Il)c l)atl)am ttccorb. II. A. TOIYIDOlV, EDITOR AND PKOPRIETOK. TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION, HATES ADVERTISIW C One square , one insert ion j One square, two insertions Olio square, iiiii' liiontli $1 00 I. AO - 2.50 One ropy, nno vi hC - - . - If 2.00 One ropy, six month .... $1,00 One copy, three months ... m V"l QI ""r 'arKf'r advertisements liberal con l'U 50 i tracts will be made. VOL. VI. PITTSB01lO CHATHAM CO., N. C, MAY 15, 1884. $l)c l)ntl)nm ttccor&. iii m i ii 1 i II n ii Four Season. Ppring is n ninth-n divinely JUir, With violets hlne in her gulden hnir. At till! balmy toiu-h of her dainty feet, Tho priinni-e pale, mid com slip sweet l'irt forth from their wintry winding-she t. Anil the foreM leaves pi rp out to see Who tlii l-cnntilitl, hoiiiitifnl iimiil run he. Summer's 11 wairior fln-hcd with fnme. He i ides o'er eiirth in his enr !' fl line. His whip i the whirl w ind's ciivlin;; lash. His sh, ml is the ilialexiii llmndcrV crash. Ilis spear ii the i;;hi nine's hi wling flash. He liciithc, and the hill- arc parched mid tin And the rhnh I . hiding, in vapors fly. A n 1 1 1 inn '- ii nieivh.nit of princely mien. 'I he eiulli n I e-t finCs nt In- feet arc seen. Ilis wornlm-i- spue- ol golden Haiti Aie (j tinned hih on the sunlit plain. And How like -en o'er his rieh domain j And hii iint-lcow n elcldieji iltutit willi glee A- ite pcle I hi- ticasnre-. pieiiiid his Knee. Willlel' (I llinle-tt-r of fiendish -;ilisi, Wi'li l imine iiml uoe in hi- It di-ltd eyes, lie Mights Ihe eii i1h hi- ie htc.nh. He ii ein;;es the hie Ii .in tin' Inn I hriip'i'h. 'J he wnti in lie hindi in Ihe chains ol tlc-tlli. And he hin;;!i. to he ir tle plaintive wail 'I the fum-liin.' poor in the dozen vale. V. .1. Carptnttt. A Marvellous Metamorphosis ( HAI TI It I. TOO THIN. "No, it hti n-Irt'd times no!" she ex claimed. "Ami wliy iId y'u icfiise nie," he 1 1 ; n I 1 . ' I inn rich, well-educated, and iiiom' in th best society. Again I a-k, why do yon reltic me?" "Because." s'nwly replied the ticnu tifiilgirl, deliberately surveying her w ould lio sweet hi tu t from hrail to fon:, "because 1 iln not admire a living skoh ton." 'Wha- wha what!" gasped Bona parte Osseous: "iln yon mean to insinu ate that I am a keleton ?" "You can ilrawyoiir ewn inferences, sir," coolly replnd Fatima Oleo. "I know I am attenuated." sighed Bonaparte, "hut with kind treatment and a swect-temiicrcil inotlu r-in-law, 1 may some luy outrival even your generous proportions." Miss Oleo iviH a good girl, weighing 175 pounds, ami took a pardonable pride in her ublritsivt' obesity. On the other hand, young Osseous diil'nt weigh much nmie than a kit of mackerel. It was no woiub'r, then, that when ever they appeared together in tnlli whether iiaiadiut,' in Central I'ark, or liroinenadin 1'il'lh Avenue, they n tt raited ei'iisideralile attention, and elicited many uncomplimentary re marks. The la-t time Im took her to church some In artless wretch wroto tho follow ing lines mi the 11 v leal' of a hymn book iiml handed the volume, to Miss Oleir There nn a Ihln iiinn utioln.l n tat wife. Kill ite. I:it wife, 1 1 1 l lli - In i ! Hie liine I likca iliiiin. ainl In' Ii i lifi', Anil II look all In., im no v (iMrci" tier. To til, her. I.o l l.lc.hcr, 'lo llo io her. When .she read the verse iho did not faint, but then and there lirmly resolv td never to wed a bavfof bones. There fore, when Mr. Osseous proposed she flatly refused to entertain the offer of either his heart or his attenuated anat. oiny. When he expressed the hope that he migtji. sume day attain the magnificent magnitude of Miss oleo, she gave him a glance of supremo scorn, and advised him to immediately make application for tho position of "freak" in a dime museum. "Never mind, Miss I'alitna," said he, as he tottered towards the door, "the day will como when you will be proud to place your.-elf under my protection." And as he rattled out of the room the racket he made sounded like an over ture of castanets. C'lI.Vl'TI'.It H. TOO THICK. The faff win thi 't en the river, The feg wan tMek in the street. Aud tlm Kaslii;! ' - ll: kerini: ipner No Miadrw .a-l III the feel Of the IniiiKi v threap tleil lionu ward hW-d To JciMryur liroeki.Mi, N"oinl Hie liilc. "It is too provoking,"' :-aid Miss Oleo' to her friend Miss Margery, whom sho was accompanying to the Desbrosses fritreet Ferry, about a year after her refusing Mr, Os-eous, "that this fog should swoop down like the Assyrians upon the fold. It is to thick that 1 can scarcely see, and I know my crimps are all out of curl" "I don't care as much for that as I do the dangc" of crossing the river," replied Miss Margery, who lived in Jersey City. "If you are afraid I will go home with you," said Miss Oleo, bravely. "I would like nothing better than to run the risk of being wrecked, even on a ferry-boat." "I should be pleased to have you come with me, "said her friend. "When we reach the other side, you can tele graph your folks so they will not feel worried at your absence." After a delay of half an hour the boat started on its perilous voyage. The cabin was crowded, aud the two young ladies were obliged to stand up until the stalw art form of a man arose ii nd with a bow offeied his seat to Miss Oloo, and so quickly disappeared n the mist that sho did not catch a ;limpse of his features. "What a line-looking man!" ehe claimed. "Now, if poor Bonaparte iid such a splendid physique as that. I might have " "Of wliniit are you speaking?' i ked Mi.s Margery, who occupied an t Ijacent seat vacated by a .small boy vho went out to catch some fog. "Oh, only one of my old admirers nhom I rejected a few months ago." "Vou mean that thin little chap who iooked as if he never cast a shadow V' "Ves; do yon remember him?" "Perfectly well; my brother once snocked him down by breathing on ii i in." "I'm not surprised at that, for when he was courting me I used to blow him out of tho front door with my litn. Poor fellow! I wonder what has become of him V" "I heard that he had joined 15;irniim's circus." "If that is true, I will go there this very week." said Miss Oleo, "I've al ways admired freaks." -lust then the boat struck the pier with such force that a portly old gen tleman plunged head forward into Miss Oleo and knocked her senseless. t iiaptki: III. TOOTH OI T. "Stand back! (live the lady air!"' were tho .shouts that arose as a crowd gathered around the stalwart form of the young lady. Smelling botths were offered, and restoratives applied; but all in vain. "She must not lie there!" streamed a dapper lilt lo man, w ho danced around as though he were dodging a swarm of bees. "Take hr to the waiting-room,"' suggested aslim, who looked as if he couldn't lilt the light end of a heavy i cigar. j Hut no one seemed equal to the em- i eigeticy until the gentleman who had ; given her his seat made his apprar- j ant e. lie t ink in the situation at a glance, and da-hod aside tho gaping! bystanders with such vigor that he knocked the front Uc'.'i out cl three ex pugilists. lit-then gentlv raised tho vomitr lady and lore her from the boat as if, she wero only a halv, and deposited ' his (air burden in the ferry superin-I tendent's olliee. . Thou lifting his hat ' i he vanished in the fog. i When Miss Oleo regained conscious- ; ness and exhaled some of the fog which j she had swallowed while gasping for : breath, she murmured: "Take me home." A carriage was call- d, and, aceompa. nied by Miss Margery, she rccrossed the river. On her way homelier friend told her of the stalwart stranger's bravery, aud his apparent bashfulness about dis closing bis identity. "If I should ever find out who ho. is I know I shall fall in love w ith him," said MKs tle .. "Why, how' will you reeoguize biui, if you didn't see his face "Ah, my dear girl, don't you suppose I was sensible enough to keep one eye open when he raised me in his arms? It isn't every day that a woman of my weight gets a chance to bo borne away by ;t modern Hercules." When they reached tho elegant home of Miss Oleo, in Madison Avenue, she had entirely recovered, aud entered the house w ithout assistance. ( IIAl'TI H IV. TOO l.TTI.ItI.Y TOO. Miss Oleo occupied it box at Bar nu.n's circus a few days after her adventure on the river, and as sho gazed at tho bewildering scenes before her, she became enthusiastic, particu larly when muscular feats were exhib ited; for mIi wax a great admirer of manly strength. The antics nf the clowns wearied her; the circumgyrations of the trapeze caused her lo yawn; tho majestic marches of tho mammoth eh-phants reminded her too forcibly of her own weighty movements, and the thrilling music of the brass band fell heedicsly upon her ears. Hut when tho lofty tumblers began to whirl through the air with the great est of ease and turn somersaults with the grace of a boomerang.then ht reyes lighted up and her attention was riv eted on the agile athlete-. Suddenly one powerfully built fel low sped swiftly over the spring-board, leaped high into space, and revolved like a pinwheel over the backs of a dozen elephants. As thunders of applauso shook fte edifice and stirred the surface of the sawdust around, she softly murmur ed: "It is he, but oh, how changed!" It was indeed ISonapnrto Osseous; but no longer the frail being who formerly sought in vain his own shad ow. Ho was now a veritable Titani whose muscular development was theenvyofhis fellow gymnasts and the delight of his life, His wonderful performmee on thi j particular occasion was due to bij feeing his former sweetheart a ho wa about completing his third somersault in mid-air. The spectacle so exhilar ated him that ho superseded all hi? previous efforts by making three more turns before he alighted. His triumph was complete. That uight the place which once knew him so well, knew him no more forever. One evening there came a ring at the door-bell of Miss Oleo's home which was strong enough to havt brought out tho department, and the stately tread of the renovated Bo naparte Osseous resounded in the curri dor. "I have come once more," ho said, in a voice that shook the chandeliei itnd made the piano strings vibrate, "to bend the knee before Gotham's peer less beauty." "Nay, do not bend the kneo here," she said, ""for the house will not stand the jar, 1 fear. But tell me in what manner you effected this metamorpho sis." "When I left this hoaso at your command many weary months ago," he replied, "I lirmly resolved not only to make myself your equal in avoir dupois, but to win your love. since then I have done nothing but. swing Indian clubs and light dumb-bells. The last dumb-bell I lifted was on a ferry-boat, when I carried you oil. Then " "pont spe ik of it. Honey; it was then I lii'sl dis-oered how manly and nolde you wete, although 1 did not recognize you." "I have ;it last succeeded in winning your admiration ?" "This is my answer," she shyly an swered, as sho ilung herself into li if arms. A few months previous this shock would have crushed him like an egg shell, but now he held her as if she were a feather. The wedding will soon take place. Meanwhile Bonapartejhas completely conquered tho animosity of his pros pecMvc mother-in-law, and as for his betrothal's male relatives be says, if necessary, he will challenge them to sinl..- i-nmb.!t. or tl;;ht the whole of them with his hands tied behind his back. From a thin tenor he lias developed into a robust basso-prol'uudo, and liij greatest delight when he is alone, is tu thunder the following song, composed by his bride-elect: Oh, oiH'e I was thin hii a rail, And eerv hie- e inaile Ine iall; W l.i!,' the I. II. .s would lauli To .'. M-.e, like i h.ili, Sweep m-iftly In-fore the Kale. I'or low I'ai a-l j-:inli:a.-a l.nrse. Anil inv power the pi'iipie ii.iloi'Ki-: When I naik I !iriaii;li the Mrtajt All the ladie- I meet Admire iue hugely, of course. "Key.?," in A'ew York Journal Soldiers Dying of Home-Sickness. "Do you know that many soldiers died of homesickness during the late war V" said an ex-Federal colonel, to a Washington correspondent of the Philadelphia ' eon'. "Ves, sir; they called it nostalgia- that's the medical term for homesickness. Men died ap parently without a cause not from fright; hoinesiekne-s was the cau-e in nine cases out of ten. I remember that at one time 1 was in charge of a depot at Louisville, Ky., where lii.OOO convalescents wero waiting for strength to go to the front. I noticed that many of them grew worse in stead of better. It puzzled tho sur geons. It was not duo to a relapse; it was not the old diseaso at all. It did not seem to be a new disease. I looked into it a little, and then told the surgeon that it was nothing but nos talgia. I had a chance to prove that I was right, t ine of these sick well men came to me next day. "Colonel," he said, "I want a leave of absence for a day or two. 1 want to go home and see my folns. 1 am pining away for a sight of my old home. 1 believe I shall die if I don't go." On inquiring 1 found that his home was right across in Indiana, and that he had an idea that he could see smoke rising from tho chimney. Ho had not been home for several years, and he was fretiing away in sight of that smoke. I was not supposed to let my convalescents go anywhere except to the front, but I determined to try an experiment with this sallow, peak-faced young man. Weil, sir,' I said, 'how long will you be gone?' 'This is Friday, 'he replied; 'I will be back on Monday.' 'No,' I said; 'you can stay until Friday of next week.' 'AH right,' he said, look ing better already, On the next Fri day he returned a new man. 'I'm all riht again, colonel,' he half shouted when he saw me; 'I'm ready to go to the front at once. 1 went home, saw my mother and father, and my sisters and brothers, bad seme good home food and some good home sleep, and fought all my battles over again down at the village store. That was all that I wanted.' It was tho fact. 11; had been cured of nostalgia. CillLIMiKVS OM MX. Juxt Tall J iioiiu-Ii. Phe tr.ok inv cut I i rch -i t -ill, And she is nut m i--ry; Tht! stepi led upward from Ihu h ill: .'111- Hints!, tllC liMie fairy, tie-l halaiictxl on the -eemd -tair, .My leaf-coal's Inii e n linldin', And then her hard-- ilic kindest pair 'Hie collar ilow i wen' f tiding. There never was an e; e -n clear, Nor lips so red in ncn in;-, "Just tall enouiih, i-m am i t, dear? Hee how I'leKitooi fn,m loving!'' Jnil tall enough! I nnn eu- to ey.i b'an It-ii-ixont.il li;;' I. "Ju-t tall enon;;h t -. t me try? Ye, tall eiioiijjh jr n d nilit V - .'Vii.'i; .lei Call. Trie Chl.ii's Imntr, Little Nellie '.o-y: hid lost h'-r father, and her mother was poor. Her sweet temper and winning ways gained her many friends. Among them was an excellent lady, Miss Norton. A glimpse of Nellie's bright face peeping in at tho door always bro.tght a smile of peculiar tenderness over Miss Norton's placid features. Sho loved to si!, Iy the child, softly stroking her hair, ami w hile looking into her smiling eyes, would often say, "Poor, pour Nellie!" When Nellie shook her head, with n heart, too happy to f--rebode evil, her friend would caress her still more fondly, end then say, " Poor little Nellie!" The ihiM's heart seemed troubled by these pitying words, for she a iked one day, "Why do you rail mo poor? Please don't. Miss Norton. I'm not poor why, I've got twenty-live rents and a good mother!" 1'iiinUy Visitor. " t llllilli IMII.V." One blight day in .lime, IV 31, group of miners who h:nl jut linNhed their work were standing around Wy. lam Pit. near Newca-tlo, England. Word was pas-od from one to an other that a baby boy had 1 n born in old Hob's cabin, old Bob, Ihe en gineinan nt the pii. had a houseful of children already, but he and his wife had plenty of love for the new comer, whom tiny called (Icordie. Wee tleoidii' Stephenson was not born with u silver sp ion in iiH mouth. His father'.-, h ; e was a rotioh hut, with ittiphiitered walls and a lb" r of clay. (leordio began to work when ho was less than seven y-ars old, at twopence per day. A lady paid him th s sum for looking after her cows. When a little older, ho was taken on at the colliery its a "picker." receiving six pence it day, and at fourteen he became his father's assistant at a shilling a day. A year or two later he was given the charge of an engine of his own. It became bis ;ct, and never had engine better care. At eighteen years of.-ago fieorge Stephenson could not read. He was wide awake, and had a great longing for knowledge, but did not understand the alphabet. This could not bo borne. lie went to a night school, and paid threepence a week to be taught spelling, leading, and writ ing. and soon a Scotch minister who knew him undertook to leach him figures. He worked very hard, and made great progress. In his leisure hours, when he was not busy with - his engine or studying, be made and mended shoes. Bit by bit he baved a little money, and by-and-by was able to marry. 1 suppose you are wondering what all this has to thi with Pulling Hilly. Have patience; I am coming to that part of my story. Though James Walt had invented the Working steam-engine, as yet then was no travelling steam-engine. It was tieorge Stephenson who lirst laid rails, found mil what the locomotive could io when attached to cars, and sent tho iron horse spinning along tho line. His lirst locomotive was ctuled Pulling Hilly. If you were to peep into some (if the public journals of the England of 1.XI5 you would laugh at the frigid the peo ple felt at this monster, which fed on coals and water, and flew over the road at the rate of eighteen miles an hour. Some thought it was like witchcraft. Others gravely said that one might ie well be shot off by a rocket at unco m put themselves at the mercy of such machine its this. George Stephenson kept quietly on, plodding at everything he attempted, until he had found out its secrets. Whatever he did he did with all his might. When men opposed him he did not lose bis temper, but only said, "Wait a while and you will see." "Suppose, Mr. Stephenson," said a grumbling somebody, thinking he was advancing a terrible objection to the new iron horse "suppose, cowshou d happen to be on your line?" " Well," replied Stephenson, very coolly, "it would l? a bad job for the roo."' So it is all through life, boys When a brave, wise ir an hits a new and brilliant thought, it will never be put a stop to by any coo." Jltirjur' Young reoyle. Ml'RDEKOUS IMFI'LSIS. Men Mho Are giidtlenty N-lzed Willi n lleilre to lilll itoiiietiutly. "Considering the number of cases id homicidal an I suicidal impulse that come under the nolice of experts in nervous diseases,'' a distinguished specialist remarked lo a New Vol k Sun reporter, "it is a wonder to me that so few tragedies from that source really happen. East week a business man in this city, w ho ow ns a hand -1 some country residence on the Ilud- son, and would be regarded by bis ac I quaintances as the last person in the world to be possessed by such a whim, came to me in great worry of mind aud told nie he bad something to com municate that must bo held strictly in violate. Tho stoiy was typical. 1 have heard it with trilling variations it thousand times in live years. He had Dot been feeling very well rather nervous and ill at case for some days. That morning, as he left the house to take the Iriiin for New Vork. he hap., pened to pass his gardener who wits nt work on the grounds, and stopped to talk to him a minute. The man was stooping over a clump of ornament;! shrubbery, thinning out the dead stalks with a pruning knife. A spade was leaning against the trunk of a tree just at his hand. 'I had never had any quarrel or misunderstanding with tin man," said this patient, telling bis story. 'But the impulse wits upon ine in an instant to sei. o that spade and brain the poor fellow on the spot. J trembled all over like a leaf, wilh a kind nf nervous terror t'.iat 1 ran scarcely do-i-ribe to nil. Doctor. Finally, net daring to trust myself longer, I turrit d and w alked away its fast as my leg- could conveitieiilly carry ine. I believe, sir, that I should have killed the man if I had lingered live minutes longer. Now w hilt is to be done?" " The doctor advis-il his patient to nvoid temptation lor a few days, turn his initid fcsolutclv In soiii'thing lis", tuid e.-tve him a s-d.ttivo prescription - -bromides, of course with instruc tions to call again in it day or two. The man was sen ible enough to act on the inlvi- e. and on the fourth day he dropped in and told the doctor that the trouble had passe I off, and he felt like himself once more. And so a tragedy was averted, probably. The physician went on to say that lie had no less than nine eases uf homi cidal or .suicidal impulse tin n undrr treatment. Of these seven were sui citlal and the other two homicidal' One ol the latter had been on bis hands for three weeks. The patient, a man ol some note in literature, had been sleepless for several weeks before the impulse manifested itself. Ho was a married man. and loved his wife de votedly. One night, after doing a few minutes with terrible dreams, ho awoke with a strange presentiment of Impending disaster. His wife was Bleeping quietly. The moonlight, struggling through the window-pane, fell upon her face and white, shapely throat. As sudden as the leap of a tiger, the impulse seized him to cut the woman's throat, ami he was actually out of bed and hunting for his razor in the bureau drawer, before any realiz ing senso of the enormity of the deed that he was about to perpetrate inter posed to prevent the tragedy. lie re. turned to bed, and lay in a tremble till daylight. His wife never knew how near she had been to death. He bad had no wish to kill anybody else as yet "Ono of my suicidal patients," con tinued tho doctor, "was lirst seized with the impulse on a Brooklyn ferry boat. He hal been across the river on business, and was on his way back He went on board one of the boats at the Fulton Ferry, and stood gazing listlessly at the rampart of business houses extending far to the right on Ftirman street. The boat started sud denly as he stootl ruminating. He in sists that the impulse had its origin in irritation of the retina caused by the movement of the sunshine-flooded sur faces of brick across the optic field, and very likely be is right. 'For an in stant,' ho says, 'I wits wild; and w In n I came to myself my hand was on tin railing, and a couple ol stdwait pas sengers had collared me. 1 had never thought of such a thing as committing suicide except as a coward's resource.' Now," added the dm t -r. "this man was no more mad than I am; it. was a typical ( a-eof suicidal impulse, caused, perhaps, by long nervous tension." In point of fact, both suicidal and homicidal impulses appear to be far less frequent with women than men. In all his experience, the Doctor has treated only five cases of the impulse in women, while of the sterner sex his patients have been numbered by scores. He inclines to tho belief that the hahi1 contracted by men of business of always being in a hurry, engaged, occupied, is one of the principal instrumentalities, uext to malaria poisoning, in producing this type of nervous disturbance. "And J I imagine," he concluded, "that our former Commissioner of Lunacy, Dr- j Crdronuaux, was not far out of the way when he declared that one man in every handled wh walks the streets is potentially it murderer or a suicide; a rtartling declaration, but one that my own practice during the last ten years has abundantly verified." Sometimes the impulse is accom panied by voices in the ears, urging the patient to kill; sometimes a red light lurid, dismal, weird suffuses the eyes, and with one of the Doctor's patients the attack is announced inva riably by a premonitory shiver or shudder of momentary duration only, which precedes it by a second or two. It is a curious fact, also, that serious organic trouble with the brain and spinal trad seldom gives rise to these strange paroxysms. COST OF 1,1V I. NH ABMOAD. Iiilrrestlnu Contrast IWwn-n I'rli e In l.omlti'i iiml In A iiit-rlea. A London letter to tin- Philadelphia ';(. says: There is no city in which you can get more for a sixpence or less for a guinea than in London. Tl.is was wha' liichard Hush, Ihe American diplomatic representative to England, said away back in the twenties. These words are in true to-d iv as they wpre when tin.' shrewd, iib.ervaut. American gave utterance to them, Bread to-diiy is -iie.ip-ii- in Lo:i 1-ia than in Nvt Vork, Vienna, Berlin or Brussels. Vou can get a suit of chdhes made to meas ure from real Notch Tweed for fashionably cut and well finished. Hundreds id tailors will be glad to tako your measure and furnish a well-litting suit of co!ti!iii!i, but still fair material, for K. I can buy ready made shoes for $2."i'i every bit nsirood as I can pur chase in New Vork for $"i, while for that sum I can get as g I a pair of hand sewn iindeistan.liiigs" as I w ish to wear. A good silk hat i.iay bo bought for and a derby of the latest fashion f.iratriile over ."jO. Mints and j underwear are o.w than t wn-t birds tho : price asked for i hem in New Vork, and the gl-.ves I wen- cost on- ',"' cents a I pair, and I b.ive never yet found tht in j 'o split or t-jtr. I.ad'c-s' aMin- is pro-j portion, i!o!y i-li- a.'. I - - - os and rooms maybe ha I Witnin iwo and one-half miles of the city, with gardens four times us large as the area the residence stands on, for a rental of jMoO to $200 per annum; a return fare by rail to the city costing from tl to N cents, daily. Vegetables aro about, half the price I they are in the states. Butter is live! cents a pound chenpc r,and meal only is a j dear commodity. Not nearly so much dearer though as is gene; ally supposed. ' Vesterday. 1 bought a leg of excellent mutton for J'1 cents per pound, and for prime joints of beef the butchers aro asking -1 ends per pound. Then, again, hsh is rniieuiousiy cheap. 1 read in an Exeter paper that herring j were sold in that town one day last; week at the rate of twenty-four for 3 j cents and thai sprats were retailed at 2 1 cents per quart. But Mr. Hush was as right about the purchasing power of the guinea as he , was in his estimate of the liberal eqtiiv- 1 alent obtainable for the nimble sixpence1 ' In the west end uLondou the most ex- j tortionale prices are asked by the trades" : men. Fifteen dollars for a pair ol trousers and $:!" for a coat and vest aro ' by no means exceptional prices, ami ' there are plenty of knights of the shears who would charge $(iil for it suit of even- ing dress that ono could readily match j at a city tailor's. for $"". 1 know sever- , al "snips" that are glad to array rus- ' tamers in all the alory of'V'nw 'hammer' : coat, low cut vest and pan's en suite for j $ l"i. London boarding houses are an i abomination antl a snare. One can get ! infinitely better accommodation and' food in Philadelphia. Baltimore or Bos- ' ton for $'i per week than can be pro-! cured in London for double the money, i liailway traveling, too. is much more j expensive in England 1 han in America. Even the third-class is, 1 think, quite ! as expensive as the uniform fare j charged in tho states, and to make a journey of a few hundred miles in aj lirst-class carriaoe will cost at least .'() per cent, more than in covering a like distance of gro'.n-l in the state journey ing in luxurious casein a Pullman car. Aliened Sure Cares. I he Mi (ii it! Ilnmr has the following receipts: A tea made of chestnut leaves and drank in place of water will cure Ihe most obstinate case of dropsy in a few days. A tea made of ripe or dri"d whortle. berries and drank in place nf water is a sure and speedy rare for scrofula difficulty, however bad. A tea made of peach leaves is a sure cure for kidney iliMU-nlty. A plaster ma le of fresh slaked lime and fresh pine tar is it sure cure for a ancer, which, with its roots, will come out. Work. Some tind work where some find rest, And so the neiuy world $,k on; I sometimes wonder which is htist ; The antovcr comes when life is pins. f-tinie eye- sleep when some eyr.-s wake, And so the dreary iii'ht hours po. f-ome hearts lieal where sunn: hearts hreuk; J iiflen wonder why 'tis so. Some hands fold, where other hands Are lilted lirnvely in tin- strile; And so ihro' iikcs and thru lands Men- oh Ihe two CMreliie- ot life. Some h et halt while omc leet Ireai'., In tireless iiinivh, a tlioinv way; Some struh- im where sonic have (led; Some seen, when others slmn the Iruy Some sleep on w hile olhers keep The vigils ol'lhe true and hraie; 1 he will not re-t till nw creep Aii-inal their name, ahove a grave. imioitors. A base baw l -"Out mi a fly!" Iligh-borne -The man in the balloon The best pla e jo loaf is in a bakery, A court ing ow l's siting sign To wit: To woo. A buck in;: horse is frequently the power behind Ihe thrown. A carpet is I ke a small boy; it ha? to be beat cii to be cleaned. " This is Hi- tirst robbin' of th" sea son," siing Ihe jail bird as he picked the pocket of a fellow -prisoner. Somebody ha - started a comic paper in sibt ri.t. All jokes having reference to "a cold day" are rigidly excluded. "Here is that little sum that I owe you." "Ah! 1 had completely forgotten it." "You should have tM me that sooner!" .1. Frankland IVmbcrton, of London, has written a defence of po"liy, but the waste ha-V imnufactorics aro still running on full time. Leap year gives women the privi lege of whistling when they want to it op ;i horse car. But. unfortunately, leap year due- not give her the ability to till so. "Hoys, can you tell me anything re' itia'kalde in the life of Mus'-sr" a ked a Sabbat h-si-hoel toadier. "Ves. sir!'1 shouted one of the boys; -he broke all the commandments at once." ,lohn IJ. Ad mis of Alabama, a wid (over with twenty-one children, has gone to Texii . to marry M rs. .lacl-.son, a willow w ith nineteen children. They will make a spanking team. A young man urged, as one of tho reasons why a girl should marry him, that he had a collection of over 400 different kinds of wood. She said if it was kindling wood she'd tlrnk of it. They were standing al the front giite. "Won't you come in the parlor and sil a little while, (ieorgie dear?" "N-no, I guess not," replied Oeorge, hesitatingly. "1 wish you would," the girl went on; "it's awfully lonesome. Mother has gt-ne out and father is up 'tairs groaning with rheumatism in the legs." -Hot h legs?" asked George. "Vis, bol li legs." -Then I'll come in." llesietTCil by a drizzly. Speaking about bears and their hab its, Mr. Ben. Strickland, of the Upper Yellowstone, said to mo one day while wo were at his house; "Do you see that cabin?" pointing to a log hut op posite, and across the river, in a ravine near the foot of the mountains. I re plied that 1 did. "Well," said he, "one day in 1st!- 1 was standing on the up per side of that cabin looking about carefully, as we hail to bo very cau tious on account of the Indians. Four of us had been making that place our headquarters for some time, but my three companions had gone off on a hunt, and 1 Wits lelt alone to look af. ter things. While standing there I heard quite a rustling noise in the bushes above me, and then the heavy tread of some animal, which I suppos" ed to be elk. Not having time to get my gun, I stood and waited. In a mo ment more out came a monster griz 7ly from behind the bushes on the oj posite side of the ravine, and the in stant he saw nie be rose on bis hind legs, about twenty feet distant, mak ing a tremendous jump, and if Iliad not dodged out of his way ho would have completely scalped ine with hit powerful claws. Before he could gather himself up to come again, 1 had tun inside the- house and closed the door. lie now ran around the house several times, trying to get in, and fl nally discovering tho window or port hole, which was a square opening about 1 wo feel w ide, ho thrust in his head, almost completely filling the opening. By this time I had my gan ready, and tho moment his head was fully inside 1 fired, killing him instant ly. Ho v.-as a monster as large an an ox and bis skin was quite large enough to cover the roof of the cabin. I have killed a great many bears grizzlies and all: in fart, I have killed as many as twenty-live in one season, but I never came across one of the an imals as large as that one. VUmnnn li Ennuirtr.

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