Newspapers / Daily Tar Heel (Chapel … / Feb. 14, 1979, edition 1 / Page 5
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Wednesday, February 14. 1979 The Daily Tar Heel 5 j) ywm timk 0 um mr(p mm yaw a 77 . o 11 dl, I d9 many TUNC students say-in-co By ETTA LEE Staff Writer Carol and Tim Brown were married after their freshman year at Florida State University. Carol quit school to work. That was 14 years ago. Tim is back in school, working toward his doctorate in history at UNC. He has several part time jobs and his wife is a church secretary. Tim is among the more than 3,000 married students at UNC who must balance classes and study time as well as family and finances. During the fall semester there were 3,106 married students at UNC 1,643 males and 1,463 females. Of these; 221 men and 446 women were undergraduates and 1,033 men and 892 women were graduate students. Professional students account for another 514 married students. A successful student marriage, like any Other marriage, requires patience and willingness to sacrifice, Carol says. "Being able to work together is the crux. When Tim and I were married 14 years ago, you worked together and there wasn't so much emphasis on doing your own thing." About being married to a student Carol says, "The hardest part is that he doesn't have any leisure time. He has part-time jobs and he has to study in the evenings. Our daughter has had to make sacrifices, too. We have to be quiet in the evenings because Daddy has to study." Jerry and Dwellen Joy Clarke, married for five years, have the opposite situatioiwshe is in school and he works. "He helps with the housekeeping and the cooking. He's very understanding," Dwellen Joy says about her husband. "1 love my husband, but it's hard being married and being a student too," she adds. "Sometimes I have to study when we could be having fun." JOHN REINHOLD, a clinical social worker at the student mental health service, says he sees five types of student couples seeking help for their problems. "First is the couple who is not married, but is becoming very involved," he says. "This is the couple who is living together and feels ambivalent about making a greater commitment." A second type is the couple who has been married or living together for several years. "There may be conflicts about individual needs which are no longer fitting well in the marriage. There is a crisis period in a marriage after five to seven years. When a couple is first married, there is a strong romantic attachment which may begin to level off and decline after several years," Reinhold says. Graduate students often fall into this second category, he adds. "It may be that one student is very intensively involved in studies, so that when a so-called 'normal' crisis arises, it will be exaggerated. Graduate students may have young children too, who also have needs." A third category is made up of undergraduates who feel their youth is stifled by marriage. "They may be realizing they need to be free, that they need to experiment," Reinhold says. "Jhey may feel the need to do the thing their unmarried undergraduate friends are doing." Reinhold says the fourth type of student couple who comes to him for consultation has more serious problems. "They would have problems no matter who they were married to, and one or both may be taking only their own needs into account." The last type is the older married student who returns to college after several years of employment. "Often these students have adolescent children themselves. They may be in their first or second marriage, and there may be dissatisfaction in the marriage. It may be that the wife has kept house and the husband resents her return to school," Reinhold says. PAM AND JOHN Ferrari have been married less than a year. They live in Joyner Dorm, where Pam is assistant residence director. Because they live in a dorm, the Ferraris' expenses are cut substantially, they say. "If a couple lives in an apartment and both are in school, 1 don't know how they're making it," Pam says. "Prices keep going up." Money isn't as much a problem for the Ferraris as finding time to be together. Pam is working on a master's degree in statistics and her husband works at Durham County General Hospital. "Time conflicts account for a lot of problems among married students," John says. "They have to learn how to budget their time." Problems also arise when the student is ready to graduate, Pam says. It may be that the husband and wife cannot find jobs in similar areas and they have to choose which career is more important, she adds. SCflCIC&j ALTHOUGH some say money problems are the basis of many student marriage break-ups, Milton Carothers. a counselor in the campus ministry of University Presbyterian Church, disagrees. "Money is not what they come to me about," he says. "The underlying problem is different styles of dealing with conflict. Now, it may be that money is the precipitating conflict." Carothers adds, "It is important that couples learn that conflict is inevitable and to learn to fight fair and constructively rather than destructively. In counseling, 1 try to find out what precipitated the crisis and then I try to find out what conflicts they can't deal with." He sees most couples for one to eight sessions. If longer treatment is needed, he refers them to the student mental health service or local psychiatrists or psychologists, depending on the problem. Sometimes the conflicts arise when one or both . spouses are unable to talk about their anger, he says. He sometimes uses role-playing in counseling as a way to allow these feelings to be expressed. "It can be a safe place for couples 'to vent their anger and yet not let them burn each other up." Carothers recognizes the problems students face when they marry while in school, but he refuses to condemn student marriages. "Student situations can cause problems for married couples, but 1 can't make a blanket statement against student marriages." He also recognizes the problems students may face if they plan to marry as soon as they graduate. But he admits. "I don't have a crystal ball. 1 can't iOve noteo lead 4- cd jTviomaiice ROMANCE, Ark. (AP) Once again, postmaster Glen Belew is playing cupid. He says about 30 Valentine cards have been routed through Romance so far this year, in order to get a "romantic" postmark. The figure isx about what he expects each year. campaign marriage predict if a marriage will work out or not. What I'm interested in are the conflicts they have at that moment." SUE CUNNINGHAM and Jerry Castelloe plan to be married this summer. Sue will graduate this spring with a degree in accounting and Jerry graduated with a business degree in 1977. "Since Jerry graduated, he has been working and saving, so it's not like we have zero in savings," Sue says. "But I do know that finances cause a lot of problems for married people who have just graduated. You can love somebody as much as you want to until you don't have anything to eat. And then it gets hard." Susan Jewell and Donnie Luper plan to be married this summer also, and both will continue to be in school next year. "We've talked a lot about our plans," Susan says. Her fiancee will enter UNCs dental school in the fall. "1 know that the amount of study time required for dental school is going to be unbelievable. But I know the studying has to be done." Money will be a problem too, she says. "We were talking about the honeymoon all this weekend," she says. "We know that we can't blow all the money on the honeymoon. We're also working on furnishing the apartment now. "The main-thing is that we can't neglect each other," Susan says. "It's a sacrifice now, but it will be worth it later. We're determined to make it work. Neither one of us is the type to give up on anything." . From page 1 r- Foir tfh2' irecoircf In a column appearing on the editorial page Monday, the Daily Tar Heel incorrectly quoted DTH editor candidate Allen Jernigan as saying he is concerned with the proposal to change the University from a research facility to an educational facility. Jernigan actually ' said he is concerned with the proposal to change the status of the University from an educational to a research facility. 7 ' if ".M Head-ing somewhere? Excuse me, sir. Where were you heading? A passerby does a double take as rows upon rows -of-mannequin heads and their reflections eye him from a wig shop window. campaign in Stacy, Whitehead and Spencer. Reid Tuvim said he would concentrate in the Triad (Kenan, Alderman and Mclver) and Allen Jernigan planned to go door-to-door in Hinton James and Morrison. All three editorial candidates said they hope for high voter turnouts; they said they would have people out today reminding students to vote. "1 would guess somewhere around 4,000 to 4,500 students or 20 to 25 percent of the voters will turn out," Tuvim said. Jernigan would not comment on the possibility of a runoff election, but Stacks and Tuvim said they thought a runoff was likely. "I think all three of us are too strong for there not to be a runoff," Tuvim said. "Any two of us put together would get over 50 percent of the vote." The editorial candidates say they plan to take it easy today, with no major plans except to wait for election returns in Great Hall tonight. "I'm not really sure what I can do (Wednesday), personally, but I'll have people in dorms and frat houses," Stacks f ' JU -.4 v--" yxJL if1-J'p, May Judson TA T JL Skin is an important body tissue it holds moisture, fights infection and protects body organs. But for burn victims, that precious one-fifteenth thousandth of an inch of skin is almost impossible to grow back. To help burn patients, the first tissue bank in North Carolina for human skin has opened at North Carolina Memorial Hospital. The bank works in connection with the North Carolina Jaycee Burn Center there. "Growing skin is a long and painful process," says Liz Ruiz, administrative director of the skin bank. She says the skin bank can help make the patients more comfortable while under treatment. Skin removed from people who have died recently is used as a temporary dressing for the burn patient's wounds until they are ready for skin grafting. Wet skin is laid on the patient and peeled off every two or three days. f The dressing allows the patient's wounds to breath and, Ruiz suspects, heal more quickly. The alternative is to use pig-skin dressings. "With human skin, the patient is much more comfortable and is less subject to disease. We are doing more research to find out the specific differences in the two," Ruiz says. But the majority of burn patients are not able to take advantage of the skin bankl There is a great shortage of skin for the six-bed unit, and there will be a greater shortage when the 23-bed Burn Center opens next year. Ruiz says it is because the program, after four months of operation, is still new. "We have a lot of people responding, but theyare living people," Ruiz says. "We're gathering a good stockpile for the future. Unfortunately there is not a great deal of response from families whose members died recently." Ruiz says the North Carolina Association of Funeral Home Directors has been a great help. They and some doctors at NCM H have contacted families and procured skin donors. Unless a person has signed a donor card authorizing the use of his skin after death, permission must be obtained from his next of kin. To collect the skin, a nurse and doctor take standard operating equipment and an electric dermatone, or shaving knife, to the body. Under conditions similar to surgery, they shave the skin from the upper torso, arms and legs. The nurse and physician wrap the skin in gauze, place it in sterile plastic containers and store it on ice in a cooler. It is rushed to the hospital where the skin is processed and tested to make sure it is not diseased. The skin is. again cleaned and frozen in plastic bags which are placed in liquid nitrogen. The skin can be saved for up to six months. When ready for use, it is tested again and cleaned. , Ruiz says any skin is acceptable except the skin from persons with malignant diseases, those taking steroids, those who have had heptatis or persons with bacterial or viral disease, because they are transmitted through the skin. . Riuz says donor forms will be printed soon and more people can donate using them. The North Carolina Eye and Human Tissue Bank is handling donations. Interested persons may get information by writing the Eye and Human Tissue Bank, 3195 Maplewood Ave., Winston-Salem, N.C. 27103. said. "1 guess I'll just go to class." Polls will be open until 7 p.m. Vote tabulation will be in Great Hall, Carolina Union, and will be open to the public. The Monday night BSM forum was the last of a two-week round of forums sponsored by Greeks dorms and campus organizations, and most of the candidates made the best of their last public opportunity to air their views. Mackie reiterated his assertion that Student Government should make more; effort to deal with specific campus groups. "By dealing exclusively with campuswide issues, you miss a lot of what Student Government is about," Mackie said. "Student Government ought to be dealing with the specific groups and organizations that they fund in the budget process every year." Kelly said specific organizations are not excluded from Student Government "It's not necessary to cater to specific organizations because Student Government is working for the student body as a whole," he said. The three candidates for DTH editor said there is a need for more black input into the DTH. Jernigan said he would recruit more black staff members. Stacks said he would step up the investigation of Renwick's black admissions charges. Tuvim said he would improve coverage of the BSM. & KWS: Looking forward to the wildflowers in Duke Forest with you; how about the Ides of March plus four? Happy Valentine's. J.Capulet PS: I love you. Happy Valentine's Day Little Lady! I Love You and can't wait til Aug. 25. Love, Your Little Man, Patches, Kitty, MonkeyLOVELY MUNCHKIN, When your Irish eyes are smiling, our hearts are happy. Thanks for taking care of us! Love, friends of the little green man JO HAPPY 21st on VD! Scotty Loves Laura, but will Bobbie strike again to spoil their Valentine's? Really! Oops, I mean SLICK. Happy Birthday! M3S, You may think I'm crazy but I still love you. Here's proof. Ask me why later. Happy Valentine's Day. Love, GDS TO MUSIC 41:3: Chopin and George Sand had a fling, Tchaikovsky got married, poor thing. Tristan and Isolde, Ra dames and Aida, Hector and Harriet, All came to sad ends. But while we've only just met, I've a feeling IH like you yet. T-RHO. We waited till we were sure, now we've finally said it. The start of a super relationship. I love you, now everyone knows it. Happy Valentine's Day. SH TUESDAY NIGHT MEXICAN COFFEE DRINKER: after skating, dancing, and looking at grainy skies, my ankles are definitely stronger. Happy Valentine's Day! the paella and zucchini cook JR. DOCTOR Happy Valentine's Day! It's great to have you back. Let's make the most of these next months. Love and Kisses Hot Shot TO THE NERD who tried to kiss me on the Bacchae steps: Who would've thought "Summer Nights" would lead to "Hansel & Gretel?!" Happy Lover's Day, RWG! Hopelessly devoted. Chanel 5 Happy 'Love' Day, DOUBLE NUM! I'm so lucky you picked me to be your eternal Valentine. Love, your Num Nums! I love you! Boo Daniel TO MY BROTHER KENNY, Thanks for being such a super special brother. We've shared some fun times (H20). Have a very Happy Valentine's Day and remember I love you! Sis Rita, HAPPY VALENTINE'S! Thanks for making my semester a whole lot brighter. Remember, I owe you one big surprise. Love, Steve R.A.S. This is probably inappropriate, but I love you and your "tricks." Oh well, another card played. Let's keep singing in the rain. Happy Valentine's Day from your favorite trickster! HI HI my dear Sweetie Pie! Will you be my Valentine? Your loving honey, Dr. Bunch Mr. BumbleBEE: This Dumbean-o wants to know if you still be her Balentine? What you say? ILY XOXOXO Bunches!! And I need 'em! Mustard I cvjo unii HFRR nOKTDRl 9o unn in IS Hans All mu lnuo Rpth Tch! Tch! HAPPY Anniversary hLab. Will you be my hcute hcredible hcrazy tagor this Valentine? Have a good day today dear, I love you. David YOU IDIOT, this is also a lovers' holiday. Happy St. V's' day. Hope this thing goes on for another week, Glue Happy Valentine's Day to our sisters at Sigma Sigma Sigma. We love you all and are glad to be a part of you. With love, your pledges DEAR BOBBIE, Almost three, six days to be: Your three S's will come true. I tend to think of toes in warm places and your love kindled as the fire. HAPPY VALENTINE'S. Love, Bub-dear HAPPY VALENTINE to the girl who tells jokes about bed rest and HOT LIPS who comes in every Monday morning with chapped lips. Ange TO THE GANG on 4th West: We know you're not proven! Whoa rejection! Happy VD! Love LNM and her roommate LOVE ON VALENTINE'S to our handsome hunks residing on second floor Everette Let's have another all-nighter to celebrate! Les Rusees, D & D & B DEAR OLE 105 Love you both; including Pooh, Lambswool and Bruce! Thanks for making it so special this year!! (Cokes, spilled bourbon, H20!) Love, Ad-Lib! 1 1.189207115, Happy Valentine's Day to the girl with the sparkling blue Eyes. Whatever you're doing to me, DONT STOP! You're driving me BONKERS! LOVE, NURKEY , Mr. Mac, Thanks for asking me to be your Valentine, I'd love to. Thank Dear Abbey, remember we (Pooh) love you! L.G.T.T. Happy Valentine's Day! "E" R.EM. Happy Valentine's Day Beautiful. Keep your eye on the beach. WE'VE GOT A LOT MORE BEFORE THAT THOUGH. Love you! DLB VP THEODORE BEAR I love you dearly F.S. even if you are MTM Sorry I haven't been as understanding recently but will you still be my Valentine? Love Forever, Butt-Butt TO MY MEN'S JV BASKETBALL TEAM, Thanks for being such sweethearts. Even if the record doesn't show it, I know y'all are the best and y'all will always be very special in my heart. Happy Valentine's Day! Miss Manager LANETTA, Even though you did mess up my date, you're still the BEST sister and roommate anyone ever had. HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY! Love, Melanie A.J. Happy Valentine's We are going to have a great time tonight at the VDT. Love Ya always Happy Valentine's Day Susan Barrett! Tara loves with "all her heart" and so do I. You ain't seen the last of Ray Gardner, Hey Hey DEAREST K.H. and K.V. Thanks for reassuring me that Lumberjacks . are not extinct, but genuine Lumberjacks don't read classifieds. Happy V.D. The Sophomore Coed! DEAR LUMBERJACKS, Hope all you gentlemen find the Hot Coed of your dreams. This one has other plans! Happy V.D.... Love, the Hot Soph. Coed YOGI and BOOBOO Have you seen our pots, pig, polish remover, sugar, shoes, tweezers, tea, ice...? Happy Day and WE LOVE YOU! Ranger and Assistant HEY CUTE STUFF, Wanna be my Valentine? I'm just a monkey who likes Snowflakes. Don't ever melt away! Good luck in Athens. Love always, J.T.J. D. Q.T. This is the second Valentine's Day we've been together. Thanks for making them the best. Til later. Love, Scout KAT Don't forget we have a'date in Europe. My country or yours? (Remember your heritage.) Happy Valentine's. CAROL: What could be better than to go through life with sore collarbones! .How 'bout it? Happy Valentine's Day! Love, Buzz Ouw dawling Wicked, A sin and lustful Valentine's! ,May pleyalng squiwwels dance in youw coconut -filled heawt fowevew. Much love. Us again. (How gwoss!) LB, Happy BirthdayValentine's Day to my curly, cupid how appropriate that you were born on love day. I'm sure glad your arrow found my heart. PJ SPUNKY SHARON The thing of it is, you and your touchy-feely encounter sessions really sensitize this guy. Happy Valentine's Day! Drag Ass HAPPY VALENTINE'S to "Nickeln-Thanks for being the best "Little Sister" anyone could hope for! Love, Mark , To the four FRAS: Baba, Gail, Shirley, & Jennie: HVD to TGFITW! I love y'all even if you are SBWs! FRAS to the end. The 5th. . . ... ; TO JANET and KAREN: Happy Valentine's Day to our next Senior Class Sweethearts. Lovef HEY BROWN EYES, You don't know how happy you make me. Looking forward to many more great times! Happy Valentine's Day. Love 8 TO CHRIS M.: Wishing you a "suite" Valentine's Day. Love, S.L., T.C., J.C., D.F.. B.R., CM., B.R., R.C., S B., T.R. Robbie, Sasquatch, Rob, G. Dull, Dick, Frank, and Young Gregg: Prepare for Nucleophilic Attack! You're our favorite Valentines. Love, Miss Kira and Babe Happy Valentine's Day to the most intelligent and beautiful women at Carolina, the women of 1st Floor Joyner. RWH PUDDIN' FACE, You're always on my mind. I hope I'm doing the right thing. I love you. the infamous Pout Face CHIP and LUKE: Come Here! Put on some clean p.v.d.'s and well make like "Polar Bear" Valentines. Hope you'll be mine! No Signature Necessary TO MY FAVORITE MAJORETTE, Thanks for the great times we have shared together. You have made them all so much fun. Love, Your Valentine John LAURA and LAURA, Many thanks for the hearts, cones, M.A.'s, E.F.'s E's, M's, glazeds, sugar coateds and plains. Delicious! Happy V.D.. Love M and E To my Big, Sexy, Yankee SAILOR Valentine's Day was meant for SEDUCING and no one does it better than Southern Belles. Come, and I'll lead you Astray! "Luff," your Secret Southern Admirer C .M.C., You're the best! You've got a place reserved in my heart forever! Love S.B.R. LIZ, Time is a treasure and all I've time to do is treasure the time I spend with you. Be my Valentine. Love, BiLL TO Melanie my loving Wife and Christie my loving Daughter God Bless you for making my Life Complete also to all People Who love Jesus Christ who First loves US United Christian Fellowship Praise The Lord MY DEAREST BLUE DEVIL Please be my Valentine Frog. My lily pad and I request the honor of your presence. Love, G-man WHISKERS: The roses won't always be red and violets don't always grow blue. But one thing I know, 111 always love you. Sexy Shadee TO LESTER, sweetheart of the first year class: Roses are Red, Cadavers are Blue, When we need embalming. We'll all come to you! Happy Valentine's Day MS1 DEAR JIMMY, You are my Valentine every day of the year! You are always in my thoughts and in my heart. Happy Valentine's Day. Love, Yvonne LAURA B., I really like being with you and am looking forward to our next outing. Happy Valentine's Day. Love, Billy Joel CARLA Sfeen any Indians? Boy. I feel like a hot dog! Thanks for liking me just as I am. You're a good friend. Happy Valentine's Day! 117 ?Lewis? To my Honey-Honey, Baby-Baby, Lovey Dovey, Happy Valentine's Day! Yes I do, yes I am, and more than ever! Love, your M.S.B. ROGER. Thank you for being you. A girl couldn't ask for anyone more understanding. Remember flowers don't mean everything. I Love You, Cindy Happy Valentine's Day to the Birthday Girl and her Alpha Chi roomie. Well miss you. From the boys on the bottom SANDMAN: In you, I have found qualities I thought only existed in my dreams. If the next eighteen are like the last two, 1 won't mind waiting. As always, IW3IB. With love, your Angel Happy Valentine's Day to a beautiful aspiring gymnast with auburn hair and ice-blue eyes: My heart's with you cause you've warmed it with your smile! D.D. and 1 love you. Lisa, Darrell DIRT You know how I hate deadlines so of course I missed the VD one. Would you settle for 22 hugs? C Hey Beast! Be my Valentine! -all my love, Wench CXl.: If February 20th had come six days earlier, this would be our fourth Valentine's Day together! Happy 3rd, with much MAH and MROW from your sweet babboo! JULIE, HAPPY VALENTINE'S! Come on down and well have dinner again. I'm still crazy about you. Your BEAUTIFUL. Will you be my Valentine? Love, David - B.D. and G.L., HAPPY VALENTINES to the' girls who have stolen my heart. You have made this the greatest year of my life and I love you forever. Love, David Happy Valentine's Day Love! Hope this is the best ever... Yours truly (Snuggles, Baby, Chevy, etc.) P.S. I must tell you that this is the best V.D. I've ever had!! CHN: You can never really tell when somebody wants something you want too. Alone on Valentine's Eve or any other? Call me so I know you're alove. I miss your smile. Fan Club Member 9,291 ,Uo TO LITTLE WOODIE, my Valentine: Sweat heart roses unavailable. Let's ride our magic carpet of love and affection out of the Piedmont. MARK-MARK, My love to you, now and probably forever. Thanks for the happiest and most beautiful three months a girl could ask for. Take care. Toga soon? Love, Joy B.B., Since no one would read the book you wrote me a short message on Kenan snow. Afterdate dates and study breaks are my specialty. Thanks for all the peeled oranges. I'm looking forward to a trailways week. Will you be my Valentine? Happy Valentine's Day to the girls with the skin so soft. Well miss you. From the two studs and the taken man Question: Are we not men? HELL NO!! WE ARE DESPERADOS!! LeEat by Chic. Ja, aber nicht Skip! Lust me, you dykes! ARJE, alias Hop-a-long! Hobble back soon. And stay away from rollar skates. HA! HA! HA! Happy Valentine's! DTHers Jordwanz, Henderwom, Cleee, Woodworm, Foxy, Huge-ones 1 don't mind you wasting all my time. Let's keep the good times rolling. Happy V.D. Tex VOLUPTUOUS LU-FACE, Happy Valentine's! Lately, little squirrels have fiery sensitive eyes. Coincidence? Rosie doesn't have a chance as long as you have large plies. HEY JEEP-RIDIN COWBOY hope you made it through your tequila sunrise, there's still a "Cheeseburger in Paradise"! Well have to do it again. Understand? I guess you had to be there. A Cowgirl V
Daily Tar Heel (Chapel Hill, N.C.)
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Feb. 14, 1979, edition 1
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