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The Bombs and the
Well, folks, it's that time
again. Every time you watch
television, you are assaulted
by PREMIERE WEEK PREVIEWS.
With all of the new shows, new epi
sodes of old shows and schedule
changes, it can get just a little con
fusing. To help, here's a guide of the
shows to be sure to miss.
SUNDAYS:
Booker or Wiseguy, you be the judge.
Fox Network, which scored an un
expected hit with 2 I Jump Street, tries
to carry it one step further. Richard
Grieco does his Ken Wahl imitation
while working as an investigator for
a Japanese-owned business irrthe U.S.
At least Vinnie goes American!
Stephen J. Cannell, the creator, isn't
known for bombing-out, but this one
just isn't too promising.
Free Spirit(ABC) is another clone,
this time of Bewitched. Now, I'd be
the last one to gripe about witchcraft
on television, but all the good gags
were used last time. The only magic
that might save this one is the time
slot; Murder, She Wrote will hardly
appeal to the same audience and Sis
ter Kate has an equally unspectacular
plot.
Sister Kate, NBC's Sunday-night
offering, stars Stephanie Beacham of
Dynasty as, yes, a nun. She's in charge
of seven orphans of various ages and
will have her work cut out for her.
The Pope may have to intervene to
save this one.
MONDAYS:
Someone at CBS thought sched
uling The People Next Door in the
same lineup as Murphy Brown and
Designing Women might add to the
network's high ratings on Monday
nights. I doubt it. Judging from the
previews, this show never should have
made it off the drawing board. The
program revolves around Walter
Kellogg (Jeffrey Jones), a cartoonist
who can make his imagination come
to life. Okay, so it's an original, but
what are they going to do when the
gag gets old?
Alien Nation (Fox), otherwise
Battle for the Ratings: The Network Premieres Square Off
Erik Lisa Laura Richard Kelly Dave
FItppo Reichle Ross Smith Thompson Glenn
Free Spirit (ABC) vs. Free Sister Sister Free Sister . Sister
Sister Kate (NBC) Spirit Kate Kate Spirit Kate Kate
Life Goes On (ABC) vs. Booker Life Booker Life Life Life
Booker (Fox) Goes On Goes On Goes On Goes On
Famous Teddy 2 (CBS) vs. Famous Famous Famous Alien ' Famous Famous
Alien Nation (Fox) Teddy Z Teddy Z Teddy Z Nation Teddy Z Teddy Z
Chicken Soup (ABC) vs. Wolf Chicken Chicken Chicken Wolf Chicken
Wolf (CBS) Soup Soup Soup Soup
Doogie Howser M.D, (ABC) vs. Nutt Doogie Nutt Nutt Doogie Doogie
Nutt House (NBC) House Howser House House Howser Howser
Young Riders (ABC) vs. Top of Young Top of Young Young Young
Top of the Hill (CBS) the Hill Riders the Hill Riders Riders Riders
Baywatch (NBC) vs. Snoops (CBS) Baywatch Baywatch Snoops Baywatch Baywatch Baywatch
vs. Family Matters (ABC)
Billy Stockard
r.
known as V Strikes Back is based on
the 1988 movie of the same name.
The movie featured aliens with
splotchy skinheads and bad inten
tions, and the series promises more
of the same. The aliens look like a
family of Gorbachevs.
TUESDAYS:
Remember when Jack Scalia fell
from J.R.'s apartment window on Dal
las two years ago? Maybe he should've
gone splat. In Wolf (CBS), he plays a
truly original character a framed
cop with a chip on his shoulder. Sure,
he's better looking than Roseanne
Barr, but can he steal her audience?
He probably would've found better
luck playing Sue Ellen's dead boy
friend. Of course, I have to mention an
other of CBS's new Tuesday offer
ings: Rescue 911, featuring William
Shatner. It'll take more than cardio
pulmonary resuscitation to revive this
baby. The show promises live foot
age of death-defying rescues and serves
up Captain Kirk without his Enter
prise. If it's a choice between Tony
Danza, Andy Griffith, and William
Shatner during this time slot, I think
I'll read my Western Civ.
WEDNESDAYS:
Not to completely rake CBS over
the coals, but I do have to mention
Peaceable Kingdom, featuring Lindsay
Wagner without her bionic parts, and
Tom Wopat (Luke Duke) without
Bo, Daisy and the General Lee. This
show has an original idea, which is
more than most shows can say. It's
about a zoo within the home. On
the positive side, good scripts might
save the day. But don't expect to
watch this one as you bake your
Thanksgiving turkey. Hey, maybe
Boss Hogg will make a guest appear
ance. To counter this winner, ABC of
Bummers:
fers Doogie Howser, M.D. He's a sec
ond year resident going through
puberty. Just what you look for in a
doctor, but can he reach the operat
ing table? Neil Patrick Harris held
his own with Whoopie Goldburg in
Clara's Heart, but it would take a
miracle to save this one.
THURSDAYS:
Now isn't this an original plot?
Right from the script of the movie
Young Guns comes the series The
Young Riders (ABC). With a cast
straight out of GQ, as opposed to the
Old West, it's just as well this show
is buried in the time slot opposite
Cheers. The best plot twist the writ
ers could create was a girl disguised
as a guy kicking some cowboy butt.
FRIDAYS:
On NBC this season, the Hardy
Boy meets the Hunk (without the
car) on a beach with lots of blondes.
Baywatch, starring Parker Stevenson
(at least he's better than Shaun Cas
sidy) and David Hasselhoff (Michael
Knight), details the trials and tribu
lations of two average California life
guards. It also features more bodies
than a Friday the 13th movie. Has
selhoff almost drowned during film
ing (Maybe he should have. Kitt
always had the best part on Knight
Rider at least he had snappy dia
logue). This is definitely a show I
can live without.
Also on NBC this season, it's "the
old-fashion cop near retirement who
is teamed up with the rebel" theme
revisited in Hardball. Sound like a
recent movie sequel to you? John
Ashton (Dick Butkus look-alike) and
Richard Tyson (Lost Boys reject) star
in this thrilling drama.
SATURDAYS:
Living Dolls (ABC) stars Mother
Walton (Michael Learned) and four
favorite stereotypes the Brain, the
Spoiled Brat, the Airhead and the
Attitude Problem as owner and
employees of a model agency. As a
spinoff of Who's the Boss, it already
has one strike against it, and guest
Ones to miss
v x ... J1
Richard Tyson and John Ashton (I-
appearances by Alyssa Milano and
Tony Danza won't help a bit.
Is this comedy or glitz? With Sam
Micelli (Milano) always interview
ing the models for her school's news
paper, it will be hard to tell. This
story idea didn't succeed with Mor
gan Fairchild and Nicolette Sheri-
Omnibus Piclcs of the Season
Because we are such sports writer
wannabes, the Omnibus staff has
decided to add a special feature to
our TV preview issue, the Omnibus
Picks of the Season. With so many
mediocre premieres coming out this
fall, we decided to try our hands at
predicting the ratings winners.
Featured judges this week are: Erik
(I already have a middle name) Flippo,
Lisa (did anyone get a hardship park
ing permit on this campus?) Reichle,
Laura (I have no middle name) Ross,
Richard (I'm a movie guy. Why do I
have to judge TV?) Smith, Kelly (I
don't know why I moved here from
Oregon) Thompson and guest Dave
(summer Tar Heel god) Glenn.
Here's the plan: we figured out
DTH Omnibus Page 5
Thursday September 14, 1989
la
Pho courtesy WPTF-TV
r) are bad copgood cop In 'Hardball'
dan (Paige on Knots Landing) in the
flop Paper Dolls, so why revive it now?
This one's worth avoiding.
Believe it or not, there may actually
be a few new shows north twitching.
Stay tuned next week for the better half
of this season's TV premieres.
when the new premieres will be run
ning against each other and each
picked the one we think will get
higher ratings. We'll publish the re
sults soon, and give die winner the
You're ugly and you watch too much
TV award.
In the meantime we have devel
oped some sub-awards for the best
explanations we gave for our picks.
Sister Kate "I don't care. Murder,
She Wrote is going to kick some butt,"
Lisa Reichle. Alien Nation Til
pick a movie spinoff any day," Rich
ard Smith. Wolf "Those damn
Weight Watchers ads are getting on
my nerves," Kelly Thompson. Bay
watch "I know most of those girls,"
Dave Glenn.
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