FRIDAY, MARCH 11, 195$
PACE TWO
THE DAILY TAR "HEEL
The University's
Ragged Orphan
Gordon Forester is a man with a com
plaint that should be taken up by the whole
student body.
Forester, president of the Graham Memor
ial Activities Board, had this to tell the Leg
islature's Complaints Board this week:
Graham Memorial is so far behind the
other two schools in the Consolidated Uni
versity in not only the physical plant but in
the allocation of finances that it is impossi
ble to present an adequate program or to
hire a- professional staff to carry out this pro
gram. An) body who has seen the plush student
unions at State and WC knows the truth of
that statement. Both are show places; both
have stimulating, live-wire programs; both
have become centers of student life, student
"unions" in the best meaning of that word.
But not here. Graham Memorial, stuck
away in a corner of the campus, is never vis
ited by most students. And if it was, it would
burst at the seams.
Compare sizes: Neither State nor WC are
as large as Carolina; but their shiny new
unions are each twice the size of ours.
Compile budgets: At State, it's $20 per
student per year;; at WC it's $19; here it's
$0.
Compile programs and services: Both
State and WC offer year-round, stimulating
vies, games, concerts. Both have spacious
lounges, auditoriums and snack bars. Gra
ham Memorial, through Director Jim Wal
lace is making the best college try in its his
tory, just doesn't have the budget to provide
more than a token program.
Graham Memorial was built in 1932 to
"serve 2,000 -students; and two-thirds ' of the
architect's plan was never constructed. Its
fee to students among the very lowest in the
countrv. Our student union is a ragged, star
ved orphan of the University which includes
two of the flashiest, most successful student
unions of which American colleges can boast.
With the state's coffers empty as they are,
we'll have to wait many years for a new stu
dent union. But the fee gap is one that can
be bridged now.
With a reasonable budget, Graham Me
morial could hire a professional staff and
convert itself into a real student center; no
body who has seen what has been done at
State and WC will say it shouldn't be done
here.
Termite D'oeuvres
Add signs that Chapel Hill is evolving out
of the village category: A note in The Cha
pel Hill Weekly that such worldly delicacies
as french-fried grasshoppers and worms, bar
becued muskrat, termite eggs, alligator soup
and canned snails are on the counters down
at Fowler's Food Store.
"Excellent for serving with cocktails," says
Fowler's.
Gracious Living XXV
The Saunders-Murphy-Law School horse
shoe, we hear, is softly scented, these Indian
Spring days, with Japanese cherry tree per
fume.
But the Graham iMemorial-Battle-Vaqice-Pettigrew
end of the campus is enjoying no
such sweetness, even with blossom-laden cher
ry trees well within perfume-range.
The GM groundsmen, more excited about
the blossoms to coine later than the blos
soms here now, have dumped a well-known
plant catalyst in the surrounding flower
beds to the nose-wringling distraction of us
Graham Memorial slaves, the ruination of
our pure, melodious March, and the abject
embarrassment of Gracious Livimr in Chapel
Hill.
fje Bail? Zat sec!
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Carolina Front,
Answers For
A BA Major
& Ben Bobrow
Louis Kraar
THE BUSINESS major came
up after class, and he looked
angry. "How
much money
does the paper
get from the
students?" he
a, a n. t e dj to
enow.
I explained
f to him that it
varied from
year to year, depending on the
size of the student body and
the generosity of the student
Legislature.
"Well, it seems to me if stu
dents in the BA School help pay
for the Tar Heel, you would
represent them," he said.
I explained that the editorial
column of this paper does not
attempt to simply mirror what
students think. I tried to go on
have so many varied opinions
that it would be impossible to
"represent" them in the editor
ial column.
Letters to the editor repre
sent student opinion, columns
represent individual sudent opin
ion, news stories report student
opinion but the editorial col
umn is the opinion of the editor.
And this is the way it should
be. .
"WELL, WHY does the Tar
Heel crowd think they can tell
me what courses to take?" my
BA buddy wanted to know. "I
took a course in Milton, Chau
cer, and Shakespeare. And if I
had to take more of that stuff,
I think' I'd leave the University,"
he added.
Actually, no one has tried to
tell sftidteiits what courses to
take. On the other hand, most
business majors "simply don't
realize what they're missing.
Literature? No. it probably
won't help you make a sale or
be a better accountant. But most
of the qualities of a man that re
appear in every age are there.
It's just a study of life, some
thing that even a business man
could enjoy.
History? This field, no doubt,
won't spark one's executive abi
lity in a big corporation in just
one semester. But here again is
the study of all the things men
have done. Not only that, but
you can see what mistakes they
made.
I could go on in this manner,
but actually this would only
make BA majors think that I'm
telling them what to take.
K
Stie- of (hr nWttA
NiM-ih VWolmi '
hith Jirtt ' i
' wetted tt tecw
, -
Editor
CHARLES KURALT
Managing Editor
FRED POWLEDGE
Associate Editors
LOUIS KRAAR, ED YODER
Business Manager
Sports Editor
TOM SHORES
B ERNIE WEISS
News Editor
Advertising Manager
Circulation Manager
Subscription Manager
Assistant Business Manager
Assistant Sports Editor
Photographer
Jackie Goodman
Dick Sirkin
Jim Kiley
1 Jack Godley
Bill Bob Peel
Ray Linker
Bdyden Henley
Night editor for this issue
Eddie Crutchfield
A PROFESSOR in the Eng
lish Department has perhaps
found the key to the BA major
problem.
This professor had a student
who showed little interest in the
required Milton, Chauccfc- audi
Shakespeare course. After the
course was over, the professor
asked the student would he rec
commend that his friends take it.
"I sure wouldn't. I'm a bus
iness major. What do I need to
know this for in business?" the
student asked.
The professor now adds: "Per
haps, I should have told him
that while he is a business ma
jor, he's also still a person."
WHITE SUPREMACIST Ben
s nett Bobrow wrote in yesterday
wanting to know how the can
didates for editor feel about ra
cial segregation.
Speaking for this reporter, I
can say simply that the U. S.
Supreme Court has ruled that
racial segregation in the pub
lic schools is unconstitutional.
As a citizen of this country, I
am eager for us to abide by that
decision.
If Mr. Bobrow thinks that we
can buck the Federal govern
ment because of our narrow
personal prejudices, let him join
me in my History 113 course
this Saturday at 11 o'clock in
room 213 of Saunders Hall.
Together we'll take a look at
a South that was crying out in
the manner of you. If you do
show up, you'll find that tluj
South lost. And so did the country.-
(
T REMEMBER CHAPEL HIL
Hawks App
I e jock: 11$
Dr. Archibald Henderson
I remember, as vividly as if it has been
yesterday, my journey Irom Salisbury, N. C.
via University Station, Blackwoods (half-way
point), and Carrboro, to Chapel Hill.
On alighting from the train, traveling
from Greensboro to Raleigh, I found Uni
versity Station not even a "wide place in the
road." The railroad station, if I am not mis
taken, was a boxcar, holding a few chairs
and a cast-iron stove at one end.
Arriving in the morning, say 9:30, there
was a long wait for intricate shifting, all
conducted by Captain Smith and Brakeman
Snipes with stentorian shouts and sweeping
gestures which would have done credit to
field marshals under the Emperor Napoleon.
A most delightful character with ruddy
cheeks and broad smiles was Engineer Nes
bit, who remained cheerful under all circum
stances, even when some parts of his en
gine blew up, as occasionally happened.
There were just one passenger coach and
as many as two freight, usually flat, cars to
this "Lightning Special", as it was jocularly
named by the collegians. At the end of this
car was a pot-bellied iron stove, which in
cold weaher was stoked up until it was red
hot. At this time, the president of the Uni
versity was a brilliant, capable man, Dr.
George Tayloe Winston, who in f his many
public controversies always seemed to come
out on top. Captain Smith once told me that
the only time Dr. Winston lost out was when
the red-hot stove fell on top of him and
knocked him down!
To' Dave Kelly'
On arriving at Carrboro, the din of the
competing jehus was deafening. My attention
was particularly attracted by a colored
humorist commonly known, and invariably
called by himself, "Po' Dave Kelly". By thus
humbling himself and so enhancing the self
esteem of the collegians, he won warm af
fection and wide popularity. He was wearing
a black, long-tailed coat known as a "Jim
Swinger", a black broad-cloth coatNslick and
turning green from old-age, discarded "by
some aged member of the faculty.
Po' Dave was driving a barouche of ante
bellum vintage in which the ladies of the
village used to drive around the race-track,
near Carrboro, on pleasant afternoons. This
"hack", as it was called, was drawn by two
horses, so spavined and raw-boned that it
seemed as if, at any moment, they must sink
to the ground of sheer inanition under the
operation of the law of universal gravitation.
Po' Dave was standing" up in the barouche,"
holding the reins high and shouting in
gratiatingly: "Come on, young massas, ride
with Po' Dave. You'll have to hurry though;
cause it's just about all I can do to hold
these colts!"
On the drive of three-quarters of a mile
to Chapel Hill, one's attention was attracted
by two conspicuous houses, Professor Toy's on
the left, and Dr. Hume's on the right. Pro
fessor Toy was head of the Modern Languages
Department, and indeed, at that time, the
whole department. In manners, he was Ches-S
terfieldian: the glass of fashion and the
mould of form; and was a stickler for every
thing which was en regie.
On one occasion, he held a large reception
at his home (he was then a bachelor), even
ing clotSes being stipulated and the invita
tion cards bearing the legend "R.S.V.P."
From one student, Norfleet (nicknamed
"Hawks") Pruden of Edenton, he received
"regrets" card, bearing the legend, "H.H.N.C."
Some days later, Professor Toy, meeting Pru
den, inquired of him the meaning of the cryp
tic letters. Replied Hawks, "Oh, Professor; you
see, I had no evening suit. The initials ate
an abbreviation for 'Hawks Has No Clothes'!"
Dr. Hume, a Baptist minister and a man
of high culture, was head of the English De
partment and took a great interest in his
students, thereby winning a mournful pseud
onym. He seldom left his office before two
o'clock; and would stop to speak to the
English students on his way home.
He literally "buttonholed" these boys, hold,
ing on like grim death to that button while
he discoursed eloquently upon Shakespeare,
Shelley, Byron, Browning and Tennyson. His
wife, a beautiful woman several decades his
Beginning a new Daily Tar Heel series,
"I Remember Chapel Hill," in which distin
guished alumni will reminisce about their stu
dent days.
Dr. Archibald Henderson, who begins the
series, is a member of the class of 1898. A
world-famous historian and mathematician and
rfie official biographer of George Bernard Shaw,
he still lives in Chapel Hill, on Franklin Street.
junior, had a keen sense of humor. Because
the doctor usually reached home several
hours late for dinner, Mrs. Hume, greatly to,
his vexation, invariably referred to him as
"the late Dr. Hume."
'Don't Make A Sound, Oregon'
On reaching the center of town, one noted
the old Roberson Hotel on the right (site of
Battle-Vance-Pettigrew Dorm) and on the
left, the southwest corner of the present U.
- S. Post Office lot, the primitive post office
of that day, a little wooden shack presided
over by .a Mr. Kirkland, who was so gruff
that students were afraid to ask for their
mail. .
The proprietors of the Robeson Hotel
were Mr. and Mrs. A. A. Klutz, and Mr.
Kluttz, universally known as "Doctor" Kluttz,
owned the town's principal grocery store and
emporium of students' supplies. For a time,
he had a young white man to assist him; but
as .this proved unsatisfactory, he turned over
the management of the store to a clever col
ored boy, the late Ernest Thompson.
Dr. Kluttz, called by the students "Adam
Applejack," took no interest in the store,
and it was believed that he was notoriously
"bilked" by the collegians who ran up large
bills which proved difficult, if not impossi
ble,' to collect. It was said, at the time the
store "folded up," that there were $40,000
of unpaid bills on the books. Dr. Kluttz's
passion was not store-keeping but draughts;
and his invariable fellow-player, was Mr, Ore
gon Tenney (called Tinny) who gave the
name to Tenney's Circle. When a would-be
customer entered the store during Ernest's
absence, Dr. Kluttz, leaning over the check
erboard, would whisper to Mr. Tenney, snug
ly ensconced in an invisible cubby-hole at the
back of the store: "Don't make a sound, Ore
gon, and maybe he'll go away."
A quatrain, composed by a collegian, is
perhaps still remembered in Chapel Hill by
old citizens: - " ,
Ernest runs the business, ,
Doc chews cig-ar butts.
Everybody works in this old town,
But A. A. Kluttz.
The Fat Mutton Controversy.
The MacNider home, where the Post Of
fice now stands, was the site of the house
occupied by one of the early Stewards of the
University, Pleasant Henderson, who had
been a major of dragoons in the American
Revolution. He and William Gaston were,
said to be the two most popular men in
North Carolina; and on the death of Gas
ton, he was elected in his place.
He declined the honor, because the stu
dents had violently rebelled against an in
variable and unwanted diet of fat mutton;
and in the ensuing controversy, the Trustees
had sided with the students! The road run
ning north and south past the Poet Office
still bears the name of the irascible Revolu
tionary dragoon and incensed Steward.
I cannot conclude without mentioning the
most original and spectacular character in
Chapel Hill, whose barbershop, about where
Kemp's Music Store now stands, bore the im
posing sign:
THOMAS DUNSTON
Professor of Tonsorial Art.
Scarcely a week would pass that some
bright comment by Tom Dunston would not
circulate through the village.
Shortly after I entered the University,
Edwin Anderson Alberman, professor of his
tory, was elected president to succeed Dr.
Winston, who had accepted the presidency
of the University of Texas.
-President Alderman, a brilliant orator, was
. not yet well known throughout the nation as
an educator; and when he was invited to
speak at a great educaional gahering in Chi
cago, he became a recluse for the time-being,
devoting all his leisure to the preparation
of his speech. When he went to have his hair
cut, Tom Dunston, who was a great gossip,
could get nothing out of him. Finally he burst
out in great indignation:
Tom Quoted Petronius
"Marse Ed, what's got into you? I believe
you is going crazy. As Epaminondas said to
The Need For H-Bomb Information
Michael Straight
In New Republic
v The crew of Number 5 Fufc
uryu Marv, were not privy to the
topmost secrets of the Atomic fished along the northern edge
Energy Commission. They had of the Marshall Islands where
been fishing for tuna north of they did better.
Bikini Atoll, and they had bad In the darkness of March 1,
luck. So they turned south and , 1954 at 3:40 a.m., they noticed
A Cloud No Bigger Than A Man's Future
4
a reddish white flash that rose
from below the horizon in the
southwest. "Look," they cried,
"the sun is rising in a strange
fashion!" Three hours later a
fine, white ash began falling on
them.
APPALLING GAP
Captain Tsutsui suspected that
the ash was radioactive and
harmful long before blisters
broke out and hands began to
swell. He ordered up anchor and
started for home.
The Japanese fishermen, in
other words, did what nine out
of ten American farmers or fi
shermen would have done and
would still do today. Ten years
' after Nagasaki, 12 months after
the Bikini fallout, there is still
an appalling gap between what
Americans should do and what
they would do in the event of
a nuclear attack ...
But how can the public res
pond when it has no idea to
prepare for? Every bit of in
formation that the public has
gained has been clawed out of
the AEC. It is still not "enough
, information to serve as a guide
to action. Forty-megation bombs
are now possible. But Civil De
fense Instructions are still bas
ed on bombs of one-half me
gation size ... ,
NOT IN SILENCE
Among the- officials around
Admiral Strauss, secrecy retains
jts magic power. For the rest of
us the threat of nuclear des
truction is too awful to contem
plate; too vast to comprehend.
We turn in boredom and even
resentment from those who break
the silence.
Yet if there are answers to
these problems they will not be
found in silence. Disclosure and
discussion are needed to reduce
the disasters of warfare, and
to. reawaken concern in the al
ternatives to war. 1
DR. HENDERSON
... as vividly as if it had been yesterday.
Themistecles, 'Much learning doth make thee
mad' ".
Where Tom could have picked up- the
famous saying of Petronius, no one knows;
but at least the use of the names Empami
nondas and Themistocles was purely origi
nal. The only person known to' have got the
better of Dr. Winston was the tall, gangling,
knock-kneed, presidential mail-carrier, the
coal-black Henry Smith, affectionately known
as Horn-Handed Henry." One day, President
Winston, showing a group of Trustees around
the campus, met Henry, weighted down. with
parcels and letters, on his way to the I'ot
Office. Dr. Winston accosted him mischiev
ously: "Henry, I have seen you carry the biygest
loads of mail I ever knew anyone to .carry.
Why, I believe you could carry the South
Building down to the Post Office, it. you
tried. Do you think you could?" Henry.-with
the startled look he habitually exhibited
when spoken to, courteously removed his hat.
touch his forelock, as was his habit, and re
marked with blinding simplicity:
"Naw, Sir, Doctor. I couldn't carry the
South Building down to the Post Office-naw,
Sir not as it stands. But I could carry it
down to the Post Office one brick at a
time." -
A stentorian roar of laughter went up from
the highly amused Trustees, to Dr. Winston"
keen vexation and profound humiliatir-n.
YOU Said It: Editors
Write 'Finis7 To Feud
With Quarterly Critic
Editor:
In regard to Mr. E. E. Clarke's recent comment
on Bill Scarborough's criticism of the Carolina
Quarterly, we feel it necessary to state that we are
not in agreement with Mr. Clarke as far as any
deprecating implications on either Mr. Scarborough's-character
or his ability as a critics are con
cerned. In addition, we intend this statement to be the
concluding word to the exchange of criticism-;,
criticisms or criticisms, and criticisms of. those
criticisms which have appeared in connection with
the Quarterly during the past week or ten days.
Editors
The Carolina Quarterly
Legislature's Don Quixote
Editor:
This letter is addressed to my friends in the
Upper Quad.
When I went home last weekend my Old Man.
who had heard about the Daily Tar Heel episode,
said: "Frank, you can fight windmills all your life,
but for the Lord's sake don't fight a newspaper."
Wrell, I want to tell you all thai I'm not fighting a
newspaper. I'm just trying to see to it that you get
the most for your money. That is what you elected
me to the Legislature for. Your money, that yo i
pay in student fees, is what runs The Daily Tar
Heel, and when The Daily Tar Heel is not cover
ing your news, why then it is up to the Legisla
ture to find out why, and to see what can be done
about it.
Who covers the Phi and the Di? Who looks into
what is going on in the , Dormitories? And what
about the Fraternities over there across campus'
I'm not fighting The Tar Heel, I'm just trying to
get them to do their job.
Now what makes me mad is Charlie Kuralt's at
titude. As for his statement that I recanted the
bulk of my charges, I haven't recanted anything.
I modified one statement, I said you're ..possibly
lazy, Mr. Kuralt. Also Mr. Kuralt charged .that we
are trying to control thoughts. Personally I don't
care what he thinks. Far be it from the Jegis
lature to try to control anybody's thoughts We
just want him to make sure that the papers are
delivered in the mornings, and that thev cany the
campus news, I think Mr. Kuralt is patently absurd
Dean Luxon says that we are luckv with The
Daily Tar Heel. We are lucky. We have student,
like you, who pay good money to have a top-notch
So!?wer,.and b' damn' " the latJre i
help a oure going to have one!
Frank Warren, Jr.