rT7' 1,1
A rfiif iiHT
W It 1 I f I:
a i m i is 'ii i v i v n i t i v m
. $1.00 a Year, in Advance..
" FOR GOD, FOR COUNTRY, AND FOR TRUTH
Single Copy, 5 Cents.
VOL. XIII.
PLYMOUTH, N.'C, FRIDAY. FEBRUARP27, 1903.
NO. 50.
A .1
r
7
66 ff
By ROBERT BARR.
THE house was chaos. One
lamp burned, a cheap made In
; Germany affair, "which gave
but sufficient light to show the
.'hopeless disorder of the room. The
furniture stood about at all impossible
angles; pictures, instead of being neat-
Iy arranged upon the "walls, rested
s on theTQoor, leaning their faces against
the wainscot, as things in grief; books,
loosely tied with coarse string, were
flung here, a bundle Of fireirons hud
dled there. Chaos indescribable.
Hut Stuart Brazier was a methodical,
philosophic soul, the very; type of the
satisfied ' and . satisfactory' suburban
dweller. lie had glanced at the dis
heartening scramble of . furniture and
ornaments without the least little dis
. couragement. To-morrow, not to-night,
he would begin" to set things to rights.
The June night closed In, and Stuart
Brazier sat in his comfortable chair,
smoking and turning' matters over In
- his mind. lie "was glad to be at length
In the first detached house he had ever
possessed;' he thought of lts.spaclous
lawns, spacious for a London suburb,
and of the grounds well bushed in from
spying neighbors. He was glad, too,
that he had sent his wife and little girl
to Margate, where, in bracing air, they
( "would know nothing of the discom
forts of a moving day. The dust and
the turmoil of the morning, the heavy
boots trampling on uncarpeted stairs,
the sight, of men, straining In their
determination not to Injure heavy fur
niture,, the. sounds of hammers and
falling things, the whole picture of
turning out of one house and going
Into another had got upon his nerves
just a little, and now that he sat at
rest he felt disinclined to stir himself.
But "write to Margate , he must. His
"wife would look to receive a letter
from him the first thing in the morn
ing, telling, her all about it; assuring
her that no' precious family god had
been brokent and that her jewelry box
was quite safe.. After their little girl,
the chief care of the Braziers was that
tmall tin box which contained the
wife's valuables. Its contents were
richer than are usually found in a
suburban villa, for both Stuart Brazier
and his wife were connected with peo
ple who could well afford to remember
in a pleasant , and ' substantial way
birthdays, and did remember them.
, At length Stuart Brazier stirred him
self, lie refilled and lighted his huge,
homely pipe, gathered a miscellaneous
collection of bric-a-brac off the round
table, and sat down to write. He
wrote cheerfully, telling all about the
small events that make up r. moving,
and, strangely enough, had .just fin
ished these words: "Like a tinker, I
am happy in my squalor; all I yearn
lor is company, and I wonder who will
'first foot our new house?" when his
ear caught the sound 0 footsteps com
ing boldly up the gravel path .which
led to the front door. Brazier listened,
and" then quickly glanced at his watch.
"Tory o'clock," he muttered to himself.
""Too late to be the last post. Now,
who the deuce is coming, and what
does he want? Ferhaps one of the
movers has left something behind."
As the crunching sounds grew
nearer. Brazier made out that there
must bo more than one person ap
proaching' his door. The windows of
the room in which he sat were wide
-open, allowing him to hear with great
distinctness. Outside, the night was
pitch dark; occasionally illuminated by
bent lightning, which blotted out moon
and stars, the whole world seeming to
pant in the clammy heat of threaten-'
Ing rain. Within a few yards of the
front door the visitors paused, and the
next instant Brazier heard the high
pitched voice of a woman say:
"I'm- sure there's robbers in; I feel it
In my bones."
"Be quiet, dear; do shut up," roughly
commanded the voice of a man.
"How can I be quiet, if burglars and
housebreakers are rumpling and tear
ing my " i
' '.'Oh. shut up. You'll be in hysterics
first thing, you know. You'd better
stay out of 'arm's way. Go back
there, to them bushes, and keep still."
"t wouldn't leave you for worlds; in
deed and indeed I wouldn't. I would
die of fright, I know I would."
"Well, then, keep your 'ead shut, and
let me and the constable do the talking
or anything else."
" Brazier grinned, and started for the
floor, taking the miserable light with
him. Before he had picked his way
through the furniture to the hall, the
front bell was rung violently. He
placed the lamp on the hall table, and,
flinging open the door, asked:
"Well, what's up?" ; '
"What's up, indeed! How have you
got into this house?" demanded some
one, he could not well see who.
"By promising to , pay rent, princi
pally," Brazier replied, good naturedly,
realizing that a mistake had been
made, a mistake that would turn out
all right for -him in the end. Peering
Into 'the darkness, he saw that the
party numbered three, a man, a woman
and a constable. The man had In his
hand a large Gladstone -bag, which,
before replying to Brazier's little wit
ticism, he proceeded to place upon the
grass. ,
"Well, by leavens, you're a cool cus
tomer, yu are.. What are you doing
in my 'ouse?" .. . ,.
; "I'm not in your house."
"It's a lie; you are!" exclaimed the
man, in vs' passion. "You tUbught to
'ave the. place air night for a quiet
search, I suppose,', but you're "'been
found out, you 'ave. .You're trapped,
you are.''
"Be calm, sir, and dou't talk non
sense, If you can help It," Brazier re
plied. "This Is my house; and.it is
filled with my furniture. I moved In
to-day." .
"I know jolly well you moved in. to
day, and I know jolly well you'll move
out to-night. Policeman, I give this
man in charge."
The policeman looked at Brazier, but
made no move..
"Constable," said Brazier, now thor
oughly amusetl, "there , is a ludicrous
mistake here somewhere. ; The irate
gentleman, perhaps, has taken a house
near by, and moved into it, as I have
Into this to-day. lie has made a mis
take in the number .of his house."
Turning tojhe stranger, he continued:
"If your good. lady and you will step
in and glance at the furniture, you
will find out that you are in the wrong.
I'm sorry there is not a better light
for you, but you will, perhaps, make
that do."' Without a word, the two
stepped into the 'hall. .
Turning to address a pleasant re
mark to the policeman, Brasier sudden
ly found himself sprawling on the
gravel path, and at the same instant
heard the door shut to with a bang.
The' policeman hastened forward to
assist the astonished man to his feet.
Before astonishment and anger al
lowed him to open his mouth, -Brazier
heard the voice of the woman sing out,
"Go away, you wicked housebreaker,
or the policeman will take you in
charge," and, next the front windows
were shut down In great haste.
"What possesses these two .people?
Surely they are out of their minds,"
Brazier at length said to the attentive
policeman. "That's my house; I have
valuables in there. I can't have stran
gers in possession, and unwatched. I
don't care who they are, or how mis
taken they may be. I must ask you
to g5t them out without delay."
"I have no right to break into a
house, sir," answered the constable.
"To speak plain, I don't know either
of you, so. I can't tell .whose house It
is. You may be right; or, you know,
sir, he may be right. How am I to
know which is which?"
"I had possession, 3011 saw that,"
hotly replied Brazier. "You saw me
installed In the house. Isn't that
enough for you?".
"Certainly not, sir. You had posses
sion, then I was on your side; they
have possession now, and I am on their
side that is, in a way. Blest If I
know what's up, though, between you
all. X would not have taken you out,
nor can I take them out.v
"You're partly responsible, you know.
If you had not been here with them, I
would not have given them any chance
to break in." ,
"They didn't break, in; you showed
them in. I wouldn't have let them
break in,' no fear. But you asked them
in as polite as a preacher, and you see
they've accepted."
"You allowed them to assault me,
and to evict me " '
"Me? How could I help what they
did? It was done in the twinklin' of
an eye. I didn't know the man was
going to give you his shoulder."
"You have seen him do an illegal
thing " . s
'.There's no use your talking to me.
You'd, better see the sergeant at the
station. Between you and ma, I think
this is a summons job: it will take you
a day . or two to get them out, even if
they don't belong here, if they sit
tight."
"Summons to get", heaven knows
who, out of my houss, just because
they have the daring Impudence to get
in in the way they did! They'll suffer
for this, if there is any law In the land.
They're impostors; the chances are
they're worse; they're thieves."
Out of the first floor window a head
was thrust, and a man's voice asked:
" 'Asn't he gone yet? Let 'im go,
policeman. We've no further use fer
Mm." .
"Are you people staying in?" asked
the policeman.
"Of course we are; it's our 'ouse, and
I suppose we 'ave a right to stay 'ere
for the night, ain't we?"
"What am I to do, constable?" asked
Brazier, for the first time realizing that
the matter of getting two stubborn
people out of his house was likely to be
a much more tedious business than get
ting them in. "What do you advise?"
"Now that your temper has left you,
and you ask advice. I'll give It. To
tell1 the truth, I don't like the looks
of things here, and so I'll stay and
keep a sharp watch on what goes on.
You cut off as fast as you can to the
station, and explain everything to thd
sergeant in charge. Tell him P. C.
Foster sent you. You know the sta
tion?" f No, I don't."
"Well, outside your gate, turn to the
left and keep straight oh to the end of
the street ;you'll find it a goodish step,
you will, so yo.u may as well make
haste. I'll watch these gentry, I will."
Stuart Brazier, hatless and slipper
bn'fee, darted down the gravel walk,
and at his best pace made off in the
direction Indicated .to him by the po
liceman. He thought of his' wife's
Jewels, and could hot keep Jrom grin
ning ruefully 'at his words regarding
the "first foot.;; Here was a pleasing
first foot Indeed. How his wife, would
laugh, and enjoy the plight providing
always that nothing happened to her
treasures. But he solaced hhnself the
couple must be crazy, and crazy peo
ple do not steal, however much they
may delight in destroying.''
He had gone but a few hundred
yards before good fortune came to him.
At the corner of a street. ho came with
in an ace of running full tilt 'against
two mounted policemen, who, having
met," were passing the time of night
pvit.h each other. All breathless, Stuart
Brazier explained matters to them.
When they -had heard, they quickly
swung off, their horses. One constable
led the animals to a lamppost, to which
he secured them; the other closely
questioned Brazier. -
"What did 3-ou say the constable'?
name is?"
"Foster."
"Yes. and did Foster tell you this
was the way to. the station?"
"Yes, he said, 'Turn to the left when
you get out of your gate.' I turned to
the left."
"I'm afraid, in your anxiety, you
have mistaken what he sald. You
should have turned to your right."
"He said 'left,' I'm sure." '
"It does not matter, "now that yon
iiave met us. Come 'on and we'll see
what's to do. Please make no noise;
you can't tell what's up or who's
about.". '
All three scaled the" palings at the
corner of Brazier's garden, and, keep
ing in the shadow of the bushes, as
noiselessly and as quickly as ferrets
they made their-way to a spot that
commanded a view of the hall door. .
"I don't see Foster," one whispered.
"He may be at the back of the
house," the other answered, "or he
may not bo here at all."
"You're right,", replied the first.
"You slip up under the shadow and
take your stand against .the front
door." Turning to Brazier, he whis
pered, "Now you stick by me and
don't funk, you-know. Is the back
door locked?"
"It was when I left the house."
"All right; be as silent as a ghost
now,t and .when I shove In the door
with my shoulder, you float this light
Jn ahead of me. We'll rush right in
pell-mell. I may as well tell you there
ia no policeman named Foster in this
district. But I know who Foster is, I
think; he's Jim Cumming, the'eunning
est but no talk now; come on, and be
steady."
The door went in with a crash to
the might of the constable's great
shoulders, and two seconds later
Brazier stood in his dining-room. Be
fore him, in 'various attitudes of sur
prise and vicious terror, were three
men dressed in ordinary clothes. The
bogus policeman grasped a chair by
the back, and swung it to strike, but
the real constable's voice rang out:
"Jim, don't do that. You should
know better. It will go hard enough
with you as matters stand. Don't
make a fool of yourself. Don't earn
more time."
The ruffian put down the chair with
out a word and seated himself upon
it. .
"You have me fair and- square, you
have, and no mistake. Who's with
you?"
"Ronald; he's at the front doOr."
Turning to Brazier, the policeman
said, "Let my chum in, please."
"You have to be doing something al
ways, Jim. This is a new wheeze
you've struck."
"Yes, and a good one, only I'm out of
luck of late. Think of the bareheaded
fool running against you two! I count
ed on him looking for the station for
a bit yet."
The constable ran his eye over the
other two, he that so lately was a
woman and the other who had the
Gladstone bag.
"These are new friends?" queried
the policeman.
"Yes, and good 'uns, too; they played
the game well. Claude here made a
fetching gal but there, Where's, the
use of talking now it's all over. You
haven't such a thing as a cup of tea
or a little to eat in the house?" Brazier
had to admit that he hadn't.
"No apology, mister," said Jim. "I
know you've Just moved in. Luck is
down on us with both feet to-night."
"Where's your togs?" asked the po
liceman. ,
"You'irfind my policeman's uniform
in the front room. Claude, you left
your petticoats upstairs, didn't you?"
An hour later Stuart Brazier, back
from the police station, picked up the
thread of his letter, and told of his
company and the "first foot." The
King. , -
The Little To Goinc
The latest discovery of medical
science finds expression in the asser
tion of an eminent authority that the
small' toe of the human foot will be
crowded out of existence by the end
of the. present century. Such is the
view 'of chiropodists generally, and of
physicians who have given the matter
more than passing consideration, says
the Philadelphia Press.
Just as, -according to Darwin, the
tail was crowded out of the human
bony skeleton many ages back because
it had no useful functions to perform;
just as the vemiform appendix, the
only apparent function of which is to
necessitate dangerous and expensive
operations, will eventually find no
place in human anatom', so, according
to present indications, the little toe
must ultimately disappear altogether.
Whether or not the big toe is all that
is needed in walking and running is a
question which has not yet been satis
factorily answered, but the fact re
mains that . athletic instructors and
coaches have universally striven to, de
velop the big toe at the expense of the
others in the training of fast runners
and football players, and to that end
the shoes have been made so narrow
that any possibility of using the little
toe has been precluded.
Between the modern method of walk
ing and the wearing of tight-fitting
shoes, the little toe is doomed to an
early end.
A Ferocious Animal.
The usually veracious Philadelphia
record recently" printed an account of
a thrilling combat between a muskrat
and a man. It occurred in Minersville,
Pa., which is near rottsville. -William
Lewis was putting on hi3 skates when
a large, lean muskrat came out of his
hole and attacked him. Time and
again the man beat the monster off
with his skates, and each time the
monster returned. Finally Lewis suc
ceeded in killing him, but not until he
had been bitten severely. Naturally
the report ends with the remark that
"it was the largest species of muskrat
ever seen in these parts." '
Wall Street Safe.
'A' trio consisting of father, mother
and precocious young daughter were
craning their necks to see the top of
the skyscrapers in Wall and Broad
street, when the father exclaimed: .
"What r. calamity would be wit
nessed if an earthquake visited the
vicinity!"
The precocious child quickly quieted
the parent's fears by remarking:
"Wall Street is safe in such an event,
as there isn't room for tnoso buildings
to fall anywhere." New York Times.
A QUARTER FOR KENRY. ,
Mrs. Henrietta whispers in her husband'
henpecked ear:
"Here's a quarter for you, Henry; it will
be a-plenty, dear,"
When poor Henry tries to argue: "Fifty
cents, my dear, to-day."
Henrietta poirts her finger: "Henry, not .
a word, jt say!".
And the people' say: "He's awful! All
he thinks of in this life
Is his money money money! How I'd
hate to be his woe!"
" . Indianapolis Sun ,'
ay
Jesrs
Maud "Who was that friend I saw1
you with last night?" Ellen "He's
not a friend; I am engaged to him."
Tit-Bits.
"Oh, I'm sure she isn't as old as she
looks." "Perhaps not, but 'm sure
she's older than she thinks she looks."
Philadelphia Press.
She "Why, I wouldn't marry you If
you were the last man on earth." He
"Quite so. "l could get-a handsime
wife then." Philadelphia Fress.
"Who is that aristocratic person over
there?" "That! Why, ghat's the lucky
fellow who invented the wbrmless
chestnut." Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Ere long the school boy will rjkiiDi "'
His lessons to review.
For every year he has to learn
Geography anew.
Washington Star.
Hlller "What do you think of a man
who will marry a,, girl for the sake of
her money?" Kent "I think he wants
the money pretty badly." Boston
Transcript.
Tenant "I say, the cellar of my
house is half fall of water." Landlord
"Is that so?' Well, it's all right.
You're water tax won't be raised."
Boston Transcript.
"Yes, he has an incurable heart
trouble. He's fallen in love." "Oh.
that's not incurable." "Not ordinarily,
but I'm afraid his age is against him.
He's over sixty." Philadelphia Press.
"Man wants but little here below"
So runs the good refrain.
- Alas! That little always is
What's hardest to obtain.
New York Herald
"Do you keep late hours, young1
man?" asked the blue-nosed woman of
the clerk in the music store. "We've
got 'The Clock in the Steeple Strikes
One,' ma'am, if that's what you want?"
Yonkers Statesman.
"Let it be understood," said Miss
Passay, "that I want a genuine like
ness; a natural reproduction of my fea
tures that- " "In that case, ma'am,'
replied the photographer, "I must ast
you to pay in advance" Philadelphia
Press.
"Please, ma'a,ra won't you give m
ten cents to buy a loaf o' bread?"
"Why, bread Is only five cents a loaf.'
"Yes, ma'am. But I alius has to eat
a nickel's worth o' choe'late drops to
git up a appetite." Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
"I tell you," asserted the strong
minded woman, "women tan do men's
work as well as men do it." "That
may be so," said the philosophical man.
"and it only proves men's mental su
periority. He never tries to do wom
an's work as well as woman , can."
Brooklyn Life. '
"Wha-a-t's the matter, John?" gasped
Mrs. Torque; "don't you like the new
dishes I've cooked?" "Where did you
get the recipe?" "Out of the cookbook,
of course." Why?" "Don't you thlnlc
that you happened to get the cookbook
mixed with some dialect story? thl
dish tastes like it." Baltimore Herald.
Special Courses For Boys.
"In planning special courses of world1
suitable for our-public schools some
account ought to be taken of the boy's
Interest in the home," said one of al:
committee on moderninzlng the curri
culum. "The girls are taught how to
make a room look cozy and homelike;
why should not the boy know how to
do his-share In the work of keeping it
so? On the boy ought to fall the re
sponsibility of attending to the odd
little jobs for which his sisters are
never supposed to have any liking or'
training. Among these jobs may be
mentioned the keeping in repair of
doorknobs, locks and hinges; the put
ting up of shelves, hooks and fixtures;
the oiling, staining and waking of the
floors. He can usurp the function of
the glazier, the painter, the carpenter
and the locksmith." New York Times.