8The Daily Tar Heel Thursday, November 12, 1987
By FRANCINE ALLEN
You call your friend, urgently
needing to talk to him or her, but
at the end of the receiver, this is
what you get: "I'm unable to get
to the phone at the moment.
Please leave your name and
number at the sound of the tone,
and I will get back with you
Angrily, you hang up the phone
and say to yourself. "If I had
wanted to talk to a
machine. I would have asked for
Don't lose hope.
Those people who own answer
ing machines are beginning to
understand the frustrations of
Unfortunately, they haven't de
stroyed their answering machines.
They'vejust become more creative
in the messages they put on them.
Some answering machine
owners have resorted to pre
recorded messages that are
impressions of famous personali
ties like these:
Alfred Hitchock "Good even
ing. I do hope that this doesn't
give you a fright, but it seems that
I'm all tied up."
Richard Nixon "I'm here
today recording these phone calls
purely in the interest of national
security. I swear this tape will be
erased. Trust me."
James Cagney "You. you
dirty rat. you. You must be the
dirty rat who called last time and
didn't leave a message. Shame on
Bill Cosby "The people aren't
home, and if you hate answering
machines as much as I hate
pudding, you're gonna hate me
because you and I, we're on an
answering machine. So. when you
hear the beep, say jello and leave
your name and message too."
Henry Kissinger "Our inter
preters are tied up now. I will
negotiate a call back."
Wolfman Jack "Hey baby,
what's happening? Got my mojo
working. I'm ready for some back
seat boogeying 'cause the folks are
Miss Piggy "Thank you for
choosing moi to answer your call.
Oh, what an honor. I never
dreamed I would reach such lofty
heights. Me? Why me? Leave your
name and number at the sound
of the beep. Au revoir, mon
Louis Armstrong (singing)
"Oh well, hello. Dolly. Well, hello.
Dolly. It's so nice to hearyour voice
right through the phone. There's
no one here. Dolly, but don't fear.
Dolly. We'll record your name and
number at the tone. Oh yeahl"
Jackie Gleason "Norton! Is
that you, Norton? Look, pal, I
know this is a necessity, but I told
you not to call me from the sewer.
I don't like dirty phone calls. So
leave a message at the tone."
Barbara Walters "Your
name? What do you nave to say
for yourself? Don't you think it
would be in the best interest of
the folks if you left that informa
tion at the sound of the beep?
Well, are you going to do it or not?
Next time you call a friend and
get an answering machine instead,
maybe you'll get lucky. Instead of
just talking to a machine, you
could end up talking to a celebrity.
Then you can hang up.
from page 6
There's also no need to worry
about titanium jewelry changing
shape. According to Johnson, "tita
nium is one of the few metals that
can be exposed to 2.000 degrees on
one end and sub-zero temperatures
on the other, and it still won't warp."
Along with Creative Metalsmiths
and Light Years. The Beach Connec
tion joins the space-age list, show
casing a few pairs of niobium earrings
made by the Holly Yashi Guarantee,
located in Areata. Calif. During the
six years the company has been using
niobium, demand for the metal has
increased so much that by last year
it was creating over 100.000 pairs
of hand-crafted, bright earrings.
General manager Catherine
Andrews attributes niobium's popu
larity to its ability to be colored
brightly. "One of the wonderful
qualities about niobium is its ability
to bring out the brilliance in what
you're wearing." she says.
The company has few accounts in
the South. It has picked up the
accounts it holds by accident. But the
Guarantee is planning some Atlanta
shows, according to Andrews. Both
Johnson and Maultsby agree that
niobium and titanium's two biggest
havens are New York and California,
because they are usually the most
progressive and open markets.
But Johnson says that both of the
space-age metals have landed, and
that they have saturated the markets
Not to mention the Defense
Stereo Sound kicks off the holiday season with a
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Sale 99 pair
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Sale M49 pair
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210 W.Franklin St.
(Across from Hardee's)
2705 High Point Rd.
(Next to McDonald's)
Layaway Now for Christmas
7105 Glenwood Ave.
(Next to Circuit City)
1608 Stratford Rd.
Taking Carolina By Sight And Sound on front of Circuit city)
Rflrtttly, errors in prices and specifications do occur in printing. Wa reserve the right to correct such errors. Some items similar to illustrations. Some quantities limited. Ow'vJ I Ow