.1 THE- Jk.fi EXCELLENT ) ADVERTISING MEDIUlj Official Organ of Washington County. FIRST OP ALL THE NEWS. Circulates extensively in the Counties 1 , WashingtoiLHirtiflK Tyrrell in J BsaafsuiJ Jcb Printing In HsYariout Branchs $. l.OO A TSAR IX ADVANCE. "FOR GOD, FOR COUNTRY, AND FOR TRUTH." SINGLE COPY, 5 CENT. VOL. X. PLYMOUTH, N. C, FRIDAY," MAY 10, 1899. NO. 35. THE TWO DOLLS. Patd the Tlnk Paper Doll to the Purple Taper Doll, "Oh! how I wish that I were made of wood!" , Said the Purple Paper Doll to the rink Paper Doll, "I'm sure I think that paper's just a3 Kood." Said the rink Paper Doll to the Purple Paper Doll, "Oh! how I wish that I were made of wax!" Said the Purple Paper Doll to the Pink Paper Doll, "Your face would soon be seamsd with tiny cracks." Bald the Pink Paper Doll to the Purple Paper Doll, "Oh! how I wish I were made of bisque!" Said the Purple Paper Doll to the Pink Paper Doll, "Of breaking you would run an awful risk." Bald the Pink Paper Doll to the Purple Paper Doll, "Oh! how I wish I were of worsted knit!" Paper Doll, "i don't Beueve you a nice ic, aear, a dk. Said the Pink Paper Doll to the Purple Paper Doll, "Oh! how 1 wish that I were made of rags!" Bald the Purple raper Don to the rint Paper Doll, "Then the junkman 'd carry you ofT in his bags." Said the Pink Paper Doll to the Purple Paper Doll, "Oh! how I wish that I were made of rub- ber! Said the Purple Paper Doll to the Pink Paper Doll, "We used to know one, and we used to snub her." Said the Pink Paper Doll to the Purple Paper Doll. "Oh! how I wish I were made of china!" 5atd the Purple Paper Doll to the Pink Paper Doll, "You'd be old-fashioned, and they'd name you Dinah." Said the Pink Paper Doll to the Purple Paper Doll, "Well, then I'm clad that I'm a DaDer doll!" , Said the Purple Paper Doll to the Pink Paper Doll, "I think it ls4he best, dear, after all!" Carolj n Wells, in Puck. I DEACON GREY'S CHOICE. . i PV HFI.PN WH1TNRV CLACK. . "Well," Mrs. Ferobia Cymonds laid aside ber new poke-bonnet, with its lavender ribbons, aud slipped off her plum-colored alpaca dress, while a simile of satisfaction spread itself over her rather sharply marked feature's. "If Deacon Grey don't mean some thing by his attentions then I'm mis taken." It was prayer meeting liiht, and Deacon Grey had jolt escorted the widow to her domicile. "This is the third time hand-running that he. took me home evening; beside last . Sunday was two weeks ago that he walked to chinch with me." Mrs. Ferobia's method of expres . sion was somewhat mixed, but her facts were undeniable. The deacon had escorted her to and from, evening prayer meeting on several occasions, and had thus be come the subject of much gossip among the village folks. "Deacon Grey's aspvucin' up, "they eaid. "Lookin' rouud for a wife, of course. Wal, he mout do worse, though the Widow Cymonds is poor as a church-mouse, fur as property's ;onsarned." They said nothin' of Widow Cy ionds temper, however, which was as uncomfortable to encounter as the barbed-wire fence which surrounded q deacon's well-kept farm, . Possibly, the -widow had a talent for concealing any little acerbities of tern : per from tb,e outside world, and be I' stowing her ill-nature only ou the members of her own household. "Yes," she mused, tapping the home-made carpet with her foot, while a shrewd look shone in her steel-gray eyes "yes, to my mind it's just as good as settled, and I mean to do over my wedding-dress. I ain't worn it nuch,and it'll save buying a new one. , B(ut there's one thing about it" here ihe widow put her foot down emphat ically "that old maid sister of the deacon's has got to do most of the work, if she lives with us. I don't hae any shiftless, do-nothing folks about me; but of course I won't say a word now." . VLa!" aid Miss Letitia Pipes, pop ping her head into the widow's sitting-room, "bright and early the next morning "la, now, Feroby! is it set tled yet? I'm dyiug to know!" "Well ahem!" said the widow, looking conscious and trying to blush ame ain't set, but it's all understood between us, you know." "Of course," assented Miss Pipes. "Well, I reckoned it was understood, 41of rrtn nra oa onnfl as ATiffofrod. nf course. How soon do you think it'll be?" "Well," said the widow, medita tively," not before fall, I don't reckon. You see, I've got a "ight smart lot of sewing on hand and some quilting to do, tocv There's that piny-bud quilt I put to'.ttlier last winter, and a rising-sun Dorcas is making." . "Going to keep Dorcas with you? rucrl Ihn widow tartly Dorcas was her stepdaugkttv "She ain't nothing to me, an' I shan't keep her no longer than to git the sewing done up, an' the apple-butter making an' preserving over; then I'm a-going to tell her to find some other home." "Jes' so," assented Miss Pipes. And before night it was all over town that the Widow Cymonds was to be married to Deacon Grey,. in the fall just as Mrs. Cymonds meant it should be. And at last the gorgeous piney-bud and the refulgent glories of the rising sun were nearly finished and laid away in the big, old-fashioned chest of drawers in the best chamber. A ten-gallon keg was filled with translucent; crimson-clear apple-butter, and the swinging-shelf in the cel lar was covered with jars of preserves and amber-lined jelly all made by Dorcas Cymonds' deft fingers. And now the sparkling frosts of October had turned the dogwood and sassafras leaves to red, and the ekin capins and over-cup acorns were drop ping on the crisp, brown grass in the woodlands and now pretty, brown eyed, industrious Dorcas was told that she must find another home, and look out for herself in the great future. . "For I expect to be married before long, and shan't want to be burdened with any hangers-on, "said the widow, heartlessly. Tears sprang into the sweet, brown, eyes, but Dorcas turned away to hide them from her stepmother's sharp gaze. Poor Dorcas! She knew no more of the wide world and its ways than a half-fledged robin, but she started out with a brave heart to seek her fortune. One text from the Book of Divine Revelations came into her heart to comfort her "I have never seen the righteous forsaken, nor his sa 3d beg ging bread;" and somehow Dorcas felt that kind Providence had not forsaken her. Mrs. Cymonds put on her best dress, tied her lavender bonnet-striugs in a becoming bow under her chin, and looked at herself in the mirror with a smile of satisfaction. "He'll be certain to come to the sewing-society today, and who knows what may happen, as we walk home together! My, but won't Letitia Pipes be mad! She almost turns green with envy now, when the deacon walks with me."' But Deacon Grey did not make his appearance at the sewing-circle, and the widow returned home in a some what different mood from that in which she had set out. "What in common sense he means by not coming I don't see!" she said, crabbedly. "And that Letitia Pipes was glad of it looked like she wanted to titter right out, when I had to put on my bonnet and start home alone." The afternoon bad worn away, and the sun was sinking fiery shafts of crimson beneath the far-off western horizon. "Who in creation's a-coming now?" grumbled the vidow,as a lithe,slender figure swung open the front gate, and tripjedup the path to the cottage door. It was Dorcas, her brown eyes shin ing and her cheeks glowing like a full blown Jacqueminot rose. "Back again, like a bad penny!" cried the widow, crossly. "You'll have to stay all night, I' s'pose; but I've told you once I couldn't keep you and I can't!" "I've only come for my things," said Dorcas, demuredly, her cheeks dimpled with smiles and blushes. "The deacon's out in the buggy wait ing for ru?. " "The deacon?" gasped the widow, astounded. "Yes. I I'm married to Deacon Grey," exclaimed Dorcas, while her stepmother glowed in wrath and dis may. "I met him at the stile, this morning, and I think he married me out of pity, for I was crying a little, you know, to think I had no home tc go to. So he took me to the parson age and we were married, and went home to dinner. And here's the dea con coming in now for my trunk." "Well, well!" exclaimed Mis3 Letitia Pipes, when she heard the news. "But a body might a-known it was Dorcas the deacon was a-courting. But I'll bet a button Feroby is as mad as a we hen about it!" And so she was. Saturday Night. Men With Bird Names, The following coincidence in names have been carefully verified. At s Birmingham chapel Mr. Book held services in the morning, Mr. Parrott in the afternoon and Mr. Crowe in the evening of the same day; the arrange ment being strictly accidental, but made by a Mr. Cuckoo, secretary ol the Sunday school, in which Messrs. Finch, Martin, Swallow and Bird were teachers. In a Midland town ou the same Sunday some years ago harvest festi val services were conducted in twe churches, respectively, by Bevs. J. E.' Flower and W. Leafe. Within the last half century the pastor of a Lon don church was Rev. J. H. Pigg, and his two deacons Messrs. Hogg and Bacon. London Tit Bits. Billboard advertisements are posted in some places by machiuea that reach to the top of a fifty foot wall without BURIAL OF KAIULANI. SEVEN DAYS OF WEIRD MOURNING OVER HAWAII'S PRINCESS. Old Cmtomi Revived A Waving of l'luuies and Chanting; of Lamentations Over the Casket Midnight Ktmoval of the Body Hearse Drawn by Natives. The remains of Princess Kaiulani now rest in the tomb in Hawaii, where lie the bodies of all the Kamehame has, except the great Kaniehameha, who was buried, like Moses, no man knows where. The funeral took place on Sunday and fully 25,000 people at tended it. It is Hawaii's supersti tion that the death of a member of the royal family is accompanied by the severest rainfall of the year. TI19 con ditions attending the death and burial of Kaiulani bore out the superstition. The raiu began falling iu torrents after she died and continued until after she was buried. The hours of the funeral, however, were bright and clear. All that the military and civic pomp of civilization could add to the strange old Hawaiian funeral customs went to make the ceremony oue not easily forgotten. lor nearly seven days there was not an instant when some ceremony was not in progress. Soon after her death kahili bearers began waving royal kahilis or feather plume ? over her body. Every bearer, whether a man or a woman, wore the yellow feather cape, which was a sign of Hawaiian royalty. The bearers stood rigidly erect and the waving of the plumes was done according to a for mula from which it was a point of honor not to vary. At the beginning each bearer held his kahili in the "Carry arms!" position. At a sigDal the kahilis were extended in a hori zontal position till they touched tips with those on the opposite sitje of the casket. Each bearer then waved his kahili to the right, then to the left, repeating each motion, and then hold ing the plumes aloft, finally returning to the first position again. During the week several kahili bearers faiuted from sheer exhaustion. The body lay in state at Ainahiu until the Friday preceding the funeral and was theu removed to the Kawai alias church. The ceremony of re moval was weird. It took place iu the middle of the night. The sky was , heavily overcast and threatened rain. Kahili bearers walked beside the hearse, waving aloft torches made of oily kukui nuts, spitted on bamboo poles. Following the hearse came members of the royal family in car riages, then friends, old servants and retainers. Among the last were many Mele women, who hand dowu from generation to generation the histori cal chants reciting the valor, great deeds and history of the Hawaiian people. They wailed and chanted throughout the journey to the church. Others wailed in cadence, while some of the old servants broke out in la mentations and expressions of per sonal grief. The darkness, the weird light of torches, the absence of the constraiuingpresenceofthe white man and the white man's customs, revived in many of the old Hawaiians thoughts and feelings of earlier days, and they broke into hula hula songs and dances according to the ancient custom, which has latterly fallen into disuse since the hula has become discredited. At the church, a short service was held and finished at 2 o'clock in the morning. The church decorations were in sympathy with the customs on such occasions. Throughout Saturday rain t'ell in tor rents, but the remains weie viewed by thousands. After the funeral the quiet of the scene was broken by chants or by wailing and lamentations of old servants of the priucess, who recited incidents of her life. Their words were extemporaneous, spoken in a chanting, melodious way, some times accompanied by a swaying of the body, which , was kept up until the speakers dropped from sheer phy sical exhaustion. The services on Sunday were those of the Anglican church. The funeral procession was led by the marshal of the republic, A. H. Brown, his depu ties and a . company of mounted po lice. Then followed members of the royal family, civil " officials, foreign consuls, representatives of societies and the clergy, including the Catholic bishop. The hearse was drawn by 230 natives, uniformed in white trous ers, blue sweaters, white hats and blue and yellow cloth capes. From the church to the tomb is two miles, but the entire distance was lined with spectators. The services at the tomb were very simple. The coffin was placed next to that containing the body of Princess Likelike, Kaiu laui's mother, aud near that of Kala kaua. The Usefulness of Hickory. Hickory has its place in carriage building that has never yet been dis placed by any other wood or artificial substitute. For light spokes it has no equal. Ironwood and lancewood are used in its place for heavy spokes, where the weight is of less importance than the strength and cost. But for light buggies and carriages hickory spokes must be used for years to come, as it has been in the past. Forest ash sometimes takes its place, but the re- eult is never s-j satisfactory. "BY-PRODUCTS." How Chemists and Other Ingenious Per. sons Make Use of Waste. To such an extent has the utilization, of by-products been carried in the stockyards of Chicago that now the only waste in a steer is the gastric juice.and what was formerly the waste is now worth more than the meat. The horns go into knife handles or backs for combs. The white hoofs are sent abroad to return as ivory, while the black hoofs become handles for knives and canes and are made into a dozen other things, the soft internal parts being resolved into jellies and candies. From the bones are produced piano keys, dice and bone-black. Glue, gelatine, neat's-foot oil, and au imita tion whalebone are made from the sinews. The clarified blood is taken by the sugar refiners, while the rest of it becomes buttons and fertilizers. The intestines serve as casings for sausage, and the bladders as cases for snuff. The tail tuft is an insiguificant part of the animal, but when steamed, dried and washed it becomes a curled hair that sells readily. As a result of this care and economy, the fiauacial returns from a steer, as estimated by one in the business, are: From the meats and compounds of meat, $10; from the hide, hair, horns and hoofs, $25; from the fats, blood, sinews and bones, $15; from all other waste, $15, or $55 received from the by-products. But not alone in the stockyards are by-products carefully husbanded. Many large industrial corporations employ chemists to search for by products with a view to increased pro fits and reduced waste. The produc tion of alcohol from waste molasses is well known, and the recent conver sion of pig-iron slag into cement has been noted. To these may be added tiling made from crushed tree bark, acids from plum and peach pits, jellies and an inferior kind of champagne from apple cores, pruasiate of potash from castaway shoes, carbonic acid gas generated in the processes oi beerl making, and window weights from the iron recovered from" tin cans. More notable, perhaps, are some products f.vom corn. Indian maize contains a kernel in which there is a yellow germ. Under chemical treat ment this germ yields an oil which, , when refined, is a competitor with cotton-seed oil in the substitution for olive oil, arid which may be vulcanized and made to do duty as rubber. What are called rubber boots and shoes are being made from this imitation rubber at a cost far below that of the genuine article. The Manufacturer. Gave the Ilequired Information. The old practice of badgering wit nesses has almost disappeared from many courts,,but in some it is still kept up sometimes, however, to the damage of the cross-examiner. Lawyer S is well known for his uncomely habits. He cuts his hair about four times a year, and the rest of the time looks decidedly ragged about the ears. He was making a witness describe a barn which figured in his last case. "How long had the barn been built?" . . "Oh, I don't know. About a year mebby. About nine months, p'r'aps. " "But jut how long? Tell the jury how long it ha 1 been built." "Well, I don't know exactly. Quite a while." "Now, Mr. B , you pass for an intelligent farmer, and yet you can't tell how old this barn is; and you have lived on the next farm for ten years. Can you tell me how old your own barn is? Come, now, tell us how old your own house is, if you think you know." Quick as lightning the old farmer replied "Ye want to know how old my house is, do ye? Well, its just about as old as you be, and the roof needs seeiug to about as bad." In the roar that followed the wit ness stepped down, and Lawyer S didn't call him back. Waverly Maga zine. The Evolution of the flow. Taking the plow, which is oue of the most important, if not the most important agricultural implement, at the time of the enactment of the first patent law in this country, in 1791, the plow was a wooden structure shod with iron, and it was so imperfect that but an acre of land could be plowed in a day, and even then it was not much more than scratched. The plow had hardly been improved at all in forty centuries. Now, the steel plow, with its greater strength aud its perfected shape, digs down and overturns the soil so that a much larger crop is grown, and several times as much work can be done in a day with the ordinary one-horse plow as with the old form; while a steam driven gang plow can plow twenty acres in the same length of time. Earned Money by Starving A professional faster, named Succi, has just completed a term of absolute abstinence lasting twenty-five days in Milan, Italy. He was walled up iu a stone hut, iu which he was under con stant surveillance through two strong glass windows, which were closed under seals. John Bull isn't easily coved. HOW A MAN KEPT HOUSE LEARNED THE TRICK DURINC A FIVE YEAR STUNT IN THE ARMY. fie Concealed That Fact From His Wife, However Once They Lost Their Ser vant and the Cavalryman Filled the Hill and Made a Clean Breast of It. The young man had never told his wife that he had done a five-year stunt in the regular army of the United States. Without any particular rea son for it some men feel a bit shy mentioning their service in the regu lars. Perhaps the fact that, up to about ten years ago, the army was looked upon as the last resource of the ne'tr-do-well, may have some thing to do with it. Anyhow this young war department clerk didn't happen to mention it to the girl when he came to Washington a couple of years ago and courted and married her, relates the Washington Star, that he had spent almost a five-year stretch among the yellow, blasted-looking mountains of Arizona, helping his tro p to hunt for the elusive Apache Kid. He told her that he had been jamming around down in the south west, and he told the truth, for if hunting that red rascal of an Apache wasn't jamming around the southwest then nothing is. She considered it odd that he knew so much about sol diering, that he went around the house on Sunday mornings idly whistling the trumpet calls, and that he knew how to spiel Indian talk that Indians understood. Or course, she never stopped to wonder over his habit of going down stairs sideways. She never thought of him as a sol dier, and 8.0 she could not know that all men who have been cavalrymen invariably go down stairs sideways for the remainder of their lives. It is a habit born of their sorvice fear of tripping themselves on stairs with their spurs. They keep house in a pretty little place out in Mount Pleasant. They have had considerable difficulty' in keeping a servant, as a good many Mount Pleasant folks do. Their last servant wearied of tbe"lonesomene8s" one evening last week, packed up the things that belonged to her, and probably a few things that did not be long to her, in accordance with the rule in such cases, and departed, an nouncing that she was not to return. The young wife wept dismally after the servant's departure, and her hus band, sympathizing with his wife's red nose, endeavored to assuage her grief. "Let 'er go," said he. "I'll stay home from the office tomorrow-, and you can bundle off bright and early and get another one. Don't rush yourself to death over it, either. I can run this shack for one day, I guess." "But if I am away after the noon hour what will you do for your lunch, you poor old monkey thing?" she asked him, solicitously affectionate. "Never you mind me," he said. "I'll get along. You watch me." So, on the following morning, di rectly after breakfast, the young wife, with many forebodings as to the rack and ruin she would find, and not a bit of her work done when she re turned, set out for the down town dis trict to beg, borrow or steal a house servant. "It'll be a give away, all right," murmured her husband to himself, but I'll do it all the same." So he set to work. First, he washed the dishes. Soldiers of the regular army of the United States wash dishes with a practised skill and a thorough ness such as few women, with all due consideration, exhibit. He made a nice job of the dish washing and then took a pair of shears and cut a lot of jcalloped borders out of old newsjm papors for the china closet. Then he put the dishware away all neat and orderly. Then he started in at the kitcheu. He polished the stove first, so that the kitchen cat raised her back at her own image in it. Then he got at the pans, pots, skillets and so on, and made them look like new. Theu he swept out the kitchen, after which he got down on his marrowbones and gave it the most business-like scrub bing it had ever had a military scrub bing. Thus the kitchen was all fixed. Then he went upstairs to their room and made the bed. A man who has made up his bunk in quarters in the United States army for any space of time doesn't need to get any points from the women folk, as to how that job should be done. Then he Bprinkled tea leaves around and swept the whole upstairs portion of the house, after which he dusted it thor oughly. Then he descended the stairs and began the policing of the dining room, sitting room and parlor. He changed the furniture all about, changed the location of some of the pictured advantageously, gave the piano a better position and cleaned and swabbed the whole outfit until it looked as if half a dozen ordinary servants had been policing it. Lunch hour had rolled around by this time, aud so he-went to the kit chen, neatly fried himself some bacon and eggs, aud made himself a cup of coffee on the gas stove, after which he cleaned up the dishes he had used and smoked a couple of pipes full of tobacco and reflected. He had ex pected his wife back by that time, but she didn't come. He began to think , of how she'd no doubt be worrying about the the dinner then, and so h decided to get the dinner himself. H put on his coat and went out to the market to buy the dinner. He picked out a fine, thick steak and the neces sary vegetables, and rather astonished the marketman with his workmanlike' manner of buying. Theretofore he had simply been the bill payer at tho market store. He had a fine dinner agoing by half after 3. He knew that his wife would not be gone later than 4 o'clock, so at a 3.45 he put the steak on to broil. Then he set. the table with a whole lot of neatness, not forgetting the buuch of flowers that he had bought at the market for the purpose of adorning the table. His wife walked in, weary, footsora and ravenous, at two minutes past 4 o'clock. She paused at the thresh hold and looked about her. The hall had been policed with great thorough ness and she could not understand. Then she walked into the parlor. Her face assumed a dazed expression. "Why, Jack," she said, "have you engaged a servant yourself?" "Nope," he replied. "Just been passing the time myself a bit, that's all." , When she saw the set dining room, the spotless and shining kitchen, with its glistening utensils, the broiling steak, and when she went upstairs and saw the miracle that had befin wrought there, too, she simply sat down in a rocking chair and stared at her husband. She was able to speak after a while, and then she inquired: "But where did you learn to do it all?" He grinned, and went to a little old trunk of his that was stowed away in the spare room. He dug into this for a while, then he brought out a parch- , ment paper. He took it over to his wife and handed it to her. It was an army discharge. The space after the word "character" was filled in with, the word "excellant. " There was an indorsement at the bottom of the dis charge signed by the colonel of the regiment, saying, "This man is a fine soldier, both in garrison and camp. "I had to take my turn as cook of my outfit, you know," he said after a while, "aud all of us have got to know how to police up and keep things clean." "But why did you never tell me you were a soldier? Don't you know I perfectly adore and idolize sol diers?" she asked him, aud he could only grin and look sheepish. A Foison Bottle Wanted. The Chemist and Druggist, we learn, bas actually offered a five-guinea prize for a good tell-tale poison bottle, and has received many valuable suggest tions in reply. Oue of them is thai the neck should be at right angles to the body of the bottle, instead 'of in a line with it. This idea also reaches us from auother quarter. Another, of a more fanciful kind, is that the user should be warned off by a death's head and cross-bones of the poison label. But the main thing is the apt peal toother senses than that of sight. The bottle must be able to signal "poison" in the darkness. One in-, genious person, as we showed the other day, proposed to appeal to the. sense of hearing by meaus of a sort of musical cork. The seuses of taste aud smell, of course, are out of the question. The sense of touch remains, and this or nothing can be our safe guard. This sense may be simulated by differences of form in the bottle or by differences of texture. One com petitor for the prize suggests strips of, sandpaper pasted on the sides. But while he is about it, why not have the roughness iu the texture of the bottle itself, and combine the two safeguards in a triangular bottle with "toothed" edges? If anything further is wanted, put the neck at right angles, as afore said. Any person who persisted in the abuse of the bottle in spite of these precautious ought to be brought under the habitual inebriates act. London News. Health in the Navy. Good order and discipline, the clean liness of the ship nothing, not even the daintiest of summer cottages, is more clean than a well-ordered Ameri can warship were maintained at the camp throughout its entire occupancy by the battalion, and the fact that, al though exposed to a malarious climate in the torrid atmosphere of a tropical summer, at a spot located but a few score miles from where our poor fel lows of the army were succumbing by hundreds iu the fever-laden air, the entire loss of life in the marine batta lion was due to the casualties of battle not one maa died of disease shows what can be done by well-regulased and well-drilled organization in all de partments of a military body. There was no lack of medical or other neces sities; nothing essential to the effi ciency of the force as a fighting body, to its'health, to the protection of the men from adverse conditions of life in the field during the rainy season of the tropica, had been neglected or for gotten; and while it is true that the base of supply was close at hand and the problem of transportation inland from the water's edge did not have ta be met, it is safe to hssume from the admirable order aud systBin displayed, thut any each didculties presented would have been overcome. Harper's