North Carolina Newspapers

J U v Vx BE SURE YOU ARE EIGHT ; THEIST GO AHEAD.-D. Crockett. VOL. 54. TARBORO', N. C, FRIDAY, MAY 6, 187G. NO. 21. i . - ENERA.L DIRECTORY. TAUIIOKO'. M wok Fred. l3iiili i is. Commissioners lesfc A. Williamson. ,ia- rob KeUiunlieimcr, Diu'ul W. liurtt, Al.-x. MeCabe, Joseph Cobb. SucuiiTAUY & TkSVjwisiiK kubl. White hurst. Chief on- Iomci: K.lm v . Assistant I'oi.ice foil" Ma-J Si.uouson, Aliimore Marnnir. E. t Clerk and Prolate .' II. L. Staton, Jr. 'lister of Deeds Alex, Mc'Jabe. Sheriff josaph Cobb. Coroner Treasurer Tlobt. II. Auntiu. Surveyor John E. Baker. Standard Keeper J. B. Hyatt. Sa.'wol Kramin.rs. II. II. Shaw Wm. A. Oilman rind K. S. Williams. Keeper I'oor House Wm. A. Dujrsian. Commissioners Jno. Lancaster, Chairman, Wiley Well, J. B. W. Norville, Frank Dew, M. Esem. A. McCabc, Clerk. hails. AKRIVU, AND DEPARTURE OF MAILS .NORTH AXD SOUTH VIA W. & W. K. K. Loave Tarboro' (daily) at 10 A. M; Arrive at Tarboro' (daily) at - - 3 30 I . 31. WASHINGTON MAIL VIA GREENVILLE. FALKLAND AND SPARTA. Leave Tarboro' (daily) at - - -- M Arrive at Tarboro' (daily) t - - G 1. J.. rhe MfftiW. and tUe Places of Melding:. Concord K. A. Chapter No. 5, X. M. Law rence, High Priest, Masonic Hall, monthly convocations first Thursday in evury mouth at 10 o'clock A. M. Concord Lode No. 5S, Thomas Gatlin, .Master, Masonic Hall, meets first Friday night it 7 o'clock 1. M. and third Saturday at 10 o'clock A. M. in every mouth. Repiton Encampment No. 13, I. O. O. F., I. K. Palamountain, Chief Patriarch, Odd Fel lows' Hall, meets every lirst and third Thurs day of each month. Ed 'eeombe Lodse No. 50, I. O. 0. F., T. W. Toler, N. G., Odd Fellows' Hall, meets very Tuesday night. Edgecombe Council No. 122, Friends of Temperance, meet every Friday night at the Odd Fellows' Hall. Advance Lodge No. I. O. G. T., meets every Weducsday night at there Hall. Zanoah Lodge, No. 235, I. O. B. B., meet on first and third Mondav night of every month at Odd Fellows' Hall, A. Whitlock, l'fesident. CIiriiCHES. Episcopal Church Services every Sunday st 10 1-2 o'clock A. M. and 5 P. M. Dr. J. IS. Cheshire, Rector. Methodist Church Services every Fourth Sunday ot every mouth, morning aud night. l6t Sunday :it night and 5th Sunday at nighr. Rev. Mr. Swindell, Pastor. Presh'iierinn Church S-.-rvices every 1st, Srd and' 5th Sabbnhs. Rev. T. J. Allison, Pastor Weekly Prayer meeting, Thurs day night Missionary Baptist Church Services the 4tli Sunday' in every moi th, morning and night. Rev. T. R. Owen, Pastor. Primitive Baptist Church Services first Saturday and Sunday of each month at 11 o'clock. Adams' Hotel, corner Main and Pitt Sts. O. F. Adams, Proprietor. F.XPKES. Southern Express Otliee, on Main Street, closes every morning at !J o'clock. N.'M. Lawrence, Agent. PROFESSIONAL CAUDS, POWELL, Attorney and Counselor at Law, TARBORO', Ar. C. frg- Collections a Specialty. " Office next door to the Southerner oiiice. July 2, 1S75. tf JOS. BLOUNT CHESHIRE, JR., ATTORNEY AT LAV, AND NOTARY PUBLIC. ttp" Office at the Old Bank Building on Trade Street. je25-tf. H OWARD & PERRY, Attorneys and Counselors at Law. TARB0R0', N. C. Practice in all the Courts, State and Federal. nov.5-1y. II. JOHNSTON, Attorney and Counselor at Law, TARBORO', N. C. Attends to the transaction of busi ness in all the Courts, State and Federal. Nov. 5, l&To. ly F REDERICK PHILIPS, Attorney and Counselor at Law, TARBORO', N. C. Ef Practices in Courts of adjoining coun ties, in the Federal and Supreme Courts. Nov. 5, 1875. ly 7" ALTER I WILLIAMSON, ATTORNEY AT LAW, TARBORO', N. C. IVil! practice in the Courts of the Judicial Distri-.t. Collections made in 2nd any part of the i.taie. Office in Iron Front Building, Pit Street, rear of A. Whitlock & Co's. Jan. 7, 187G. tf JACOB BATTLE, Counsellor and Attorney at Law, ROCKY MOUNT, N. C. Bt7 Practices in all tLe State Courts. March 24, 1S70. ly J II. & w. L. THORP, Attorneys and Counselors at .uaw, ROCKY MOUNT, N. C. PRACTICES in the counties of Edge combe, Halifax, Nash and Wil on, and in the Supreme Court North Carolina, also in the United States District Court at Raleigh. DR. E. D. BARNES, Surgeon Dentist, ITIiliu Street, TARBORO', N. C. All work warranted to give entire satisfaction. feb.l8-if. Dr. G. L. Shackelford, DENTIST, TARE0H0', N. C. Office opposite Adams' Hotel, over S. S. A'ffs Co's Store. ')wing to the stringency of the times, I iave reduced my charges tor all operation to a standard that will not fail to suit every one. Care of children's teeth and Plate work a specialty. Satisfaction guarau cd iu all cases. March IT, 1370 ly. MISCELLANEOUS. CENTS iHwiU writ for Circulars for new bftfakl Jinnkihza Young; WIFE No. 19. The grand incceii of the year. 3Qth fhotiand lo preu. Full Expose of Mormonlsm nl Polygamy, a Wo man's Story told in full. Introductions by John B. COUgh nd Mrs. LWermOre. Bran new, with nearly 200 illustration. Po not engage with any book until yoa hare if en our ItlnstraWd Circulars, showine larpe tales. Sent free to m. DUSTIN.CILMAN & CO..RIchmond.Va BOYS AND MIDDLE-AGED MEN train ed lor a successful stait in Business Life at Eastman. College. The oldest, largest and only Institution that gives an Actual Busi ness Practice. Currency and Merchandise usL-d have a eal value. Each day's transac tions hased on quotations of New York Mar ket. New Buildings. Rates low. Graduates assisted to situations. Applicants received any week day. Refer to l'ntrons and Grad uates in nearly every city and town. Address ior particulars and Catalogue of 3,0W) Gradu ates in Business. II. G. EASTMAN, L L. D., l'oughkcepsie, N. Y. ta? 1 O !l at nome- Agents wanted. J Outfit and terms free. TRUE fc CO-, Augusta, Maine. AGENTS WANTED ! Medals and Diplomas Awarded for AOLMAV3 NEW PICTORIAL IHBLE. ' 1,00 illustration. A.J. HOLM AN Phila. Address for new circulars, & CO., 1130 Arch Street, FREE TICKET To Philadelphia S: . From anvnnint in II. S. east of Ilfjih, KflfJF5T5 Above R. R. Ticket (it also ad- rV&ti I Vf mits to Centenuial O rounds) nr.' yiii cash a day easily earneu canvas-sing fcfoui naner. niturR. At Anvb-Kiv can da it. 3 r- -r ' r , . . ' . . r ramcuJars free. JSena a'.arees on iostaicara. j oreceivp copy oi paper also, scna bets. Aa- S&i J HE ILI-CSTRATED W KEKLY, $Tlh ale and Female in their own lucul- drcss P. O. VICKEUY & CO., Agusta.Mc. 85 to 820 M ,r at home. S.implos m rth jrt- STIXSON A; CO., r land, M:-.ine. MIM) READING, PSYCHOMANCY, FASCINATION, Soul Charming, Mes-ni'-ri-ni, r.nd Marriage Guide, showing Iioav either sex may fascinate and gain the love and allettion of any persbn they choose iu stantlv. 4u0 pages". Bjuail 5Ll ets. Hunt & Co., ll!'. 3. 7th St., Philadelphia, 5 Wife or without Portable Hot V.'ater Reservoir and CloseL With all latest improvements. Largest Oven and Flues. Longest Fire B:x for long wctrf Ventilated Oven, Fire 3ack and Fire Bex Bottom in. sures a Quick, Scet and Even Eakc and Roast Swing Hcsrih and Ash Catch. Won't soil fioor or carpci. Durable Double and Braced Centers and Ring Covers. Burns but little wood. Has Kica or Solid Iron Front. Carefully Fitted Smooth Castings. No Old Scrap Iron. Nickel Plated Trimmings. Tin Lined Oven Doors. Ground and Silver-like Polished Edjes and Mouldings, Heavy. Best New Iron. Won't crack. Manufactured by RATKEONE, SARD &. CO., Albany, N. Y. JSolU bu an Enterprising Dealer in every Tow W. G. LEWI3, Agent, Nov. 12, lST5.-6ui. Tarboro', N. C. GEO. S. HAWES, MANUFACTURER AND DEALER IN riTiii, Copper AJfD m JLi 1 lllUi Tctrboro9 mil. C FULL LINE OF COOKING, HEAT 1. ing, Parlor & Ofllce Stoves, Kept constantly on hand, which will he sold at the lowest cash prices. R00FK6 AXD GVTTERIXG either in town or country, promptly attend ed to and on reasonable terms. of all kinds in his line exeeuted with prompt ness. If you can't afford to buy a new stove brin your old one and trade. GEO. S. HAWE3, Nearly opposite Post Oiiice. Ful). 1, 1S70. ly- TO iUUMJMia&lIil OF EDGECOMBE AVD AD J0HIM1 COUNTIES, I have just received afiesh stock of Setc for l7o, such as P0TAT0E SEEDL1XGS, Picked EARLY AXD LATE PEAS of all varieties. Cabbages, Collard , AND ALL OTHER KINDS FOR THE GARDEN. A'so GRASS AND HERB SEEDS. At A. II. MACNAIR'S Drug and Prescription Store. Tarboro, Jan. 28, 1876. tf ACORN COOK. MISCELLANEOUS. AUSTIN' J. WHOLESALE k RETAIL Prices Low Down for Cash I'W Acent for PETER'S AMMONIATED DISSOLVED IiOXE, pi euared expressly for Cotton. uiar.24-ly. L. WRENN Manufacturer of and wholesale dealer in CARRIAGES, BUGGIES, FARM WAGONS, CARTS, WHEELS AND AXLES, HAR NESS, COLLARS, 1IAMES, SAD DLES, LA PROBES, HORSE CLOTHING, WHIPS, Also a large Stock of Carriage Materials. Nos. 14, 16, 24 aud 20 Union Street, Norfolk, Va. A RARE opportunity T UIE STOCK OF GOODS OF M. Weddell & Co., WITH THE Good Will of th& Business, 13 OFFERED FOR SALE! and the Store House can be leased for ONE OR MORE YEARS. This is one of the oldest and Best &03.c3.s IN THE PLACE. Apply to SI. WEDDELL & CO. Tarboro, Dec. 17, 1S75. tf IN GROCERIES AND FINE LIQUORS. THE undersigned respectiully call the at tention of the citizens of Tarboro and surrounding country to their stock of Groceries, Liquors, fk,c. Family Flonr of all Grades, CHEAPEST IN TOWN. A large lot of Coffee, Hams, just received and for sale at Wholesale and Retail. FLOIR A SPECIALTY. Bargains unsurpassed. Capital limited. I deal strictly on the CASH basis, therefore can give unsurpassed bargains. Call before you purchase. S. WOOLARD & CO. Feb. 25. 1875. 6m. NOTICE. im J. i i ITETISHING to close my mercantile bust J T ncss, I will sell the most of my stock of goods now on hand, amounting to about fio.uuo, FOR. CASH. Parties wishing bargains would do well to call soon aud supply themeelves. I would also sell on accommodating terms, my STORE AND LOT, in this place. The store is new, large and well built, and one ot the most conveniently arranged tor business of any storo iu the State. The stand for business is all that could be askd for. Parties wishmg to purchase can communi cate with me at this place. J. H. FIPPEN, Feb. 4.-3m. . Whitaker's, N. C. GEO. L. PENDER, Bruffi Faulkner & Co. Wholesale Dealers iu Foreign and Domestic Dry uoqU, Aotioiis & white GOODS. 275 W. BALTIMORE STREET, J. e. Ruff, i Baltimore. A. B. Faulkner, - n. R. Hallett, ) novl9-ly. 5 (inxbota 0Urrur- Friday, : : : May, 5, 1376 a MonnAH court mn, HOW THE NAME OF "MOTIIEH" SAV ED A LIFE. OM Job Dawson ha J been duly elected to the responsible position of justice of the peace, and this was the first case that deaiauded his at tention. Job was a veteran moun taineer, and had hved in the shad ow of the lofty peaks, hunting, trapping and fighting Indians, to me his own -words, "Sense Adam war a kid." In that rough region an accusation of a great critae against anyone is but a forerunner of a "hanging bee," and a trial is seldom thought of. Cut in the present instance, a wild 'cuss' who had been frequenting the settle ments, had beeti appropriating a 'broncho' (7ndian pony) belonging to a neighboring ranchman, and had been pursued and brought back. Old Job was summoned to try the culprit, and a spot in the rocky gulch near the squire's cabin wa3 selected as the site for the investi gation. A motly crowd of hunters, trappsrs, miners and ranchcrors were present. Seme were lyin on the ground and others sitting upon the rocks, all anxiously awaiting the squire's coming. Job soon came from toward the cabin, and with dignified air seated himself upon a boulder, took off his bear skin cap, and said : 'Fellers, the court are ready to git dewn to biz, an' I want yer all to cheese yer racket and let up on that chin music according to law. Throw yer hair ;ht, tnd pay tentien to th3 court. Every hat came off at this com mand . and his honor glancing a roand the circle, said : 'Whar is the dam cuss V Three mountaineers armed with Henry rifles and sir-shooters, ster - ped forward with the thief, a young man wearing a bold, devil may-care expression. His hands were se curely fastened behind his back with ("buckskin thongs. Clad in buckskia from head to foot, he presented a picturesque appearance as ho. faced the squire. 'What do yer call yer when yer at home ?' asked the court. 'Aint got any home leastways in these parts,' sullenly replied the prisoner 'Aint hey ? Well, what's the the name you tuk states then V w'en you left 'The boys hyar on the hills call me Tiger Jim.' 'Yirell, Tige yer spotted a boss thief, ah I reckon thar's something in it, or the boys wouldn't a brought you in. Zou can't expect a tony trial like you'd get doAVn to Lara mie or eny of them towns along the road. We haven't eny paper, pen3 or ink, or eny of that sort of fool ishness up hyar in the hills, an thar aint one of U3 could engineer them if we had, so we'll just grind yer through and do the best we can for yer. In the name of the law I now ask yer did you collar that hoss but stop'er right thar, doggone it, I forgot to swar you. Cum mitey near forgitting it. Hold up right hand !' 'Hold up nothing. How kin I when they are tied titer'n blazes !' ' Ihat s so. ler k rect, iige, but guess eny member of the body will be cording to law m extreme cases. Steddy him a little fellers, so as he in hold up his right foot. Tige raised his moccasion-covef- ed foot, while a guard on each side held him in position. 'Now, then, I aint a fly on them ar lawyers attydavys, but 1 11 make her enough to Aiexicau mule. Tige im, do you swear by the Zoly Moses, according to laws of Wyo- niing lerntorry, that every time yer chip into my racket ye'll give us a square truth ? An ef yer don t do yer hope that yer may get chaw- ed up by a grizzly, chopped to pei- 1 . ce3 oy oioux, strung up to pine with a rope around yer neck, an tail to connect on heaven w en yer ngnt goes out, to tne Dest ol yer understanding a3 provided by law, s help yer Uod, eh : That s jist wa 1 1 does, pardy. 'Now, Tige, yer under oath, and ev ry time yer speak yer want3 to hit the bull's eye. Did yer hear that boss t Wall, Uncle Job, there's no use of lying 'bout it, and I'll tell iist how it war. Last night you know thar war a iamboree over to Al. Milkin's ranch in Miller's Gulch, and I war thar. Al had bin in La- rime city, and got a keg o' good old budge and we all got purty full. liter aancinsr war over, i nuiiea out fur Bowie's ranch, whar I am - i i hanging out, and as I war stagger- ing down round Mountain Cat Hill the broncho that war mcketed out in the orass. and war list drunk enougn to mount him k. . . . o 7 r: and lite. I know I'm eoinrr to swin? for it. and I'll die j?ame too. I aiat wort a cuss, anyway, and it warn't for my good old mother back in the states f here the tears began to roll down Jus bronzed cheeks) who never closes her eyes 'thout praying God to send me back to her, I'd laugh at death and help yer fix the ropo ; but when I think of that darling old soul I get weak er than a wounded antelope, tell ye, fellers, I've been a tough cuss ever since I struck out for the hills and s'pose the world will be better 'thout me in it. My old mother'll suffer, I know that, for I'm her on ly ki J, and hev sent every ounce I could spare to her and its all she had to live'on. She's bin good un to raej God bless her, and I'm sor ry I hevn't lived so'? I can camp wittr her up thar (raising his tear ful eyes toward heaven) and boys, won't some o' you write to her. Tom Kirk thar, knows whar she lives, and tell her I got let out by an Injun, or pegged out naturally. For God's sake dost let her kntw I was strangled. Tli6 news' ud kill her. But then, I'll cheese this gab or ye'll think Tm weakening and the man don't live as can skeer Ti ger Jim. Elevate me boys jist as quick as ye please, I'm ready when ye arc.' During this recital Jim's eyes were filled with tears, and a close observer would have detected 'silent weeping' on ail sides. The word 'mother' had awakened tender recollections in the breast of every one of those hardy mountaineers. Men who could face death in any shape without a particle of feeling did not try to hide their tears at the mention of that sacred name, mother ! How sweet it sounded to their ears ! It carried them back to the happy days in the dead past, whsn they blessed with the love of parents, before the insatiable thirst for gold led them into these moun tain wilds. Not a word was spken for a few seconds, and then old Job drew his herny hand across his wa tery eyes and said in a husky voice: 'Tige, ye w'udn't break an oath, would ye V 'No, Job Dawson, not for friend or foe. There aint a boy in the hills as can say thet Jim ever went back on his given word. I am a rough un, and do some mitey mean things, but when I sa a thing you can gamble every dollar you've got upjn it being straight.' 'Wall, Tige, we had intended to swing ye, an' ye deserve swinging, but I can't git rid of that 'mother' chinnin' ye gave U3. I 'spect the old lady set heart on seeing .ye a gain, and is wearing her old eyes out looking fer yer. I've got an old mother myself, and though I hevn't sot eyes on her since '49 her pictur's right hyar in my heart a pleading for yer o'd woman, Tige. its ruff Tige, ruff, an' let's see yes darned ef I don't du it. Jack, cut them strings so's he can git hi3 hands loose. Thar, that is it. Now Tige, hold up yer right hand and ef ver ever swore strong do it now. Do yer swar by the great God and yer blessed old mother thet ef this court discharges ye, ye 11 lite rite out for the state3 and go hum to tho old lady, an love her as Ion? as she stays out of heaven 1 this Titrft. before almio-htv God and this court ?' 'I do. Jna. and thar's mv fist on it. I swar it, and 1 11 pull stakes rite owatr ' 7 - - - - 'Th-n vou re released on them terms and the boys will help ye git vtr trans down to the station : but mind, 1 tell ye Tige, ef ye're ever caught in the hihs again ye'll go up a tree, idlers, the courts over and the prisoner's discharged. Marion County (Cal.) Journal. A Description of Christ. The following interesting literary curiosity was found in Rome some years ago, and is worm repuDiica- tion : public lentuiuhis letier to the senate of Rome c one ernina Jesus Christ It beiair the usual custom of tno Roman Governors to advertise the Senate and people of such material things as happened in their respec- tive provinces : In the days of Tib- erius Caesar, and Emperor, Publius, President of Judea, wrote the fol- lowing epistle to the Senate con cerning our blessed fcavior. Conscript Fathers. Jesus Amabills. There appeared in these our days, a man of great virtue named Jesus Christ who is yet living among us, and of the Gentiles is accepted as a prophet of Truth. He raiseth the dead, and cureth all manner of diseases. A man of stature some- , what tall and comely with a rever- end countenance, such as th be- holders may both love and fear, iiis hair is ot the color ei a chest- nut full ripe, plain to the ears, whence downward it is more Orient, curling and waving about his shoulders, in the midst of his hair is a seam or partition alter the i ' i manner oi tne razanies, ma iore head plain and very delicate. His face without spot or wrinkle, beau- tinea with a lovely red. Mis nose and mouth so formed as nothing can be reprehended. i?i3 beard I taickish, m color like ni3 nair not very long but forked. His look, innocent and mature. i7is eves, ef gray, clear and quick. In reprov ing be is terrible. Courteous and fair spoken, it cannot be remem ' bered that any haye seen him laugh; , . .., but many have seen him weep. In proportion, his body most excellent, his hands and arms very delectable to behold. In speaking, very temperate, modest and wise. A man for his singular beauty sur passing tho children of men. S0323 S::3n:rioitio3 of Crartslnp- 'Probably there is no instance in wnich any two lovers have made love evactly in the same way as any other two lovers, since the world began. Sir Arthur Helps. Barkis insinuated. Viv ien charmed3Icrlin. . Aleia&der'fiaSvr -2 i&aSre ft?' Thais. Ilildergarde took the bull by the horns. Tho Merchant of Venice sof t soldored Portia, with a casket of lead. The garrulous female in the Ara bian Nights told her husband stories. Victoria sent for Prince Albert and told him she waatad him. She was victorious. In the Polynesian Islands they win their hearts by beating their heads with a shillalah. Harry the Eight and Bluebeard were off with the head of the old love before they were on with the new. Dr. Johnson poked the tobacco ia his pipe dewn with his sweet heart's linger a warm token of affection. Tristram did it mostly with a harp, and was also a good li .-. His two Isoldes were too many for him. Bothwell was inclined to Mane, and locked her up in a castle. It worked as well as Peter's pumpkin 1 ii sueii. Dobbetl's wife caught him by the race with wnica sue used lier wash tub. She was never known to use it after the wedding. Tarn liomily, the famous lawyer killed himself because his wife died, while a good many others kill them selves because they won't die. Nicholas of Itussia wanted to pop the question at a dinner table, but didn t like to be caught at it, so he imbedied a ring in a lump of bread and handed it to her. Charlemagne's secretary was caught by a snow storm sparkling the Emperor's daughter at midnight and she carried him horns oa her back, so that his foot; tep? dn't De traced, ine jumper r heard it and saddled him on the rest of her lift?. to her foi A $200,000 Hots kat Dr. Pierce is Doinsr Am Iuipa.- taul liitei pri.se We learn that Dr. R. V. Pierce, proprietar of the "World's Dispen sary," in this city, has perfected the purchase of a large lot of land, on whic'a he -proposes to erect a large notei ior tne accommodation ol his numerous patients, earning hither from all points of the com pass. The land purchased by tue enternrisin? Doctor 13 234 feet front on Prospect avenue, runnin through to Fargo avenue, 332 feet; w , ,. r also an adjoining lot extending irora the above Connecticut street. It is in the midst ot our extensive sys tem of public parks, front3 the old ana Deauuiut rrospect, xarn., is uuu a snort distance irom tne "ircie in one direction, and the "Lake Front" in the other. The site se lected is a fine one being both beau tiful and healthful : is one of the highest portions of our city, easily accessible, yet sufficiently retired to secure quiet, ahd commands a pleasant view of the lake and river as well as the surrounding city and country. We understand than it is tne intention of Dr. Pierce to crec a hotel at the cost of at least two hundred thousand dollars, where those who come to enjoy the be- iit of his treatment may find all desired accommodations under one roof, instead ef being scattered over the city, as at present. We are given to understand that our archi tect3 will be invited to submit plaus for the proposed structure without delay. Newspapers School teacher, who had been engaged a loag time in nis profes- sion, and witnessed the influence of a newspaper upon the minds ot family and children, write3 a3 fol- I m lows I have found it to be a universal fact without exception, that those scholars, of both sexes, and of all ages, wno nave access to newspapers at home, when compared with those wno have not, are : l. iietter readers, excellent m pronunciation," and censequently read more unaerstanaingiy. - . xuey aits uc tier speuera ami define words with ease and accuracy, 3. They obtain practical know ledge ot geograpny in almost nait the time it requires or others, as the newspapers have made them acquainted wita tne location ot tne important places, of nations, their governments and doings on the - globe. 4. They are better grammarians - for having become so familiar with I every variety of style3 in the news papers, from the common place ad vertisement to the finished and classical eration of the statesman, they more readily comprehended the meaning of the text, and con stantly analyze its construction with accuracy. 5. They write better composi-. tions, using better language, con taining more thoughts, more clearly and more correctly expressed. G. Those young men who have for years been readers of newspa pers are always taking the lead in debating societies, exhibiting a more extensive knowledge upoa a cL-yyar:ety of subjects and ex pressing their views with greater fluency, clearness and correctness. A Healthy Fr33 Luncher. A tramp while on his travels noticed a placard in front of a bar room. It bore the pleasing legend. 'Free Lunch,' and he walked m, walked unostentatiously up to a plate and commenced perations on a sandwhich; then the bar-keeper walked up to the cadaverous wretch and said : 'Men who eat here are expected to pay for a drink.' 'I know it,' said the tramp. 'Well then, why don't you form to the rule.' 'Cause I go in for health, don't drink till I am through ing.' con- and The bar-tender turned his for a moment, and tho tramp slip ped three sandwiches into his coat pocket and calmly devoured four; then he walked up to the bar, and to the dispenser of stimulants hus kily whisptred : 'Gimme a glass o'water, will ye?' 'What ! water after four saud wliiches ?' said the bar-keeper, angrily. 'YesV replied the tramp. I have been a drinking o' it for nigh outer forty years, and its just the healthiest stuff a going.' And he hobbled out; but if he had caught the boot that flew after him he wouldn't have been satisfied with the 'booty' of his visit. He Wasn't There. The baby who wasn't at the Un ion Fair was at the Post Office in his little bugv yesterday, says the Free prees. He was a baby with a snag-teeth, yellow hair, white eyes, and an ugly kick to his heels. A pedestrian tried to pat hiai .on the nose, and the young generation struck at him and howled diseonso' lately. A boot-black pinched his foot, and the baby kicked right and lett and maue the covers Uy. 'lie wasn't at the fair, was he t inquired one of the boys as the mother came out. 'I guess he wasn't net much,' sue answereu. 'lie was nome mind 1 11T 1 1 ag his business.' 'Then he didn't get a golden ea gle r 'lie didn't get nothing, sae snap ped. 'i don t put my llesU and blood on exhibition for no golden rles, or gulden geese, or goldcr anything else.' 'But he'd have taken the A. I, O ., XXX premium if you'd had lim there,' persisted the boy 'lie s just as good as he i3 hand- - i i i some, she roniieu, as sue tucked the clothes down. 1 have been told over and over again that he is the handsomest baby in Detroit 'Would you sell him t seriously inquired the boy. 'Sell him: Why, what would you do with a baby V 'i'd paint his nose, dye nis hair, whittle out seme good teeth for him, trim his ears down, and then sel lim for a tobacco sign,' whispered the boy. This is why a woman was yester day seen chasing a boy around the Post Office square, always just near enough to get in a kick, but always jnst an instant too late to hit tne spot. When a policeman stopped her she had both hands clenched, her eyes flashed flre,her teeth were hard set, and she gasped : 'Take mythGuse and lot, but let rue get hold of that boy '.' Ths Burial Swlndlw- The Hartford (Con.) Times Mid- dlotown correspondent, referring to the frauds reported to exist in con nection with the burial of the sol diers who died during the late war, and to tho published stories of mu tilation of bodies, says : -but 1 have a worse story, as told by a sub-sontractor in this locality, who was engaged in the business. This sub-sontractor says that straight line3 a mile in length were given by surveyors to the contractors, whose business it wa3 to place the headstones. In placing the head stones, it was found that in order to keep them ia line, the stones would te placed on the breasts in stead of at the head of the bodies, and it would therefore be necessary to break through many of the cof fins. The contractor says that the expense was greater to dig through wood, and the government there fore paid him for all such cases $20 extra, over his contract. At this point the fraud which had been practiced on tho government in the burying ol dead bodies by former parties was brought to light. In brehking through the coffins, instead of finding the remains of some soldier, leg3 of mules were found in huadreds of instauces ; and tc-day headstones, which are sup posed to mark the last resting place of some dead soldier, stand but as monuments to the remains of mules. Household Words. Along about bed time the De troit wife says she'll go to bed, and aer husband yawns and goes down the hall. After half an hour ha joins her up stairs, and she sleepily nquires : 'Did you bolt that side doer V 'Yes. 'And the back door V 'Yes., 'And you fastened that cellar door V 'Yes.' '-dnd did you put a brace under the I ob of the hall door? 'Yes.' 'Sure that all tho windows are nailed down V 'Yes.' 'I'll bet the window in the spare bed- oom is un.' 'No it isn't.' 'Did you see if the blinds of the pantry window were fastened ?' 'les,' 'Well, put your revolver on the chair, leave a bright light, and, if you hear a burglar in the room, for heaven s sake don t wake me up. for I know I should scream risrht out.' lloodv and a Heek-Lookinar Peni- tenr. A few days ago a meek-looking, penitent man went into the inquiry room at the Hippodrome in New York, where the most wonderful revival of the world, is progressing. ne intense sorrow and overwhelm ing humility of that mourner, touch ed the heart of Mr. Moodv. and the great revivalist knelt bv the side of the sinner in prayer, but while the minister prayed, the peni tent wate.ted. They both arose; the meek-looking individual, as he passeu out ot the door, looked corns forted, and carried out a timepiece tha' had not entered with him. The minister as he felt for his watch a few minutes afterwards, looked very moody and was heard : 'Beware of pick-pocket3 ! I have been ta ken in, and my watch taken out !' Two Kinds of Girls. There arc two kinds of girls. One is the kind that appears best abroad tho cirls that aro traoi for parties, visits, balls, etc., whese chief chief delisrht is in all such things. The other is tho kind that appears best at home the girls that are useful and cheerful in tho dining room, the sick-room, and all the precincts of home. They differ widely in character. One is fre quently a torment at home; the other is a blessing. Ono is a moth consuming everything about her ; the other i3 a sunbeam, inspiring life and gladness all along the path way. Now it does not necssarily follow that there shall be two clas es ot girls. The right modification would modify them both a little, and unite their characters in one. 'Maria Theresa Jennings and Clotilda Semantha Jenning, gim me that are book ? The idea of gals not more'n nineteen readin' all about that are Beecher scandal. And you professors, too ! Ef your poor mother was alive now, what do you calkilate she'd say? Gim me that sinful pamphlet till I des troy it.' And the pious old deacon indignantly took 'The Story of the Great Scandal' from them and eat up till three o'clock in the morn ing reading it in dining-room, with tho door locked and his hat hung over the keyhole. Twenty-five thousand dollars will be offered for the dead body of the man who wrote the folio wing poem. "If I was a lokle editor, Wouldn't I have a time ? I wouldn't print a cussed word For lessen a $ a line." "I'd get my grub and licker free, c5 tickefs to the buows, I wouldn't pay f ortmggy bier, & wouldn't I wear good close J" . 'Veil,' said an honest Teuton, throwing down the morning paper and having a long sigh, 'dot beats all. Dere vos Beecher, und Bab cock, und Belknap, und now dey got Bendleton, too. Geefs 'noder glas3 lager, boy. Visitor Can I see Dr. Jones ? Ser vant No, sir ; he's not at home, sir ! Visitor Could I see his er depu ty ? Servant Please, sir, you'd better wait till master comes home, as I don't know where it is, and he don't like his things meddled with. If your geraniums don't flourish, jast graft them upon tomato vines and see how that works. A Los Angeles man tried it, and his gerv anium, or tomato it's hard to tell which -is growing thriftly, ana b!o33oraing beautifully. A Chicago clergyman preached from the text, 'Where are the nine?' The Post replies. 'Most of them arc with the Haymakers. Hi