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6 The Daily Tar Heel Wednesday, October 26, 1977
Ben Cornelius, Managing Editor
Ed Rankin, Associate Editor
Lou Bilionis, Associate Editor
Laura Scism, University Editor
Elliott Potter, City Editor
Chuck Alston, State and National Editor
Sara Bullard, Features Editor
Ch Ehsslin, Arts Editor
Gene Upchurch. Sports Editor
Allen Jernigan, Photography Editor
85f7 year of editorial freedom
Science and satire meet
When the Food and Drug Administration banned saccharin last spring
after a team of Canadian scientists claimed it produced bladder cancer in
rats, most Americans considered the FDA's decision inane and downright
We snickered as we heard reports that told us we would have to consume
1 1 bottles of liquid sweetener per day for the rest of our lives to simulate the
saccharine-saturated diet of the Canadian rats. Newspaper columnists and
cartoonist poked a lot of fun at the researchers by creating new and fabulous
experiments based on the FDA principle and depicting bloated rats and silly
But it was not until recently that two scientists came up with an
appropriate satire on such large-dosage experiments. Dr. George E. Moore
of Denver General Hospital and his colleague, Dr. William N. Palmer,
announced in the August issue of the American Medical Association
Journal, "Money Causes Cancer: Ban It."
The two doctors, respected in the field of cancer research, produced
cancer in rats by placing sterilized dimes in a cavity of the rats' abdomens.
The two experimenters said their findings showed without a doubt that
federal officials should "convene an emergency meeting for the purpose of
removing all coins from circulation."
Later, removing their tongues from their respective cheeks, the
researchers admitted their purpose was to dramatize the "string of inane
pronouncements on cancer dangers" by the Food and Drug
Administration. They called the cancer-related policies set by federal
The Federation of American Scientists, however, did not seem to
appreciate the satire. In a recent newsletter devoted to the subject of "animal
ethics," the group ran an article entitled "Scientists Describe Pointless
Experiment." The article quotes one unnamed scientist as saying the satiric
experiment was a "misuse of cancer funds and of laboratory animals to
make a humorous point."
It is unclear whether Moore and Palmer used federal funds in their
experiment, but it is clear that many scientists have been locked in the lab
too long to appreciate good satire. Apparently the federation members
never appreciated Jonathan Swift or maybe they read him so long ago
they have forgotten what satire is all about. Satire is one of the best remedies
for societal illnesses ever invented, and it's good to see that at least two
scientists have lost neither their sense of humor nor their feel for diagnosing
and curing social ills.
Wolfe's magic feted in
Raleigh, not Pulpit Hill
"A destiny that leads the English to the Dutch is strange enough; but one
that leads from Epsom into Pennslyvania, and thence into the hills t hat shut
in Altamont over the proud coral cry of the cock, and the soft stone smile of
an angel, is touched by that dark miracle of chance which makes new magic
in a dusty world."
Destiny led a Tom Wolfe to Chapel Hill but led his enthusiasts to Raleigh
over the past two days,
St. Mary's College in Raleigh hosted a two-day "Wolfe Fest" Monday
and Tuesday, the third in as many years.
John Griffin spoke on Wolfe's S.C. relatives and his travel between
Asheville and Anderson, S.C. Writer Carole Klein shared anecdotes of
Wolfe's patron and lover, Aline Bernstein, the subject of her biography to be
published next month. Wolfe's nephew, Effie's son, a medical doctor, spoke
on the causes of Wolfe's death.
Fred Wolfe, brother of Thomas, Luke Gant in Look Homeward, Angel.
spoke yesterday of memories of his brother Tom.
Perhaps the most moving presentation of all was "The Search for the
Angel," a multimedia slide and music show produced by UNC grad and
former Yack editor Mark Dearmon. This presentation featured excerpts
from Look Homeward, Angel, to music and photographs of the western
North Carolina mountains that fenced in young Eugene Gant's mind, which
always sought the golden horizon beyond the hills that rimmed Altamont.
St. Mary's has a permanent exhibition which features copies of Wolfe's
manuscripts and photographs of all the persons important to Wolfe.
Throughout the festival, Wolfe's N.C. heritage was emphasized:
particularly his days as an undergraduate here on the Chapel H ill campus.
Pulpit Hill in Look Homeward, Angel.
Were it not for the Civil War, said John Griffin, W.O. Gant might never
have come South and the world might nev er have known Thomas Wolfe.
And were it not for St. Mary's College, and the admiration its faculty
holds for a literary giant we consider to be "our native son," the memory and
magic of Thomas Wolfe would not be as strong today, in a time when it has
been popular to disparage Thomas Wolfe as an "unreeeting" writer
The Daily Tar Heel
News: Tony Ounn, assistant editor; Mark Andrews. Mike Coyne, Meredith Crews. Shelley
Droescher, Bruce Ellis, Betsy Flagler, Grant Hamill, Lou Harned. Stephen Harris. Kathy Hart.
Nancy Hartis.Chip Highsmith. Keith Hollar, Steve Huettel, Jaci Hughes, Jay Jennings, George
Jeter, Ramona Jones, Will Jones, Julie Knight, Eddie Marks, Amy McRary. Elizabeth Messick.
Beverly Mills, Beth Parsons, Chip Pearsall, Bernie Ransbottom, Evelyn Sahr. George Shadroui.
Vanessa Siddle, Barry Smith, David Stacks, Melinda Stovall, Robert Thomason. Howard
Troxler, Mike Wade, Martha Waggoner, David Walters and Ed Williams.
News Desk: Reid Tuvim, assistant managing editor. Copy chief: Keith Hollar. Copy editors:
Richard Barron, Amy Colgan. Kathy Curry. Dinita James, Carol Lee, Michcle Mecke. Lisa
Nieman, Dan Nobles, Melanie Sill, Melinda Stovall, Melanie Topp and Larry Tupler.
Sportt: l-ee Pace, assistant editor; Evan Appcl, Dede Biles, Bill Fields, Skip Foreman. Tod
Hughes, Dinita James, Dave McNeill, Pete Mitchell, David Poole. Ken Roberts, Rick Scoppe,
Frank Snyder, Will Wilson and Isabel W orthy.
Futures: Pam Bclding, Jeff Brady. Zap Brueckncr. Amy Colgan, David Craft, Peter Hapke. Etta
Lee, Nell Lee, Kimberly McGuire, Debbie Moose, Dan Nobles, Stuart Phillips. Ken Roberts.
Tim Smith and Lynn Williford.
Arts and Entertainment: Melanie Modlin, assistant editor; Hank Baker, Becky Burcham, Pat
Green, Marianne Hansen, l.ibby Lewis, Ann Smallwood and Valerie Van Arsdale.
Graphic Arts: Artists: Dan Brady, Allen Edwards, Cliff Marley, Jocelyn Pettibone. Lee Poole
and John Tomlmson. Photographers: Fred Barbour, Sam Fulwood, Michael Snecd and Joseph
Business: V'erna Tavlor, business manager. Claire Baglcy. assistant business manager. Michcle
Mitchell, Secretary-Receptionist. Liz Huskey, Mike Neville, Kim Painter, David Squires and
Howard Troxler. Circulation manager: Bill Bagley.
Advertising: Dan Collins, manager, Carol Bedsolc, assistant sales manager, Steve Crowcll,
classifieds manager; Julie Coston. Neal Kimball. Cynthia Lesley. Anne Sherril and Melanie
Stokes. Ad layout: Evelyn Sahr.
Composition Editors: Frank Moore and Nancv Oliver.
Competition and Makeup: I'NC Printing Dept. Robert Jasinkiewic. supervisor; Robert
Streeter, Geanie McMillan, Rusty Baiath. Judy Dunn, Carolyn Kuhn, David Parker. Join
Peters, Steve Quakenbush and Duke Sullivan.
No University responsibility
Change may lead to proctor, not honor, system
By I. .. ISi:llDH
Editor's Sote: These remarks were made to the
Educational Policy Committee at an open hearing
Monday on proposed revisions of the Honor Code.
I am pleased to have the opportunity to address the
Educational Policy Committee of the Faculty Council
on the proposed plan to modify the honor system. I
know the Committee on Student Conduct has worked
long and hard on the plan and I am in favor of parts ol
it. However, I am shocked and disappointed by the
proposal to remove the requirement that students
report violators. II Proposal No. I is implemented, the
Honor Code will, in my opinion, have effectively been
put to death without a proper burial. To shift
responsibility to the faculty and remove it from the
student body and then claim we have an honor system
instead ol a proctor svstem is "Newspeak" worthy ol
George Orwell's l4'.
As much as any person on this campus. I want the
honor system to work. Many aspects ol the new plan
are good and represent a lot ol hard work on the part ol
the committee. But while this, plan does not mean to. it
removes the only chance we have to make the honor
system work and th? is to view the student who
does not report cheating as being in the same category
as the cheaters. T he concept that the faculty share in
ensuring academic integrity is already in effect
throughout most 'of the campus. For the
administration to make a real campaign to increase
this effectiveness would be very desirable. Suggestions
that penalties be increased seem quite appropriate and
may be effective also. However, how can we expect an
letters to the editor
already harassed, cynical and in many cases apathetic
faculty to take seriously the idea that the lull
responsibility lor student honesty should be shifted to
Furthermore. I find no reference (in the proposed
changes) to the University's responsibility. No,
statement has been made as to whether faculty
members w ill be supported w hen they try to work with
the system. Over the last three years, three members ol
my laculty have been the subject of abuse, harassment
and threats because they tried to work with the system.
When one of them sought backing from the University
he was given the standard run-around. The
committee's document contains statements on the
responsibility of the faculty, and the responsibility of
the students, but none of the responsibility of the
University. Unless the University is going to come out
and state unequivocally that it will support its staff in
the performance of their duties, the faculty at large will
never back any system in these modern, sadly litigious
I he drafters ol tfiis document are clearly sincere in
their desire to improve the honor system. But l most
sincerely believe that if Proposal No. I is implemented
we will have irreversibly and tragically -transformed
our honor system into a proctor system. If
this is to be done, let us admit our defeat openly.
I do not question the validity of the student surveys
that indicate students do not believe that the
requirement to report cheaters is being completely
effective. However. I do not believe this is justification
lor doing away w it h the requirement any more than the
popular conception that most people cheat on their
income lax is justification for doing away with laws
requiring accurate reporting of income. Rather, 1 think
the administration of the University and the faculty
should take a strong stand in favor of the honor system
and encourage students at every turn to get involved
and make it work.
For two years I served on the disciplinary committee
of a college of 23.000 students that had done away with
student responsibility and placed it on the faculty. I sat
on every case in the college for these two years. The
abuses seemed no less frequent and the student attitude
was even more cynical than what we have on this
campus. However, all the advantages and freedoms of
those who would practice the honor system were
missing. 1 think we are greatly in danger of throwing
out the baby with the bath water.
I urge the committee to recommend in favor of the
increased penalties and to consider modifying the
student court when that proposition comes forth. I
urge the committee to stand in opposition to
transferring responsibility from the student body to the
Finally, I urge the administration of the University
to take a strong and open stand in favor of academic
honesty; to promise support of the faculty and students
who will pursue it. I urge the Office of Student Affairs
to vigorously implement the honor system, and I urge
the faculty to work with the administration and
student body toward the goal of an open, honest
academic environment in which students can pursue
their studies and faculty, their careers.
T.L. Isenhour is chairperson of the chemistry
Professor demands nomore bullshit' on drop policy
To the editor:
Having attended the recent Faculty
Council meeting, I find the recent Tar Heel
editorial on the drop period appalling. 1
know several members of the Educational
Policy Committee, and they have never
impressed me as being "all-powerful" as the
Tar Heel has suggested. In fact, the only
power the committee has is to make
recommendations to the Faculty Council
and, so far as I know, they have never
exercised this power previously. 1 believe
that the Tar Wffeditorsarelackingeitherin
the will or the knowledge to interpret the
available data on the issue of the drop
period. Certainly the student body has voted
with its feet when no students appeared at
the Educational Policy Committee's open
meeting for students and only 30 appeared at
the Tar Heel's widely advertised meeting
following an editorial appeal. As to the
recent "systematic random telephone
survey," 1 do not understand how a survey
can be both systematic and random and I
question its validity.
The Tar Heel has repeatedly denied that
the purpose of an extended drop period is to
permit the student to drop a course if it
appears that he will not obtain as high a
grade as he might desire. Despite this denial,
the Tar Heel reports of panic dropping, of
having to make a decision before the first
quiz, and of professors feeling forced to give
a quiz before the end of the drop period. To
this I would repeat a popular student phrase
of a fewyears back: NO MORE BULLSHIT
Elliot M. Cramer
Department of Psychology
The Daily Tar Heel never held a
meeting on the drop period. We did support
and cover a meeting set up by the Campus
Governing Council. This meeting drew 30, as
you say, in spite of the World Series,
midterms and a poor meeting time.
The Daily Tar Heel was not the
perpetrator of the "systematic and random"
survey. None of our arguments were based
on this survey. Our ow n survey, completed
when the question of the four-week drop first
came up, was based on a valid model
prepared in the UNC School of Journalism.
We do in fact have both the knowledge
and the will. The editor of this newspaper
campaigned for his position. One of the
planks of his platform was opposition to the
present drop policy. He went door-to-door
talking to students for a solid month. The
sentiment was overwhelmingly against the
four-week drop period.
Your semantic quibbling aside, a
random sample can only be gained by a
scientific and systematic procedure.
We ha ve said again and again and again
that there is more to the drop decision than
grade consideration not that grade
considerations are absent. You prove once
again the council's only concern is
We agree with you that too much
bullshit has been coming down, to use a
current phrase, but nonetheless our
libertarian values require us to print your
To the editor:
There have been a few misunderstanding
about my recent Supreme Court suit that I
would like to correct.
I did not file the suit to enable the CGCto
immediately raise lees. The suit was filled to
solve a legal problem regarding referenda. I
am for a vote on raising fees, best illustrated
by my introduction of a bill to provide for a
vote on Nov. 16. 1 would oppose any effort to
raise fees without a vote by the student body.
Although I personally favor an increase, 1
will not vote for an increase in the CGC
unless a majority of voters in my district
(Upper Quad, Henderson Residence
College) approve the referendum.
Finally. I encourage anyone in my district
with any questions to contact me in Suite C
or at my room ( 105 Manly).
CGC District 13
Hs Met dtttt cm
Hi3 MtftflEr1 Mtf CATE
Abotf Ma Met...
The saga of the Noonies, among other things
Ik JIM PATE
Anyone familiar with the lost and
miserable lives led by those who have
admitted before the face ol God and their
fellow men that they have let marijuana foul
their lips persons like Frank Zappa. Will
(ieer and John Denver knows ol the total
deprav ity lhat pot can inject inio your soul.
Among our college-age children today,
the age group with the highest suicide rate,
marijuana is the third leading cause of
insanity, after masturbation and looking for
a parking place.
It has stolen into the lifeblood of our
intelligentsia in the dastardly form of
religious cult. I was but an innocent
freshman when the so-called High Noon
Society formally organized in Chapel Hill
and now. "Noonies," as members are called,
threaten every aspect of American life that
we hold sacred.
As many know from the national press,
Noonies have no minds of their own, are
forced to do the bidding of their leaders,
made to walk long distances without sleep
and smoke the Devil's mixture. All the
initiates return to campus ombie-like.
forsaking their family ties and forgetting to
call their mommies after class.
However. 1 was no leader, only a follower
and, to my good fortune, soon a backslider.
Before I renounced my convictions,
however, the Society assembled over 300
Noonies at the Bell Tower for thecelebration
of an international high mass, with faithful
attending from High Noon Societies in
Toronto, Ldinburgh. Tehran and western
Chatham County. My suitcmate. Era. who
had also been led astray, had composed a
song in his young zeal, which we sang belore
T he d.n ol the high mass, scores ol
photographers were on the roof of Wilson
Library, taking our picture, and some were
even so irreverent as to come in our midst
during meditation and prayers to takesnaps.
The Society's picture was splashed across the
front page of the Nuisance and Disturber the
next day w ith a feature story that began with
three verses from Ezra's song.
Ezra's momma and daddy down in the
sandy llatlands couldn't have recognized our
faces in the picture, but his momma picked
out her son's songwriting style instantly. He
got a phone call that day while several of the
faithful were sharing the Gospel in his room.
1 think I remember he lost interest in the
Society about that time. too.
There was a slight public uproar then
similar to the one experienced when the High
Noon Society had its recent revival. But
there was. sadly enough, nothing of any
significance to put a stop to this cursed
dread. . .and the fault for it all goes back to
the way we raise our kids nowadays.
My daddy has a second cousin down in
Bladen County who is a classic example.
Billy Wheaton still lives in the one-horse
town. Black Ankle, where he and my father
spent their boyhood together. Black Ankle is
pushed up against a dogleg in the Cape Fear
River by Ashpole Swamp (pronounced
"swomp" by the inhabitants). The residents
still are noted for the moonshine they make.
Folks say the community got its name
because every time one of the community
lathers went "downtown" to check his place
of business, his ankles were always black
w hen he came hack.
Billy VV i.c.itoit isa pitachci now, Uic only
suivivini! son ot a rumrunner, who. in the
.'lis. llltCsUl! .1 IllOvlllSililllll Un.uui III a
boat and began to bring Jamaican overproof
white rum from Port Antonio to
Wilmington and then up the Cape Fear
River to the wooded banks of his farm.
When Billy received word at the seminary of
his two brothers' simultaneous deaths in
Germany during World War II, he
reportedly said. "1 guess someone up there
must like me."
Dad told me vv hen he was visiting Billy as a
small boy. old Mr. Wheaton had caught
Billy's momma behind the barn smoking a
A lot of extraneous activity went on
behind the barn before the advent of the
Anyway. Dad said M r. Wheaton made his
wife smoke eight cigars in rapid succession as
a punishment for her vile act, after which he
forced her to wear out a chaw of Black Maria
plug so she'd get any thought of tobacco out
of her system. She repented of her sins pretty
quickly, began to exorcise herself vigorously
and was sent to bed without supper.
Billy was sent to boarding school to
"straighten him out" shortly after his father
caught him drunk for the first time. Billy told
my dad he drank himself silly while a
preppie, w hich is when he saw the light and
So now Billy is the preacher at the United
K ingdom Free Will Guiding Light Roll-'Em-Down-the-Aisle
Holy Mail Order Primitive
Church, for which the sanctuary was
donated by his father.
Billy Wheaton's son. Thurly, is my third
cousin, once removed. His daddy wanted to
send Thurly Wheaton off for a serious
college education. He knew Chapel Hill is
full of drug-crazed atheistic lunatic liberals
and he wanted Thurly to go to a more
respected institution of higher learning so
he sent Thurly to East Carolina.
Thurly came home two weekends ago and
caused quite a stir in the household with his
Looking almost as if he was conducting a
serious revival, the Rev. Wheaton was in a
throbbing-templed, red-jowled lather when
he finally got his telephone call completed
that Saturday morning. After tying Thurly
in a chair and assembling his wife, his six-year-old
daughter and their black maid,
Gracie, in the living room where he could
keep an eye on them, he phoned the doctor in
"Hello, Cape Fear Valley Hospital? Let
me speak to Dr. Fritz O'Skinnerick in
psychopharmacology," he brayed into the
"Hello, Dr. O'Skinnerick, this is the Rev..
Billy Wheatoni Black Ankle." He nervously
fingered a pencil and began to doodle
flowers on a notepad.
"Doctor, I'm worried about the
household. You see, my son, Thurly, came
home from college this weekend and secretly
baked some marijuana into the pancakes this
morning. I didn't eat as much as the rest of
the family but thev're acting right strange
like." "I he first symptom, Doc, was when 1
began to feel this strange tenderness for my
wife, Annie-Mae the kind of tenderness I
haven't felt for years. She seemed all soft and
"Then I noticed that the colors in the living
room were so rich and beautiful, 1 didn't
even feel like watching the NFL Game of the
Week on our color TV. 1 felt this strange
coziness, this odd contentment."
The Rev. Billy Wheaton took off his
glasses, wiped nis blow and then tossed the
glasses haphazardly on the table.
"Altogehter, Doc, it was one of the most
frightening experiences of my life."
Jim Pate, a junior, is a journalism major
from Fairmont, N.C.