Newspapers / The Charlotte Post (Charlotte, … / June 21, 1984, edition 1 / Page 27
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1 -,vCarolf^ Our Son And Ife Wife ’w -.v-T; Dffli’t Want Any Children? Dear Carole: Our son and his wifrf of two years have just told us that they do not want to have' any children - ever. We are heart broken. Since our son is an only child we’ll never be able to become grandparents. This is so unfair. We feel angry, hurt and "• helpless. We’ve talked and— talked to them but they say we’ll • never understand their rea sons. They’re right! We don’t understand. We think they are being very selfish. ’ They say that their jobs and each other is all they have time for. We told them that they will be sorry when they growsolder. They say it’s not our decision. We don’t know what to do next. Do you have any advice for us? “Hurt Parents’’ Dear Jlurt Parents: It is understandable that you have strong feelings about the decision your son and his wife have made. You are especially disappointed about their deci sion since your son is an only child. Don’t judge them harsh ly because they have made a choice that is different than^fthat you expected and hoped f$r Support their lovefor you andWir each other. And try to actfgpt their decision. Gibrap writes ip “The Prophet:” your cmiaren are not your children. They are th£ sons and daughters of life’s longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you. You may give . them your love but not your thoughts, For they have their own thoughts ...- You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.” Carole Dear Carole: My husband’s parents live close by. They’re just a 10 minute drive away so we see them quite often. That’s what makes the situation so bad. We - - - - . - i-I}-;.'. Ju.' j disagree with the way they play favorites with our children. One of our sons is of a lighter complexion than our other "son and daughter. Mama and D^d seem to give more attention to our lighter son than they do to our other son and daughter. They play favorites in small .....ways. But .we notice it and now . it’s causing problems among the children. We don’t want any of our children to think they are better than their brother or sister. We think the grand parents are very wrong by not treating the children equally. They tell us they love the chil dren the same but their actions tell us differently. My husband and 1 think that talking about this situation to his parents hasn’t helped make things better at all. What should we do? - ~ Dear T.S.: •**-* «^C4 V Try talking to your parent# again. This time, explain to them that you have to protect the emotional well being of each of your children. It is important for each child to feel wanted and accepted regardless of differenc es in color, abilities or other factors. Tell your parents how their treatment of the children affects their relationships with each other. If your parents continue to create a situation which causes problems that you cannot accept, you may need to make some changes. Those changes can be in the form of fewer and shorter visits. Carole Editor’s Note: Carole B. Ricks, an M.S.W., A.C.S.W. social worker, has a private practice in Charlotte as a counselor. She is featured in “Carole’s Corner” Mondays and Thursdays at 7:30 and 9:30 a.m. on WPEG radio 98-FM. If you have personal adjustment, parent-child or mar riage problems that concern you, write: Carole’s Corner P. O. Box 37107 ■ Charlotte, N.Q. 28237 .‘ - *’-v*. Dreams Don’t Die” Is Wednesday Night Movie ureams non I Lne, a hard-hitting story of teen age love and survival amidst the harsh realities of the urban combat zone - a world that has spawned the child criminal pushing drugs and getting rich - airs as “The ABC Wednes day Night Movie,” June 27 at 9 p.m. on WSOC-TV, Channel 9. Starring are Ike Eisen mann, Trini Alvarado and Israel Juarbe. Paul Win field is special guest star, and James Broderick makes a special appear ance. “Captain Kirk" is the drug pusher, chauffeured around, Contemptuous of authority, confident that he is above the law. He is not old enough legally to pilot his Fleetwood Cadillac through the rubble-strewn ! streets of Ridgewood, Brooklyn, but just young enough (under 16) by drug statutes to sell his white powder with im punity. me worse mat can nap pen to Kirk is he may be hauled Into family court, lectured to, and have his hand slapped before an underworld lawyer re claims him so that he can resume his illicit business. With his 16th birthday fast approaching, Kirk must find a younger suc cessor. He recruits Teresa. He likes her style. She is pretty. She is poor. She has no roots. She is dazzled by his big talk and, with her dream of escaping the ghetto, becomes easy prey. Teresa is in love with 17 year-old Danny Baker, a subway graffiti painter of extraordinary raw talent. He is respected and recog nized by all the other sub way painters - most of whom work in cliques as “King of the Line.” Seeing his “art” on a subway train as it rolls by on elevated tracks is Danny’s idea of fame. One night, Danny ..is nailed by Banks, a black cop (Winfield), who rails against the vandalism of the “white boy writer.” And yet Banks is im pressed with the young ster’s talent. He takes him and Teresa to a museum where graffiti-like works by a famed French artist are exhibited and where Danny can appreciate a more useful direction for his ambition. A warm surrogate father-son rela tionship is formed. Banks, the dedicated cop, believes in working the streets and making people’s lives better and making the mob uncom fortable. This makes him a prime candidate for ex tinction_in the eyes of Captain Kirk’s own lord of the underworld, Gavin (Broderick), and so Kirk is encouraged by Gavin to get rid of Banks. Kirk, hoping to prove he is capable of a criminal responsibility and to avoid “retirement” at age 26, hires a kid killer to fi nish off Banks. The de veloping events provide the final motivation and dra matic thrust of a gritty urban drama inspired by real-life reports. GET SMART! J GET BRILLIANT B ] GET THE POST UTi Its Cheaper To Keep Her \ PROFESSIONAL RESTORATIONS " TOPS ARE OUR SPECIALTY" We Repair or Recover any Vinyl, Leather or Cloth....on the interior of you car.... Regardless of Condition.... FRII ESTIMATES CLIFF & SON UPHOLSTERY 2627 NTryon ST. at 30th Street ooc r\ ACr\ Itchinc! United Automotive brother ELECTRONIC OFFICE TYPEWRITER EXECUTRON 70 i PER MONTH/ ON APPROVED LEASE Algxattftgr’g . OFFICE SYSTEMS \ 5237 ALBEMARLE RD. 568-7090 • 8K Memory • 16 character display • • 10, 12, 15 and PS pitch e Daisy wheel printer • 500 character correction memory • plus all standard electronic features
The Charlotte Post (Charlotte, N.C.)
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June 21, 1984, edition 1
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