Published by Roanoke Publishing Co.
VOL. IIL 7. "
k'f0 GOD, FOR COUNTRY ND FOR TRUTH."
W. FLETCHER AUSBON, EDITOR;
C. V. W. AUSBON, BUSINESS MANAGER
PL V MOUTH, N. C, FRIDAY, MAY (3, 1892.
JST0. 51.
BEV. DB. TALMAGB.
The Eminent Brooklyn Divine's Sua.
day Sermon.
Subject; The Three Tabernartt. Story
nf TriMls nnd Trlutnplis."
Text: "Lei make three tabernacles.1
Luke ix., 83,
Our Arab, ponies were almost dead with
fatigue, 1&3, in December, 1S89, we rode near
the tvt of Mount Hermon in the Holy
-LiitVJ, the mountain called by one "a
"w.uniam or ice," by another "a jrlitterin
.'-reastpiate or ice," by another "the Mont
Blanc of Palestine. Its top has an almost
unearthly brilliance. But what must it
iwvn open in ine time to which my text re.
rei &r iter anilJamnH nri Jnhn vom
that mountain top with Jesus when, sud-
-.j, wu. i. iiu.ti iw& u mg KIOW Ol IDo
5y sun. and Moses and Elijah, who
ad been dead for centuries, came out from
, the heavenly world and talked with our
baviour. What an overwhelming three
; Jttoses, repreaentinR the law; Elijah, repre
.. sentintr the nronhets. and Ohriafc"
inc all Worlds. , . , r
Impetuous Peter was so wrought upon by
iJireouud ui mis wonarous tnree, that,
s W'thout waiting for time to consider how
preposterous was the proposition, he cried
?ut,"Ij3t ws make tnree tabernacles one
Tnee "lie for Moses and one for Elijah."
wow'd they get the material for
rbmldins one taheraenle, much less material
enough to build two tabernacles, and still
wsp. how would they get the material for
. uilding three? Where would they get the
hammers Where the gold? Where the
silver? Where. the curtains? Where the
.costly adornments? Hermon is a barren
peak, and to build one tabernacle in such a
place would have been an undertaking be
yond human achievement, and ' Peter was
propounding the impossible when he cried'
cut in enthusiasm, "Let us build three taber
nacle " . ...
v And yet that is what this congregation
'BAR hfn pnllal trs rin onH h An I'l!.
; . Jfiret Brooklyn Tabernacle was dedicated in
,; and destroyed by fire In 1873. . The
., woond Brooklyn Tabernacle was dedicated
in 1S74, and destroyed by Are in 1889. The
third Brooklyn Tabernacle was dedicated in
April, 1891, and in that we are worshiping
to-day. ; What sounded absurd for Peter to
. propose, when he said on Mount Hermon, in
the words of my text, "Let U3 build three
tabernacles," we have not only done, but in
the mysterious province of God were com-
pelle i to do. -
1 announce to you this day that we are at
last, as a church, in smooth waters. . Ar-
kAn(mmanfa k.va luan m.Ja mu..u
financial difficulties are now fully and satis-
Aacvoruy aajusteo. uur income will exceed
. our outgo, and Brooklyn Tabernacle will be
yours and belong to you aud your children
after yon, and anything you see contrary to
fhii tnn mav nf nurn tk. -n1inaA
tmbit which some people have got of mis-
, eijf-esenwng iqis cnurcn, ana tney cannot
stop. When I came to Brooklyn I came to a
. email church and a big indebtedness. We
bave now this, the largest Protestant church
Jn America, and financially as a congrega
tion wo are worth, over and beyond all in
debtedness, considerably more than 1150,000.
I have preached here twenty-three years,
. ,nnd I expect, if my life and health are con-.
! tinned, to preach here twenty -three years
longer, although we will all do well to re
member that our breath is in our nostrils,
, and any hour we may be called to give an
account of our stewardship. AH we ask for
. the future is that you do your best, contrib-
' uting all you can to the support of our insti
tutions.: Our best days are yet to come: our
' greatest revivals of religion, and our might
iest outpourings of the Holy Ghost, we
have got through the Red sea and stand to
day on the other bank clapping the cymbals
of. victory, ' ' .
I 'Yes, twenty-three years have passed since :
a varus to nve in xirooKiyn, ana mey nave
been to me event! ul years. It was a pros
trated church to which I came, a church so i
Hat down it could drop no farther. Through
controversies which it would be useless to
VahnoMlb it- T. fl . rr fill ninli nviAf i H 1 m. n
f v." v i au u if as " uiu cAuiuvi nuu t-yji n
long while it had been without a pastor.
... But nineteenmembers could be mustered to
eign a call for my coming. ,
-is e wujiuiiicd nan uuiiii buav uui utr-
: fore me in an upper 'room in my house in
Philadepbia, there were two other commit
tees on similar errands from ot&er churches
. in other rooms, whom my wife was- enter-
taming and keeping apart from unhappy
collision. : The auiitorium of the Brooklyn
church to which I came detied all the laws
ofacousticE; the church ha l a steeple that
was the densiou of the town, and a high
box pulpit whicn shut in the preacher as
though he were dangerous to be let loose,
or it acted as a barricade that was unneces
sary to keep back the people, for they were
so tew that a minister ot ordinary muscie
could have kept back all who were there.
, My first Sabbath in Brooklyn was a Bid
day, for I did not realize how"far the church
.we s down until then, and qu the evening of
that day my own brother, through whose
pocket l entered the ministry, died, and the
, tidings of his decease reached me at 0 o'clock
in the evening;, and I was to preach at half
past seven. But from that day the blessing
of Ood was on urf, and in three months we
began the enlargement of the building. Be
fore the close ot that year we resolved to
construct the first Tabernacle. It was to be
a temporary structure, and therefore we
called it a Tabernacle instead of a Temple.
"What should be the style of architecture
was the immediate question. 1 bad always
thought that the ampitheatrical shape would
be appropriate for a church.
"Two distinguished architects were em
ployed, and after mucn hovering over de-
signs they announced to us, that such a
building was impossible for religious pur
poses, as it would not be churchly, and
would subject themselves and us to ruinous
criticism; in other words, they were not
ready for a revolution m church archi
tecture, Utterly disheartened as to my
favorite style of architecture, J said to the
trustees, ".Build anything you please,: and I
must be satisfied." But one morning a
young architect appeared at my house and
askedif we had yet selected a plan for our
church." I said, "No, and what we want we
cannot get." "What kind of building do you
wantf be asked. And taking out a lead
pencil and a letter envelope from my pocket,"
1 in less than a minute by a few curved lines
J indicated in the rough what we wanted.
"But," I said, "old architects tell us it can't
t dore, and there is no use in you taring.5"'.
' i3 said, "I can do it. How Jong can I have
. make out the plansP I said, "This even
- ot 8 o'clock everything is to be decided."
t S o clock of that evening the architect .
. nted bis plants and the bids of builder
i mason were presented, and in five min
v, i a after the plans were presented they
were unanimously adopted. So that J.
would not be in the way of the trustees dur
ing the worie I went to Europe, and when I
j?(it back the caurch was well nigh done,
iiut there came in a staggering hindrance.
U exiK-ctei to pay for the new church by
th v(U. of the old building. The old one
brvt ix'i: sold, um jusi at the time we must
have tn; money' the purchasers -backed out
pnu w 1 "' -id t or j rhuiT'-.i'sand no money.
t:,ibelo Uoi aud tba indomitable
and uhparatle'e I energy of our trustees
tbera and there one of them present to-day,
but the most in a better worlds wd got .the
buildinir readv lor consecration, and on
September S5, 180, morning and evening
dedicatory services were held, and in the
nftefnotiu the children, with sweet and multi
tudinous voices, consecrated the place to
God. Twenty thousand dollars were raised
that day to piv a floating debt. In the
morning old Dr. Stephen H. Tyng, th
glory of the Episcopal Church and the
Chrysostom of the American pulpit, preached
a sermon which lingered in its gracioui
effecls as long a the btlildirt? stood. He
read enough out of the Episcopal prayer
dcok to Keep nimseii rroui being repri
mauded by his bishop for preaching at anon
Episcopal service; and we, although belong
ing to another denomination, responded with
heartiness, as ihotle-h wa wpi-4 hand t t ha
liturgy, "iJood Lord, deliver us!"
During the short time we occupied that
building we had a constant downpour of
jcngiuus ewaKening. nosannani Ten mil
lion years in heaven will have no power to
dim my memorv of the clnriona ti
had in the first Tabernacle, which, because
vi iw invasion oi the usual style of church
architecture, was called by some 'Talmage's
xiippoarome, ' Dy others, "Church or .the
tioij urcus," and by other mirthful nomen
clature. But it was a bunding perfect for
acoustics, ana stop a long enough to nave its
imitation in all the large cities of America
ana to completely revolutionise church archi
tecture. People saw that it wa the com
mon sense way of seating ah audience.
Instead of outtine them in an ansmlar
church, where ench one chiefiy saw th9 back
part of somebody else's head, the audience
were arranged in semicircle, so that they
could see one another's facas. ani the audi
torium was a great family circle seated
around a fireplace, which was the pulpit. It
was an iron structure, and re supposed fire
proof, but the insurance companies looked
it it, and after we had gone too far to stop
in its construction tney declined to Insure it
except for a mere nothing, declaring that,
being of iron, if the inflamraabla material
between the sheets of iron took fire no enrine
hose could play upon it. And they were
right. During those days we educated and
lent out from a lay college under our charge
wins twelve nunurea young . men and
women, many of them becoming evangelists
nd many of them becoming regularly or
dained preachers, and I meet them in all
parts of the land toilio; mightily for God.
One Sunday morning in December, 1S73, ,
the thermometer nearly down to zero. I was
on my way to church. There was an excite
ment in the street and much smoke in the
air. : Fire engines dashed past. But my
min i was on the sermon I was about to
preach, until some one rushed up and told
me that our church was going up in the same
kind of a chariot that Elijah took from the
banks ot the Jordan. That Sunday morn
ing tragedy, with its wringing of hands and
frozen tears on the cheeks of many thou
sands standing in the street, ani the crash
that shook the earth, is as vivid as thouzh
it were yesterday. But it was not a perfect
lOSS. .... 1 -'.
All are anxious to do something, and as
on such occasions sensible people are apt to
do unusual things, ne of the members, at
the risk of bis iff e, rushed in among the
fallen walls, mounted the pulpit and took a
glass of water from the table and brought it
In safety to the street. So you see it was
not a total loss. Within an hour from
many churches came kind invitations to. oc
cupy their buildings, and hanging against a
lamppost near the destroyed building, be
fore 13 o'clock that morning, was aboard
with the inscription. "The conexeiration of
Brooklyn Tabernacle will worship to-night
in Plymouth Church."
Air. Beecher made the oDeniner Draver.
which was full ot commiseration for me and
my homeless flock,and I preached that night
the sermon that 1 intended to preach that
morning in my own church, the text con
cerning the precious alabaster box broken
at the feet of Christ, and sure enough we
had one very precious broken that dav. We
were, as a church, obliterated. "But arise
and build," said many . voices. Another
architect took the amphitheatrical plan of a
church, which in the first iustance was nec
essarily somewhat rude, and developed it
into an elaborate plan that was immediately
adopted. ,
but bow to raise, the money for such an
expensive undertaking was the question
expensive not because of any senselesj
Wornment proposed, but expensive because
3f the immense siz3 of the building needed
to hold our congregation. It was at that
time when for years our entire country was
tuffering, not from a financial panic, but
from that long-continued financial depression
wbich all business men remember, as the
sloud hung heavy year after year and com
mercial establishments without number went
down. Through what struggles we passed
the eternal God and some brave souls to-day
remember; Many a time would I have glad
ly accepted calls to some other field,
but I could not leave the flock in the wilder
ness. ' 1 ,
At last, after, in the interregnum, having
worshiped in our beautiful Academy of
Music, on the morning of February 23, 1874,
the anniversarv of the Washington who con
quered' impossibilities and on the Sabbath
that always celebratas the resurrection. Dr.
Byron Sunderland, Chaplain of the United
States Senate, thrilled us through and
through with a dedicatory sermon from
Hagai ii., 9. "The glory of this house
shall be greater than that of the former,
laith the Lord of Hosts.',' The corner stone
of that building had been laid by the illus
trious and ' now enthroned Dr. Irenssus
Prime. On the platform on dedication day
at, among others, Dr. Dowline, of the Bap
tist Church, Dr. Crook, of the Methodist ,
Church, Mr. Beecher, of the Congregational
Church, and Dr. French, of the Presbyterian
Church. Hosannahl Another $35,000 was
raised on that day.
The following Sunday 328 souls were re
ceived into our communion, mostly on
confession of faith. At two other commu
nions over 500 souls joined at each one. At
another ingathering (528 souls entered this
communion, and so many of those gathered
throngs have already entered heaven that
we expect to feel at home when we get there.
Mv! myl Won't we be glad to see them
the men and women who stood by us in days
that were daric and days that were jubilant!
Hosannahl The work done in that church
on Schermerhorn street can never be
undone. "
What self sacrifices on the part of many,
who gave almost tijll the blood came ! W hat
hallelujahs! What victories I, What wed
ding marches played with full organ! What
baptismal What sacraments! What obse
quies! One of them on a snowy Sabbath
afternoon, when all Brooklyn seemed to
sympathize, and my eldest son, bearing my
own name, lay beneath the pulpit it the last
sleep, and Florence Rice Knox san?, and a
score of ministers on and around tie plat
form tried to interpret how it was best that
one who had just come to manhhoi, and
with brightest worldly prospects, stould be
taken and we left with a heart that will not
cease to acne unsu we meet wneie tear
never fall.
That second Tabernacle! What a Itupen-
dous reminiscence! But, if the Petes of my
text had known what an undertaking Vt is to
buili two tabernacles he would nonhave
proposed two, to say nothing of thrdeX'As
an anniversary sermon must nseds be sAne
what autobiographical. let m9 s?iy "I h$vo
Dot b-?en idle, ' Duriui; ta ytaading of tijsa
two Tabernacles fifty-two books, tinder as
many titles, made up from my writings
were published. During that time also I was
permitted to discuss all the great questions of
the day in all the great cities of this conti
nent, and io many of them many times, be
sides preaching and lecturing ninety-six
times in Englaud, Scotland and Ireland in
ninety-four days. ' .
During all that time, as well as sinc9, I
was engaged in editing a religions news
paper, believing that such A periodical was
capable of great Usefulness! and I have bead
a constant contributor to newspapers and
periodicals, Meanwhile all things had be
come easy in the Brooklyn Tabernacle. On
a Sabbath in October, 1889, I announced to
my congregation that I would in a few
weeks visit the Holy Land, and that the offi
cers of the church bad consented to my go
ing, and the wish of a life to me was about
to oe fulfilled.' The next Sabbath morning,
about 2 o'clock, or just after midnight, a
member of my household awakened me by
saying that there was a strange light in the
sky. A thunderstorm bad Iett the air full
of electricity, and from horlaon to horizon
everything seemed to blaze. But that did
not disturb me, until an observation taken
from the cupola of my house declared that
the second Tabernacle was putting on red
wings. . ;
I scouted the idea and turned over on the
pillow for another sleep, but a number of
excited voices called tie to the roof, and I
went up and saw clearly defined in the night
the fiery catafalque of our second Taber
nacle. When I saw that I said to my family
"I think that ends ray work in Brooklyn. ;
Surely the Lord will not call a minister to
build three churches in one city. The build
ing of one church generally ends the useful
ness of a pastor. How can any one preside
at the building of three churches?" But
before twenty-four hours had passed we
were compelled to cry out, with Peter of
my text, "Let us build three tabernacles."
We must have a home somewhere. The old
site had ceased to be the center of our con
gregation, and the center of the congrega
tion, as near as we could find it, is where we
now stand. '
Having selected the spot, should we build
on it a barn or a tabernacle, beautiful and
commodious? Our common sense, as well as
our religion, commanded the latter. But
what push, what Industry, what skill, what
sacrifice, what faith in God were necessary!
Impediments and hindrannaa wit.hnnfc num.
ber were thrown in the way, and had it not
been for the perseverance of our church offi
cials, and the practical help of many people,
and the prayers of millions of srond nul in
all parts of the earth, and the blessing of
aimigaty uoa, tne worn would not have
been done. But it . is done, and -all rood
people who behold the structure feel in their
hearts, if they do not utter it with their lips,
"How amiable are Thy tabernacles. O Lord
of Hosts P On the third Sabbath of last
April this church was dedicated. Dr. Hamlin.
of Washington, preaching an inspiring ser
mon, .Dr. Wendell Prime, of New York,
offering the dedicatory prayer, and some
fifteen clergymen during the day taking
part in the services. Hosannah! .
How suggestive to many of as are the
words spelled out In flowers above the pul
pit "18o9" and "1892" for those dates
bound what raptures, what griefs, what
struggles, what triumphs, l mention it as a
matter of Gratitude to God that in these
twenty-three years I have missed but one
Sabbath through physical indisposition, and
but three in the thirty-six years of rav min
istry: And now,, having reached this
twenty-third milestone, I start anew. I
have in my memorandum books analyses
of more sermons than I have ever yet
preached, and I have preached, as near as I
can tell, about 338 J. .
During these past years I have learned two
or three things. Among others I have
learned that "all things work JHgether for
good." My positive mode of preaching has
sometimes seemed to stir the hostilities of all
earth and hell. Feeling called upon fifteen
years ago to explore underground New York
city life, that I might report the evils to be
combated, I took with me two elders of my
church and a New York police commissioner
and a policeman, and I explored and re
ported the horrors that needed removal and
tne allurements tnat endangered our young
men. mere came upon me an outourscot
assumed indignation that frightened almost
everybody but myself. That exploration
put into my church thirty or forty, news
paper correspondents from north, south,
east and west: which opened for me new
avenues in which to preach the Gospel that
otherwise would never have been opened.
Years passed on and I preached a series
of sermons on Amusements, and a false re
port ot what I did say ana one of the ser
mons said to have been preached by me was
not mine in a single word roused a violence
that threatened me with poison and dirk
and pistol and other forms of extinguish
ment, until the chief of Brooklyn , police.
without any suggestion from me. took pos
session of the church with twenty-four po
licemen to see that no barm was done. That
excitement opened many doors, which I en
tered for preaching the Gospel.
After awhile came an ecclesiastical trial.
in which I was arraigned by people who did
1 - 1 .i T J .' I .1 . . , ill L. T
uos jute vui way x aiix wings, ana aiouousju
was acquitted of all the charges, the contest
shook the American church, . That battle
made me more f Hands than anythinz that
ever happened and gave me Chistendom and
more than Christendom for my weekly
audience. On the demolition of each church
we got a better and a larger church, and not
a disaster, not a caricature, not a persecu
tion, not an assault, during alt the33 twenty
three years, but turned out for our advan
tage, and ought I not to believe that "all
things work together for good?" Hosannah !
Another lesson I have learned during these
twenty-three years is that it is not necessaity
to preach error or pick flaws in the old
Bible in order to get an audience; the old
Book without any fixing up is good enough
for me, and the higher criticism, as it is
called, , means lower religion. Higher
criticism is another form of infidelity, and
its disciples will believe less and less, until
many of them will land in Nowhere and
become the worshipers of an eternal What
is it." The most of these higher oritics seem
to be seeking notoriety by pitching into the
Bible It is such a brave thing to strike
your grandmother. The old Gospel put in
modern phrase, and without any of the
conventionalities, and adapted to an tne
wants and woes of humanity, I have found
the mightiest magaet, and we have never
lacked an audience. ,
Next to the blessing of my own family I
account the blessing that have always had
great multitude of people to preach to.
That old Gospal I have preached to you
these tweuty-three years of my Brooklyn
pastorate, and that old Gospel I will preach
till I die, and charge my son, who is on ths
way to the mini try, to preach it after me,
for I rememb it' haul's tnunderbolt, "If any
man preach aay othsr Gospel, let him be
accursed. An J now. as i stana nereonmy
twenty-third anniversary, I see two audi
ences. The one is made up of all those who
have worshiped with us in the past, but have
been translated to higher realms.
What groups of children too fair and too
sweet and too lovely for earth, and the Lord
took them, but they seem present to-oay.
The croup has gone out ot tae swollen tnroat
and the pallor irom the cows, and they have
on then the health and radianca of heaven.
Hail, groups of glorified ctmdren! How glad
1 am to have you com back to us to-dav!
And here sit those aged ones, who departed
this life leaving ad awful vacancy in home
and church. Where are your staffs and where
are your gray locks, and where yon stooping
shoulders, ye blessed old folks? "Oh ?' they
say, . "we are all young again, and
the bath in the river from under the throne
has made us agile and bouuding. In the
place from which we come they use no staffs,
but scepters 1" Hail, fathers and mothers in
Israel; how glad we are to have you come
back to greet us. But the other audience I
see in imagination is made up of all those to
whom we nave had opportunity as a church,
directly or indirectly, of presenting the
Gospel. Yea, all my parishes seem to come
back to-day. The people of my first charge
id Belleville, New Jersey. The people of my
second charge in Syracuse, New York. The
people Of my third charge in Philadelphia.
And the people of all these three Brooklyn
Tabernacles. Look at them, and all those
whom, through the printing press, we have
invited to God and heaven, now seaming to
sit in galleries above galleriej, fifty gallleries,
a hundred galleries, a thousand galleries
high.
I greet them all in your name , and in
Christ's name,- all whom I have confronted
from my first sermon in my first village
charge, where my lips trembled and my
knees knocked together from affright,speak
ing from the text, Jeremiah L, 6, "Ah, Lord
God, behold I cannot speak, for I am a
child "until the sermon I preach to-day from
Luke ix., 3d, "Let us make three taber
nacles," those of the past and the present, all
gather in imagination, if not in reality, all
of us grateful to God for past mercies, all of
us sorry for misimproved opportunities, all
hopeful for eternal raptures, and while the
visible and the invisible audiences of the
present and the past commingle, I give out
to be sung by those who are here to-day, and
to be sung by those who shall read of this
scene of reminiscence and congratulation,
that hymn which has been rolling on since
Isaac Watts started It one hundred and fifty
years ago ,
Oar God. oar help in ages past,
Onr hope for years to come;
Our shelter from the stormy tl tit,
And oar eternal boue.
EMPEROR FREDERICK,
1 Pretty Story of tne Great Soldier Told
by One of the German Papers.
A pretty story of the late Emperor
Frederick is told in one of the Ger
tuan papers. Some years ago, shortly
before the death of the old Emperor
Dt Germany, a tall, handsome gentle
man jumped into a third-class carriage
of a local rail way at Berlin, Just as
the train was leaving the station.
An old flower seller, with a basket of
newly-cut hyacinths, was th only
other occupant of the compartment,
lie asked the old dame to sell him a
bunch, and, mollified by his 6uave
manner, ahe chose the freshest and '
largest, and handed it to him. Its
price was a penny, but as the gentle-
mati had no coppers and . the old
woman no change, not having sold
any of her goods yet, 6hewas paid
with a mark piece, which, as she said
at once, was a thing that had never
been heard of before in a third-class
carriage. '
Presently the stranger and - the
flower seller were deep in conversa
tion and it turned out that the poor
woman was the. only breadwinner of a
family of four. Her son was crippled,
her ; granddaughter a little school
girl, and her husband had for 6ome
months past been out of work, since
a new railway official had dismissed
him as being too old to do much
work. The stranger then suggested
that she should apply, on her hus
band's behalf, to the railway authori
ties. "That is no good whatever,"
she replied, as she wiped her tears
with her apron. "If yeu haven't the
Tope for your cousin nowadays, you
can't get anybody to listen to you. " .
"Try the Emperor," the stranger went
on. "Alas!" she sighed, "if the old
gentleman was allowed to see the
petitions that are sent, it might do
some good, but he does not get to
know about us poor people."
"Well, then, let your husband write
to the crown prince.? "Yes," she
said, "he might do that," and she
would tell him so as soon as sho had
sold her flowers. '; By this time the
train had got to the terminus. The
old dame bundled out her basket and?
noticed with astonishment that the
officials and , the crowd on' the plat
form looked at her carriage and salut
ed and cheered. "What's up?" she
asked. "Why, the crown prince was
in the same compartment with you."
Then the flower seller held her head
high and told every syllable of what
had happened to the delighted crowd:
Her flowers were sold before five min-.
utes were over, and a fortnight after
ward her husband was at work again
again in his old place.
Seed. ' r
Timothy seed is very small, and it
is easily destroyed in the ground if
too deeply covered. Early in the
spring the ground should be har
rowed fine, and the seed broadcasted
on the surface, to be slightly brushed
in. It is better to broadcast the seed
if the field is expected to have an
evenly . covered appearance, as drill
ing not only covers the- seed ; too
much but causes it to come up too
thickly Jo some plascs and too spar
ingly in others. '
ihe "greatest curse in the world U
jealousy. Nine out of ten domestic
troubles originate in it. More than
half the murders in the world aro
committed through its influence. It
is a guest that no man or woman who
ever entertained, could afterward
get rid of. Institutes should bo
opened to cure those afflicted with it,
for it ruins more homes than drink.
It is the shadow that' follows lovo,
and the happier and more blessed
the love makes you, the darker a" 1
juore cursed the cloud of jealousy v,
lcavcvou.
BUDGET OF FON;
HTJMOUOUS SKETCH ES XROM
' i VARIOUS SOURCES.
Up and Doing Old Ttbbits In Race
A Few Left He Said No 31 ore
A Felicitous Piece of '-Busl-
nese," Etc., Etc.
The advice to be up and doins
is all very well in its way. .
If we are the right pur mm;
And our deeds bear the light of day;
A better preempt we cannot keep
If we're busy with honest labor.
But 'tis better, far, to be fast asleep
Than be up and doing your neighbor.
. Yarmouth Begister.
' OLD TIBB1TS I3t A RAGE.
"That fellow ought to be kicked to
death by a jackass and I'd like to be the
one to do it." Life. '
A FEW LEFT. . V
Rickets "Does Mr. Small keep many
boarders now?" ; s
Hunker "Ob, yes; but some manage
to escape now and then." Puck.
HE SAID NO MORE. "
Cobwigger (irritably) -"Why don't
you give that child what he is crying
for?". ' '
Mrs. Coswigger "Well, he's crying
for the moon." New York Sun.
. , A JUDGE OF BABIES.
Miss Giddiguah -"Mr. Crusty, did
you see the Cooingtoa baby! Do tell me
how it looked 1"
. Old Crusty "Um ah! It. is quite
small, clean shaven, red faced, and
looks like a hard drinker." Puck.
A HIDDEN ACCUSATION. ,
"Binx had a row in a restaurant yes
terday. "How did it happen?"
"He told the clerk in the presence of
several customers he wanted to pay for :
the milk he had chalked up yesterday. n
A FELICITOUS PIECK OF "BUSINESS."
Playwright "From the nature of my
play you see it ought to close with some
line or significant act from the hero in
perfect accord with the feelings of an
audience." '
Critic "Why not let him heave a
sigh of relief ?" Judge.
JUST A FAMILY SPAT.
Prattle (to his wife) "You don't
seem to have the courage of your con
victions." '
Mrs. Prattle "I'd like to know how
you get at tho conclusion."
Prattle -"You say, 'There's no use
talking,' nnd then you talk some more."
THAT DEEP LAID PLOT.
1 Seeker "So your friend Dumbleton
has written a novel, eh?"
Sageman "He has, for a fact."
Seeker "What is his plot?"
Sageman "His plot seems to have
been to inveigle the public into buying
a book that isn't worth reading." Bos
ton Courier.
A RESEMBLANCE.
"Alderman McBoodle is a fine looking
man, ain't he?" said a friend of ours the
other day. ' "
"Yes," replied another, "I was taken
for hita once." ; -,-.:.;
"You? Why care for that? I was
taken for him. I went on his bail bond
and was takeu for him by the Sheriff."
A VALUABLE FAMILY RELIC.
Billiatus "I have taken a fancy .to
that cane you sport, Gilliaas. Would
you sell jt?"
Gilhams "Wouldn't dispose of it for
any consideration. . It's an old family
heirloom; my great-grandfather used to
belabor my great-grandmother with it."
Jeweler's Circular.
FASHION'S STERN BEHEST.
Grafton "Awfully clever . fellow,
Gagley. He might shine in society if it
wasn't for his own infirmity." -
Miss Clara "Why, I always thought
; ho was correct in his habits.
: Grafton "Oh, yes, he is all that, you
know; but his neck's so deucedly short
that he always has to wear a turn down
collar." Brooklyn Life.
A PRUDENT MINISTER.
"What salary can you pay me?' asked
the minister, addressing the senior dea
con of the church to which he had been
called. ' ;
"Well, bow much can you get along
with?"
"I can get along with $500 if you
don't give donation parties to the
minister,, but if you give donation parties
you'll have to make it $750. "New York
Vress. v .
A GENTLE REMINDER
Bingo "Did those trousers of mine
come from the tailor's?"
Mrs. Bingo "No, my dear, but my
bonnet came from the milliner's."
Bingo (savagely) "What do I care?
I should like to know what your bonnet
got to do with my trousers?"
Mrs. Bingo (meekly) "Nothing, my
dear, only the milliner is waiting to see
you in the next room." New York
Truth.
A SERIOUS INTEURrPTTON. -
Toni-rllWhcn I eaw you at Minnie's
wedding I thought that you should havo
been the groom yourself, old man."
Jack "I did come very near marry
ing that girl once. I was calling there) :
and about half-past twelve I braced up
and commenced a proposal; and' just
then her father came into the parlor." . ,
Tom "That was awkward." ;
Jack "I should say so; he put me
completely out! "Detroit Free Press.
GRANDILOQUENT.
Launcelot "Be assured,' Ella, that
the love my heart holds for you ia of no
evanescent nature. " It ia bound to my
life with ties that will endure while
consciousness endure?. , It is an ever-,
present a lingering love."
Ella "That's just the trouble, Launce
lot. There's too much linger about it.
If you could contrive to evanesce about
10 p. M. pa might let up on his design
to effect your involuntary sortie.''
Boston Courier.
A BOY TO BE WATCHED.
Wooden "What's this idea of yours
of putting new locks on everything in
tbe office?" - . '
Bulfinch "Well, I thought I should
feel easier."
Wooden "What made you think
that?" '
Bulfinch "Well, you see, I told the
office boy he could take yesterday after
noon off and go to the ball game, and he
said: 'Thank you, sir; I accept the half
holiday, but, if you please, I will not go
to the ball park; I have Jong wanted to
dust all the top shelves and wash the
windows, and this will give me just the
chance.' " Boston Courier. . ,
LEGAL LEVITY.
The late Sir Thomas Chambers was
not a wit, and laughter seldom entered
the court over which he presided! so
solemnly. There is, however, one good
story, told of him in the Temple.", It is
to the effect that a prisoner, who was un
defended, pleaded "guilty," and counsel
having been instructed to defend , him at
the last moment, withdrew the plea and
substituted that of "not guilty," with the
result that the jury acquitted him. In
discharging the prisoner, Sir Thomas ia
said to have remarked :r
"Prisoner, I do not envy you your feel
ings. On your own confession you are a
thief, and the jury have found that yoa
are a liar," London Star.
Cooking as a Science. , v
"Cooking is as much a science as
chemistry," said Miss Parloa to Foster
Coates recently. "It is of the first im
portance that every woman who is to have
the direction and care of a- household,
whether large or small, should know how
best to use money for what is wholesome
anr nnlAtnhl and understand the man
ciples upon which s food can be most
economically cooked. No woman Should
be considered as less accomplished or re
fined because she has given considerable
attention, to household duties, and can,
if neod be, prepare a dinner better, than
the ; average hired cook.-. Mistresses
ought to be in every respect the superiors
of their servants instead of being at their
mercy, as they too of ten unfortunately
are. - ,
"Every woman ought to study domes
tic science. . She may be so placed later
as to have no occasion to avail herself of
the information acquired, but she will
have lost nothing by her effort, to gain
the knowledge ;; for this homely branch
is really all-important; since 'it affects
the body, the mind, the purse and the
morals of the family. . Where you find a
high order of cooking, you will find also
refinement in other respects. While
we, as a people, ought to live better
than any , other nation, . we live
too many of - us on repetitions of
poor dishes,; and the waste in
preparing them is something that pains
one who stops to consider it. A French
peasant, with nothing more at command
than many an American housewife would
look upon as absolutely valueless, can
set forth a most appetizing though sim
ple meal, : solely because of superior
knowledge of the way to cook food, and
a natural ability to give the dishes just,
the right flavor. ' i :
"There ought to be somewhere in the
United States a normal school of cookery
where teachers could be trained for their
work, and in every town there should
be a room where girls could be sent at
least once a week from the public schools
to learn the first principles of cleanliness
and of cooking. Such a course would
surely decrease the percentage of, crim
inala and paupers, for unclean homes
and " improper food have much to do
with the filling of - prisons and alms
houses. It seems as if the Government
could not forever be blind to its own in
terest in this matter.: Some day a de-
tnand may be made for such schools on
the score of humanity." Mail and Ex
press. A Blind Black Eel. V '
Mr. V. N. Edwards of the United
States Fish Commission, has obtained
from Cuttyhunk Pond a very, singular
cel. The eyes are entirely concealed un
der the skin and the color is uniformly
dark, almost black. Ia form and pro
portions it is like the common: eel, and
may prove to be merely a darkjeolored,
blind example of this species. Trout
and other fish become dark in color as
a result of blindness, and this msy be
another illustration of the phenomenon
which is often observed by fish cultur
ists, The lengtSi of he specimen is
about thirteen incUcs,
I