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VOL. XVII.
PlTTSBOUO', CHATHAM CO., N. C, APRIL 4, 1895.
NO. 32.
If X H
ii i 11 ii i
Throe Ships.
ThrfcO ships there Io a-sallln
Betwixt the sea and Hky ;
Anil one in Now, niiil one is Thru,
Ami one is Ity and )y.
The first little ship is a 1 for you
Its masts iiro geld, its sails nre blue,
And this Is the cargo it brings :
Joyful days with sunlight glowing.
Nights where drowns like slurs are growing.
Take then), sweet, or they'll be, going!
For they every duo have wings.
Tho second ship it is nil for ine
A-siillIng on n misty sou
Ami out across the twilight gray.
What it brought of gift mid hli-.slng
Would not slay for my erne-sing -Was
too dear for my possessing,
Ho it sails mil suits away.
Tho last ship, tilling fair ami high
l;pon tint sea, is lly mnl Hy.
() Willi !' kiml aiul gently h ow !
Not too swiftly Illusion hiiher.
When slio turns, sweet, you'll go with her
Sailing, floating, hither, thither
To what port I n ay not know.
! Iakhik r T. Ili.oiniKrr In St. NieholiiH.
A Wolfs Point Episode.
iiv Kfiinxr. THAfiiiitir n.
Ros! McChiuiihiin wits the acknowl
edged belli! nf Willi's Point. I say
"acknowledged," because nobody in
that isolated section of country, two
days' travel ii tho Missouri Kivcr liy
steamboat from S Louis, would lmve
bail tho temerity to dispute tho fact,
especially in tho presence of her
father. Wlu-n Hose was seven yours
oll, tho governor of Missouri, en
route from Jell'ersou City t" Bootivillo
uuon ouo of tlio magnificent steamers
that then navigated the swift running
waters of tho "Big Muddy," stopped
Ulion tho shore while tin' bo it wa.
"wooding tip" at tint 1 it :i I i n vr, mnl
catching tho child in his arms, kissoil
her, mill ileo'iired thai she wouhl hoii-o
d ay be tho handsomest woman in tin1
ol.l State.
So it was that when Hose was si
tocn years of ago, it 1 1 1 tho governor's
preilietion was f n -.t cnu -rging into a
reality, her father, Jin MeClutiiihun,
was wont to swear by General Jon
Kliclby, his hero, that tho girl wouhl
some day marry a m ,-mb-r of the
Legislature, or a circuit rider.
Tho people of Wolf's Point were
primitive in their ways, r nl-; in in-in-ncr
nutl speech, niul hippy in their
iguorano.'. liuleeil, the great lire light
of civilization, which now sheds its
refulgent rays over a prosperous mnl
cnlighteucil community, was nt this
tiino spluttering like n tallow ilip mnl
ojntinually threatening to go out.
Now anil then a wandering Method
ist preacher wouhl reach tho ' Point"
on his circuit it ml hold a revival. Ho
would warn the people, to free
themselves from the "hip lock" of
Satan, ami as a rule his advice, wouhl
bo kindly received, and everybody
would join the church. Hut when the
preacher departed, their religious zeal
rapidly subsided, nil fell as low as
before his arrival. Sim MoClaniihati
was always among thu first to turn
away from the beckoning ot Satan at
the yearly revival, and to "backslide"
after its close, lint as he remarked
on one occ tsioii, when he was cut off
from membership on account of drunk
enness, "l'iiey could turn him out of
the church if they ha 1 a mind to, but
they couldn't keep him from being a
Christian !"
During the summer inonlhstho resi
dents of tho "Point" would raise siilli
cient truck to Inst them through tho
winter; in the fall they hunted 'pos
sums; and in tho winter they chopped
cord wood and attended "break downs. "
In thoir estimation, pliy.-icul prowess
was tho crowning trait of character,
and every man was measured by his '
ability us a light t. Nest to lighting j
camo fiddling, and the limn who could
reel off tho "Arkansas Traveler" or '
"Chicken in the Doiig'.i Tray" oeeu- !
pied a position iu some respects even
tnoro enviable than that of tho I
"bully." Hut the mm who was both a !
fighter and a tiddler who can tell j
rightly of his fame? j
Such a man was Jim McClanalian;;
but ho had a rival iu young Hud Hon
shnw, who was closely "crowding"
him for tho championship both in
music and in pugilism. Notwithstand
ing tho fact that he had set his heart
upon a member of the legislature, or
a circuit rider, fur u son-in-law, Jim
had given it out that any man who
would best him in a rough and tumble
fight could thereby secure his consent
to marry Hose. The challenge was one
which none of the youug men of tho
neighborhood had cared to take up,
until Hose reached her sixteenth year.
Then it was that Hud Honshaw, who
had been "keeping company" with her
for several months, suddenly sprang
into prominence by knocking an x
down with his list.
Ono afternoon, when Jim whs sitting
in tho shade of his log ho'istc, Hud
ilensli:iw shuflDd into view.
"Hop" I sec you," said Jit.
" 'Pears to mo thcro ain't nothing
tho matter with yon eyesight." re
plied Hud.
"Hotter brush off your brooches
and set down," Jim suggested.
"Ain't got time," Bud answered
quickly. "Fact is, I camo over to ux
you for Hose."
"Air you a member of tho Legisla
ture, or a circuit rider?' asked Jim,
with rude but biting sarcasm.
"Wall, not thet eny ouo knows on,"
was tho angry reply. "Hut I'm tho
best man in theso diggiu's, and kin
prove it. Air ye going to face tho
music?"
"You bet," replied Jim, jumping
up.
Until men were strong and tough,
and it was nip and tuck for a few miu
utoH. Finally Hud landed iv terriblo
blow on-tho point of his adversary's
jaw, ami Jim went down. When ho
got up ho calmly shook hands with his
eompicrer, ami said, "Tho gal's
yours. "
" I hanky," briefly replied Hud, as
he hurried away.
Tho young mini's victory mndo him
the hero of tho hour at Wolf's Point,
and 11 iso readily agreed to marry him
a year later if he held the belt for
that, length of time.
Lnt .' iu the fall Jim McClniiahan rc
c ived a visit from a sister who lived
at IJooiiville, and whom ho had not
s 'en lor many years. When she was
ready to return, she insisted upon tak
ing Koso with her. "I will send her
to school," she said to h -r brother,
"an I when she returns next summer
hIio will bo a lino lady."
The fath t finally consented, and
ll ise left her home, with its rinlj but
happy memories, to enter upi u a new
life
ll.iso was naturally bright, and had
vaguely lunged for a better education
th in could bj obtained nt tho winter
school wh'c!i she hud att mi led in tho
"Point. She applied herself earnest
ly, and made rapid progress. Her
aunt kept boarders; and olio of them
Hob Curtis, a manly young fellow who
w is iu hiisiu.Hs for himself, soon fell
i'l lovo with the girl. II s lovo was
ree'proc.ited, but ltmo win unhippy,
believing that Hud would bo so en
raged if sin) "sacked" him that he
might cum! to I! Mnville and scatter
the form of her city lover over the
pavements. Fin illy she told Hub of
her four, and of tho peculiar customs
of her native place.
"Why, is that all?" said Curtis.
"Well, I hive been thinking a few
days' holid ly would tl ) mo good. I
will just drop down to Wolf's Point
and settle the matter."
Two days later, as Jim McChinahaii
ami Il uishaw were grinding a scythe
tihulo under a tree in tho former's
front yard, a stranger jumped over
the low rail foneo and walked rapidly
toward them.
"Am I addressing Mr. McClana
lian?" ho said politely to tho older of
the two men.
"You air if the court knows her
self, and she thinks she do," replied
J"; in.
"Thanks," said tho stranger curtly.
"My name is Curtis, Robert Curtis,
Mr. MeClanahan, and I am a resident
of Hoonville. I met your daughter
there some months ago, and I recently
asked her to bo my wife. She told
mo of a peculiar cust m that prevailed
among your people, and that a Mr.
H nshiiw hud gained tho promise of
her haul in marriage by whipping
v.mi. I am here now for tho purpose
of in "cting Mr. Heiishuw. I am in a
hurry, and if you will tell nn where
he can bo found I will appreciate your
kin lncm."
"1 ni't haftor be found," Hud sav
agely interposed, instantly compre
hending tho situation. "I'm him.
Look out tor me! I'm coming!"
And he rushed at. Curtis.
The 1 liter quickly stepped to ouo
side, and planted his clinched right on
the other's ear. The blow did not fell
voting HeiiKhaw, but raised hin anger
to the highest pitch.
"Prat you," ho said, "I'll showyou
what "
Hut he never finished the sentence.
Curtis' fist landed on his j iw, and the
bully went down. When ho got up,
his antagonist upset him again, and
repeated tho performance several
times. At length Henshaw failed to
rise, and lay senseless. Curtis stood
by with folded arms
Iu a miniito or two Bud recovered
consciousness, and w.hen ho learned
that he hadn't even touched Curtis
during tho tight, he darted out into
th i brush and was soon lost to view.
"Well, that gits mo, as tho coon
8 iid w hen he stepped into tho trap,"
ejaculated Jim MeClanahan. "llow'd
y on do it?"
"Oh, it was easy," replied Curtis,
laughing. "Ho depended on brute
strength, whilo I relied on hcience.
Hv tho nnv, have you a fid Tl ab.ui
tho placo? I always like to play some
thing after a fight."
Tho fiddlo was brought, and Curtis
played as ho had never done before.
When ho concluded, thoro wero teurl
in Jim's eyes ns ho grasped Hob by
the hand and said, "Tho gal is yours,
an' I'm just as happy as or but say,
you ain't a furrincr, are you?"
"I should say not," replied Curtis.
"My father was with Joo Shelby for
four "
"Don't say another word," con
tinued his father-in-law elect, "or I'll
bust with joy ! How I wish Hoso was
here "
"Well, here I am," mid some one;
and, looking around, Jim saw his
daughter running from tho house.
"Hob mnl I camo down together,"
sho said, "and I slipped into tho
houso from the other sido while ho
was talking to yon and Hud."
Jim MeC'laiiahau is now nn old lnnu,
and whilo ho still reveres tho memory
of General Joo Shelby, ho doesn't
swear by him any more. Ho swears
by his son-in-hiw, Hob Curtis.
Munsoy.
Politeness of The Mexicans.
"For manifesting a grave and im
portiibublo c nirtesy iu every circum
stance of life give mo tho Mexican
people," said a civil engineer who lived
long in tho S iuthwest. "Hero is a
case in point. A dozen years ago I was
visiting Hermosillo, tho capital of So.
nira,niid, falling iu with an old engi
neering comrade one afternoon, wo
drank not a littlo tequila. Tequila or
niesca', perhaps you know is a clear
white liquor distilled from the cen
tury plant, and possessing much of
th j (astound potency of Irish whiskey.
There was a circus in town, and in the
evening Johnson nml I went up tho
street to see it. Tho performance did
not greatly interest us as wo left tho
show before it was half through and
started down tho street on our way to
tho hotel. The tequila wo had drunk
was still animating us .and inspiring a
spirit of advaitture. As wo camo oppo
site the preat housj of Dr. Molit 'verde,
one of the grandees of S mora, wo saw
perched on a stone post at the entrance
of the courtyard a white turkey, and
here we stopped and full to guessing
tho weight of the bird. "At lust to
settle our dilVerenco of opinion wo
started in to catch the turkey. It run
into tho courtyard and wo followed.
Upon the veriiuda at ono side of tho
courtyard tho huuschoM were sitting
enjoying the evening coolness. At our
uueeremouius advent they raised not
a word of protest but only laughed
as tho turkey ran wildly around with
with Johnson and mo iu pursuit. After
a long chase wo caught tho bird and
approaching the group on the veranda
tried to inform that we should like u
pair of scales to weigli it with. Neither
Johnson nor I had an idea what tho
Spanish word for scales was, and so wo
indicated the best way wo could by
signs what we wanted. They showed
much interest in tho endeavor to catch
our meaning, and at Inst we made our
selves understood.
"Si, Kcnor.'said tho head of the house
with perfect bonhomie, and calling a
yervaut, gave him somo directions in
Spanish. Tho servant ilepuited and
presently camo b.ick with a pair of
scales which wero placed at our dispo
sal. We weighed tho turkey, set tho
bird at liberty, returning scales with
thanks, and declining tho courteous
invit ition of tho ho.ipitablo hidilgo
that we ahould sit down and have a
glass of wine, wo lifted our lints and
went on our way.
"Fancy two strangers invading pri
vuto premises and going through such
a ma. leap perforniauo anywhere else
you have ever heard of, and then toll
mo the Mexicans arc. not tho politest
people iu tho world. " New York Sun.
A I'atient ('.iiintci'fciter.
Fvery now and tit mi the Secret Ser
vice officials of the treasury receives
from somu distant bunk a government
note of a large denomination, made
with a pr-n by n:i artist of infinite pa
tience and skill. Sometimes it is a
greenback of fl.O!):), sometimes a na
tional bunk note of .-.)l), and during
the last few weeks two $100 treasury
notes have come iu all bearing evi
dence of having been miiilo by tho
same hand, and so perfect iu every de
tail that the defeets c:m bo detected
only by the two of a microscope. Be
tween $7,0i 1 and $H,00;) of the results
of this artist's work h is been discov
ered, but not th- slighte.-t clue to tho
place of tho mm from whom they
come. Some of the notes aro well
worn and look us if they hud been iu
circulation a lo:i ; time; some have
been deteete 1 iu b indies of money
sent in for redemption, and "the pen,
aud-iuk iii:m," as they cull him at tho
treasury, undoubtedly makei his li
ing by that sort of work Washington
Letter.
UAINT AM) (THIOL'S.
The black ostrich stands seven feet
high.
The Kspiucll i farm in Texas contains
over one million five thousand acres.
Tho empire founded by Napoleon
comprised at its greatest extent about
7000,0(10 square miles.
Neibuhr tho historian, road with
ease twenty ditierent languages, an!
could converse iu tea or twelve.
New Orleans has a vestibuld train 1 1
Sin Francisco that covers tho distune )
in less than seveuty-eigh: hours.
Tho inhabitants of Arran, where
the miiideii-huir fern grows plentifully,
employ it as a substitute for tea.
Tho church collection was onco
taken iu a bag at the end of a polo
with a bell attach-d to arouse the
sleepers.
(ins 'feeler of Kirwin, Mo-, fell ofi a
iud-mill tower and saved his life by
falling on his two porkers. It killed
the lngs.
Siberian peasants clean, stretch and
dry the skin of tho turbot for leather
bags and as a substitute for glass win
dow panes.
October 2Sth, IVT'.l, Monsieur Jacob
took hisseat tisa member of the French
Assembly, at tho ago of ouo hundred
and twenty.
A man iu Thomaston, Me., has a
hobby of collecting e tllen lars, aud ho
has somo from China, Japan, Cuba
and Alaska.
Pisciculture is by no means a new
art. It lnu been practiooh for ages by
the Chines.! and tiio Egyptians knew i
something of it.
Mrs. Dold, of Sollersburg, Iml,
imagined sho heard burglars in tho
house, aud was so frightened sho died
throe hours later.
In a tree cut down on flu Faulconor
plao iu Spottsylvania, Va. , threj pis
tol bulls and a carbine ball were found
embedded iu the heart.
Jiiiues Chandler, of Lyon (!unty,
Kentucky, who is seventy-nine years
old has forty-seven grand children and
thirty-eight great-gr.md children.
Tho favorite Japanese vegetable is
th- "I) likon," a huge radish. Rice
would scarcely bo termed a vegt t ible,
in it takes tho place of wheat lloui
with us.
I'util the time of llcnory 111. there
was uo such thing us professional
trainers of horses, an d early Kings
thought nothing of becoming their
own jockeys.
Above tho doorway of tho Gankiro
music hall in Yukohoma Japan, years
ago was printed in English : "For tho
amusment of foreigners. No dogs or
Chinamen admitted."
The standard Chinese work on coin
ago is in twentv volumes, and tho
Chinese money itself is not less bulky,
as a string of cash weighing five pounds
is worth less than twciitv-tivo cents.
Cuban Possibilities.
The sugar-production of Cuba, en
ormous as it now is, o:m bo increased
tenfold. And by the aid of modern
improvements iu the method of manu
facture sugar cau be. produced s i
cheaply there that no other country iu
tho world cm fairly compote with it.
Only a tithe of tho lun Is adapted to
sugar is now under cultivation. Coft'oo
growiug, which was once in tho front
rank of its industries. Inn now fnlh u
to a matter of small importance. With
cipital, aud confidence iu the honesty
and good will of the government, this
industry could again be put upon a
profitable footing. S i near as it is to
us, and with the rapid improvement
in means of transportation, it is tho
natural winter garden for tho United
States. There is no question about
tho "frost-line," that bugbear to the
fruit and vegotuble growers in our own
South, and with cheap lands and
cheap labor, and tho encouragement
that steiiniboat-line.i aro now giving,
we could be supplied unfailingly with
tropical products from this source.
Bananas, cocoanuts, oranges, lemons,
pineapples, would all pay well for
careful and systematic cultivation.
Lippiueott.
Tlio Cliaucp That Savetl Them.
As a Kuox county man and his wife
were passing tho sehoolhouso n flying
snowball hit tho wife of his bosom.
H ! was enraged an I justly and turn
ing to the schoolboys shaking his list
iu anger he cried :
"It's lucky for you, you young
rascals tha you didn't hit me!"
Lewiston, (Me.,) Journal.
Travers City, Mich., claims the
champion record for her citizens as
t ixpiiyer1. Sine.' the village was organ
ized, iu ltSI, there has tiev.-r been
single piece of property advertisil
for tuxes.
MINING CHDAR LOGS
A Unique Industry in New Jersey-Swamps.
Trees Burled for Centuries Found
in Fine Condition.
The mining of ced is has been an in
dustry in the swamps near Dennisville,
N. J., for three quarters of a century.
It is the most unique mining in tho
world.
When one speuks of mining cedar
the impression usually is that petri
fied cedar is meant. It is nothing of
the sort. Ages and ages ago a forest
of cedar trees waved its multitudinous
branches in the breezes about Capo
May. They were superb monurchs of
of the forest, mmy of them, and they
met their death in some violent man
ner. They fell prostrate, peril ips
through tho agency of sumo terrific
storm, and perhaps through some
tremendous earthquake.
Possibly the tumult of the in-rushing
waves was s '.illicit-lit to overturn the
gigantic trees by tho force of the
waves mid by the undermining of their
roots, but they liiny have been done to
deuthin a more gradual wuy by the de
struction of their life at the roots by
salt water. Down they all went, how
ever, into the soft muck in which their
roots wero imbedded, sinking deeper
by reason of their weight, until the
mold of centuries of leaves closed
over them.
The resurrection time began away
back in the year ISl'J, when some
prosaic South Jeiscyiniin, delving tho
earth, hit up. in a cedar log and
hauled it out to tho li-ht of day. To
tho surprise of every one it was found
to be in a tine state ot preservation.
It hud been suec-ssfully protected
from decay ly thu peculiar qualities
of tho soil about, one of tho strange
accidents of nature which set scien
tists agape every now and then. It
did not tako long for the natives to
reason that there might be more logs
of the siiine sort iu the vicinity. So
they went about plunging an iron
rod into the soil. When the iron rod
struck something hard, and after they
had satisfied themselves that the sub
stance was wood mid not stone, they
attacked tho earth w ith their shovels
and soon had another laid bare. Prac
tically the same process is pursued to
this day, and thousands of feet of
excellent timber have been procured
s nco the mining of cedar began.
The trees often lie over one another,
and sometimes iu heaps, as the dead
men lay on somo of the battlefields of
the Civil War. Tho miner usually
has littlo trouble in "striking wood."
Ono or two little jabs into the soft
sml oftentimes suffices to locate a log.
When the prod strikes tho log the
miner chips oft a piece with the sharp
points of the tool, which brings the
splinters to tho surface when drawn
out of the muck.
By the appearance of this chip the
experienced miner can at once tell
whether the log is sound or rotten.
If it is sound, ho at once falls to work
to prod up and down its length until
he has determined how Ion it is.
This ascertained, he goes at the min
ing. He works a siw similar to those
ns.'d in cutting ic, down into the
earth, severs tho tree near the roots,
and also at the top. The log is then
ready to bo raised. A ditch is dug
down to the log, the trunk is loosened
by the cant hooks, and it rises with
tho water to the surface of the ditch.
A very odd thing happens to the logs
when they rise to the surface they
invariably turn bottom side up in the
water. 'To haul the log off to the mill
is then a very simple matter.
The venerable trees are w hite cedar,
and as the saw outs its wuy into them
an odor many tunes intensified over
that of the red cedar of today rises to
tho nostrils. In color tho wood is of
delicate llosh tint. Strange as it may
seem, not a single log, it is said, has
ever been found thit was waterlogged.
The earthen shield about them perfect
ly protects them from the dampness i.
the swamp, in the very midst of which
they are. So far there seems to be no
means of telling how d ep down into
the earth this cedar mine goes. Al
though the mine has been worked for
eighty-odd years, the first layer hits
not yet been entirely removed. That
there are more beneath the first layer
is certain.
The old logs make an excellent
building material, and there are tubs,
pails, casks and even shingles in South
Jersey which wero mado from the
wood seventy years ago in a lino state
of preservation. What it is iu the
soil about the logs which has preserved
theiti so perfectly no one seems to
know. Globe-Democrat.
New York has the greatest number
of inhabited dwellings, 8'J3. "!).
Hoi.' Ants Put I p Preserves.
No matter how orderly and syste
matic the housekeeper, when pro
serves aro to bo made great excite
ment prevails iu tho kitchen. There
is a scouring of brass kettles, a wash
ing of bowles, and all hands aro set to
work peeling tho fruit, or taking out
the stones if it has stones with a
quill, weighing, and stirring, and
skimming the pot, and finally dipping
the steaming luscious fruit out tender
ly, placing it in the jar.lubelilig these,
and carrying them into a dark cup
board, Tho tiny, insignificant ant, to whom
Solomon referred us to learn wisdom,
makes no such ado over her winter
stores.
She is very much cleverer than a
human being, for she simply walks
quietly into tho granary, touches the
great heaps of seeds aud grains, that
the diligent workers have put away,
with their quivering antennae, and
the deed is accomplished. What this
queer little creature has done is this:
she has put a drop of formic aci I. as
it is culled, upon each of the grains,
which arrests t he process of germina
tion, ii ii -1 consequently th- fool in
these underground pantries may keep
for years without sprouting. It is the
suuie substance w Itich tho busy little
bee introduces into its honey, drop
ping n tiny bit of this poison into thu
honeycomb from the cud of its sting.
The famous naturalist Moggi-idgo
repeatedly observed that when the
ants were prevented from reaching
their grannitries the seeds began to
sprout, and that this also happened
when they ab indone I their ii-st-s. it
was inferred that those insi c s pos
sessed the m miis of suspending tho
action without destroying the vitn'ity
of the grain, and the principle of life
hidden in tho sand; mil now it has
been proved tint this strange power
lies iu the formic acid just mentioned.
A G riiiun scion id went so far as to
suggest iu 1-S77 the Use ef it for pie
serving fruit for human hotis-holds.
One naturalist relates that a kind of
Indian ant collects lirge stores of
grass and seeds, and alter a severe
storm brings out th i entire stock
within tho grannaries to dry it for it
seems the excessive moisture destroys
the preservative power of this acid.
Another tribe of nuts which lavs up
immense quantities of wheat a id oats,
is so small th it eight or ten individu
als are required to carry a single
grain. They move in separate rows,
over rough and smooth ground, up
and down steps, often tiavelling hun
dreds of yards to placo their booty in
the common storehouse, where it i i
preserved according to the means de
scribed. Atlanta Constitution.
An Knipcror's Curious Hobby.
The German Emperor, whose hob
bies take various direction' connected
with engineering marine, locomotive
and military possesses a sph n lid
working model of a railway, with i-n
gines, cars, points, signals and stu
tions. This ho works ostensibly toi
the amusement of his children ir.
reality, for the pleasure and reoreu
tion it affords to himself. The de
signing ami working of small steam ot
oil launches is another of the German
Kmperor'rt favorite pastimes. Of the-e
he possesses a large number. He ha
recently given nn order to a famuli
Thames builder for a little electric
launch, which, when finished, will be
as prettily furnished and speedy n
littlo craft as flouts. In the palace at
Herlin the whole floor space of ono
great room is frequently the itreiia foi
the make-believe manoeuvres of whole
troops of toy soldiers, with mimic
cannon, artillery, ammunition wagons,
tents, fortresses and all the pomp and
panoply of modern warfare. -Tit- Hit..
Hot Water fur a Ciihl.
"During dangerous weatli-r of th s
sort," said the old doctor, "the most
careful persons are apt to catch u cold
in their chests that will extend swift
ly to the lungs if not attended to. it
usually makes its presenc- known by
a constricted sensation just un b-r tho
breastbone, where th i tl -sh is the
thinnest. When a person experiences
this feeling he can rest assured that
he can procure almost instant relief
by drinking a cup of water as lmt as
he can bear to tako in the mouth and
swallow- There is no better medicine
in the world to arrest tho progress of
a cold than hot water, a id, besides
its effect upon the stomach and the
system generally, it is be'ioticial in the
highest degree. And in soro throat
the remedy will be found almost a
specific." Washington Star.
Hid Her Host.
Mamma I hope you behaved like a
little lady wh'le Mrs. Hightouo w is
trying to entertain you?
Small D iiighter Yes'm. I put my
h iitd ovt-r my month everv timo I
vawned. Good News.
One Day.
t will HI you when they met;
In the limpiil days of spring;
Kliter boughs wero budding yet,
Oaken houghs looked wintry still,
Uut primrose, mid veined violet
I-.t tho ntossfiil turf were set.
While mooting birds made haste, to sing
Ami build with right good will.
I will tell you when they parted :
When plenteous autumn sheaves wero brovrn,
Tln-n they parted, heavy hearted;
The full rejoicing sun looked down
As grand us In the days before;
Only they trn-1 lost a crown;
Only to the n thoso days of y ro
Could eiiiue lwk never more.
When shall they meet? I ennnot te".,
Indeed, when they shall meet again ;
Except some day in Puruilise ;
l-'or this they wait, one waits in pain.
Jteyond the sea of death love lies
1'orever, yesterday, today:
Angels shall ask them. "Is it well.'"
And they plmll answer, Yea."
Ill M0K01 S.
A man of many phases 'The man in
the moon.
"Your days are numbered, "says tho
blotter to the calendar.
"What makes a mule kick?" "Samo
thing that mukesa mini kick his leg."
He - Why is justice represented as a
woman? She Because her work is
never done.
"Iu tho last church fair did tho
young Indies tako part?" Mr. Slim
purse. Great Scott, no ; they took all
I had!
Miss Hobinson --Whnt a worn look
Mr. Briggs' fuco has. Bradford No
wonder, lie has traveled on it for
years.
A schoolboy in a recent examination
paper defined piirnll- l straight lines
as "lines that meet at the f ir end of
infinity. "
' I'.-r miirrim;'' choose your opposite."
At llr-t I thought that rash ;
l!ut I shall choose my opposite
1 want n girl with culi.
Nu wed Do you always let your
wife have ln r own way? Coolhed
Always; but I show her that my way
is her way.
About the only thing that prevents
some men from telling benrfaeed lies
is the fact that they wear whiskers or
a moustache.
Hoax There goes a man who will
treat you, and then make you pay for
it. Joux What is he a beat? Hoa"x
-- No ; a doctor.
Jack (insinuatingly) How would
you like to lend a friend 10? Tom
I'd be only too glad, but I haven't a
friend iu the world.
A naturalist tells us that a snipe hns
a nerve running dear down to the end
of his bill. So has the plumber. How
wonderful aro nature's works!
"Is the littlo Smith boy a great
favorite iu school?" Jiinuiio Well,
1 should say so. Thoro isn't a fellow
iu school but what ho can lick.
It was a man of apt remark, who described a
stammering man
As one who tfot his language out on the iu
stntiiient p nu.
Briller Yon seem to have a faculty
for using big words. Is it inherited?
Friller Well, my father owned ouo of
the biggest dictionaries ever made.
"This thermometer appears to bo
stationary," n m irked tho man who
kicks. "To bo sure," replied his wife;
"I bought it in a stationary store."
Mrs. Knervz rang the bell for tho
servant. "Norah," she said, "I'll
feed the ciliary myself after this. The
doctor says 1 must take luoro exer
cise." "How did Scranlinsget his reputa
tion for originality?" "Very simply.
He makes it a rule to know nothing
whatever nbout tho topic on which ho
w rites.''
Grandma Now, Bobbie, what kind
of pio do you like best? Bobbie I
don't know just what you'd call it but
it's what takes a whole pio to nuiko
one piece.
'J'!i"r" isn't any use to sigh
Nor tiny it 1" frown.
The maiden turns tin- gas up high
Wlifii shi'liirustlu' voting man dowa.
My denr sir, don't you soe I've been
preaching to a congregation of jack
asses?" "Oh, I s-e ! I wondered
why you kept on calling 'em 'beloved
brethren.' "
She And you say that Dr. Turner
is a particular friend of yours? He
Bather! Why, he made me a baronet.
She How's that? Ho Hy killing off
my uuclo and cousin, to be sure.
Mr. Softie Is there anything I can
do to prove my devotiou? Miss
Beautio Y-e-s, there is. "Name it,"
"When you call bring somo haudsomo
and entertaining gentlemm with
you."
He Would you like the date put
on our engagement ring, my dear?
She By all means; aud thin if there
is room mu io some little motto like
"A bird in the Hand," or something
like that.