North Carolina Newspapers

l)e l)atl)nm fWcorb. I J. A. LONDON, EDITOR AND PROPIHETOK. HATES TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION, ADVERTISING One iqua-e, one lnsertion One square, two insertion One square, one month 1.84 $1.50 PER TEAR Strictly In Advance. VOL. XIV. PITTSBORO', CHATHAM CO., N. 0., OCTOBER 2!, 1891, NO. J). For larger advertisemente liberal con racts will be made. 0,rar mm Telling the Bees. Out of the hotiso where the slumberrr 1T Grandfather came one summer day, Ami under the pleasant orchard trees Ho spake this wise to the slumbering bees : "The clover bloom Hint kissed lier fo-t And t tin pusie heil where i-lic used to I'Iny Have honey store, but none so sweet As ere our little one went away. 0 bees, sing soft, and bees sing low, Kor .he is gone w ho lov,'d you so!'' A wonder fell on the listening liees I'ndcr those pleasant orchard trees, And in their toll tint summer d:iy 1'vcr their murmuring seemed to siy : 'Child, O child, the grass is cool And the posies are. waking to hear the SOIlg (f I lie bird Hint sings by the sliadwl pool, Waiting for one that tarriclh long!" 'Twas so they culled to the little one then, A if to rail her buck again. t) gentle lues, I have come to say That grandfather fell as!eep today. And we know by the Miiile on grandfather's fac ile lias found Ms dear one's hiding plnee. Sn bfes. slug soft, and lues, sing l"v, A" (ihi the honey fields you sweep; To the. trees abloom anil the flowers aMow Sing of grandfather fast asleep. A ml ever l ncalli these orchard trees I'iml cheer and shelter, gentle liecs. -r'ligcnc Field in I'liicngii Jfewf. ALDA. ' -ver was so flahbergatilcd in my lif-i ' said Miss Milium Mills. So what?'' ttcfieil t!ie deacon. Miss Milium laughed. "Yes, I know,' said slip, "I ilon't s'pnse ymt can linl the word in t lie dictionary. It it it expresses just ex. tictly my iiK'ntiin'. I lit puzzled driv In my wit's etui." The deacon laid dow n the whetstone wherewith ho was sharpening his scythe blade. "Wlmt about, Mitiain?" said lie. 'About A iila. There's Iter name, to begin with!'' "It is sort of a queer name," ad mitted the deacon, smiling. lie was not a young man. hul when lie smiled bis wh le rugged fa- o lighted lip, Ilk1' a beam of snnshiuo on a rough rock, and his daik-gray eyes sparkle '. Opposite him flood Mi-s Miriam, tall and lean, like a beau-pole, lUcsscd in lilac calico, and topped t If with n ktioh o' sandy hair. She was fully ten jcar older than tlie deacon, and by virtue of those tell years ruled him as an' itidu'gcut inolhcr rules a little hoy, H it I e iuM gel along with that," mid Miriapi. She d du't name her self, an' I don't s'po-e site's to blame for the outlaiidishuoss of the thing, litlt 1 cai'. do notliin' Willi h 'l. 'l'liat's why I'm flabbergasted!" 'Yon picked her mit yourself, didn't y.in, at the ll-ime for Homeless 'Of coulsa I did. Hut she don't 'pear lfku Ihe same girl now that she did then. She was a little downcast thing, sis pule as a sheet, and quivci ing all over, if you d'd but look nt her. an' 'twas all yon could do to get Yes' an' 'No' out of her. Ittit now " "Well, ain't she quiet onotlyli now ?" Quiet! I heerd the greatest scr-i-chin' yesterda;-, an' I ran to the leii-niTo niedder, m.ikiu' suro the black bull had broke loose, an' there was Alda on the very tiptop of Mal leoli Hock, with her hands clasped over her head, holierin'. ' 'Mercy me!' says I, -what's tho in titer?' 'Nolhin',' says she, lookiu' sheep ish. ' Hut the sun shone an' the birds was whistliu', an' I frit ju-t like singin'. Mother uvd to sing,' says she. " Where?' says I. !.! the stage,' says (die. ' 'An otnnib'iH siege?' says 1. " 'No,' says she; 'where the people anil the footlights are. Hut mother died o' ronsuinplhin,' says she. "And last week I went out to the barn to git some eggs, and there she was etiricd up in the haymow, rcadin'. "Alda, says I, 'why ain't yon to. work? I set yon to wcediu' them young beets. 'I did weed 'eni says she, Mill I was li ed; ami I'm goin' back to work when I'm rested.' 'Look here,' says I, 'this won't do I Yott can't conn! and go as yon choose. You're my girl now, ami you've got to do as I say.' "And she never answered a word, b it just threw down the book and fashed out like a streak o' lightiiiti. Ami there in tho barn chamber, when 1 went into it, was tho biggest lot o' (Wins! She had partitioned it ofl with the h use blankets, and (hero was (ho wooden settee in one, and a lot o' posies ii: no handlol pitcher in an. other, r.ud a lot of old picture-papers 111 another. "Alda!' says I, eallin' out of the window, -what's all Ihi-?' 'Is home, su s she. 'FiddloiticlF.it' says I. 'Como and clear it all right out. I want (his room to store tilings in.' "Ami then she began to cry. " 'I never had a homo before),' says she. 'Can't I keep this one?'" "Poor child!'' said the deacon, feel ing the edgo of his scythe to see if it was sharp enough. "It was 'most a pity to disturb llu place, wau't it?'' 'Child!'' echoed MUs Miriu.-n. Why, she's sixteen old enough not to want a play-place like a baby." Tho deacon was silent. How could he make his practical, level-headed Bister comprehend tho sentiment of (he thing? Sho's a pretty g'Od worker, ain't she?" said he. "Yes by fits and starts. P.ttt you ran' t never depend on her. 1 tell you, William, that p!ay-aetin' blood's in her, and there's no gettin' it out. Sho dances and sings and flies around like all possessed as long as she feels like il, and then she seems to think that 'heiti' tired' is a sufficient exctue for anything. I nsked her t'ilher ilay why she was so different now from what I noticed at the Home, tin I says she, 'Oil, I was struck dumb for fear you wouldn't lake me! I was so tired of that place! And if you hadn't look Hie, I should have mi away.' ' 'Alda,' says I, 'you mustn't talk so.' "'Well, I should,' savs she." "Poor little girl!" said Mr. Millis. "There sho comes now, with hor apron full o' wild red plums!" said Miss Miriam, with a start. "And I left her washiu' down by the brook. Why can't she stick to her work?" Tor Miss Mills, like many another good housekeeper, had made an out door laundry in the mi miner time in n shady nook by the brook, whero u huge kettle boiled under n gipsv crotch and Ihe water supply bubb'ed past over a bed of stones. Aid i Black came slowly up the path. She was aubitrii-haired, with one of those radiant complexions that ate slightly nnivcd by freckles, and red. dish haze I eyes full of weird lights a straiig.slookiiig girl, ye.', singularly attractive. "See whit I found in the wood,'4 she said composedly. Miss Miriam p.ttshe 1 aside her trophic with such abruptness that the red plums ll'w this way and that. "I don't care what you found," said she. "What business had you in the woods?" Have you liaish id tin; washing?'' "I couldn't," shivered Alda. "It made my arms ache so. I never washed before." "Then it's high time you learned," said Miss Miriam, "(io back to your (uhs, ami don't let me see your face again till the wash is all done. It's not a heavy one, and I've told you just how to do il." Alda' cotintenanco fell. "Am I to work all the time?" said she passionately. 'That's what wo're put into this world for." said Miss Mills, didao i cally. '1 don't like (o work," pleaded Alda. "Not all (he lime, I mean." It don't matter what you like or what you din't like," said Miss Miriam, sternly, "(io back and finish that washing nt onee!" Alda looked at her mistress with slant red lights n those wonderful hazel eyes of hers. For a second it seemed as if downright rebellion were impending The deacon, still polishing (he glit tering scythe blade, awaited the cli max, not without interest. Hut finally the stirl turned around ii n I went back to the shady spot wliere lh' kettles boiled and the water went singing by. And there, as nfterward transpired, she sat, reading mi old story paper, and eating late blackberries, until the horn blew for dinner. "I was tired,'' she said indifferently. "I eould'nl work any more." Miss Miriam's slender thread of patience gave way, at this last trans gression. "William," said she toiler brother, "I've made up my mind tit last. Aunt Poreas Keep wants a 'help' up in tho Hlack Woods. Aunt Dorcas is a wo man who won't stand no nonsense. Sho was matron in th-j penitentiary for ten years. If there's any work in Alda, Aunt Koreas Keep 'II gel it out of her. I'll send Alda there instead o' going myself, this harvest time!'' "Ain't it a pretty rough place to sond the child?" asked Ie.icon Mills, dubiously. "It's just the sort of plnco she needs!" retorted his sister. "I wish you'd harness up and tako her over right away. I must get rid of Alda somehow.'' Hut tho house seemed strangely lonesome when Alda Black was gone. Tho sweet, piercing voice, caroling out the refrain of old ballads, tho mer ry laugh, the glancing to and fro of tho shining icd-brown head, tho masses of wild-flowers which tho girl was wont to put everywhere, were missed beyond all Miriam Mills' cal culation. Still she scorned to com. plain. Hut one April day the deacon eamo in and found her on the calico cush ioned settee, with a while, drawn face. "It's that old rheumatic pain again, William," said she. "I I guess you'd better go arter Alda again. I need some one to help me, and 1 somehow think Alda would suit inc. Aunt Dorcas will spare her, I know." "Miriam," said tho deacon, soberly, "I wasn't meaniii' to tell you, but Alda ain't over in tho Pluck 'Woods any inoro. Aunt Dorcas Keep sho worked tho girl p etty hard, and Alda ran away." "Han away! Oh, I hopo she ain't MI into no bad hands'." gaspeel Miss Miriam. "She went to tho pastor's hottso. The pastor's wife took her in, and sho writ to me Alda wanted her to write that she'd inako a good home for tho child. Thoy were educatiu' her up, and trainin' that sweet voice of hers for (he choir, odd times, when sho wasn't workin' about the house. Anil I've heerd tell sho was engaged to tho organist, a likely young teller that owned a good farm there." Miss Miriam uttered a groan. "Then," said she, "alio won't roine!'' "We might try," said the deacon. And he went fer Neighbor Dalley's wife to slay with Miriam whilo ho hitched up the horse and drove lo Put ney Parsonage. Alda ran joyously out to meet him. How she had changed! How (be good pastures bail (rained and civilized her.' To the deacon, who bad not seen a woman under sixty, except on I Sundays, all winter long, her beamy seemed fairly dazzling. Yes, sho I would go to lake care of Miss Miriam. J Of course she would go! Wasn't it Miss Miriam (hat first released her , from the bondage of the uiihomelikc i "Hoinc?" Did Miss Miriam really want to see her? Oh, if Miss Miriam only knew how she, Alda, had longed to see the farm again and the was!.- , place by the brook and the Halloon lb.ck! Yes, of course she would go! And Ceorge A. lee. ihe young organist, himself helped carry her trunk out to the deacon's wagon. Hut not until they were well out I upon the road did Ald.t look up into the ilcaeon's face wi;h brimming eyes, : and say: "Oil, 1 have been so homesick so ', deadly homesick to see Miss Miriam again and you !" i "Me!" repealed the deacon; nnel every drop in his veins sectneet turned to little tingling prickles. "Me, Alda?" Miss Miriam received Alda with open arms. j "("did,"' said she, "I never knew how much I should miss yott. After . this you must never go and leave mo ; any more--unles ;," checking herself abruptly, "it is true about Mr. Atlee. Are you really engaged, Alda?" Alda colored rosy-reel. "Oil, Miss Miriam, 1 am married!'' she confessed. 'Married! Oh, Alda!" groanod .Miss Mills. "Then you never can stay he-re " "Yes, she can, too!" broko in tho deacon, his enuutcuauco all one broad I beam. ''It's mo that she's married to. j It come to me all of a sudden on the way home that I loved the- girl, that 1 couldn't noways do without her. And J she said she loved me " ! "Yea, I did!" broke out Alda, with shining eyes, j "And we jest slopped nt the Moth. ' enlist minister's and got married. So Alda will stay ami nurse you after all." j "And she's welcome as (lowers in i May?" said tho spinster, after a mo- ! ine'iit of bewilderment. "Hut I do j declare, I never thought o' that way out of it!" Saturday Night. uiti Delicate. ' Mrs. ('abb (hostess) Yrrr little son docs not appear to havo much ap petite. Mrs. (iadd No, he's quite delicate. Mrs. Ciabb Can't you think of any thing yon would like, my little ijiniif Litlle Man No, 'in. You see, mom made me eat a hull lot before we start ed, so I wouldn't make a pig of my self. fiood News. Couldn't See. "Why don't you look and seo whero you arc going?" said the needle to the piu. "How cn I, whou 1 haven't nn eye in my head?" was tho pin's meek re. ply. CHILDREN'S COLUMN. IIAI10I.II AND THE MOON. Hsrold, our darling 2-year-old, Awaking suddenly lust niglit, Was very restless till Inaiiiini Showed him the heavens sparkling bright Then, looking straight up nt the moon, lie gave a merry little shout An-' said, 'Oh, what n g'ute bu lnmp An" me's a-goia' to blow it out." His blue eyes shining and his m iuth Looking like rosebud red in dime, Hi' blew and Mew and lo! a cloud That moment parsing, 1 i I the moon. "Me did il," cried liess he turned Ami thing his dimpled arms about Jfis mother' neck. "Me said me would. i!e blowed so hard me binned it out." Detroit Free Irs. TIIK I.K.rtKK M. It is a curious fact that the sound of the letter M is, in almost nil the known languages, to bo found in tho word which stands for mother and muse. Perhaps this comes from tho fact that it represents a sound existing in nearly every spoken speech, and has the same pronunciation in them all; and being exceedingly easy to utter, almost speaking itself, as it were, it is ono of the first sounds that children make, and naturally becomes mamma. Tin-: k m; ok roitN. A farmer went into his field with his little sou to see whether tho corn would soon be ripe. "I-'ather, how is it," said Ihe hoy, that some stalks beud so low and oth ers hold their heads so high?" Tho father plucked oil' two cars and said: "See, this car which bent modestly if full of the finest corn, but that which stretehod upward proudly is quite barren and empty." "To carry one's head very high, Is often the sign of vanity." A III.N TAKO I'AltK IM A KITTI'.V. The little 8-year-old son of Harry Alexander has a hen at his home in New Heme that is taking care of a young kit ton in the place of a brood of chickens, mi 1 it is apparently as f ind and proud of it as though it were n young chick. Tho boy found Kiddie silling on her nest in the barn, and putting his hand beneath her to seo wh.tsho was hovering wa? surprised to ft ml the kitten. The foster molhor was very indignant and vexed wheu her little charge was temporarily re moved, and picked viciously nt tho boy's hand when he removed it. It was returned to (he ne-t. It was sup posed some cat had taken her young ofT-pring to Ihe nest for safety, and the female gallus doinesticus insisted on taking it in charge. Thero is no accounting for the stiaugc freak taken now and then by some animals iu adopting and earing for the young of some other species. Xew Orleans Picaviine. SWM.I.OWS 'Mi l ItoWS. Among the courageous small birds may be counted the family of swal lows. The writer his often seen barn swallows fly downward and peck at the cat and dog, and more than once a sharp twitter, a whir of wings and a peck on the hat his reminded her, w hen standing iu the barn door, that she was intruding on Ihe swallows' precincts. About a half-mile from the house U a high hank which is the homo of a colony of bank swallows, The earth for some distance is thickly perfo rated with the roundish holes lending into their nests. Not far from this bank a quantity of corn was one day scattered by acci dent upon the ground. The crows were quick (o elicivcr what had hap. pe-iied, and swooped elown and began to devour the windfall. S-'ine of the swallows spied them at once and gave the alarm. I chanced lobe setting beneath a tree in full view of tho scene. Iu less than a minute after the crows had settled to feeding, more thau a hundred of the bank swallows had darted from their holes, and with angry twitters fell upon the intruders. The attack was a complete surpriso (o the big black fellows, and, ns if realizing Ihe futility of trying to cope with their small assailants, Ihey rose from Ihe ground in a body and took flight. The swallows pursued (hem darting, diving, striking at them, above, below and from both sides. Tho crows were routed completely and took refuge in ; a dense piece of woods a quarter of a in i lo away. Then the triumphant , swallows turned about and sailed j homeward, uttering many chirps and ; twitters of satisfaction in they flew, j For the hour or more that I re- j maiiied in the field not a crow was to i be seen near Ihe com. Th swallows j The reigning Viceroy, a Spanish noble weie masters of tho Held. Youth's " was especially objcctioimblo to Companion. n"d one day when the Kasquc. Teacher What is the capital of Cal ifornia? Freddy Fungle III glorious climate, TIIC PURSER. A Steamship Official Whose Duties are Many. Takes tho Tickets, Keeps the Log and Hunts Stowaways. Tho purser on on Atlantic liner wears ono gold stripe, on o b'.aek velvet baud. Ho Is one of the inei-t important officers of the ship, and lie ha a'.l sorts of things to do. He is in charge of the passenger depart ment and all stores, anil signs nil requisitions with I lie chief steward. He is the financial agent of the own ers aboard ship. lie collects the ! tickets from the passengers, sees that j Ihey arc all properly berthed, and ! nets as a general business manager. All mails are in his charge, and any specie on the ship in transmission is in his personal care, and whilo it is on hoard ho must not leave the ship. I Tho purser's work at sea begins . with the muster of the crew before ; the posscngcrs come abourd. After tho I mtiUer of tho crew is dismissed all j tho steerage mid second cabin passen I gers are mustered, and have to pass j tho ship's doctor and a Hoard of Trade man. After (hat the purser receives the saloon passengers and settles them in their rooms. That generally takes : tho time of the lirst day. There are always in tho busy season disputes ' about rooms and hei-t lis which ho must settle. Kverybody who wants to know 1 anything about the ship asks tho pur- 1 scr. He is expected lo run a bank for tho accommodation of the passengers ' und to decide bets iu sporting events. People who want to change their berths have t see him, and those who do not want anything come to seo him , because they don't want anything. His oflic) bell rings all the lime. K'tls for storage, cartage and such things, incurred through the oflke, are brought to him to be p lid and then disputed. All in all, his life is about as peasant as the chief steward's. The morning after leaving port he takes the steerage and second cabin ticket". The steerage passengers are ail mustered at one end of (lie ship and (he other end is carefully eearelicd. Then the tickets are taken and the passengers allowed to go to the end of the ship which has been searched, while the other end is searched. In this way nobody escapes and stow aways are caught. The fceond cabin passengers arc mustered in the saloon and their tickets taken. They are then scut on deck and (he cabin searched. The saloon passengers give the-ir tickets to the bedroom stewards, who when he has gathered all tho tickets for his section turns them over to his purser. There are several lists which the purser must make out while at sen. On west-bound passages he makes out three passenger manifests, one for t lie Stale Hoard of Immigration tend two for the custom officer. These lists give the nmiie, ago, sex, residence, nativity, and occupation of eiich pas senger, and the number of pieces c.f his baggage. Tho cargo manifest for the custom officers is a complete list of all pieces of cargo, the names of the shipper and consignee, the marks on the boxes aud u description of the j goods. All packages of freight of ! value me taken in personal charge j by the purser and h eked in specie vault'". i l'.very morning at 10 l-'J o'clock ho j goes with the doctor and chief i fficer oil an inspection of the ship. Four or five other times during Ihe dav he : lftkcs , roull(Is ,, nlwily, .' ,ast thing he does at night before turning ill is to make an inspection. There are a hundred little things for him to do, such as changing money and mak ing the Associated Press abstract of the log. He is the only one author- j ized lo send let'ers and telegrams ! ashore by the pilot at Sandy Hook er at (.Jticcustowu. lie keeps the crew list i.inl the articles and makes up the official log of the ship, in which is kept the record of all occurrences of interest and of till offences by Ihe crew. This is done for the Hoard of Trade, so that when the men are paid otl' in Liverpool by the purser, for every fine or deduction from their wages he must show the entry of the occurrence of the oft'encc iu his official log book. New York Sim. How a Spanish Nobleman Won a Hazardous Wager. A wealthy gentleman of Hisque descent lived in iho city of Mexico. He was a good ileal of a madcap and noted for his daring eccentricities. gentleman was among somo lively and congenial fi lends, talk fell on the law which provided that no one other than tlit VaMroy might drive about with spotted horses. This was a privilege) which the Viceroys were very zealous in maintaining. As a result of the discussion the Hasque gentleman, something of a "calavera," as they say in Spanish a wild fellow as we would put it wagered with n Mexican marquis that he would himself hitch four spotted horses into his coach, and drive through the principal streets of Mexico. Twen ty thousand dollars was the amount of the wagor. Iu a few days a handsome coach, with four spotted horses, was driven up the main avenue of the city past the; present Iturbide hotel to the very gates of tho viceregal palace. The coach was driven several times up mid down in front of the palace, while sentries presented armn, thinking it to be the viceregal coach. Some one ran up stairs and informed the Viceroy himself of the presence in tho street of a coach with spotted horses, ond out went Ihe pompous Spanish vice king to a balcony lo see, with his own eyes, tho dctiauco of his privilege and infraction of tho law. The Hasquo gentleman leaned out of the window, suluted the Viceroy most graciously, nml then ordered the I'oachmau to enter tiie main courtyard of the palace. On reaching the very heart of Ihe viceregal authority the Hasquo alighted, passed gravely up the staircase to tho viceregal apart, merits, and, to the astonished and dazed functionary, said : "Knowing how fond you were of horses, I havo come to present you with a coach and four as an expression of my sincere admiration !" Tho Viceroy, perforce, had to ac cept tho handsome gift, and could eay notlrng. The coach and horses cost SlluflO, and the clever Hasquo pocketed I?I7, 000 profit when the wager was set tled. Koston Herald. Fibre From Palmetto Leaves. Near Jacksonville, l'la., a company has commenced tho business of con verting tho leaves of the common scrub palmetto into a fibre fit for com. mcrcial purposes. The process of transformation is not at all compli cated. The work is done by a machine so simple iu construction that a hny can manipulate it. The leaves of (he palmetto are placed between washers aud are carried hy them into a box furnished with twj revolving cylin ders, each having (colli that tear the leaves lengthwise into long strips. This process finally divests (hem of (he soft vegetable parts which enter into their composition, nothing re maining but the tough tibrc. This is then forced down a chute lo a lower lloor, where It is dried und packed in bales ready for shipment. Although the industry is yet in its in fancy, many uses have been already found for the fibre, the principal demand at the present time being for stuffing mat tresses and upholstered furniture. It costs only about one. fourth as much us moss. Carpet and i pholstery Trade Keview. Horse Superstitions in Arabia. The horse is involved in the most ancient superstitions of the people of Arabia. They believed him to he en dowed with a nature superior, not in degree only, hut in kind, to that of all other animals, ami to havo been framed by the Almighty with a special regard to the convenience of man. One of their oldest proverbs (ells tiiein that the horse is the most eminent of dumb brutes, and that the most meri torious ot domestic action . is (hat (if feeding him. Mohamet himself incul cated a lesson of kindness to the horse when he said: "As many grains of barley as arc contained in the food we give a horse, so many indulgences do we daily gain by giving it." The be lief is widespread iu Hie Fast that all pure Arabian horses are descended from Mohamet's five favorite mares, upon one of hich the prophet fled from Mecca to Medina. St. Louis Republic. A Fun-I.nv ing Seal. The mother seal at the V. o cot rather guy last Sunday afterno-n while a big crowd of ladies, gentle men and children w as standing around eagerly watching the baby seal. The mother seal would watch and seo vt here the crowd was thickest, slide quietly under the water, come up close as possible to whero tho crowd was, and (hen, with seemingly pmc devlilry, jump up audsplash ti c water in such a way ns to cover and wet every one within twenty feet. And it kept this sort of fun up all the afternoon. No matter on which side of the tank the crowd got, the seal would make a quiet sneak under the water, aid then, quick as "lightning, show up near the crowd and get in its funny business. -Cincinnati Enquirer. What is Love? J.ove Is joy, snd love is sorrow j Love is sweet and bitter, too; Love Isold as all creation, Ye, is love forever new. J.ove is deep, and love Is cruel; Love is tender, love L kind ; Love will come not at your bidding, Yet no place but love w ill rind. J.ove will die unflinching for you; Love will kill as quick as hate; Ljvc will brave the wrath of thunder, Yet will weep if barred by fute. You that love can have my pity, You that have not loved at all, I w ill hope out of compassion, ,ove w ill soon give you a call. Llbbie '. llacr in Arkansaw Traveler. j IIFMOKOrs. j A tramp spends his life going to dinner. A new choirmaster in a church ' aught to make everything just hum. It is singular how a surgeon retains Ids popularity when he to often cuts his friends, j First dude 1 say aw where did ; you get your hair cut? Second dude ' On my head. Man Why don't you follow some trade? Tramp I did son; but I nivor caught up wid it. Mrs. Strong The greatest thing Is ! what you are! Her Pretty Niece ' Wrong, auntie;lhc great thing is, what you wear. ! "Oh, what a precious little mflney hank," exclaimed a visitor at the Jan gles us she catni icd Fro lily's birth day gift. "Yes," said Freddy, "aud there's precious little umicy in it, loo."' He "So you positively will not give me one kiss? And I had a ten dollar bet with Tom Kicklcs that you would." She "I am sorry for you, but I have a bet widi him of a box of "loves that I would not." "In Ihese idyllic days," began the new boarder, butterflies " "In deed it does," interrupted the land lady :is she snatched the butter plate, "hut you're the first one that had the consideration to speak of it." "Isn't it a wonderful lesson for man the way a canary caged for life sings and sings and tings all the time." "h-issim? 1 think it is a bad example. If a mm were as vindic tive as that he'd be executed." Chief of Police "Have you given any work to that crack detective put on by the hoard?" Captain "Ho had one job." Chief "Did ho catch 'em?" Captain "Catch 'em: Why, say, chief, that feller couldn't catch cold." Young Miishinan "Mis Clawa, beg pawdon, but weeenlly your man . liah, (lontcher know, ejuitc distwesses me. Perluip you are not awaah of it, hut you have acquiahed a chwonic habit of sti.wing at vacancy." Miss Clara "You silly boy! How can I help it without being inattentive to you?" Extraordinary Proiision of Nature. A wonderful place is Tiuajas, about thirty miles southwest of Mission Camp, Arizona. The mountains at this point have ono face of hard, smooth granite. All the walors falling on this entire basin are, by a most ex traordinary provision of nature, com , bincd with the efforts of primitive i man, made to flow through a suecc6 ; sion of nine wells or (auks, carved iu 1 the solid granite of which the inoun ; tain is composod. Those remarkable ; receptacles are placed or excavated, one above the other, the upper tanks : being approachable only by a difficult ! and circuitous route through a perfect chaos of gigantic detached bowlders, i The lower tanks are easy of access, j and are often drained of their con ( tents by men and animals traveling between Yuma and Sonora. To one standing at the foot of the mountain ; on which the upper tanks are situa- ted no indication of their existence il iifTordcd, nor does climbinc the i smooth, steep mountain side seem possible to one unacquainted with the ; way. This latter fact is not deplorn j hie, becauso ihe upper tanks have ' never been known to bo dry. Within ' two miles of these Arizoniau wonders arc certainly l.'iO or 200 graves, each marked by rows of stones laid in the ; form of a cross. These are (he rest : ing places of men, famished for : water, who bud expended Iheir last ! strength iu reaching Tiuajas. only to j find tho lower tanks dry, and, ignornnt 't of the upper ones, had lain down in ' despair to die. St. Lonis Republic. Encouraging. Firs'. Youth (at Hail way depot) Traveled far? Second Youth Not ycl, but I ex pect to before I slop. I am going West to seek my fortune. First Youth 1 jnst got back. Lend m dime, will yoji? XGootl News.