ate SatUj (Uar Wmi Opinroas of The Daily Tar Heel are exprreu on it editoruJ par All unsigned editorials are the opinions of the editor. Uftrr at- tolumut rrprevmt only the opinions of the indrviduaJ contributor. Harrv Brvan. Editor '.Vednr-yjay, Novernber 10, 1971 Have yon learned, nothing, America? as-.K.jis" t! . ! ;!:.'. t ;. : J ; ;r '!: .:- .. Y'j ttl. !- v.orM ' tror.L'c-.t ti'i.': Vo . arc the rnii'litr.- !. th- ,.--':! t : ; ! : " T : r. 'i t h : '.: 'j , t i i i .. .. . a. V.!: A V. hat did s ou h :'. a U; !;i u,d V. he!i d.-.id . : to t; t a hse r.u.-ator. , ! r - r !o s a? A f hi Jlit k Si , .... , ..! :-;d ' V. jt to pros- ihat you h oc th; I apahlv ; . ! S ! . : t ! ' . . ' ' 1 ' ' Or s-.a, i ! :!.!:.:' i !': , ' v. a ! . 1 1 1 ' a ' ,- ! ar :. A of tii -rn all. I da 1 1 os i nv a n , . tho o!i! v. a , vour hdd day. merely ! . r.dle f'r pleaaure if -a - pi ode ' You never o i e -a; . to do with it a ' re s ' u '-"aim' to .. - rid u, a !oitm:.dit.' ohi it. cor.lidentiv A : a . r 4 1 ain't sot to say today, so.-' i;k r-o . ? v.. T tC .. Ui-t Hie aluN Daiii aar ttird Harry Hr an. Edit(jr Mike OriKl! Managing Ed. Doug Hall News Editor Lou Bond- sMjciate Ed. Lana Starne .... Associate Ed. Mark thicker Sports Ed. Ken Rip!e .... Feature Editor Jim la!or Night Editor Bob Wilson Business Mgr. Paddi Huches Adv. Mgr. Lou Bonds Mow I he selection of a chancellor is pretty serious business lor any institution to undertake. 1 mean there are so many qualifications chancellor-picking people must consider. Is the candidate educated (a junior high school education is usually the minimum requirement).' Do his political ideologies suit the administration (considering the candidate has ideology)? Does he dress well? Is he photogenic? Does he talk too much on television. Is he much fun at socials? Oh. by the way , what are his attitudes toward students and education'.' Knowledgable of the fact Chancellor J. C'arlyle Sitterson submitted his resignation last fall and probably will soon submit it again, I took the issue to heart and set out to discover who the Chancellor's Selection Committee will come up with to replace him. The committee is back at work after being ;r-J that '!h;r :: ;. ' hrir.;rs p-.-atc'.' you list-.-:; to -.or; r..at:o.: fears that earthquake . ti-i :l-v. as -ar.'I r-.iva of radi'o .to-: ! r. :vz result from our p!a ' I !. : tears did not ?..,::. : !r .'!. . Arnario:. hut v. -re so i sir; or .-, .-: s ou luskv '.' You say ou v. ill re tore la land tfie v.ay it v. as. Ho v. do . o . fill a i' an tic cavern her. eat h do land'' Yoj rnov. hov, to .r.-atc radioactivity, hut hov. do yo : t :k e it away. Au'en.a ' Does it matt.-r v. ou'.' Were there other v, ao 1- ; your knowleL'e of the atom .' ( o dd sou have used it as fuel in p'a.c o! uas. energy in place of e!etnots . or. perhaps improving a o.iets rather than destroying one ' Have ou learned any thine :ru:u your sJer.c-c. America ' Or have s u . learned nothme at a!! .' nothin He hcc:s : i r rr s i d i : - i i . win r.ct print is rroiriy rr.orc fitting, i He give the class a b:;vv.,::k assignment to keep theni too busy to complain. He makes unimportant thing important so he can talk about them for 15 minutes until the bell rings. And all the time students sit attentively - unless they've already walked out cr fallen asleep - and waste their time taking notes they'll never need. If they'd stop taking notes for just a second, they'd probably realize that they're wasting time even sitting in the class in the first place. If only the professor would stop talking long enough to think about what he's saying, he would perhaps see the inanity of it all. Maybe he would ask himself whether classes are being held out of habit or to provide a higher education for students who are paying more than S 2.000 a year for the right to come to school at this University. When you esteemed gentlemen of the faculty have nothing to say. why don't you just let us go home and co back to bed? do wot iriiDlfp, fR delayed by legislators who couldn't figure out what to do with the University. Fortunately, I was able to disguise myself as a trustee member (it wasn't easy to hide my enthusiasm and fein apathy). Most trustees are politicians. And most committee members are aspiring politicians. Anyway I had the opportunity to record some preliminary, heated discussions of the committee in their search for a new chancellor. "Well, here we are again, gang. Whooee! Them legislators had me scared. Jeez. I thought the committee was going to be disbanded for awhile. My whole political career wiped out. So much for that. I nominate Spiro Agnew for chancellor. Everybody agreed? Great. Let's go home." "Hold on a minute," another chancellor-picker said. "I don't thing tv U o-Jv D'Ater Outtion: M htzid that it h legal to ?3't ctrrtam drugs if you be 1 org to vor.t thurth dtr.ominition. h this true Sii-r-J. Vs Vs. . ... . J' . ' f. . . . . J . f . " '.it ddi-rer.t fro o'on 7r.-.-:t :s r.c - ' r- j J -, - - . - i- - 1 --4 - . i . . " eo.O " e.-o ,. The .c la-: liaiers it .; trart :s r.o cffi.til i. crgir.:7,iticr. :v h;-.c- r-.-;:r.!!y gven leza! r.e 'A r-: - within fh-rch. ir.d th:s v a. rr.c.T.h'tri cf the so ro'Uit in Te.. kr.i : :.. hy r.cr.dr.a-1 -.in Ch-r'.h : rev ;;:so . As re'.ir.tly cs - v.r.ter is cr:ir.2 in a me. Ni-.ar.o Irriian . J - -A. t The T 'A1 - peyrte wi;h: :n C nurcr. . ; 7 - - t- SuT THEN ACrU IF WE rvr2 &. PrM AT C TUP PrTo'RACi wOvUD M i NtCSOTIATc- Spiro will take the job until he finds out if he's on Nixon's '72 ticket. Heck, Women's Lib might start some trouble and then, byjimmmy. the whole issue of law and order will be up again. Besides, there's lotsa good condidates right here at this Great University ." "Like who f instance?" "What about Jim Cansler? Hell. Jimmy has done a great job as associate dean of student affairs. He knows how to keep those commies in line. Remember that visitation issue when the kids wanted to live together? Well, he told them. Said they wouldn't have to give up anything, they just weren't going to get any more. And by God. he meant it." "Granted. James is a good man," said a voice at the table's end. "But who would we replace him with? There's not another like him around. I personally think of Joe Lagies over there in the o-L- , T i ' - s-j i i i F" TkN) V -052) r.' ffatrs. loci! t-bil law is well as t: '.tt-'-ts istrrr-.e-.; th; lfgja: ::' -f- -Ve th:r the Nit:v; Ar.rur. Ci--r;h Tij -lies pir.:c-.?a::rr. :r. Ni:;-; :r. .ir. Ch -r . h c?r;rr. :r. ? tt:; ;:r -r - - J -. " ---?---; - t - , , v.. . - !...-.. Question: Aml Nitratf mat h.je some potential for abuse or it -oin t be a prrscription drug. But it dangtro-us under the conditions it is u-e-d for other than angina pectoris1 Hov, doe :t intensify sexual pleasure"' L'rog-.ed Dear lr. i.gr.e f : : - . n::ri!e. This d:-g i ro.e : V 3-- KiS i !-;.-. ' txter.d:r.z ro-: r.ir.v t:n S s e ' n c is "snip r :cs. : ratr:-.- . . e pj..igc - -T-t-.e , i -. . ..-r,-.'- i'cth. Thocc J.itnrz ercsh a -.iil b-et;cr. 'A.-::: inhale the f-rr.e-s te. r-. discomfort . it, J The c'fe-fi of tho jiof- -, rir:. ; :n j often prod-.e a re.:: .l Jr.-.- Letters to the editor Mismaimed concerts dull "I ) the editor : Mr. S.ott (1 l'y71 i refcrrei to us the drunken couple down hy the stige a ho hoord th: belated entrance of I - h He v,.r, correct about the h'-o-r.g. t ut entirely overplayed his hand -a hen he referred to i as drunken only t.'--.oTT-d with the mfunation of h ;-.!.- y 1 ! ar. evening of in con vernen ae and hoa at the mercy of an unorganized band of t.'raon elites who could use a httle train in;' :n management and a httle trior- envern f' : the thousand', of their peers who : ;ffere i through wand and ch.:! an j noise ur.. 10:40 Saturday night- I can t as-.Oi.nt f'-r the rest of the evening s.nse that was 'h. time I u!l finally entered an f w- left ' hut the real surprises of the e . were the thousands of r.aro..na O - ;.''' who put up with the . : she s-' .s without a whimper. I o the;'. e u; get what you derr i.:. a. : g. t : t , . . j . j . .... c - - - - ... Cir.'.ra s -'d brttr r... c : -. r SvRlY w ARX ENTITLED F "TO SoM Kf?Tih SUCH... UrAYETiTV AWRKT iMUt-pni v, (Hlh ;)!) (P,r1 business office is a good man. As a :ce chancellor, he'd be a natural to take over the chancellorship and students, too. lie's great with the kids. Remember how he took their student fees and put them a trust account"1 Darn near slipped it by them. He's a gcvd man for the job." An objection came quickly : "No. not Joe. He's too liberal. A liberal can't handle the job. How about Dean Cathey" "Nope, no television chanma. No radio voice. Gentlemen. 1 don't think we should rule out non-L'r.iv ersitv candidates. But rember. they have to know how to deal with students." "Julian AHsbrook." "No, Giles Cogens." "Don't forget Jee Helms, Great television personality." "Chub Sew ell. Jesse's buddy ." "Both of them. A bwhance!lcrh:p." too fare. :-:T?avf- "r-'.r.-'-ir P f iir -re: . - s ri" - f Question: My doctor gae me -;r;f diet puis last tsr hich helped great!) ith m weight problem Bat he ould only gje me a short sugph because he si id they could be habit-forming. hen I topped taking the puis, my eight shot up again. Do diet pills change your metabolism'' re the harmful' Do i r. t h e w i : gs far corrr.r.g l'r..' B,.h and Jar.e Ma Immediate ban on automobiles 1 o the editor- I'm writing about two matters of -rgent and excruciating importance. One a the number of automobiles in tha v..! we ill 'flare. Two is the quality of 'he aarnah-m found in the stuJent ' i I " ' " !or the f.rst matter - it is patently - 'a ;ne that there are just about r.s . - d too many automobiles .. ..... ..k ,,f i r S'.o.a. a ; nsre.ess ia mages. o ibs-l-:sl no yustification .( ( . - . . - . the u si e c f .-ac ;r.:-.: an automobile. The - :v v-.ould omrlv state that in -a. CJ 1rw Sit ftprsnn? "Come off it. fellas. N one of tha-e gays dresses worth a harg." "There's always J:m Gardner. He make a great hamburger And we all know his views on students. epecu!! b'ak Tudets "Naw. anybody that loses to Scatt ain't worth it. Besides I found a hair in my trench tries yesterday." "Hey. who was that guy at Kent State a couple a years ago' Supr. he's "Remember when Huey long appc inted that stationary salesman a chancellor of LSI' That wa the year they bu.lt so many b-ild.-gs they couldn't count them all. We!!. i ww when reporters asked ham what o.-?c particular building was. he thought am mute or two and sjid I hat's our aeronautics building, gentlemen' and dare. A thev d.dn't make it o: that I ntd then ,nii-"r miiiitt -immsmamim'mmmKxm''mmmmmmmmm"mm"'n mU'-am 'doctor at tJ IsfsTrr prevr.v -SrnH. M B. irtrt-a't TV-e arrphetie-e . r r"' -,-' -t a.v-. -!-ear: rat? ird h'xd prrv-e ;-et.--.at-:- asr.i r.tased i;f-'- . .. , - -t the 'o:e :';. .--kun':f ' - i'e.o rr e ta'"-s r. gr "" -i " 1 A ' r r " r r - - - - -e;: p ':er the drg ;o rr. --e:.r eerT ' :-:-. . " v e i e ! p ' a: the - -sgf O: ertiin c . . S - - . u r at s v , , .a nii - "he p.rkirg problem is solves . it .-.-r. plaints about transportati.-n r i from class are rooted in , .ni-mmtal artenosclerotic lassitude so: a. v. dismissed as S i i , As for the second matter The Ih;; . la; Heel should become a wee'a new-pap-er. It doesn't hae the talent ' produ.e consistently good journal on every day. In fact, this letter is probacy the only good thing in it today. Thank you. I'm serious about boh matter4. Alan P. Wiener 1 1 C, Tow ne House Apo Give employes a little vacation To the editor i I just finished reading Charles Hartmann's letter and I am glad to see that he appreciates the SS (student stores) and all that they do for him. I'll bet that he would agree with me if I said that we should show the SS hw much v,e like them. I'll bet they get tire J working all day the way they do at helping students. I'll bet they would he real glad if we gave them a rest. We could give them a rest by not buying anything there on a specific date; say on Monday. November 15. If no one bought anything there that day. then all the employees and managers could get all rested up In fact, maybe we could keep or. r.o buying things there until they felt that they had enough rest. Let's try it. To show the student stores hov. -a we like them, let's not buy thing- there for a while and give them a rest, starting on Monday, November 15. Robert H-er 501 Northampton I'".-- A The Daily Tar Heel accepts letters to the editor, provided they are typed on a 60-space line and limited to a maximum of 300 words. AU letters must be signed and the address and phone number of the writer must be included. The paper reserves the light to edit all letters for libelous statements and good taste. Address letters to Editor. The Daily Tar Heel, in care of the Student Union. 14 i '" v...".. ..XX!V they didn't know that it wa.s ecir. :; ' -That's the kind of quick thinking man -e i Vi . ell. the names kept coring and the debate continued. Different reasons v.--e given for least qualification and no, qualification But there w a- a requirement mtss-.ng to my m.r.d. Something they just weren't getting around to So using my d:sgu;e ts greatest advantage, ! rambled myoue to a sh drawl and said : Sav. what about somebody the students lAe. you know, someone they respect And admire" lc vo ces pound to a ha!:. Ncbody va d arMh,-f 1 though maybe 1 had givtn mwif aa and all eyes were cn me. SomcKv'v bad to break the ice. Sen rone r-f pot it IVe got it' COWBOY BOB

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