Friday, October 23, 1936.
THE PILOT, Southern Pines and Aberdeen, Nbrth Carolina
Page Thrw
“Our Daily Bread”
A Playlet Written By The Editor Of The Pilot For Use In The
Republican National Campaign and Published
Here by Request
Editor, The Pilot:
I have read with a great deal of interest the sketch which the Editor
of The Pilot wrote this summer and which was approved by the Repub_
lican National Committee and has been used by National publications
in different parts of the United Slates and enacted in amateur theat
ricals. I think you owe it to the people who read The Pilot to publish
this regardless of any feelings that the editor may have in regard to
printing in his own publication.
To hold back, for personal reasons, would not be treating the sub
scribers to The Pilot exactly right, and hundreds of others who enjoy
reading your publication.
At my special Instance and request I ask you to publish Mr. Hyde’s
“play” irrespective of any personal feelings which he may have in the
matter.
—H. F, SEAWELL. JR.
‘OUR DAILY BRE.\D"
By Nelson C. Hyde
CHARACTERS;
Joseph, in coat of many colors.
Reuben, Joseph’s brother.
Mr. Brain Truster.
Farmer-
Housewife.
Storekeeper.
Three Pigs.
Elephant.
PROLOGUE
Joseph, in his many colors,
Once interpreted a dream . . .
But w'e’ll let the story tell you
What a very clever scheme.
Curtain rises on Joseph in midst of
his plentiful possessions in a barn. He
is looking them over, rubbing his
hands.
Enter Reuben bowing before Jos
eph.
JOSEPH—Whence come ye to Egypt,
Brother?
REUBEN—From the land of Canaan
to buy food, for the famine is
great in Canaan, and my Father j
Jacob hath heard that you have
stored in years of plenty against
a drought-
JOSEPH—Verily, God hath been
good to me for He hath given
me wheat and He hath given me
sense. |
REUBEN—He gave unto us wheat
but if He gave us sense we have
failed to use it, for we thought'
not of drought and famine. j
JOSEPH— I but interpreted the
dream of Pharoah the King, of
the seven fat kine which did eat:
up the seven lean kine. I gather-1
ed unto myself the grain of,
Egypt during the seven years of
plenty, and now I have enough
for these lean years—and some 1
for thee, too, Reuben. j
REUBEN—Jehovah be praised for j
the wisdom of Pharoah, and for;
thy kind heart. Oh Joseph.
SCENE I
In Summer when it’s nice and hot,
The squirrels gather nuts and hide
’em, I
Oh, would that others gave a thought-'
If Winter comes, what may betide [
’em.
Same setting. Curtain rises on
Brain Truster, a Farmer and Three
Pigs. j
BRAIN TRUSTER—You say yr>u ]
cannot sell your crops and live
stock without a loss. That is very
simple- You are raising too much
corn and wheat and tobacco and
things, too many cows and pigs.
When the supply is greater than
the demand, cut down the supply-
We learned that at college.
FARMER— But the crops are in the
fields and the pigs in the pens,
and there is no market- We owe
for seed and fertilizer, and our
taxes will soon be due.
BRAIN TRUSTER—It is just a mat
ter of common sense. If you have
planted too much for the demand,
put your mules to the plow and
turn under the excess. We’ll have
all the farmers do that and we’ll
get the crops down to where they
belong. Perfectly simple.
FARMER— And what about my
pigs?
'THREE LITTLE PIGS—Yes, what
about us?
BRAIN TRUSTER—Kill off every
third pig.
pay our crop loans.
BRAIN TRUSTER— Very simple.
We’ll have the government pay
you for what you do not raise.
This will tide you over.
FARMER—Where’s the money com
ing from to pay us?
BRAIN TRUSTER—We’ll borrow it
against future taxes.
FARMER—But we can’t pay our
taxes now. If you increase taxes
we won’t be any better off.
BRAIN TRUSTER—The rich man
will pay the taxes. The city fel
low.
FARMER—But it’s the city fellow
who buys what we raise. Cut him
down and you cut off our mar
ket.
BRAIN TRUSTER— He has to eat.
FARMER—Yes, but he doesn’t have
to eat as much. And if you cut
down consumption, we’ll have to
plow more acres under and kill
more pigs- You’ll have to pay us
again, and up will go taxes again,
and up will go prices, and so on.
Was that an agricultural college
you went to ?
BRAIN TRUSTER— No. Political
Economy. It raises men to run
governments.
FARMER—Does it plow any of them
under? (PAUSE) It will in Nov
ember- (EXIT)
FIRST PIG—Let’s go out and get it
over with.
SECOND PIG—Get what over with?
FIRST PIG—We’ve got to toss a
coin to see which one of us is go
ing to Heaven.
ALL THREE PIGS—Wee, wee, wee,
wee—
We’ve got to die for Fianklin D.
,. _ Curtain
»' •«. I
SCENE II.
Now times have changed; there is no
rain
To make things grow, and life is
harder.
If grist won’t come in for the mill—
Why, bread won’t come in for the
larder.
Curtain rises on grocery store in
country, with cracker barrel, etc. On
stage are Storekeeper in white apron,
and Housewife with basket.
HOUSEWIFE—Forty-three cents for
eggs I That’s terrible. How much
is bacon?
STOREKEEPER—Forty-five cents a
pound-
HOUSEWIFE— What makes it so
high ?
STOREKEEPER—Uncle Sam killed
off six find one-half million pigs
in 1933, and has beon paying
farmers not to raise pigs. Don’t
you know about the A. A. A. ?
HOUSEWIFE—I thought that was
declared unconstitutional. The
Supreme Court killed it.
STOREKEEPER—Yes, but too late.
It’s like the soldiers in the Great
War to End All Wars. They died
to save their country, but they
died in vain-
HOUSEWIFE—At these prices you
must be making a lot of money.
STOREKEEPER—Say, I have to pay
so much for the stuff I sell I can
hardly make a go of it. I can’t i
make a reasonable profit because j
the people can’t pay the prices. |
she was in she said she just
couldn’t pay such prices, but
darned if I know where she is
getting things any cheaper.
HOUSEWIFE— I wish I knew.
STOREKEEPER —Doubt if I’m go
ing to have enough left over at
the end of the year to meet my
taxes, the way they’re going up,
too.
HOU9EWIFE3—Do you mean to tell
me that in this great big country
of ours . we can’t raise enough
food for our people? I thought
we’d been shipping food to other
countries all these years because
we raised more than we could
eat.
STOREKEEPER — We were. But
haven’t you heard about some
thing called the New Deal?
HOUSEWIFE—I’ve been kind of con
fused about it. It’s so mixed up.
I hear people talking about the
New Deal all the time but my
husband calls it ‘the New Dole’.
I can’t figure out all these new
fangled things.
STOREKEEPER—Your husband has
it pretty well sized up. Say do
you know that in the first four
months this year two million dol
lars worth of pork products were
shipped into this country?
STOREKEEPER— Yes ma’am I That
noise you hear over in Pig Cem
etery is all the little American
porkers grunting in their graves
as they hear of ship after ship
coming in from foreign ports
with foreign pigs to take their
places-
HOUSEWIFE- I don’t blame them.
STOREKEEPER—And guess what I
Foreign farmers shipped us
twenty million dollars worth of
corn last year,—we, the biggest
corn producing country in the
world I
HOUSEWIFE—Why was that?
STOREKEEPER—Because we plow
ed under thousands of acres of
corn in 1933 when we had more
than we needed. Someone forgot
there was a future.
housewife:—My husband says our
children are going to know there
was a Future when it turns into
a Present. I mean, if we can feed
them long enough for them to
grow up-
STOREKEEPER—He’s right about
that.
HOUSEWIFE--I don’t know just
what he means, but he says the
kids have got to pay back all the
money the country is borrowing
to pay farmers for NOT raising
what they AREN’T getting to
eat because we can’t afford to
buy it. „ .
STOREKEEPER—You’ll know what
he means when the tax collector
comes around the next few years.
Have you ever borrowed from a
bank and tried to get out of pay
ing it back ?
HOUSEWIFE—I’ve always tried not
to borrow, but I guess I’m sort
of old fashioned. I remember
when a million dollars was sup
posed to be a lot of money. Now
all you hear is billions.
ENTER FARMER—
FARMER— Mornin’. How's business?
STOREKEEPER—It wouldn’t be bad
if you didn’t soak me so much
for everything. Why don’t you
raise enough vegetables and pigs
and stuff?
j FARMER—Say, brother, look at this.
Just got It at the postoffice.
Check for $280.00.
STOREKEEPER
for?
Whew 11 What
HOUSEWIFE—No I
STOREKEEPER— Yes ma’am. No
wonder we are all confused about
this New Deal if the Dealers
themselves are balled up that
bad.
HOUSEWIFE— “Give us this day
our daily bread!”
STOREKEEPER— They’ve plowed it
under.
Curtain
Pinehurst Boy Scouts
Hold Court of Honor
FARMER—Not planting them things
you want. Uncle Sam sent it.
HOUSEWIFE—Heavens alive!
STOREKEEPER—Now you see what
your husband means when he
talks about the children’s future.
What are you going to do with
the money, Jim?
FARMER —Looks to me like I'd bet
ter buy a new plow. It’s plowing
under that got me this check.
Pretty soft, eh ?
HOUSEWIFE—Pretty soft for you.
But I’ve got three children to
feed, and a husband, and he’s
working the skin off his hands
to earn enough to make that
check of yours good.
FARMER—What do you mean?
STOREKEEPER- She means that
she and her husband and children
and you and I are Uncle Sam.
That's our check you’ve got
there.
FARMER-Say, I never thought of
that.
STOREKEEPER—Neither have a lot
of other people. But it’s true- Do
you know what your family’s
share of the national debt of 34
billion dollars is? Well, it’s about
$1200. Every family in the United
States owes that much today.
FARMER—Whew I That makes my
$280 look kinda small- Guess I
should be glad I’m getting some
of those billions they’re giving
away.
HOUSEWIFE—Even if my children
don’t eat?
STOREKEEPER—Even if I can’t
make enough to pay my rent?
W'ho’s going to sell those things
they WILL let you raise if we
grocers go out of business? Then
how long will your $280 last’
FARMER—It don’t go so very far
now. Everything a farmer has
to buy is away up-
STOREKEEPER—I’ll bet you don’t
Know that the folks at Washing
ton paid out over a quarter of a
billion dollars to cut down the
wheat supply of the country a
couple of years ago, and now
they’ve got ten million more
acres in wheat than were plant*
ed then.
EPILOGUE
Country store scene. Three little
pigs, in mourning bands, on the stage.
j THREE LITTLE PIGS, singing:
' We’re three little pigs who have lost
our way.
Wee wee wee.
We’ve come to the end of our perfect
day.
Wee, wee, wee.
For we are sentenced to die to make
Democracy safe from a tummy ache
Ther’too many pigs for the country’s
sake—
Wee wee wee.
FIRST PIG—Ma hoped to raise her
children to be pork chops-
SECOND PIG—She wanted me to be
a luscious ham.
THIRD PIG —
I was really in the makin’
To become a Beechnut Bacon
And nestle close beside a candied
yam.
ALL- Wee, wee wee wee.
FIRST PIG—
Goodbye, Pen;
Farewell, Sty.
This little piggy’s
Got to die.
SECOND PIG—
This little porky’s on his way
To the Cem-e-tery of the A. A. A.
THIRD PIG—
And as for me, you see me now
A disillusioned future sow.
ril never mother little porkers
To feed 10 ravenous New Yorkers.
ALL (sadly) —
Wee wee wee wee.
We've got to die for Franklin D.
ENTER ELEPHANT
ELEPHANT—
Hold on here! Cheerio, my hearty.
Don’t you know there’s another
party ?
Wp stan^ {or Wf**-
Afitl d^wn w'th afficulturial ptrlfe.
PIGS, in chorus—
Well here’s a friendly little runt,
Let’s give three
elephant.
ELEPHANT—
Yes, make it four—
Wee wee wee
For you don’t have to die
For the G, O. P-
Curtain
cheers for the
Honors and Medals Awarded and
Scoutmaster Hardison
Given Third Degree
A Court of Honor for the boy
scouts of Pinehurst was held In the
Pinehurst Community Church on
Thursday night, October 15. The
Court was composed of the following
men; the Rev. A. J. McKelway, Dr.
Tom R. Cole, W. L- Cunningham, R.
E. Wicker, Lacy Adcox and W. P.
Morton.
Honors and medal were awarded as
follows; Tenderfoot badge to Harris
Fletcher of West End; First Class
Scout badges to Billy Viall and Jesa
Cole; First Aid to Animals, Public
Health and Swimming Merit badges
to Donald Currie, Jr.; Swimming,
Personal Health, Public Health, Path-
finding, and Art Merit badges to
James Wicker; Swimming and Public
Health Merit badges to John Taylor.
It was a very delightful occasion.
The scouts opened the exercises of
the evening with their regular assem
bly program. They then turned the
meeting over to the chairman of the
Court of Honor.
After making the awards Mr. Mc
Kelway stated that the Scouts wish
ed to hold their own court- James
Wicker took the chair, and the Scouts
took the seats vacated by the mem
bers of the court. At the request of
Chairman Wicker, Dr. Cole escorted
Scoutmaster W. E. Hardison before
the court. How the members of this
court did question their Scoutmaster.
At the close of this impromptu ex
amination, the Scouts voted that their
Scoutmaster had passed the examina
tion. In behalf of the Scouts and the
members of the Scout Council, James
presented Scoutmaster Hardison with
a handsome Gladstone bag as a tok
en of their appreciation for his faith
ful service.
The Pinehurst troop has made
marked progress during the past few
months. The boys are more interest
ed in scouting and they soon will be
asking for arother Court of Honor.
The Pinehurst Council is highly pleas
ed with the work of Scoutmaster
H^rtl;sun and the Scouts.
wee.
Tomorr:.w, Satjrctey, is th«> final
day for registration. If you are not
registered, you cannot vote on No-
/em'^er 3d. School districts and mu-
nloipal registrations do not count. Sfi?^
youi' r^fyifitrar if In doubt about your
eligibility to vote, - , ^
Remember Tuesdays and Saturdays
are Curb Market days in Southern
Pines-
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THREE LITTLE PIGS—Wee wee, I HOUSEWIFE—That’s me all right. |
! STOREKEEPER—One of my oldest!
FARMER—But all this isn’t going to I and best customers hasn’t been
get us any money right quick to |
near me for a week. Last time
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■ -x
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