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VOL. XVII.
PlTTSnORO', CHATHAM CO., N. C, MAY 0, 1895.
NO. 37.
i II nil
C'Iiooho Vo!
The man whoso own IndomHablo will
Can calmly moot an uuforesoeu disaster,
And, single-handed, grapple it, until
Trlumpliautly ho crowns himself its master,
Cam mauds our admiration, auil presents
"A Mau" superior to his accidents.
AVIillo ho who yields to sensuous inclinations,
Thus doadculug all his Intellectual gifts,
"W 111 sacrillco his noblest aspirations
As down tho stream ho indolently drifts,
And thoy who helped him ouco his burdens
shoulder
Quietly pass him by as they grow older.
Tho one poors through tho clouds with eagln
vision,
And gets aglimpse ot life beyond tho stars ;
The other, with Miotic; Indecision,
Drifts BlmmolusBly behind sin's prison bars
And thus in contrast theso two live are soon,
Ono grandly uoble, ouo abjectly mean.
Thus man, wet learn from theso two illus
trations,
Can by the power of character control
Tho sourco from which shall cunio the inspi
rations
That shall forever save or damn his soul.
It is for us to choose between the two j
What shall tho future register for you?
fci. 8. I.ovktt, in New York Hun.
TWO OPAL RINGS.
C'lmrlio Clifton, of the. Pan-gal Cav
alry, had bought two opal rings of u
wandering jicdlor. What did ho euro
about tho superstition regarding tho
stones? His fellow-oflicor, Allonby,
was only laughed at for warning him
against tho purchase.
Cliftou rode oir with the rings,
while his friend strolled over to where
tho pedler was tying up his pn;!;.
"See here," ho mid, "h .-re's a rupee
for you. Now tell me about those
rings. Tho sahib has bought them,
and ypu nan tell mo tho truth now."
"Master promis- not to tell tho
other sahib, and I will tell him," re
plied tho old mm. Allonby gave tho
required promise.
"Those jewels very unlucky jewels,"
be0an tho uucuut vendor. "They
making very bad luck to different peo
ples. First sahib who bought them
was Maharajah of Karospoor. Tho sa
hib kuows what happened to him.
Thou Fortescu , sahib at Kotibad,
bought them. That poor gcuth'iiriu
killed out riding very next day. After,
Kotibad merchant buying those jewels,
nnd liia house burnt down next week
Then all tho people saying: 'These
very bad jewels.' and all very much
nfraid to buy them. That mcrehai
wanting to sell them to me ; but i too
nlraid to buy. Then another nun to
mo those jewels only bud for three
people. 'ou buy and then sell them,
nnd next purchaser will have gooi
luck. That's all, sahib, I tell nihil
whole truth. I ho sahib who has
bought those jewels will have good
luck, if God will.-."
Tho old man took his departure and
Allonby continued to muse over his
queer story. "After all," ho thought,
"it may simply have been a coinci
dence that those three people s'iuld
Lave come to grief. Anyhow, 1 hope
old Clifton won't havu bad luck
Meanwhile the subject o" APonhv's
thoughts hail reined in in front of a
pretty little bungalow half way up the
Kharpnr Hill, where most of the resi
dents of tho station had their biiuga
lows, and where what brcezo there was
in tho placj coul. 1 bo enjoyed by the
jaded plain dwellers. At the sound of
his horse's hoofs a young girl who had
been reclining nt ease on a dock chair
on tho veranda hastily rose. Nettie
Vernon was a pretty sight that aftt r.
noon, with her golden hair nnd tho
English-roses still in her cheeks. So
thought Clifton, aud he thought, too,
what a lucky fellow ho was to hnvo
won her.
"Why, Sir Other," mid the young
lady, with tho light of laughter in her
eyes and its dimples in her cheeks,
"what brings you hero eo early this
nfteruoon? Have you been promoted?
Are you ordered to the frontier to
fighttho Russians, or what? lo tell
me, nnd don't -oh I don't look so
sorious." The young flicer looked
down nt tho bewitching upturned fucc,
aud then !
"Pid you conic nil this way to do
that?" asked Miss Vernon with mock
reproach. "Oh, how foolish and hot
hoaded tho young men of tho present
day are. Now, when 1 was young
oh!" Tho sentence was not finished.
''Look here, Nettie," said her lover,
"what do you think of this ring?
That's what brought, me here. Isn't
it a beautiful opal? And tho most
beautiful girl in Pungul shall wear it
if she liken. "
"Oh, Charlie, what a dear you ni e !"
cried the young lady, in delight, "but
aren't opals very unlucky?"
"Thcro you go," said tho disoom
fittcd lover, "you are as b id ns
Allonby, who has been croaking on
tho subject like E Igar Allen Poe's
'Raven. ' ''
"I didn't say they were u'ducky,"
pleaded Miss Vernon ; "1 only asked
if '.Jey weren't. I am pure, Charlie
dear, nothing will bo unlucky that you
givo me," sho added swootly.
In another moment tho ring wasou,
and tho two lovers, comparing thoir
jowcls, thought thorn quitu tho nicest
in Kharpnr.
A few days lator Cliarlio Cliftou was
driving to tho Kharpnr station. It
was the day of the Sawarbad races.
Snwarbud was somo forty miles from
Kharpur, and a largo party waa going
over. Tho railway station was a
couple of miles from Clifton's bunga
low. He had driven about half way
whou ho discovered his famous opal
ring was not on hia linger. "Con
found it!" ho exclaimed; "I must
have taken it off when I washed my
hands. I must have it. I promised
Nettie never to take it oil"; besides it
might bo stolen, I shall have to go
back." Ho turned his horsu'a head
und drove rapidly home. He found
tho ring; aud he found also when he
got to tho railway station that the train
had gone without him. Poor fellow,
how sick he felt as ho walked out of
tho station. Nettie must havo gone
without him ; and ho had been looking
forward so much to tho outing. A
dreadful feeling of desolation took
possession of him. It seemed to him
that he was separated forever from his
beloveil. lie cursed tho opal ring
which had been the cause of his mis
fortune. Was it really going to bring
him ill luck after all, ho wondered? A
sound of wheels approaching niado
In in look ui. Was it possible? Ho
knew tliu cart. Ho knew the driver,
Miss Vernon drove ui looking the
prettiest of pictures in a new straw
hat and a most becoming frock. After
all, there is not always such a great
gulf fixed between Paradise and til
other place !
"Wo must bo quick, Clisrlie, criei
the young lady, as sho threw down the
reins. "I havo run it very Cue,
know. "
"Don't hurry, darling," was lit'
(over's reply, given in a calm an
leisurely maimer ho could ulTord to
bj calm and leisurely now "tho train
has gone without us."
"Oh, what a pity!" cried Nettie,
clasping her hands, "hut never mind.
dear, wo havo got each other," am
she look-id at tho young man iu a way
that more than consoled htm for all his
disappointment. "And now," said th
young lady, "I daresay vou'd like lo
know how it is I niu so Into. Do you
know, sir, it is really all your fault?
Yes it w.is. It's no good denying it
It was that opal ring of yours that fell
off you know it was rather largo for
me. Well, 1 spoilt no end of time
looking for it. I thought I should
never find it ; but I did, and here it is.
Hut what on earth makes you staro so.
Don't do it, dear; you look to ugly,
und you aro really not such a bad look
ing boy in your normal state."
Poor Clifton explained the cause of
his own delay, which he had been try
ing to do for some time, but his fair
lady had not given him a chaiic
"Now, dearest," ho concluded,
' Moesu t it strike you as very curious
that wo should both of us have been
delayed on account of our opal rings?
I wonder what it means?"
"Yes, I wonder, too," said Nettie,
nodding her golden head reflectively.
Put they both of them knew an
hour or two later, when tho terrible
news of the breaking down of the
Pathnrpar bri dgo iind.'r the train they
would havo gone by reached the sta
tion. And in the days of grief und
desolation that followed for Kharpur
they found timo to wonder why they
two should have boen saved. Charlie
and Nettie aro older now, but they
still wear their opal rings thoso rings
which, instead of bringing them ill
luck, saved them from an awful aud
sudden death. At least so they regard
the matter. The (treat Divide.
Japnnos" Proverbs.
The ignorant are never defeated iu
any argument.
A woman with a throe-inch touguo
can slay a giant.
1 mliting minds will ever briug a
swarm of demons.
Patience is tho rope of advancement
iu all lines of life.
With a mote iu tho eye onj cannot
see the Himalaya.
Everybody has eight eyes for his
neighbor's business.
When tho seuse of shamo is lost,
advancement ceases.
Genius hears one individual aud
then comprehends ten.
Negligence looks at the battle-field,
then uiakeii its arrows.
A woman without jealousy is like a
bill without elasticity.
Tho fish which escapes from the
hook seems iilwavs tho largest.
Who steals goods is called a thief;
who steals dominions, a ruler.
Seeking information is a moment's
shame ; but not to learn is surely a
lasting shame. Detroit Free Press,
Killed a II g Wildcat.
A short timo ago Nato Boweu, a
qunrrymuu, shot the largest wildcat
that has been killed for years in this
region, says a Port Jorvis, N. Y., let
ter to tho New York Sim. It weighed
35 pounds and was ouo of two cats that
had for months carried off tho chick
ens, turkeys and small lambs of tho
fanners iu that region. This was the
female cat. The male cat was known
to bo still lurking in the woods neat
Deposit, N, r., and 15oweu aud W. ).
Curtis resolved to run tho animal
down. Their efforts have been re
warded by tho capture of one of tho
largest and most ferocious of its
species. They tramped through the
woods for several days nud finally
drove tho wildcat into its den, which
was a cavo in a ledgo of rocks. They
sot several fox traps in tho several
passageways of the cave, but when
they visited the cave to ascertain the
tho results they found that tho beast
had sprung them and then smashed
them as if they had beeu so many
toys. They then procured a bear trap
and set it where tho c it could not
avoid it. On,,' line morning this week
they missed tho trap. Investigation
showed that tho cat had dragged it
back into tho darkest corner of its
lair. Curtis volunteered to enter the
cave. He had gone but a short dis
tance when hu caught sight of tho eyes
of tho infuriated boast, and he hastily
drew his rille and fired. Ho was
greeted by a savage snarl and a rat
tling of the trap as tho mutual re
treated further back iu tho den. Cur
tis then came out, and Nato Dowon
said he would "tackle tho varmint."
He tied a stout, rope nrouiid bis w.iist,
and leaving Curtis at tho other end of
it he entered tho den. Creeping along
with revolver .in hand he heard the
screech of th-1 cat and the jingling of
the traji, as tho wounded beast Hew at
him. He was iu very close quarters,
but his courage did not forsake him.
I5y a quick movement ho liied his re
volver, aud the shot luckily took effect
just as tho animal reached lit in, nud it
fell dead tit his feet. Curtis, becom
ing alarmed, pulled on the ropj and
hauled Nate to the surface, aud with
him tho wildcat, which ho had seized
by the ears. Powen was none tho
worse for his venture, although he bad
a close call.
A Woman's (Jiieer Pets.
A young woman residing m ar Mon
roe, hi., hai ii pair of pet wasps,
which are interest iug as they are unique
in their way. She has trained them to
p rform a great many wonderful
tricks, and it is marvelous to what de
gree of intelligence aud agility her
kindly caro and patient perseverance
litis brought them. As the young lady
is an invalid, she manages to get a
great deal of profitable diversion from
her queer lit t lo pets.
Among other things she has taught
them to drink water from u thimble
and to perform tho "skirt dance", ns
she calls it, by iliitteriug "their ings
as they rest on the palm of her hand.
They will sing at her bidding, making
faint almost inaudible cheep, and
s.'cm to be passionately f ind of music.
Tho young lady is a fine musician,
and when she plays ou the piano the
wasps take up their position ou the
music rack and never budg uutil the
performance is over.
Tho wasps would seem to have a
ood deal of vanity, and nothing de
lights them more than to bo allowed
to walk about und inspect themselves
on a little hand mirror, which is kept
for their exclusive use. Strange to re
late the wasp have never been known
to attempt to sting anybody, although
they have free access to all parts of
the house, aud aro seldom confined,
even at night. Philadelphia Times.
All Interesting Ilaudit.
'Mautiel Garcia was a curious char
acter, said a Cuban gentleman in
speaking of the reported death of that
revolutionist. "He was more liko a
harnctcr in u novel than a man living
in the nineteenth century. His homo
was the mountains and ho led a regu
lar bandit's life, every now and tin u
holding-up Spaniards uti tho road or
carrying off ono of them nnd holding
him for ransom. Ho would write to
a Spanish planter, 'solid mo $5,00() or
I shall burn your house.' and if the
money wa-t not forthcoming ho would
any his threat into execution. Ho
would even write to Governmental
officials, signing himself, 'King of the
Mountains,' and demanding tribute.
lo never preyed ou the native Cu
ans, only on the Spaniards, and gave
most of his money to the revolution
ary party to purchase arms." Phila
delphia Press.
The Federal Government of Mexico
offers a bonus ef four cents for every
rubber tree planted. In addition to
this, tho State Government of Oa.xac
offers ouo cent.
ALWAYS III. All.
When III) opened Ills eyes ea-il m orlll'IJ
lie was glad to be awake;
He was glad when called to break fa.-1,
And reai'.y Ills pla-u to take.
He was glad to hear the school bell.
And glad when culled to hi- class,
for lie always had Ills bsson,
Whatever might coino to pn-.-i.
He was gla 1 at recess mi 1 noontime,
And nlwa.s on hand for play ;
And glad to be going homeward,
When school was closed for the day.
He was glad to help his mother,
And frolic with littl11 I'red ;
And w!i ill he w is lirel a-nl sle -jiy,
ITi w.n glad to go to h 'd,
ihxu 1 1 Alt r Srosi:, in Youth's Companion.
STHK.NliTIl or A JI'MI'INO MIUSK.
In proportion to its size, I believe
the jumping mouse is the most active
and powerful of all vertebrate nuimiils.
This tiny creature no larger than a
man s thumb is from two and one
half to thivc ini-his in length, with a
tail about twice as long as the head
and body. It is therefor o no larger
than a house mouse, but it has light
forequ li ters, strong hindquarters, very
long hiug legs, and it can jump from
eight to ten feet. If a mouse Weigh
ing two ounces (average) can jump ten
feet, how far should a 10:) pound boy
of cqu il agility be able to jump? Fig
ure it out for yourself nnd when you
have obtained the correct, answer yon
will properly appreciate the hind h g
of this wonderful mite. St. Nicholas.
TWO I.ITTI.K AMItliKANS AT PKNMAKIv's
iiirur.
Virginia Yeainiui ll'inuitz, in St.
Nicholas, tells a true story of the ad
ventures of two young Americans at
the court of the King of Denmark.
They were children of tho American
minister, and had been invited to n
children's party ut the palace. Here
is what followed :
It was to Ellen a never-to-be-forgotten
night. The crowd ' of happy chil
dren; the gnat room, brilliantly
lighted; tho Mini ns of music; the
presence of a real king and queen
all combined to make the scene a fairy
land, w herein events took place which
made Ellen feel herself a sort of fairy
queen.
The king opened the ball with little
Eden. Hardly understanding the
honor, some sense of it nevertheless
thrilled her childish heart. Sho could
not even K"o his face, so tall was he,
hut his id rung arms bore her around
and around, she knew not how, foi
Ellen danced with as little precision
a id method as the leaves on a tree, or
tin; lvppl -a iu a lake. Yet all through
her being she felt that she was danc
ing with the king. It seemed but lit
ling, after that dance, to thid hersell
scale 1 ou th s sof.i b.;twccu tho king
uid queen. With royal disregard to
the claims of other small guests, and
with royal indifference to tho effect
upon little Fllcn, they lifted her up
between them. Slio looked pretty,
natural and uncoil ieioiis, and was her
self a little queen iu all her ways!
While Ellen mt th -re, too happy and
pleased to feel proud, the other chil
dren daueed on. With no thought of
imitating their elders in manners or
motion, tho young dancers abadoned
themselves with childish freedom aud
simplicity to tho enjoyment of
the hour. Those who never had
beeu trained to tho dill' lent step,
adaptedtheir m iveineiits to the prompt
ings of happy hearts and light feet,
and were as contented as the others.
And little Elleu, rested comfortably be
tween the king and queen uutil slio
was ready to dance again.
The evening wore on, and Ellen
w.is overcome with weariness and
sleep. Slipping away from the chil
dren, wiio now were whirling around
iu some dizzy ginie, she threw herself
.ou a couch, dint as the scene grew
misty to her eves, and the dazzling
events of the evening began to weave
themselves into the suggestion of a
dream, she was aroused by some olio
asking, "Where did you get your
pretty pink slippers, Ellen?" and she
opened her eyes. Why was the king
sitting beside her and talking to hel
when she was so sleepy? She had a
coiiiu ed idea that he ought to put on
his crown, and sit on a throne.
"Piease, Mr. Kin', don't bover me ;
I'm so sleepy ;" and Ellen, turning
her face upon royalty, slipped away
to her pleasin ; dreams. "Little El
len, little Ellen," said tho King inns
iugly, "it is not often that I hear the
truth so plainly told, aud it is refresh
ing lo in y ears."
Worse Thau Itehur Jilted.
"Where is the pretty girl you wcro
making love to last summer?"
"Oh, slu's married long ago."
"Jilted you, eh?"
"No, w erse than that; sh nnrried
in " Inter-Ocean.
STUDKXT DUKLS.
A Curious Manifestation in Ger
man University Life,
The Contestants Try to Mutilate
Each Other's Faces.
One of the most curious manifesta
tions iu German student life is tho
duel. This is carried on for tho most
part by the members of the secret so
cieties. There aro certain obligations
as to the personal behavior resting
upon all the students who aro not
"wild men." Antiquated customs ex
ist iu regard to the salute id' an ac
quaintance, the method of con duct at
a drinking festival and in tho great
field of university social relations iu
general. These written and unwritten
rules mint b.i carefully observed, or
the penalty is a challenge, which cus
tom requires that th j student shall
accept.
it may neither Iu pleasant nor
necessary to givo a description of one
of these encounters. Tho task has
been done before, and it only remains
to eit j a few f icls in regard to an in
stitution which it is a little marvellous
the Germans do n it tiud some method
to abolish. The dipd or "m .'lisur,"
as it is eitlteil, is ti n ;lit in various
w iys, with various weapon i and ac
cording to different rules. There are
duels with sabres and with rapiers,
with sharp swords nud with dull
swords. This is usually a matter of
personal choice or rest perhaps upon
a local tradition. Tho weapon used
generally goes by the name Sehlaeger,
and there are a;aiu different classes,
such as the Korb.schlaeger or basket
hilted rapier and the Gloekeusehlac
ger, a heavy weapon m id i of hard
bell metal. The latter is nu arm
which has been ill favor iu late years
ut L ipsie and II ille.
The student duel, however, is not
always the outgrowth of an insult or a
liiippposed insult. There is another
form which is, perhaps, the more
usual, and which leads to a greater
number of encounters. This is the
"Pro patria" duel, which is a contest
between clubs at regular intervals.and
it is carried on merely for the pleas
urable excitement which those that
participate nnd those who look on
draw from it. The combatants arc
inmnlly chosen by a will rather than
their own. Though there are some
times volunteers, The President, as a
rule, selects iioine lin inber of his club
who shall on a certain day meet a
member of another club similarly
chosen by its President. Contests ar
ranged in this way are very numerous.
It is desired that each club shall pro
vide a man at least onej a week, and.
us there aro at th i largo universities
quite a largo number of fightin,' so
cieties, the comb it w ages very fre
quently. It is this tyrannous, obli
gatory feature of the duel which
makes it such a pcrsistenl evil iu G r
niau university life.
The duellist must bj specially dressed
for the comb it in a suit called the
Paukwiehs, which consists of heavy
bandaging for tho neck and arms, a
thick piece of upholstery, somewhat
like a mattress, which is suspended
over the breast, and gliifs goggles to
protect the eyes. There are some
times covers for the ears also. The
point of attack is thus the head and
face, another curious symptom of the
studeut duel. It is thus that part of
the body which nearly nil other people
aim the most carefully to guard from
injury which it is the particular desire
to mutilate and sear.
It is to be noted also that the rules
are such as to protect the rest
of the body. Th; 'strike must
be mad ! in only a certain way, and
each coiitbutaLt has a s coiid, also
armed with a sword, who tun t ward
oil' foul blows. It is further a curi
ous feature that a single wound dues
not sullbo to settle the d.lli mlty. IJoth
combatants are ottcii injured, ami it
is not unusual for each to receive sev
eral wounds. The contest only ends
indeed, by the exhaustion of one or
the other party, or at the expiration
of the time limit. Philadelphia Tele
graph. A M liable Church.
One of tho most unique houseii ol
worship ever elected iu Iowa, or p.vs
sildy in this country, stands at No.
1HS West avenue, out o:i West Hill,
Ilurlington. It is Missionary .1. It.
Crawford's movable tabernacle, w hich
was de. heated last Sunday with unique
services. llie strueiiire. is made of
'ron and wood on a steel frame. It is
milt ill sections Nx'J feet, iu size, each
section being hinged so as to fol 1 into
aspaoeofHxlJ feet, l'.ieh section is
numbered to aid in fitting the parts
t igether.
The outside of this unique cdif.v is
vii e itu ae I iron und tho Hit jrpjr is
lined with hnrd pine. Tho walls nnd
sid .'H are erected on a steel frame,
which can itself be taken apart and
placed iu a small compass. The in
terior of the building is lighted by
windows, which slip into tho lining of
tho sections while being transported,
to prevent injury to the glass.
Tho interior of the building is heated
by two stoves so arranged as to tako
iu alltdie piping during transportation.
Tho building has folding benches,
will Heat about 5'0 people. Every
thing used iu the erection of the build
ing is turned to some good account.
Even the derrick ou which the frame
and sides were raised was afterwards
turned into a rostrum for the speaker.
When the building i.s in pieces, this
derrick forms the wugoii-bodon which
the sections are loaded for transporta
tion. Mr. Crawford found in his travel
through the country iiinny places
where the people anted services, but
had no hall or room large enough for
tiie purpose, and iu many cases no
room at all. The idea of such a build
ing as the one herein ile.cnbcd oc
curred to him, and hi was not long iu
draw ing up the plans and putting them
into execution. The building can bo
"knocked down," packed up, trans
ported into another township, and
erected by two men ill less than three
days at a cost of 1 ss than 81-. It is
so in ranged that it can h- set up on
any kind of ground, rolling or 1 rvel.
-- ('iiiTespoiidi uco of St. Louis Re
public. Tiger Hunting.
"The season for t:ger hunting be
gins iu April and lasts until the moii
so in. I luring this timo it is int -nsi ly
hot. Water courses fail, springs go
dry, pools evaporate. Then wild beasts
of all kinds leave those remoter tracts
to which tiny retire at other seasons,
ami gather about drinking places ill
foot hills nnd jungly low lands. In beat
ing lorn tiger the start is never inulo
i'iirl iu the day. This creature, whoso
stiueiure forms nn uiieipiulcd me
chanism for offence, possesses little
endurance in the heat of the sun, sup
ports thirst wry badly, nnd soon
breaks down from scorched feet if har
ried by day. Therefore, when its lair
is found the sportsmen wait until the
sun rises high before starting out.
Tln ir hunt is almost certain to be
among those ravines wiioro tno tiger
lies up, and not usually until the last
extremity will lie break out into the
turning plains. Still tigers jure not
organic machines made to act by in
stinct iu an invariable manner. Some
wilt ass mil at sight, others sulk and
dml ;c through lialas for a long period
before the beaters mid w ill not attack
until Wounded. No human being who
has not seen a tiger tight can couivivc.
what their charge is like. " -Outing.
Must Ho Something.
"Mammi," i-aid .lack, "may I gi;
out and plav ? '
"No; you must sit i till where you
are.
l'a use.
"Ma, can't I g' down iu thu
kitchen?"
'You may nu. 1 want you to l it
perfectly quiet."
Another pause.
"Mammy, mayn't 1 sit on the lloor
and play marbles?'' I
"Now, my dear boy, I have told
you twice that 1 want you to t-i t just I
where you are an 1 be quiet, and I '
mean ex ictlv what 1 say."
Third pause. j
"Ma---may I---grow ?"- H irper's :
Young People.
Slnrs in the Mediterranean. !
The opening of the Sue, t'.mal has '
been commercially of iunii -use benefit
to the world, but in one respect it has ,
uen a disadvantage. IVior to the
existence of the Suez dual sharks
were u'l'iiiiiwn iu the Mediterranean, i
but sine the opening of the groat
waterway it is reported that they have '
appeared iu large numbers in that :
s 'ii, where their presence is much
feared bv fishermen. On more than ;
one occasion inev nave wroiigui navoe !
among the t:sUcrmeii s nets in ine '
ghboihoo.l of Pola, in the Adri- ;
ntie, from which it may be inferred j
that tin y are now pretty well diffused j
throughout the Mediterranean.
Chambers' Journal.
loo Sudden.
Clergyman (show ing a lady visitor
round the church) Now, madam, you
have seen the. org m, the font, and the
n ive, I shoul I next liko to conduct
you to the altar.
Ijadv Vis tor Oh! this is no md
dui. ('lunch lieview.
One-fourth of t'l" visitors to New
York's Metropolitan Art .Museum dm-.
inglH.lt c ui regate l there on Suu-da-1
Indications.
Th st riuil robin's primal notn
Has not as yet boeu beard,
The robin, after ull, is a
liisereet and foxy bird.
He doesn't risk pneumonia
lly coming back to sing
IMore its time; and yet without
Jlis tune wo know it's spring.
Tlicro l a softness in the air
And also in tho mud.
That bids man blithely to rejoice
And purify bis blood.
The buds lire starting on the treos,
A ha -.o lies on the hills,
"J'is time to pick out garden see li,
And take some livr pills.
The noonday sun is getting high,
Your coal is getting low ;
Your outside windows aro a bore,
The dust lii gins to blow.
The grass is starting hero nud there,
Life shows iu everything,
And baseball betting has begun -
Hail to thee, gentle spring!
-- Koniorvill" Jnuriia'
HOOKUPS.
Repairs Second marriages.
A suit for diimng s IJlue overalls.
A side show attraction A pretty
polile.
Truth was stranger than fiction to
A nan ins.
Monunit utal liars A good inciiy
gravest on i s.
In what month do women talkleantV
Iu February.
Many u man is expected to bo the
architect of his son-in-law's fortune.
Elderly Lodger How did you sleep
last night, professor? Prof. Larkins
Lying down, madiiui.
Mrs. Watts - l a't you ever do
anything ut all? Weary Wntkins
Oil, yes, iiiii' i. Sometilil .-s I does
time.
I'.lobbi Why do you call one of
your relatives aunt and the other
nwnt? Slobbs Well, tho other has
money.
Tho football problem is in a fair
way to solve itself. The colleges that
can't win the penuaut are discarding
the game.
Johnny Slow A hen can't never be
n rooster. Andy Smart Yes she can
when sho gets into the chicken
house at night.
lb r hps said "So,"
iJut her eyes s aid "y ' ,"
P.y which did I go?
Ah 1 can't you guesai'
No sweet cares
I 'id I omit :
l'ur her eyes sai l "Yes."
And "the ayes had it.
"Just us I was proposing to her a
mouse ran under her chair." "Aud
did she scream?" "She did, after nlio
had said 'yes.' "
Peter I tell yo'i, to have a bank
accotrit like mine, is just linked
sweetness! Paul How's that? Peter
Long drawu out !
Customer 1 want n new hat but of
the very latest style. Salesman
Please be seated a few minutes madam
the Mylv is jus' going to cluing.'!
Paily They say the art of chasing
silver is a very difficult one. Horrow
it 1 know it is. I've been trying till
the day to find a man who would lend
me half u dollar.
Mamma S illy, if you had a little
spunk you'd stand bettt r in your class.
lo you know what spim't is? Sally
(nioodly) I suppose it's the puat
particle of ".-punk."
"I-n't it sad," as-lied the Joiiiig girl
romantically, "to think of the roses of
yester year?'' "It is" said tho young
man emphatically. "1 Lave uu uu
paid llonst's bill of $M.
The other day I ("and a .;n;e.
And with a satire line,
ll.-empty pi.eke-s greeted Hi".
Alas! th il pe..se was iniiie.
Proud Father Thut is a sunset my
daugliti i painted. S!ie ttudii il paint
ing abroad, you know. Friend Ah!
that explains it. I never saw a suu
tct like that in this country.
F.ist Lidy If i d a face like yours
I'd bio mini' Well boil it. Second do
Yes a id if I'd a face like yours I
wouldn't go out with it on Sundays
for fear of bieakiu' th Sabbith!
Tom -The management seem to
have spired no expense in the pro
puetioti of this play. Kitty No, in
deed; they havegiviu cieh chorus
girl at leu-t three c mts of puitit.
Mr. So ntly (four feet eight inches
to Lcanti ! Yes, I a n proud to say I
am a self-made man. Miss Iieanti's
Little Brother Why didn't you make
more of you while you was at it?
"Tapp dts seems to be getting more
absent minded every day since he has
been married." "That isn't absent
mind luess. It is the habit every
umi lied man gets into by learning not
t i listen while his wife is talking."
'!'!ie I! i:ik of England has 0(11),
Ot'-! ot private deposits inti listed to its
:aro. ns well us $2(1.(1011,000 of public
niony.