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THE WILMINGTON DBPAT. M6f0 AX:maT20;a !
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Behind The ; Scenes In
The-" Nation' Capital
By THOMAS F. LOGAN. '
Washitgto "May: 2Q .-W4aMngbn
la ai fcitf; both wed: J this .week by a
clash of; -atmospheres,' "the ; pastoral
side ;i6te Is sounded soothingly, but
penetratijisly- In ' the' amiable activi
ties of .the kind-faced ; sheep that
graze upon the grass .In the vicinity
of the white house. A more- insistent
note of utilitarianism , is struck by
Postmaster General Burleson's aerial,
mail carriers that rise immediately:
behind - President Wilson's official
home and wing noisy flights "above
the executive mansion" to Philadel-:
phla and New Yotfc. Consequently,
the population of the nation's capital
finds itself kept continually on the
jump.
During the cool hours of the early
morning it is possible, while strolling
past the home of the president, to
gaze with tranquil approbation upon
a bucolic picture and recall pet lines
'from Grey's -Elegy or IngeloWs Lin
colnshire verses. If this philosophic
mood continues until 11:30, however,
the spirit of the strollers' dreams is
rudely changed by the roar of pow
erful machinery overhead. And, of
' course,, this new clamor in the skies
is exceedingly bewildering to the
gentle wool-producers that came to
the seat of government with the defl
ate understanding that life on the
edge Of the Mason and Jixon line
was a dreamy clover-scented exist
ence. The confusion would not be quite
so, bad if the United States mail air
planes turned, south with their loads
of 24-cent stamps and drifted across
the Potomac river to Richmond- Vir
ginia, or Wilmington, North Caro
lina, or ) Tampa, Florida. The whir
of the aerial , motors would reach the
president's sheep, of course, but
might easily be accepted by them
as some new-fangled device invened
by Secretary Tumulty to grind corn
for their evening meal. It is an en
tirely different matter, however,
when these new-style letter carriers
bop up into the air and sail over the
white house, bound for northern
ports. The head of the white house
sheep family has satisfied himself in
the last four days that the overhead
pests are not sheep hawks, but the
exact nature of the nuisance is sill
quite vague to him.
Mr. Burleson's new speed marvels
are not more bewildering to the
white house sheep, however, than
those aristocratic quadrupeds are to
members of the house and senate.
The legislative branch of the service
has gone oyer with microscope all
newspaper ; reports on the reasons
that led to the installation; of sheep
on the lawns that flank the white
house portals. (Congress is frightful
ly nervous ajtd jumpy these days,
anyhow. George Creel keps right on
annoying the law-makers, no matter
how often they speak sharply to him
about his methods or how many
times they strike his references to
legislators from The Congressional
Record. ' What the senators and rep
resentatives would like to know, and
they are -prepared to pay real money
for the information, is whether or
not President Wilson meant anything
particularly significant when he ap
proved Rear Admiral Grayson's idea
of pastoralizing the territory bound
ed on the east by the treasury depart
ment and on the west by the war,
navy and state departments.
Here Is the situation in a nutshell.
Mr. Wilson may have accepted Doc.
Grayson's sheep idea without giving
it a third, or even asecond, thought.
It may be that old Sea-Dog Cary G.
mentioned the thing casually and
that the president "okehed" it absent-mindedly,
or with the crafty
thought that if he said, "O, very well,"
or something like that, that the presi
dential physician would go thead and
wish the sheep on the white house
without arguing any more about
them. If that is really what hap
pened, congress is content. The law
makers don't mind sheep, just so the
ram director general doesn't butt in
when they-slip through the gates to
ask the president which bill he'd like
tahave passed first. In fact, they
rather like sheep. The cunning lit
tle animals remind some of them of
home districts, and plain people, and
denorat;c simplicity, and all that
sort of thing. Besides, it might have
been goats,' or porcupines, or wild
cats, or almost any kind of animal
that couldn't be depended upon to
get chummy -;th visiting congress
men. Therefore the sheep thing
goes, so far as the legislative branch
of the government is concerned,, un
less-
Well, there you are. It's a painful
thing to say, but really, just between
ourselves, you know, there is a tiny
bit of chance that all is not well
with that Cary Grayson sheep idea.
Everybody knows the quality that is
associated with the very name of
sheep. Here's the big problem. Was
President . Wilson, by any remote
chance, thinking about congress
when he -.surrounded his Washington
home with .sheep? It's wrong to en
tertain unjust suspicions, of course,
but, honestly now, doesn't it seem
possible that he might want to study
the habits Of his tame and woolly pro
teges as a- preparation for future
dealings with sojourners in that big,
white, domed building at the other
end. of Pennsylvania avenue? You
see, if the., head of the nation even
for a' moment, had thoughts of con
gress In mind" when he told Joe Tu
multy he could; sign a receipt foz
Carl Grayson's ' sheep, the- situation
would be frightful. , Congress wants
to know the ; exqt truth. t Gharlec
Rann Kennedyor any other expert
on symbolism, can have the keys of
the capitol or a jimmy for the win
dows of "the house and senate office
buildings,' if he, or they, will drop in
to Washington very quietly and tajk
things overT'man to man, with per
turbed senators v and representatives.
As a matter of fact, there is nO
real evidence to prove that George
Creel isn't back-, of the whole sheep
thing. Doc Grayson may , be just
a blind. George . is always .thinking
up some "scheme 'to annoy -the legisla
tors. Only a few weeks ago it be
came necessary to appoint a special
committee ot the house to establish
whether or not he had insulted th
southern end of the capitol building.
And the investigation of the commit
tee proved conclusively that he had.
He was verbally castigated for his
congressional comments and told to
lay-off the law-makers in the future.
The hard work of the committee was
thrown away, however. Here he is,
back again, with a brand new insult
He told somebody that the reason
he wouldn't explore the heart of con
gress was because he didn't like
slumming. Do you get that? And
from a government official who was
the chief of police in Denver befor
the town went dry. If George Creel
thought up the white house scheme,
it looks pretty bad.
There is a small element in con
gress that has its doubts about the
white house sheep, and would stick to
them against any assurances, even
from Uncle Joe Cannon or Senator
J. Ham Lewis. They don't wish Joe
THmiiitv's nets any hard luck, but
hope they will develop the pip. These
Bolshevik! hung around the outside
of the white house fence last Wed
nesday and narrowly observed the
conduct of the sheep while the first
aerial mail cariers out of Washington
sailed above the peaceful herd. The
net results were extremely disap
pointing. It is apparent the sheep
have seen so many new and curious
sights in the national capital that a
little thing like a flying machine
lacks power to stampede them. When
this fond hope was blasted there were
melancholy head-shaking and deep
sighs of regret.
As a consequence of this disap
pointment there is now talk of secret
plottings. One vindictive enthusiast
has hinted at plans to corrupt the
drivers of Mr. Burleson's high-powered,
cloud-splitting aerial mail wag
ons. It is obvious that any attempt
to bomb the flock with brick-bats as
the noon flyers wing rapidly over the
white house grounds would be
promptly stopped by secret service
air scouts. It would be possible
however, to make the vicinity of the
executive mansion a very unpopular
grazing district if any of Mr. Burle
son's pilots' -'could be persuaded to slip
overboard, at exactly 11:3a 1-2 some
morning, a mechanical wolf or a
self-winding imitatiorf coyote. The
white house sheep have shown equal
indifference to squirrels from the
neighboring parks and spads from
neighboring, hangars. A lively coun
terfeit of a certain member of the
dog family, eased over the tail-boan
of an altitudinous mail-pouch hustler,
would, it is thought, curtail the
visit of the selectives under the Cary
Grayson act.
In the meantime, however, the
sheep and the airships continue to lie
down at night almost side by side.
Only a fence and a few sentries keep
them from closer association. The
simple life persists in at least one
spot in Washington, in spite of the
whirring machinery of war.
HUNS' THIRD ATTEMPT, r
, HAS PROVEN KAILiURE.
AtWarWnhYourseifl
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