Newspapers / The Roanoke Beacon and … / Aug. 20, 1926, edition 1 / Page 2
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[ ,A NEVJVor^'Boxing VAW : -r.ootV>i3rrs TWtTiNi' UN“x j 'v3)[_ul£Vc »n GH V • \^G j MA^'GTD'^ I VfcXjNS A Jazz band is a group of citizens who are paid tor playing static. “Dick was almost drowned last night." ‘‘Not How come?" "The pillow slipped, the bed spread, and he fell into the spring." The boss: “Robert, I hope you try to save half of what you earn." Office boy: “1 don't get that much, sir." During the World \\ ar one of the great steamships that was used as a transport for soldiers was on her way across when a torpedo boat was sighted. In anticipation of the danger they were in all on board were lined up on deck. There was a deathly hush for an instant, when suddenly from down the line a negro's voice rang out:“Is dar ennybody heah dat wants to buy a gold watch and chain?’ A Tramp knocked at the hack door of an oldfashioned house, he said in a whining voice: “Please kind lady. I'm a sick man. The docter gave me this medicine, but 1 must have something to take with it.’’ The woman, who was kind hearted, said: “Do you want a spoon and a glass of water? “well, mum," answered the tramp, “| wouldn’t trouble you, but it says on the bottle, ‘To be taken after meals.’ Have you a meal handy?" Dum—Why do they always call a sailboat she? Bell—Because the rigging costs so much. Dum—No; because they make a better showing in the wind. Dean—Where are your parents? Girl—1 have none. Dean—Then where are your guard ians? Girl —I have none. Dean—Then where are your sup poi ters1 Girl—Sir! You are forgetting yourself. A bishop noticed a small boy playing in the gutter. “What are you doing, my iittle man?” he asked. “Making a kerfeedral," replied the boy. ‘‘A cathedral! But where’s the bishop?" “Oh, 1 ain't got enough mud to make a bishop." An elderly spinster, well known as a lecturer, was awakened one night by the sound of creaking floor-boards. She saw the outline of a burglar. Instead of screaming in sheer fright, she calmly extracted a revolver from beneath her pillow, switched on the electric light, and addressed the miscreant. "Instead of sending you to prison I am going to give you a chance. And to help you to take it 1 will outline for you my lecture or. "Criminal or Citizen? t low the law-breaker may win back his self respect. About an hour later there came a frantic ring on the telephone in the local police-station, and an an guished voice said: "There's a burglar in Miss Jones’ bedroom at. bend the police at once,'' “Right!" came the reply. "That is Miss Jones speaking, I suppose?" "No." came the melancholy an swer; "this is the burglar." Judge: "Ten days, or ten dol lars. Take your choice.' Prisoner: "i'll take the money, honor." Our $ilent Salesman Advertising for this column will be accepted at one cent per word per issue. The first line will always appear in heavy black type as shown below. No ad of less than twenty-five words or its equivalent. PROTECT YOUR EYES with our frosted electric shades Ideal for hall, bedroom, library or living room. Fiower pots in any size. Landings’ Va riaty Store. QUICK. COURTEOUS SER vice is the secret of our ever increasing patronage. If you are not already among our cus tomers we would be glad to have you make us a visit. E. G. Arps, druggist. OUR MENU OFFERS MOST appetizing dishes to people of all taste, and our service is de signed to please everybody. Come here once and you will he a regular visitor. Roanoke Coffee Shoppe. AS AN tNDEN TO THE QUA litv of service we iend«r we ask you to notice how busy our barbers are kept, and how sat isfied our customers always are. Give us one trial and you wiil become a regular customer here. Swain and Sexton. A DANDY 2NUESTMENT FOR Men and You hs is regular $16 50 value Monairsuits which have been reduced to $11.75. Be sure to also investigate our Shoe bargains. Davis & Livar man. WHEH YOU THiMK OF GET ing up a meal remember that we are carrying a tine line of western meats in our own cold storage plant, and that we de liver in your kitchen. Ply mouth Market & Grocery Co. ANTiCSPATSNG THE WANTS of the ladies of this section our buyer is now in the northern markets selecting fall and win ter wearing apparel. Look for our future announcements. Normans. NO MATTER WHAT YOUR humor is when you come in our store, you wlli certainly leave feeling fine. O’Henry Drug Store. WE 00 ALL THAT ANY GAR age can do to please our pa trons and we guarantee our service to satisfy. Give us a trial and be convinced. Ply mouth Garage & Motor Co., Inc WHEN YOU WANT FRESH bread, rolls, cakes and pies you know that we bake every day and that our products are pure and fresh- Hassel! Bros. SINGERSEWING machines th# housewife’s choice. Terms to suit \our salarv. See me for j particulars. W. E. Weede, Ply mouth. INSTALL AWNINGS AND EM joy the remainder of the hot months and at the same time he ready for next summer. See B. G. Campbell, !OUR LINE OF FALL MER . chandise is arriving daily. If you need any apparel for any ! member of the family you will | be sure to be satisfied when ; you come here Gaboon Quality you SHOW GOOD JUQG rnent when you keep your clothes in good condition Let us help you by keeping them I cleaned and pressed. Jack’s j Pressing Shop. OUR STORE SHALL REMAIN open during the time our buy [ er bin the north making selec tions for fall and winter milli f nery. Reene’e Millinery Shop. WEtSSiTE YOU TO MAKE our store a visit when vou want anything ifi the staple and fan cy grocery line. Our prices are j as low as any and we make de liveries. C. VV. Blount, Jr. &0o. BRIDGE PARTY. BIRTHDAV party or in fact for any social occasion where neat invitations are needed, see our styles andi prices, Roanoke Reaeon. j About your 'Things You Should Know Tlest is in no way related to lazi ! ness. One cannot be said to rest ur.*ess weary. Host is the antidote for intensive action; it is our best reconstructive, and, like most val uables, should be earned to be en joyed. There is no equal for rest in the restoration of tired nerves or fag ging energies. Medicines are poor substitutes for rest, if indeed they are substitutes at all. Often have I recalled the prescription of the meek and lowly Nazarene, when he beheld the tempest rag-i-,g and said, “Peace; be still.” When the nerves are taxed to the uttermost, sleep impossible, the mind, urged beyond its capability, totters on its throne, then rest—rest—unless rest is secured disaster is immin* cnt. The well-ordered man will not permit anything to disturb his rest hour. In these hurry-skurry days we seem to forget that rest is an es sential to human life and happi ! ness. We forget that a worn-out j mind is even worse than a worn i out body, as we swing in our swivel-chairs and order a “bromo” for the headache. What rebels we I arc, turning night into day and day into default! We ignore the ' law of rest and wonder why we do j not feel well. ,So«ie very ignorant, unthinking people seek stimulants when tired. This puts off the crisis for a time, but not for long. No break-down comes without warning in time. We should heed the call of rest, even though it is only a whisper. To j evade it is to hear at some criticaL time the shout of outraged Nature “Pool, take thy penalty ^)fully earned!” NOTICE OF ENTRY North Carolina: Washington County To Mrs. A. L. Brinkley, Entry Taker of Washington County: The under signed .1. J. Johnston of Washington County. Stale of North Carolina, en ters a ad lays claim to the following described piece or parcel of land in bees Mills Townsuip, Washington County, siate of North Carolina, the same being vacant and unappropriat ed land, and subject :o entry, and de scribed as follows: Beginning in the line of J. E. Blount at a forked juniper and running North 1000 yards, thence west 1000 yards, theuce south 1000 yards, tnence east 1000 yards the place of beginning. The nearest water course be.ng Albemarle Sound. The said lands contains by estimation 100 acres more or less. This 4th day August, 192G. J. J. Johnston, Enterer. MRS. A. L. BRINKLEY, Entry Taker of Wash ingt. n County. Passenger Schedules Effective May 2, 1926 PLYMOUTH, N. C. DAILY Lv. 2:30 p. m.—Raleigh. New Bern Goldsboro, Beaufort, and in termediate points. Parlor car to New Bern. Lv. 12:43 a.m.—Raleigh, New Bern Goldsboro, Beaufort, Char lotte, Fayetteville and inter mediate points. Sleeping car Raleigh to New Bern, Lv. 12:30 p, m.— Norfolk and in termediate points. Parlor cap Lv. 4;00 a. m.—Norfolk and inter mediate points. Sleeping car. For tickets, Pullman reservations and other information address or apply to VV. C. MILLER, Ticket Agent, Plymouth, N. C. LADIES, who can do plain sewing: at home and want profit able spare time work, write (en close stamp) to Homa'd Dress Co., Amsterdam, N. Y.3* THE WORLD IsTu L L 0 F. substitutes for everything but satisfaction. Our impioved job printing depart.merit SATISFIES. Roanoke Bea con WANTED—A chance to snow everyone the necessity of hav ing g 'od job printing Give us a trial? FOR SALE CHEAP; one Diano in excellent condition. 0. H. Lyon. e NEW LIFE PILLS The Pills That Do Cute* ON THE GASOLINE CIRCUIT By A B. CHAPIN 5% -1 >- —I ■ <. S '$'( Go?* 11M'Lucky stiff ! \v /U '^/‘v S V/lSW I WAS ROUCWlf/G- IT Ta \\I4 AU'CAMPl^S- OWT . / ill -P ^y'A.iy AT ajiCHtS — f y ‘ -C ^ KJ1 fi CoCa ! ThI' LUCKY Stiff! v/isa i was Cidims- ow th ' TL-l/sh ail" purriwff’ ur> At swell -hotel's — f ^ iW/Aelr St-’WS&s Jor Economical Transportation i iMm New Low Prices 1-TonTruck^ reduced to ^ToisTrucSt reduced to (Chassis only) fo.b.Jlint.Mickigan Chevrolet trucks have won worldwide accept ance on the basis of low first cost, low operating cost and slow depreciation. This spectacularly grow ing popularity has made necessary a greatly in creased production — the economies of which are now being passed on to Chevrolet truck buyers in the form of a drastic price reduction. Woodley Chevrolet Comp’y PLYMOUTH COLUMBIA Worlds lowest Priced Geanshift Trucks POINTED PINE PARAGRAPHS by O. H. L. Wernicke President Pine Institute of America, Inc. When a merchant sees the pillar of smoke from a forest fire in his cpunty, he should say, “There goes tome of my trade into the clouds, ft means losing business now, anpl for fifteen years to come, that I might have had. The man who set that fire will have poorer grass for his live-stock, hence poorer stock, and therefore less money to buy with. The owner of that land will have fewer trees and slower-grow ing trees, and therefore less money to buy with. Yes, there goes some ©f my trade." -*>•' FARM LOANS WE ARE PREPARED TO MAKE LOANS TO FARMERS OF WASHINGTON COUNTY. UN DER THE FEDERAL FARM LOAN ACT. FOR THE PURPOSE OF DEUELOPING PROPERTY C R PURCHASE OF FARM LANDS IN PERIODS OF FIUE TO THIRTY-THREE YEARS. FOR PARTICULARS APPLY TO H. J. FURBEE WENONA. N. C. WHEN YOU SELL YOUR CROP THINK OF YOUR SUBSCRIPTION!
The Roanoke Beacon and Washington County News (Plymouth, N.C.)
Standardized title groups preceding, succeeding, and alternate titles together.
Aug. 20, 1926, edition 1
2
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