to work; the girls can easily
be provided for in an orphan asylum.
'Oh, Belton-nerer !
Jnst as you ph ae," said Mr. Black,
Ins face' growing as hard as adamant.
"Bnt remember one thing, Nora- yon
roost choose
lover I"
etween them and
yur
Honors uttered a sobbing cry.
"Bolton, Belton I" wailed the, "how
can yon be to hard ?"
''I am only sensible and practical."
"They are so little, so helpless. Ob,
I cannot tnrn them over to the crael
mercies of the world," pleaded Honora.
"That must be for von to decide."
She sat for a minnte locking at the I
tiny child-flgnres that flitted about on
the edffe of the wood, listening to their i
innocent laughter; then she looked up
into his face.
"I have decided," said she. "loan
not leave the children."
Belton Black's brow grew dark as
Bight.
; "Very well," said he, rising to Ihh
' feet; "you nro nwutc what that implies'.'"
I "Yon." in 11 low, tremulous voice.
I "Ami von uro willing in nli li by ii!
Yes."
, "Good by, tlicii," extending a cold
Intnl.
"(1. (id I iy, Belton."
Ami her eyes followed Liui with n
vugue, fascinated gn.- ns ho strode out
of tlin groi n gludo and wan lost to vi(tw.
"fluve 1 dono right V" she asked hor
nolf, with n sharp pain at In r heart, and
tlii'ii, as little Ncllio ciime up, crying
out, "Nora, Norn, iu got u forn in my
i linnor '." und holding tip tho tiny digit,
with tour Mnincd fhookw, hIio caught
tho child in her iirtns and Noldu'd out,
"(iod holi mo ! i'cH, I huvo doni)
tiht, for thi'ho liltlt) ciich huvo tin one
lint mo."
K . ll'inoru Ijoigh went duck to her
life of Mitient drudgery und ccuhoIosm
toil once more. And tho rich gentle
uitiu on thu first floor, who taw her g
1 in and out with her little lutibic-roll.
j uked the landlady who nIio wuh.
"It's Mi: Ij"igh, hit, ' Mlid tho WO
man ; " daily govorne:.H, und ono if
thu MWi'otost, uio-t (elf-donying young
ludieH, in ever gave up her lif-i for tho
I boiietit of othorH."
"IIiiiiid1i !" Huid tho rich gentleman
"Them arc nut luanv Midi in th
world."
"No, itir ; iml 'ttd thcrc'ri not !'' Huid
Mth. filoore
How tho rich gentleman tn tho lirat
n()1)r becumo uciuuii.t. d with tho daily
governcsH how tho children begun to
rnn in and out of 1: in room, and unk
him io tell them luirvelous utorioH of
Amotion, from whence ho cuino and
how ut lust pretty Nora went luok to
Vuicricit with him us his wife, would
make too long a recital in detail, iiuflico
it to Kuy l hat micli was tho fact.
"Ood LleBs tho iilllo ones !" Mr,
liontlcl'l Haid ; "thoro'n room and to
pare for them in my homo. And, to
lny think Ilgi there's no uwccler sound
)0ut thp hollHO tblin t.iUren',, voices. "
And if nnytbin,r oonld have made
Nora lovo her huhbnnd mot e dourly than
h,( ,l:ul i1omh M woulll ,lllvo
tleso wor(,fl of hjH
Aul ho
children grew ni iuto health and
beauty, und Norn, in her satins, hud
almost forgotten the sore strnits of her
early girlhood, when ono day tho past
was recalled to her by a most unex
pected accident.
"If you please, Mrs. Uoulicld," said
tho cook, ono day, "Tim suys there's a
poor family sotthu' down in tho old
oottugo by tho gate, as is almost
starvin'. 'Sure,' says I to Tim, 'why
don't yon tell tho missus ?' Hiys he,
What for would I le botherin' her,
HU(1 tb(iy notyn. io Ler?. Hiy8 j
hmA of hpt novof c,ohcJ agiu the
ick M), ,h(. ooriHnil l(, LWiTim
if you don't.'"
,.yol uro right M ,. Hui(l MrH
,.,,,. .,, will g() tLi , pvt.ninR Hm1
jiuire iulo lhe t.ttH0..
An,, wjth cllljrl(v t.lirrvinj, l)llHkut
itl wlllVh Wh )iI()1 B R()()llIy hpi,lv ((f
j(,lh. wiui i11)tll.mudo broad and hot -
gllJ Nonl W(lkl,a t() 10 ruiulil
,..,11..,,., ,.t ,illMi.
Al.is for tho squalor and poverty of
tho wretched place I A candle burning
on the hearth, u gaunt form outstretched
on heap of straw, with fever-glowing
cheek utid eyes rolliug restlessly in their
sunken sockets, while by the door sat
a faded woman, rocking u child to und
fio in her lap.
"I hope wu'ro not intruding, ma'am,"
said she, with something of a lady's
courtesy and accent ; but my husband
could go no further. We are on our
way to Omaha, where he thought he
could got employment,"
"Yon are quite welcome to stay hero,"
said Mrs. Bon field, gently j "and I will
r.vii.l you noine things from the house
to make you more comfortable. Yo ir
husband's name is "
"Black, ma'am Bolton Black. We've
had bad lnok, and we thought perhaps
wo mighf do better here," sighed the
woman. "But 1 heartily wish we had
tuvftil in T'tnirltind.'
Vm BonUolJ.8 beftrl beat ,io)eut,
HjVBncod a pMe or two towartl
tLo wrctohod Ueap of traw where tbo
yB,low flickerof tba C14ujll, fuillllv iIltl.
! minato(l ft face wbicU sbo wou,(,
jhaye rocognjzcdtUo fft00 f I5olton
: gliek
t ',. . . , , , ,,. n
that tho eyes of his old sweetheart had
rested pityingly upon him in his last
honr. And the simple headstone that
was reared over his remains in tho ceme
tery was placed there through Honora
Bonfield's charity.
I '.very hnman being has a work to
carry on within, duties to porform
abroad, influences to exert, which are
peculiarly his and which no conscience
bnt his own can teach,
Orange treea are cultivated from the
aeed. A tree requires fifteen years to
reach maturity, bnt produces both
flowers and frnit in the fonrth or fifth
year.
km: Tin: fa ut si:.
I'lifttiitm (lint...
Yellow di uti'iuil me in fivur.
Guipure l.ion has revived again,
bulphur lace is u now importation.
Tearl combs are u Parisian novelty.
Tulo roso is the leading evening color.
A comb of roues fastens up low coiff
ures. Narrow mantelets, like scurf;', nub-h.
now cohtumes.
Turquoise blue-beaded laeu bonnets
are worn by blondes.
Cbrysobcryl is tho technical nanio of
cits' eye jewels.
Violet voiwt coinages arc worn with
white tnoiro trains.
The Jersey jacket Mipcrstduti tho
l'.nglish walking eoat.
Moons and polka dots appear on most
of tho spring dresses.
Hhort and exceedingly boufl'uut polo
uaisscs are very stylinli.
Mustard yellow or yellow brown
cheviot .-.nits uro leud'hg.
Ou flannel dresses the lengthwise
pli uts are slii hed like tucks.
KIbow tleoves, with a deep cut' turn
ed back, uro umoug tho new styles.
Galloons and braids will trim many
spring costumes aud spring jackets.
Two new colors are tho "sunflower
yellow" und a new blue called bleu-do-nier.
Black velvet is combined with bright
yellow tut in in dresses und tho effect is
rich und glowing.
For full evening dress there are bunds
of gold or silver or stringsof pearl worn
iu the hair.
A bride's traveling dress is of pcnrl
gray cufhujero and chamois leuther em
broidered iu steel.
Huii-sutin is a uow glossy woolen stiill
and comes in a stylish pule shade of
Havana brown.
Tho fau is now attached to tho waist
with long loops of ribbon that servo us
a chatelaine fastening.
Pure whito without any yellow or
ecru tingo will bo more fashionable than
the creams and corns.
B'juutiful foulards have grounds of
Fompciian red, with black or golden
brown clusters of blossoms.
Tho Ib'rcctoriu hat will be made oi
dark straw and trimmed wilh trails of
choice French Mowers.
Metal buttons that have Wattoau
scenes ou them, also those imitating
oid coins, are very hauiisonio on bhick
velvet.
Wild cleiua'is and hollyhocks are
embroidered in silver, und white upon
tea gowns of palo laurel-pink ciHi-
nie.c.
Tho autocrats of fashion have dclarc.l
long gloves to be quite passe, and
three-buttoned kids huvo taken their
place.
Soutache braid is still fashionable and
is a neat und etylish trimming for flan
nel costumes of either gray, bluo or
green.
Black, bine und lonion-colurod pocket
handkerchiefs of sheer linen, embroid
ered wilh contrasting colors, tiro among
the novelties.
Tho hair is worn low on tho brow
either in a curly fringe or waved. He-
hind it droops iu tbo nupoofllie neck
in a coil, iu loops or braids.
A small cluster of deep red ro es worn
by a brunette upon a black hat trimmed
with a profusion of lace or ostrich plume
is both handsome and becoming.
Fastidious laditn avoid the wide col
lars and cuffs uow in vogue aud instead
uro only wearing u narrowband of linen
or tho narrowest edge of tulle or Juce.
Tho skirts of last year's ilresses can
bo rejuvenated by nddiug u new Jersey
bodice ( f u shade to mutch, and con
cealing the join by a sash or Grecian
tunic
Neckerchiefs of gray on cream colored
ua-ihiug silk, embroidered nil over in
tiny silk polka dots, und finished with
a five-inch rufll ti,f Oriental luce, are
novel and duinty.
Taking Tune by the Forelock.
At tho buttle of (Srovetou, Htonewall
Jackfou tried au experiment which
nearly frightened a Federal division out
of their boots. Bars of railroad iron
wore cnt np into foot-lengths and fired
from some of his heaviest guns, aud tho
noise these missiles mudo as they went
suiting t'iiough the air was a sort of a
cross between the shriek of a woman
und tho bray of a mule. Tho Federals
listened in wonder at tho first few w hich
bunged throngh the tree-tops, and
presently one of the pieces fell just in
front of a Pennsylvania regiment. A
captain stepped forward to inspect it,
and after turning it over he rushed to
his colonel with the newe :
"Colonel, them infernal robs are firing
railroad iron at us I"
"No !"
"They are, for a fact I"
' Captain, advanco your company to
that ridge and deploy, and tho niinuto
yoa find Jackson is getting ready to fire
freight curs at ns, send me word. I
don't propose to have my regiment
mashed iuto the ground when it can
just as well be decently exterminated
in the regular way !" Fris.:
or it itovs.
Whin Hhnii Thrt Thf lirrsl Tnnl'.
Well, boys, what uro you going to
do? lo you intend to take up a trade,
or go into a store, or try life on a rail
road or ou tho sea?
These questions you will find pre
sented 1 1 you, sooner or luter. Some
uro obliged to answer tlmm early iu life,
before they know exactly what thflques
tions mean, and before they huvo a
chance to look round und find out what
s the best thing for them to do. Hhers
unswer the qiustiou quickly, und tuke
up the first thing that oilers, whether
it in tho best thing or not. I'.wtry
young man is snro of otn thing- i i or
tuiu that l.o wants to make money iu
whatever trade he tries. What do they
ay in that shop? How much can I
nuke iu the trade? Whnt wages dues
thut r:iltoiiil or this steamboat line
pay?
Ho asks these questions, aud then se
lects tho business thut seems to pay the
highest wages with very little thought
ns to whether the business will ay him
the best wages or lint.
Now wo will lo-jk ut this thing. Y'on
want money; I hnusauds of men sll about
you huvo plenty of it, und yet not one
of them will pay yon a dollur a mouth;
you will need u good many dollars every
month as long us you live; how, then,
uro you g. iug to get it? How did these
get their money? They dug it out of
the ground; they got it from the foil fir
from tho sen, or they paid some one to
got it for them.
This makes the wholo mutter very
simple. To get wealth, property or
money you must compel some mau to
give you purt of his or you must dig it
up in a field or you must lish it out of
the sea. Y'ou could go to come man
and take his money, but somehow all
tho men seemed to havo combined and
mado laws, aud appointed policemen
and all thut sort ot thing, and tho first
thing you would find would be a lively
little trial in cour' aud four prison walls
inoiind you.
Whutu muu has is his by lijht, and
society backs him up on his rights,
whether he owns ten cents or ten mil
lions. Now, then, can you compel tiny
man to ftivo you pat t of his money?
Simply, by doing something for him
that ho wants done. If he wants his po
tatoes hoed, if ho wauls his horses fed
and cared for, if ho wants his goods
sold, or his ships und engines guided,
you can do these things und compel him
to pay you for tho work.
Ho it comes to this: You must work
for mouoy. There is no other way.
Bravo, honest boys must work, work I
'Tis no disgrace to dig your money even
out of tho earth. It is there, und it
owos you us good a living us it docs any
other man. Go to work, theu, at once,
aud with it will. Work the way
to labor -put your shoulder to tho
wheel uud muko it revolve, and as it
tHrns couut the dollars und cents, the
contentment und happiness it brings
yon.
Money is never made by touting about
the street corners, or darting, duriu g
working hours, out of evening enter
tainments of, mayhap, a questionable
character, and into this salo.m or thut
billiard purlor ono hundred per cent,
lower und more degraded than when
yon entered. Look, thore is a boy of
perhaps some fifteen or sixteen years, or
it may be thut manhood (or more prop
erly majority) has set its weight of
twenty-one yours upon his broad, strong
shonlders, luring about the corners und
public squures, lazily pulliug tho filthy
smokoof a cheap cigar which ho his
either picked up from the dirty side
walk or been givon him by some equally
worthless companion from his month,
which looks as if soup and water and a
tooth-brush were nonentities in his world
of aimless existence, Fio I Shame
upon these worthless tramps, for all
their high-sounding titles und attributes
neatly chiseled down amount to this,
who sit or lounge about from morning
till night, with their hands idly thrust
into the woruout pockt tu of their
threadbare pants, il. pond. -i t upon the
poor old gray-haired, dim eyed father,
laden aud bent with the weight of his
threescore yours, who n. i t toil ull day
und perhaps far into the night that the
petted darling of the curb may havo
bread to eat and a roof to shelter him.
When tired out with his day's tramping
he eneps iu au hour after midnight
with his breath strongly scented with
common whisky, ai d iunoctnt as to
whether ho is upon his head or feet.
To-morrow he rises at midday and re
peats yesterday's round of occupation,
with, erhaps, this night in the station
house by way of variety. Oh I shame,
shame to you who have brought tears to
the aged eyes and bowed in heart
brenking sorrow the white heads of
your teuder, loving mothers, whoso
happiness und peace should have been
your first care, your first consideration,
and yoor first great incentive to a life of
honor and usefulness. Bnt "sufficient
to the day is tho evil thereof," aud you
can do better if yon will. You can make
home all sunshine and brightness, and
our mother's dour old heart ull joy and
gladness. You can crown your parents'
decliuitig days with prido and comfort;
you can smooth away the sharp thorns
that pierce the weary feet as they travel
on tho downward roud towards the tomb.
And in the days to come, when these
dear, dead hands will be laid low iu the
dust, und tho patient, loving hearts In
stilled forever beneath tint folded tender
hands, you will not, wo promise you,
regret the stop you have taken, the good
resolution you have made to-day.
How are you to begin ? Why go to
work, of course. That is the only way
to be truly good and happy. Yon want
money to live yourself uud to help those
around you live, und yon mut work
for it, or take a shovel and dig it out
of tho ground, in California a nun
turns over the gravel und piekn up !'(.
of gold ; iu l'cuueylvaiiiu men blast
out coal ; in New Jersey men raise
fruit ; iu Vermont men break marble
and :,lato out of thu hill i ; oil' the
ooust men let down lines and bring up
lish. Each of these can sell h's gold,
his apples, his coal, slute, lnari'le, or
cod lish, for money. Kach li.d found
some new wealth .that did not eist be -fore,
and thus, in ttiu, these uivu p row
rich without taking anything from
any one. This is wliut is meant when
it is said thut nil wealth comes out of
tho ground. Every summer the far
mors uud planters ai-o tniliious of
bushels of corn uud millions of pound
of cottcn atid tobacco. All this is new
wealth out of fio ground, aud thus it
is that tho ?outitry grows richer uud
richer every year.
Other men tuke thoe vast stores of
corn uud cotton aud ti'ansplunt them to
the const or to foreign countries, or
they feed the com to cuttle and pig-,
or weave the cotton into cloth, and
thus add still more to tint value of this
weulth. The people who buy the cattle
and tho cloth pay both the farmer and
the niuunfactnrcr, aud thus both get
money.
Now, which of these great trades are
you going iuto '! Do you tueau to dij;
money oat of tho ground in the shape
of corn, c itton, potatoes, vegetables or
fruit? do you mean to cam money
helping to carry these things from one
place to another, or do you mean to
wolk these things over into new chapes,
und thus muko IU' tiey by adding to
their valuo ?
An apple under u tree in a Now Jersey
orchard is worth, perhaps, a ceut. Take
it to tho Washington Market and it is
worth two cents, carry it up town to a
retail store nnd it is worth three rents,
make it up into a tart nt the confection
er's and it will bring four cents. Not
ono of tho four men who handled tho
apple got more than u c ut. The far
mer hud tho first cent because Hie apple
came from u tree thut grow in the
ground ; tho expressman got u ceut for
currying it to murket, and the retail
denier paid these two cents, anil charged
the confectioner uuother for bringing it
to him. The confectioner paid tho three
cents und clnrgcd another con for
cooking the tipple. The person who
uto tho tart paid four cents at the cud.
This shows tho lelatious of the groat
trades- ugricultnro, commerce and
manufacture. Agriculture includes
farming, planting, gardening and stock
raising. Commerce includes the Irans
portution of goods from one place to
another, und the eu-huuge ,i goods,
buying aud selling. Manufacture in
cludes all the trades where men change
one thing into another, muko bricks out
of clay, shoes out of leuther, every li. iug
from oaipentry tn weaving, ship build
ing, glass making, painting, watch mak
ing. Besides theso trades are the pro
fessions where men study particular
subjects and then sell I heir know ledge
for money, nnd these include tho doc
tor, lawyers, editors und many others.
You can choose uuyono of these you
like. The United States itt the i idlest
country iu tho world. It is an agricui -turul
nation and it produces millions of
new nnd real wealth every year. It is ii
vuit country, with great rivers und a
long sea coast. All this agricultural
wealth must bo moved every year and
vast sums of money will be paid to lb"
men who cun do it. There are forty
millions of people aud they want hats
aud shoes, furniture, books and tens cf
thonsiuds of other thiugs. Never was
thero such a chttt.co offered to young
men as here. It is a big country and
there is plenty of room for every muu
able and willing to work. It may bo a
trifle dull in some pluc -s, lv.t there are
tho farms, the l ivers aud tho ruilroads
and all this great nation of penplo.
These things mean business, and some
one is going to get it. Y'on wnut a
chance, an 1 it is the aim of the Press
to take np each trade in turn and to
point ont its advantages and disadvan
tages, to show what its prospects are
and to help yon, as far as m:iy be, to
choose the ono in which you are ni' st
likely to succee I.
"Few women know tho iuiportauco
and value of their beauty until they
havo lost it," was said by Madame
Roland.
The bime-Kilii ( bib.
Tl.o blowing of noses in the north
west corner of Paradise Hall finally
e.iine to un i ud, and when Trustee Full
back hud Hung his whole soul into one
grund effort to cough his head off, und
fuilod, Brother Gardner iiror.o und said :
':My k ntrymen, when you meet a
man who knows just what-' he l.jn ;r
roy a dollar who his friends iu boaf
political patties -who gits invitation
to all church ft stivals who am giner
ally spoken of ns u good feller, you
have l'oiiu' a mun who makes a study of
human natttr'. Do student of anatomy
carves up a cadaver to diskiver how do
bi nes urn put logeder whur' do mtis
ties lie how do vital organs urn uailed
ou. De good feller studies do liviu'
'ste'id of de 'lead -do mind 'stead of the
body. Dohumau ttind am full o' co'us.
Tread on unci f 'i m an' dat' am a back
iicshun to or.ee. If 1 should want a
live-dollar bill airly M jnday niornin' I
should slip over an' ux'Dcakou J.icksou
for it. His big eo'n am de belief dat
no cue kin be saved onions he am bup
ti" I in de fiber, and I have bin kterful
to walk nil nroiin' d it eo'n. I go obcr
to his house wid u j:u; u' cider in out)
Im' au' baptismal aigyments in de
odder, an' sometimes he feels so good
dat he'd like to douse ni in the rain
bar'l.
"If I wanted some onion uds I'd go
over to Elder Tiffs'. I e Elder's co'u
am a belief dat he wus bo'n fur a great
prni' her. I've walked all ober him a
hundred times, but I.e neber stubbed
my toe agin dat eo'n, I've sot down
nith Ir.tu an' praised do build of hi'
head, :m' de shape of his mouth an' his
p'.se and gestures, uud I.e stuck to de
clia'r while In; talked u;i' cavorted fur a
s! night hour. If I wanted onions he'd
fall down collar to git 'cm fur me.
' When you c me ucioss a man who
imagiues dat he um an orator, donn'
gibe his booms ; it won't hurt anybody
to let him keep right on liukiu' so, but
it will make him your deadly inemy if
yon try to conwiuce him dat he was cut
utit fur ii l lacksmif. Dar' um people
who write s;.itl' a-)' cull it poetry. lac
got a l.aybor who writ forty-four varses
of such stuff las' full, an' lead it to me
an' axed my cu'idid opinyuu. Did 1
tell her it was bosh V Did 1 jump frew
de winder when she re.iched de second
varse '.' Not much I I listened wtd de
utnios' diligi uce, an' when she litiished
de I ts' line I advised her to publish u
book o' poem-1. Do ne' week I fell
i"l., au' dat poetess Was fust, on de
gn ti'i' wid cbi.'keu-l.i oth an' currant-
jell.
"When 1 moot it mau who aui sart'n
dat our city giiv'ruent will go to smash if
he doun' git oflice, I iucon.t ge him I
iuc "iir.ige do young to become Wu'hing
t us 1 inconrage de ole to hang on till
de world has Io rccogui.e deir greatness.
A word ut de right time means de loan
of a dollar menus thirty oil' when you
want n new whitewash brush uioaus u
bushel o' lime flee gratis - moans a
recommend if yen want tojiuede pur
leccn fo'ce. Tech my co'ns an' I'll want
to kick ye. Ml men am dc same. Call
'cm co' lis or call m hobbies, but he
who goes slasliin' around widout caring
whar' he puts his b i t will make iwenty
inemies wlmr' hegainsor.o friend. Study
your man. Tak" him apart -put him
togedor - tin' out liar' his cj'us l.iy. an'
do!' step high nil' softly." ',. ';..
A Welsh Scrtnnt.
In Wales, a niuid iu servitude is con
sidered much more r 'spcetablo than the
ftic'.ory girl, or indeed any other r.irl
wh.i works with hi r hands, unless it be
the girl "in business,'' who is what
Americans politely call a "salclady,"
though in Grout P.ritian she is not in
frequently a ucller of gin and beer - or
iu other words a bar maid Bar keep
ers of lb uiiseuiiiie gender, it may be
remarked by the way, are nearly un
known iu Wales, unless au exotic of
American origin. The masculine bar -tender
of Americ.i is un outgrowth of
pioneer roughness - n condition of so
ciety in which pistols and bowie knives
were mauy. and womeu few. There is
hardly a better servuut in the world than
a really good Welsh maid. She nwre
nearly approaches the best French model
than any other I have known. Of course
she has not the training in certain pol
ished customs which tho French ser
vant has, but her deftness, alacrity and
politeuess nrt equally great. The po
liteness of a servant to n;i employer
is as clear and fair a thing as any polite
ness on earth. Its proper expression is
far removed from servility. The ser
vuut in Wales who is not polite is
thought to be lacking iu the social cul
ture befitting his or her station. The
wages of servants, while very much be
low those now so common in tho United
States, are, ns a rule, better than the
earnings of any other women on their
soc'iil plane. A situation iu a wealthy
family is something to hope for and
dream of a genuine social elevation to
the d: nghters of the humble cottagers.
Iu tho spring of ltWi William Peun
with eleven others purchased East Jer
sey. Ho embarked for that colony in
September of the name year.
1 lie DanilolliHK.
'Hi. . 1 a 1 1 I lions "ii the lawn,
That "pel at nijjli'. yellow briulit !
l!n' i re ,i sMiniii. r u huh la gnno
Tli ".i'-t . liiitiKcl towbio , iiii.l any lijdi',
Art lioric by It. up aii l mi.
To I' ft. I rilit, soon out of Mijjlit.
M v ti ii'ii'K y. t. ii' li a b as.'ii tlm,
l"n il in tin' l'l.i ', next is .limy ;
An I hi. li ivi-i so ttitli us.
A iiu'.-l oiiiynf tirav. nii'l
Wliii,. . it. li ..ti. I.II..W- that i ncli mi" must
."s. ii loin I., p'tay un l pass away.
IIT.MS OF INTEREST.
A grout boro tho Hudson rivor tun
nel. Tho predominant colors of the male
oriole are black and orango.
The year J'JUO will bo the last year of
tiio nineteenth century.
The iui'ials C. S. I. after Edwin
Arnold's name stand for civil service,
India.
Tho largest shipping business done
in the world is done ut Liverpool,
England.
Thomas ( asey, bookkeeper for R. A.
Eckles, grocer, of Leadville, has ab
sconded. His accounts aro short 7,000.
iambliug was the cause.
The clergymen of Chicago ale deter
mined to put a stop to Sunday night
theatricals. They euu do it by giving a
better show themselves, so as to draw
the crowd uud muko tho theaters lose
mouoy. Fuir competition is always
allowable.
A Louisville boy stole his mother's
mocking-bird und sold it to a man who
hud just lost ou", taking flic dead bird
in exchange. The good lady was over
whelmed ut the dei.th of her pet and
gave him a tearful burial, at which her
son, the money jingling in his pocket,
assisted with great solemnity.
The three Mondays spoken of by old
writers us being unlucky are : The
first Monday in April, which day Abel
was slain ; second, the first Monday of
August, tho day Sodom and Gomorrah
were confounded ; third, the third
Monday of December, on which day
Judas Iscariot was boro.
The St. Louis Pimt-lK.-tj-nlch pub
lishes accounts of tho winter wheat
crop from over one hundred nnd fifty
different points in Kansas, Missouri,
Illinois, Juiiiinu, Ohio, and Michigan,
ull 'd which aro quite favorable, and
represent the wheat crop in an advance
stab1, and the prospects for a good crop
to be vorv fine.
Ill MOKUl S.
A St. Louis editor found a nickel on
the street, and wrote a hulf-column edi
torial ou ' Our Increase of wealth."
"Why, are you alive yet, my old friend?
I heard you wero dead." "Nice friend,
you are. Y'ou didn't even come to my
funeral."
Au Irish editor says "that in the ab
sence of both editors, the publishers
havo succeeded iu securing the services
of n n iiili-iii'iv to edit the paper this
Week."
A lazy fallow onco declared in public
company that ho couldn't lin el bread for
his family. "Nor I," replied an indus
trious mechanic; "I um obliged to work
for it."
The heroine of u recent iesthotic novel
published iu England, remarks: "Mar
riage is like u bag of snakes in which
there is one eel. I suppose, dearest,"
turning to Ler lover, "you are the eel."
"Have u plnco for everything, and
everything in its place." Somehow or
other this won't work; we have a big
plae'e for our wealth; but we'll be hang
ed if we can put it tbere We haven't
any.
Tkii iikh - Feminine of fnur? First
bright boy Hasn't any. Teuchei-Next.
Second bright boy Nuu. Teacher
That's right. First bright boy indig
nantly ejaculates That's just what I
said.
Eosa McWhortk-berry heard her mas
ter remark ut the dinner table the other
day tlint Kismet nietiut "fato," and this
is the reason why she o astonishoel her
mistress by remarking the next day to
Belinda, the chambermaid, "Oh, Ba
lmily, I cun scarcely walk wid the big
chilblains over my two Kismets."
A New Y'ork paper says the will of the
rich ma" o' the future will read: "To
tho respective attorneys of my children
I give my entire estate and worldly
goods of ull description. Personally to
the children and to my bedoved wifo I
give ull that retnuius." This instrument
will satisfy the family and save the
trouble of proving tho old man insane.
"Well, what do yon want here?" re
marked Mr. Smith, as he sat np in bed
aud addressed a professional burglar,
who stood in front of tho bureau. "I
want money and bonds," hissed the bur
glar through his edenched teeth, "and
quick about it, too." "My friend," re
tortenl Smith, "I've been looking for
thoso things for the last twenty years
without success; but go on with your
bnrglury, I'm aleepy."
( o. la yiel.ln to onions lido magic, but Dr.
Hull's I'oiiIi Syrup i a still better ami by far
more aKi ei'iililii nifuna of curing a Cold or
Ch'ikIi. Von i an buy a bottli for 25 canto at
any (Iran "lorn, aid we ar mire it will do the
work every titno.
if.'
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