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12 Friday, September 1, 2000 Cdisems or comments about our coverage? Contact the ombudsman at ombudsmajxa'unc.alu or caß 933-4611. Kelli Boutin EDrrORIAI. PAGE EDITOR Kim Minugh UNIVERSITY EDITOR Ginny Sciabbarrasi CITY EDITOR Board Editorials Smoke Screen The "new" seating plan for the lower level of the Smith Center is little more than an elaborate rearrangement of the old one. Another season of basketball hysteria is right around the corner, but don’t pack up the binoculars just yet. It seems that not much has changed with the highly touted “new” seating arrange ment, which was supposedly going to bene fit the students. Two hundred additional seats will be allo cated to students in the form of stand-only bleachers behind the home basket. But these seats come at a price. The cries for better seating were galva nized after the rousing defeat of Maryland on Jan. 27. Carolina Athletic Association President Tee Pruitt embraced the cause immediately, and after months of saying a change would happen, he has cut a deal with Director of Athletics Dick Baddour and Educational Foundation Vice President John Cherry that attempts to appease the students. Granted, Pruitt was genuinely concerned and acted on the voices of the students. But he was not able to facilitate the kind of change most students wanted. While the plan is indeed different, its noth ing more than a rearrangement of the old seating plan. The bleachers are turning out to be the only positive coming out of this whole ordeal. These standing-room only platforms Bad Taste’s Poster Child PETA's use of New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani's likeness on its anti-dairy billboard was insensitive and inappropriate. The People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, which is known for pulling outra geous stunts, recently scraped the bottom of the protest tactics barrel. PETA’s new ad in protest of the dairy industry features a huge billboard with a pic ture of New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani with a milk mustache. Beside the picture, a spin-off of the popular “Got Milk?” slogan appears that reads, “Got prostate cancer?” Last week, PETA spokesman Bruce Friedrich said French Advertising, the Wisconsin company that put up the bill boards, would take down the ads because PETA had not received Giuliani’s permission to use his likeness in the campaign. No mention was made of the fact that the ads were simply tasteless to begin with. PETA’s members obviously have not allowed their flaunted “ethical treatment” mantra to extend to their fellow man. Poking fun at people with a serious illness, even if meant to create awareness of a poten tial health threat, will not increase support for any cause. In fact, PETA’s tactics probably turned off people who already were sympathetic to the cause. Giuliani should sue PETA for using his likeness in such a crass and offensive ad. Not only was his face used illegally in the ad, but Barometer Buyer Beware II You know the parking situation at UNC has gotten out of hand when students are willing to hand over S3OO cash to a sketchy figure in a BMW to get a spot. Can anyone say "build more parking decks?" Sweaty SAAC A campus group called Students Against Air Conditioning was sup posed to protest this week but never showed up. Wonder if it was too hot for them? Tar Heel Quotables “There will be lighting and and security people throughout the night as soon as Duke Power puts back our electricity.” Tar Heel Parking Owner Giis Mueller How comforting. Makes us want to run right out and give the guy S3OO cash for a spot. • “I’m looking for a fun place. That’s a place where you can drink beer without being scared.” Soldier Mike Varozza So long as there's a police state in Raleigh and the ALE reign here, you'll have to go elsewhere for that, Mike. M att Dees editor Office Hours Friday 2 p.m -3 p.m. Kathleen Hunter STATE N NATIONAL EDITOR T. Nolan Hayes SKIRTS EDITOR Will Kimmey SKIRTSATURDAY EDITOR constitute all the extra student “seats.” However Brave Tee and his bureaucratic buddies might think they are, they shouldn’t expect a barrage of thank-you cards. This mighty scramble has resulted in stu dents being more spread out than before, in an effort to provide more noise throughout the arena. To do this, students have lost their front row seats in sections 109 to 115, trading them for parts of sections 102 to 106, the area behind the visiting team’s fans and some seats near the visitor’s basket. In other words: This new plan certainly will not inspire the overwhelming excite ment shown on that snowyjanuary night. This plan was presumably going to be the medicinal cure for the cancer of apathy that has plagued LINC basketball games. So long as student courtside presence is limited, the illness, unfortunately, will remain. Students, your tenacious commitment has not paid off. So stock up on tissues and get the climbing gear ready. But do not forget that you can still show your spirit from afar. It’s time to create a game-time atmosphere worth praising - despite the disappointing compromise of the CAA, athletics depart ment and Educational Foundation. there also is no doubt that much emotional distress was placed on the mayor as a result of the personal attack. And the emotional impact of the ad extends far beyond the mayor. Apparently PETA forgot that Mayor Giuliani is not the only prostate cancer suf ferer in the country. Many of the other hun dreds of thousands of men coping with this cancer, along with all other cancer sufferers, were most likely greatly offended as well. Think of what a cancer patient or his loved ones felt when they drove pastlhis billboard. There is a reason why slogans such as “Snap, Crackle, Pop - Arthritis” aren’t gen erally used in issue advertising. Most caring, reasonable people know using a debilitating disease as part of some catchy one-liner is irresponsible and wrong. PETA doesn’t have the right to protest what it believes to be the physical abuse of animals by emotionally abusing another human being. The animal rights group likely will learn a costly lesson for dragging both Giuliani’s name and that of cancer sufferers alike through the mud. The next time PETA has issues with an industry, it should avoid bombarding the public with insensitive and offensive garbage. Big Disappointment Tee Pruitt might say he's pleased with the "new" student seating for basketball games, but even he has £% to know deep down that stand-only risers for 200 is hardly anything to cheer about. Get Outta Town ... or stick around and enjoy some football. Whatever you do, have a fun Labor Day, and when you're having fun, watch our for the ALE. “(People) think this is a kind of program they want for their children.” OCCONEECHEE COUNCIL EXECUTIVE Director Tom Dugger On the Boy Scouts of America. Closed-minded and discrimi natory: the perfect atmosphere for impressionable minds. “We truly believe in fighting for the issues important to North Carolina. We ... feel we can really win the state on those issues.” Gore Spokeswoman Ellen Mellody That is some astute political analysis, Ellen. Got any more words of wisdom for the aspiring politicians out there? Opinion ah' ilmUf aar Mtti Established 1893 • 107 Years of Editorial Freedom www.unc.edu/dth Jermaine Caldwell EEATURES EDITOR Ashley Atkinson ARTY & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Carolyn Haynes COrY DESK EDITOR V N NV. yt-ixV'Aty 3 ‘HfiOitG Huge Hummer is No Small Package The following is an excerpt from the 2000 Hummer Owner’s Manual: The AM General Corporation wish es to congratulate you on your purchase of a new or used Hummer and cordially welcomes you to the Hummer family. You are now among a select group of inse cure men who, in an effort to compensate for an undersized genital situation, have shelled out a sum of money equal to the GNP of New Zealand in order to purchase a vehicle that will somehow make your sorry life worth living. Congratulations. Briefly, the history of the Hummer you have just purchased goes something like this: In 1979, the U.S. Army drafted a document outlining its requirements for a High Mobility Multipurpose Wheeled Vehicle, or HMMWV. The AM General Corporation was awarded the contract for production in 1981 and has, to this day, remained the manufacturer of the Hummer, a vehicle that has proven vital to the efforts of U.S. military personnel and Latin American drug lords. It was only a matter of time before the Hummer’s extraordinary powers were called upon by the nonmilitary sector. In 1991, after its crucial Gulf War role of destroying targets that the U.S. Air Force repeatedly missed, AM General made the Hummer available to the public. Since then, the number of Hummers pur chased by private citizens worldwide has sky rocketed to six. Now you can add yourself to the list of happy Hummer owners who wouldn’t trade in their vehicle for anything short of a Sherman tank. The Hummer’s unique capabilities make it a perfect fit for just about everyone. Whether you’re a work-at-home anarchist, an on-the-go soccer mom or a Montana militiaman with a larger supply of firearms than the Teddy Roosevelt Museum, you will soon discover that the Hummer is the vehicle for you. Before driving your Hummer, take a minute to review the following notes concern- Readers' Forum UNC Football Fans Need to Show More Spirit at Games TO THE EDITOR: I’ve seen a whole lot of Carolina football in my first four years here. Being a member of the Marching Tar Heels meant going to every home game and a handful of away games as well. Getting to travel to other stadi ums in the ACC and beyond for Carolina football opened my eyes to a glaring truth: As football fans, we could improve. So here are some ideas I hope you’ll ponder if you’re planning to come cheer on the Heels this Saturday. Wear your team colors. Death Valley is a sea of orange. We are a sea of khaki and Abercrombie earth tones with some Carolina blue sprin kled in. Everyone should wear as much Carolina blue as possible. Don’t be too cool to have some school spirit. Leave the airplane bottles at home. If for no other reason than to experience the heartiness of a classic college football game, a simple and Sefton Ipock PHOTOGRAPHY EDITOR Cobi Edelson DESIGN EDITOR Saleem Reshamwala GRAPHICS EDITOR .. - 1 ~ ■ ■ JOE MONACO TRAILING AT THE HALF ing the features, maintenance and operation of your Hummer. The windshield and windows of your Hummer have been specially designed to pro tect you and your passengers from wind, rain, ultraviolet radiation, sniper attacks and most forms of nuclear assault (for more informa tion, see “Caring for Your Hummer During All-Out Nuclear Holocaust,” page 22). Your Hummer is equipped with a revolu tionary, state-of-the-art roof rack and over head mounting system. This rack can easily support your favorite fishing pole, water skis and up to three surface-to-air missile launch ers. Remember to always mount fragile or breakable items behind the missile launching units. Your Hummer comes with a 25-gallon reservoir, while averaging a practical 3.4 miles per gallon. Do not worry about the preposter ous amount of money it would appear you will be paying for gasoline. Simply refer to the map of the Middle East on page 17 of the owner’s manual and select an OPEC nation you would like to take over with your missile launching Hummer. This should alleviate all gasoline-related concerns you may have. In the event that all oil-rich Middle Eastern nations already have been seized by other Hummer owners, feel free to raid NATO nations that you don’t particularly like or Canadian oil tankers at port. The towing capacity for your Hummer is a hair under 452 tons. Therefore, you can safely tow aircraft carriers, small suspension bridges and entire portions of major metropolitan wholesome pleasure. At UNC, we have countless opportunities to get drunk. I don’t think abstaining for three hours on a Saturday afternoon is going to spoil anyone’s fun. The referees will make bad calls. Get over it. Be courteous to fans from other schools. They just want to support their team, same as you (and they’ll be wearing their frickin’ team colors). I think most of us here at Carolina are pretty nice folks. Don’t misrepre sent your school by trash-talking to fans from elsewhere, obnoxious as they might be. Be positive. Sure, I’m pissed when a guy with a full scholarship drops a pass in the end zone, but calling him names won’t help him catch it next time. Maybe I’m a sucker, but I honest ly believe those guys are doing every thing they can to win, and doing it under pressure few of us have expe rienced. Come early. One of the coolest experiences of my life was marching into a packed house for the 1997 Florida State game. It was electric. But most of the time, half of Kenan Stadium is empty for kickoff. Get Cate Doty & Lauren Beal MANAGING EDITORS Josh Williams ONLINE EDITOR Brian Frederick OMBUDSMAN areas. Remember to check with town officials before moving historical monuments. Your Hummer comes equipped with a Sta Cold Air Conditioning System. Whether you are taking the kids to Denny’s or leading a U.N. peacekeeping force through Bosnia- Herzegovina, the Sta Cold system will keep you cool and comfortable. Rear break lights do not come with your vehicle because, quite frankly, your Hummer will incur absolutely no damage if rear-ended by a car, garbage truck or Jurassic Era Triceratops that has mistaken your bumper for a T-Rex. In addition, the driver-side machine gun ensures that other drivers obey the rules of the road and conduct themselves properly within a two-mile radius of your Hummer. Take, for example, a hypothetical situation similar to one we’ve all encountered at one point or another. There’s an elderly gentle man in the left lane who, for whatever reason, believes the speed limit on 1-95 South is the same as it is in front of Rolling Hills Elementary School. It soon becomes painfully obvious that flashing your headlights is not getting the job done. He’s not moving over. You can be sure, however, that firing a few rounds into the trunk of the old geezer’s Grand Marquis will make him take off like Earnhardt at Daytona. In the event that Grandpa is also packing heat, you can take comfort in the fact that nothing short of an atom bomb is penetrating the rugged, yet stylish, shell of your Hummer vehicle. Finally, remember to always use warm water and a mild detergent to wash your Hummer. Anything stronger will cause the paint to fade. Again, welcome to the Hummer family. Your genital situation is still small. Joe Monaco is a junior journalism and mass communication and political science major from Long Island, N.Y., who drives a ’97 Ford Taurus. E-mail him at jmonaco@email.unc.edu. there for the band’s pregame show- Sing along with the national anthem. Clap during the fight songs. And when it’s time for kickoff, make lots and lots of noise. Lasdy, stay to the bitter end. Believe me, I know that’s incredibly hard when we’re down a few touch downs to Furman, but I stayed and it didn’t kill me. If you are going to call yourself a Carolina fan, I think that means supporting the team in wins and losses. None of this stuff is going to make the football team go undefeated this year. And of course I realize that the stu dents are not all or even most of the fans at Kenan. But we’re certainly the most important fans at Kenan. All I want is to have the best college football atmosphere in the ACC. I think that’s a realistic goal. See you at the game. I’ll be the one in blue. C. HTiif Blount Graduate Student Music Education The length rule was waived. aiju Saily (Ear Hppl © A The Daily Tar Heel wel comes reader comments and criticism. Letters to the editor should be no longer than 300 words and must be typed, double-spaced, dated and signed by no more than two people. Students should include their year, major and phone number. Faculty and staff should include their title, department and phone number. The DTH reserves the right to edit letters for space, clarity and vulgarity. Publication is not guaran teed. Bring letters to the DTH office at Suite 104, Carolina Union, mail them to P.O. Box 3257, Chapel Hill, NC 27515 or e-mail forum to: editdesk@unc.edu.
Daily Tar Heel (Chapel Hill, N.C.)
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