TRY THE
VATCI1
Can Yon Hear?
PLm mtck to Mr lh draw
ewa. You kould bear lick at'
' M lacha. Dooe a rinsina ta iw
era pravant your propel b serin? .
LEONARD EAR OIL
I laliaaw bock Head Noiwa aad Ua-
ass. Just rata M baoa
-T 1 assert in asaenla.
Faa Sala Evanwhera.
' Jnraraarmt' deacWprve folder,
. eanl upon rwnic.
A. O. LEONARD, lac
70 Btft An.
New Vara
:.:UUi;i: :i:..:lr
HAKi BALSAM
MraaOaDanawnHatonaitaa
. " 3aur ta Gray 1 F" Hafcl
j sue. ai oeiir"Ps.
feaaaa. ata.. euv ail pala, ensures aoaif ort to lha
visas, BlsaaxCae laai WaTaa.ratoaaraa.aVT.
Obliging
"What do yon do when one of your
oil companies peter- out?"
. . "Oh. We keep swapping the custom
ers' shares In new companies until they
get tired of paying postage."
THAT GdUGH IS QUE
CAUSE FOR urn
.MtlalaMMa.
Get Rid of It by Taking Cheney's
Before It Turns Into Some-
thing
Worse
Sow that hacking- cough worry you
iMoauM it bangs on soT Really It ia a
.causa for worry, for If you don't gat
rid of It you may find yourself tha vic
tim of a far mora aerloua malady.
Thua It would ba worsa than fool
tin to let it go on, getting woraa and
woraa, arlthout taking tha aaaleat and
quickest method f putUng an, and to
tha trouble and ao aava youraelt from
what might turn out to ba a vary aerl
oua complication.
Suppoaa you go to tha drug atora
and get a- bottle of Cheney's Expec
torant and begin taking a ttaspoonful
' every two hours. Keep It up and you'll
find that by tomorrow the cough; -will
have almost entirely disappeared and
in a few daya will be completely gone,
t Tha time to get tha best of a cough
la light at tha beginning when you
first notice it. Each day you neglect
It only makea it more difficult to pry
loose Its hold on you. The', sooner you
begin treatment the - aooner you will
get over the trouble. Begin now.
Bold by all drugglata and In smaller
towna by general merchanta in lOo and
tOo bottles. Advertisement.
Anxious '
Sambo Look here. Yuh ain't even
payln' me Interest on dat five dollahs
yuh owes me.
Rastus Ah knows It, man. But Ah
am worryln tout It . '
DEMAND BAYEtT ASPIRIN
Take Tablets Without Fear If You
See the Safety "Bayer Crqsa."
Warning! Unless yon see the name
"Bayer" on package or on tablets yon
are not getting the genuine Bayer
Aspirin proved safe by millions and
prescribed by physicians for 23 yean.
Say "Bayer" when yon buy Aspirin.
Ipaltatlona may prove dangerous. Adv.
Clay Pipes and Cancer
The old short clay pipe Is disappear
ing and cancer of the lips has greatly
decreased In Great Britain, according
- to a famous surgeon.
One application of Roman Sye Balaam
will pro how good It la for aero era. Coata
air tl eente. Ill Pearl Bt N. T. Adv.
Unfair
' It Is unfair that a dumb creature ilka
a cat should have nine lives, while an
-intelligent pedestrian has only one.
IP"
L W a -SaaU
ll L:ix-a:js
',zi vzzr
La...s ..M.aE
' i k
in a:, j 7: ti
-1
cc::t
DO v'. "
M
i ' I"
" a I
Three Heri and a Haid
By P. C. WODEHOUSE
Copyright by George k. Dora Co.
CHAPTER XV Continued.
16
He swayed gracefully, conveying a
suggestion of departure without mov
ing his feet The action was enough
for Sam. Dignity gave an expiring
gurgle, and passed away, regretted by
alt
"Don't go!" he cried.
,'" The Idea of being alone In this In
fernal lane, without human support.
overpowered him. Moreover, Webster
had personality. Be exuded It Al-
ready Sam had begun to cling to him
In spirit and rely on his support
"Don't gol"
"Certainly not If you do not wish
it sir." a ' . )
v Webster coughed gently, to show
bis appreciation of the delicate nature
of the conversation. He was con
sumed with curiosity, and his threat'
ened departure had been but a pre
tense. A team of horses could not
have moved WebBter at that moment
"Might I ask, then what . . .?"
"ThereV been a misunderstanding,?
said Sam. "At least, there was, but
now there isn't If you- see what I
mean,"
I fear I bave not Quite grasped
your meaning, sir."
"Well, I I played a sort or you
might almost call It a sort of trick on
Miss Bennett With the best motives,
f course P
. "Of course, sir I
"And she's found out I don't know
how she's found out but she has. So
there you are!"
"Of what nature would the trick be,
sir? A species of ruse, slr-some kind
or innocent deceptions
"WelL It was like this."
It was a complicated story to tell,
and Sam, a prey to conflicting emo
tions, told It badly ; but such was the
almost superhuman Intelligence of
Webster, that be succeeded In grasp
ing he salient points. Indeed, he said
that It reminded, blm of something of
much the same kind In the Nosegay
Novelette, "All for Her," where the
hero, anxious to win the esteem of the
lady of his heart, bad bribed a tramp
to simulate an attack npon her in
lonely road.
"The Drinclole's the same." , said
Webster. '
"Well what did he do when she
found outr
"She did not find out, sir. All ended
happily, -and never had the wedding
bells In the old village church rung out
a blither peal than they did at the sub
sequent union."
Sam was thoughtful.
"Bribed a tramp to attack her, did
her
"Tea. sir. She bad never thought
much of blm till that moment sir.
Very cold and haughty she had been,
his social status being considerably in
ferlor to her own. But. when she
cried for help, and he dashed out from
behind a hedge, well, It made all the
difference."
"I wonder where I could get a good
tramp' said Sam, meditatively,
Webster shook his head.
"I really would hardly recommend
such a procedure, sir."
"No, It would be difficult to make a
tramp understand what you wanted.
Sam brightened.
"I've got It I Too pretend to attack
her, and I'U ,
"I couldn't sir I I couldn't really! I
should jeopardize my situation."
"Oh, cornel Be a man I"
"No. sir. I fear not. There's a dif
ference between handing In your res
ignation I was compelled to do that
only recently, owing to a few words I
had with the guv nor, though subse
quently prevailed upon to withdraw it
I say there's a difference between
handing In your resignation and being
given the sack, and that's what would
happen without a character, what's
more, and lucky if It didn't mean a
orison cell. No, sir; I could not con
.template such a thing."
"Then I don't see that there's any
thing to be done," said Sam morosely,
. "Oh, I shouldn't say that, sir," said
Webster, encouragingly. "It's simply
a matter of finding the way. The
nroblem confronting us you, I should
say . .
"Us," said Sam. "Most decidedly
us."
"Thank you very much, sir. I would
not have presumed, but If you say so
The nroblem confronting us, aa I en
visage it resolves Itself into this. Tou
have offended onr Miss B. and she has
expressed a disinclination ever to see
you again. How, then, Is it possible,
In spite of her attitude, te recapture
her esteem r
'Exactly,'? said Sam;
"There are several methods which
occur to one . . ,"
"They don't occur to me!"
"WelV for example, you might res-
cue her from a burning building as In
True as Steel
"Set fire to the house, eh?" said
Sam, reflectively. "Yes, there might
be something in that
"I would hardly advise such a
thing," said Webster, a little hastily
flattered at the readiness with which
his disciple was taking his advice, yet
acutely alive to the fact that he slept
at the top of the house himself.
"A little drastic, if I may say so. It
mlirht be better to save her from
drowning, as In The Earl'a Secret.
"Ah, but where could she drown?"
"Welt there is a lake in the
grounds . .. ." ' - .
"Excellent I", said Sam, "Terrific I I
knew I could rely on you. Say no
morel The whole thing's settled. Ton
take her ont rowing on the lake, and
upset the boat. I plunge In . a . 1
suppose you can swim?" , , ;
No, sir." -
"Oh I Well, never mind. Touu
manage somehow, I expect. Cling to
the upturned boat or something, i
shouldn't wonder. There's always a
way. Yes, that's the plan. When Is
tlie earliest you could arrange this?"
"I fear such a course must be con
sidered out of the question, sir. It
really wouldn't do."
"I can't see a flaw In It." . ;
"Well, In the first place, It would
certainly Jeopardize my situation. . . .
"Oh, hang your situation ! You talk
as if you were prime minister fir
something. You can easily get an
other situation. A valuable man like
you," said' Sam, Ingratiatingly.
"No, sir," said Webster firmly.
From boyhood up I've always had a
regular horror of the water. I can t
so much as go paddling without an
uneasy feeling." . i
The Image of Webster paddling was
arresting enough to occupy Sams
thoughts for a moment. It was an in
spiring picture; and for an Instant up
lifted his spirits. Then they feU
again.
"Well, I don't see what there Is to
be done,", he said, gloomily. . "It's no
good making suggestions, if you have
some frivolous objection to all of
them." x ,
"My idea," said Webster, "would be
something which did. not involve my
own personal and active co-operation.
sir. If It; Is all the same to you, I should
prefer to limit my assistance to advice.
I am anxious to help, but I am a man
of regular habits, which I do not wish
to disturb. Did you ever read 'Foot
paths of Fate,' In the Nosegay series,
Sir? I've only just remembered It and
It contains the most helpful suggestion
of the lot. There had been a misun
derstanding between the heroine and
the hero their names have slipped my
mind, though I fancy hla was Cyril
and she had told him to hop It . i
"To what?"
"To leave her for ever. sir. And
what do you think he did?"
"How the deuce do I know?"
"He kidnaped her little brother, sir,
to whom she was devoted, kept him
hidden for a bit, and then returned
him, and In her gratitude all was for
gotten and forgiven, and never
"I know. Never had the bells of the
old village church
"Kung out a blither peal. Exactly,
sir. Well there If you will allow me
to say so, you are, sir! Yon need seek
no further for a plan of action."
"Miss Bennett hasn't got a . little
brother."
"No, sir. But she has a dog, and Is
greatly attached to It'
Sam stared. From the expression on
his face It was evident that Webster
Imagined himself to have made a sug
gestion of exceptional Intelligence. , It
struck Sam as the silliest he had ever
heard,
"You mean I ought to steal her dog?"
"Precisely, sir."
"But,, good heavens! Have yotf seen
that dog?"
"The one to which I allude Is- a
small brown animal with a" fluffy tall."
"Yes, and a bark like a steam siren,
and, In addition to that, about eignty-
Ave teeth, all sharper than razors. I
ojDuldn't get within ten feet of that dog
without Its lifting the roof off, and,
If I did, It would chew me Into small
pieces."
"I had anticipated that difficulty, sir.
In 'FootDaths of Fate there was a
nurse who assisted the hero by drug
ging the child."
-"By Jove!" said Sam, impressed.
"He rewarded her," said Webster, .al
lowing hla gaze to stray nonchalantly
over the country-side, "liberally, very
liberally."
"If you mean, that you expect me to
reward yon if you drug the dog,'
said
Sam, "don't worry. Let me bring this
thing off. and you can bave all I've got
and my cuff-links as, well. Come, now,
this Is really beginning to look like
something. Speak to me more of this
matter. Where do we go from here?"
"I beg your pardon, sir?"
"I mean, what's the next step In the
scheme? Oh, Lord I" Sam's face fell.
The light of hope died out of his eyes.
It:s all off! It cant be done! How
could possibly get Into the house? I
take It that tne little orute-sieeps in
the house?"
"That need constitute no obstacle,
sir: no obstacle at all. The animal
sleeps In a basket in the hall.
Perhaps you are familiar with the In
terior of the house, sir?'
"I haven't been inside it since I was
at school. I'm Mr. Hlgnett's cousin.
you know.
"Indeed, sir? I. wasn't aware.. Mr.
HIgnett sprained his ankle this morn
ing, poor gentleman.'
"Has he?" said Sam, not particular
ly Interested. "I used to stsy with
him," he went on, "during the holidays
sometimes, but I've practically forgot
ten what the place la like Inside.
remember the hall vaguely, - Fireplace
at one side, one or two suits of armor
standing about a sort of window-ledge
near the front door
"Precisely, sir. It la close beside
that window ledge that the animal's
hnnket is situated.. If I administer a
slight soporific . . ."
"Yes, but you haven't explained yet
how I am to get Into the house in the
first place."
"Quite easily, sir. I can admit you
throueh the drawing room windows
while dinner is In progress."
- "Flnel" r
"You can then secrete yourse'f in the
cuDboard In the drawing room. Per-
hnna von recollect the cupboard to
which I refer, sir?" '
"No, I don't remember any cup
board. As a matter .of fact, when I
used to stay at the house the drawing
room was barred. . , . Mrs. HIgnett
wouldn't let us Jnslde It for fear we
should smash .her china. Is there a
cupboard?" ';; 'Z s,
' "Immediately behind the piano, sir.
A nice, roomy cupboard. I was
glancing Into It myself in a spirt of klle
curiosity only the Other day. It con
tains nothing except a few knick
knacks on an upper, shelf. You could
lock yourself In from the Interior, and
be quite comfortably seated on the floor
till the household retired to bed."
"When would that be?" ;, ""' ' :
"They retire quite early, sir, as a
rule, By half-past ten the coast is
generally clear. At that time I would
suggest that I came down and knocked
on the cupboard door to notify you that
all was well."
Sam was glowing with frank ap
proval. , ,
"You know, you're a master-mind I '
he said, enthusiastically.
"You're very kind, sir I"
."One of the lads, by Jove!" said Sam.
"And not the worst of them I I don't
want to flatter you. but there's a future
for you In crime, If you cared to go In
for It."
"I am glad that you appreciate my
poor efforts, sir. Then we will regard
the scheme as passed and approved?
"I should sav we would I Its a
bird I" ;
"Very good, sir."
'Tlli be round at about a quarter to
Bloht Will that he rltrht?" A
"Admirable, sir."
"And, I say, about that soporific.
Don't overdo It Don't go killing the
little beast."
"Oh, no, sir.
"Well," said Sam, "you can't say It's
not a temptation. And you know what
you Napoleons of the Underworld
are!"
CHAPTER XVI
Episode One.
If there Is one thing more than an
other which weighs upon the mind of a
story-teller as be chronicles the events
which be has set out to describe, it is
the thought that the reader may be
growing Impatient with him for stray
ing from the main channel of his tale
and devoting himself to what are alter
all minor developments. The story, for
instance, opened with Mrs. Horace
HIgnett the , world-famous writer on
Theosophy, going over to America to
herin a lecture tour: and no one
realizes more keenly than I do that I
lron-8ouled aa Thla Woman Was, Her
Fingers Trembled as She Wrote.
hsve left Mrs. HIgnett flat I have
thrust that great thinker into the hack
ground and concentrated my attention
on the affairs of one who is both her
mental and moral Inferior, Samuel
Marlowe. I seem at this point to see
the reader a great brute of a fellow
with beetling eyebrows and a jaw like
the ram of a battleship, the sort of a
fellow who Is full of determination and
will stand no nonsense rising to re
mark that he doesn't care what hap
pened to Samuel Marlowe and that
what he wants to know is, how Mrs.
HIgnett made out on her lecturing
TA hs m hla- In HlirTalnT 1)1(1
she have 'em tearing up the seats In
R.hMi.tdv Was she a riot in Chi-
ivut. a'.u ow - "
AflaTn anri cvdone In St. Louis? Thos4
re tha nointa on which he desires in-
formation, or give him hla money back.
I cannot supply t the Information.
And,, before yon condemn me, let me
hastily add that the fault la not mine
but that of Mrs. HIgnett herself. The
fact Is. she never went to Buffalo.
Schenectady saw nothing of her. She
did not get within a thousand miles of
Chicago nor did she penetrate to St
Louis. For the very morning after her
son Eustace sailed for England In the
liner Atlantic, she happened to read
In the paper one of those abridged
New York are In the habit of print
ing, and got a nasty shock when she
saw that among those whose society
Eustace would enjoy during the voy-
aae was Miss Wllhelmlna Bennett,
daughter of . J, Bufua Bennett of Ben
nett Mandelbaum and company. And
within five minutes of digesting this
Information, she was at her desk writ
ing out telegrams canceling all her
engagements. Iron-souled as this wom
an was, her fingers trembled as sne
wrote. , She had a vision of Eustace
and the daughter of J. Rufus Bennett
strolling together on moonlit decka.
leaning over rails damp with sea Bpray,
snd. In sort, generally starting the
whole trouble over again.
In the heio-ht of tha tourist aoaarai
if '
lit v
It Is not always possible for one who
wishes to leave America to spring on
to the next boat A long morning's
telephoning to the offices of the Cu
nard and the White Star brought Mrs.
HIgnett the depressing Information
that it would be a fyil week before
she could sail for England. That
meant that the Inflammable Eustace
would have over two weeka to con
duct an uninterrupted wooing, and
Mrs. Hlgnett's heart sank, till sudden
ly she remembered that so poor a sail
or as her son was not likely to bave
had leisure for any strolling on the
deck during theAoyage of the Atlantic.
Having realized this, she .became
calmer and went about her prepara
tions for departure with an easier
mind. The danger was still great, but
there was a good chance that she
might he in time to Intervene. Sho
wound up her affairs in New York and,
on the following Wednesday, boarded
the Nuronla bound for Southampton.
The Nuronla is one of the slowest
of the Cunard boats. It was built at
a time when delirious crowds used to
swoon on the dock if an ocean liner
broke the record by getting across In
nine days. It rolled over to Cher-
bourg, dallied at that picturesque port
for some hours, then sauntered across
the channel and strolled Into South
ampton water In the evening of the
dav on which Samuel Marlowe had
sat In the lane plotting with Webster,
the valet At almost the exact moment
when Sam, sliding through the win
dows of the drawing room, slid Into
the cupboard behind the piano, Mrs.
HIgnett was standing at the customs
barrier telling 'the officials that she
had nothing to declare. '
Mrs. HIgnett was a general who be
lieved in forced marches. A lesser
woman might bave taken the boat train
to London and proceeded to Wlndles
at her ease on the following afternoon.
Mrs. HIgnett was made of sterner stuff.
Having fortified herself with a late
dinner, she hired an automobile and
set out on the cross-country journey.
It was only when the car, a genuine
antique, had broken down three times
in the first ten miles, that It became
evident to her that It would be much
too late to go to Wlndles that night
and she directed the driver to take
her Instead to the "Blue Boar" In Wln-
dlehurst, where she arrived, tired but
thankful to have reached It at all, at
about eleven o'clock.
At this point many, indeed most
women, having had a tiring Journey,
would have gone to bed : but the fa
miliar Hampshire air and the knowl
edge that half an hour's walking would
take her to her beloved home acted on
Mrs. HIgnett like a restorative. One
glimpse of Wlndles she felt that she
must have before she retired for the
night If only to assure herself that It
was still there. She had a cup of cof
fee and a sandwich brought to her by
the night porter, whom she had roused
from sleep, for bedtime Is early In
Wlndlehurst and then Informed him
that she was going for a short walk
and would ring when she returned.
Her heart leaped Joyfully as she
turned In at the drive gates of her
home and felt the well-remembered
gravel crunching under her feet The
silhouette of the ruined castle against
the summer sky gave her the feeling
which all returning wanderers know.
And, when she stepped onto the lawn
and looked at the black bulk of the
house, Indistinct and shadowy with its
backing of trees, tears came into her
eyes. She experienced a rush of emo
tion which made her feel quite faint,
and which lasted until, on tiptoeing
nearer to the house in order to gloat
more adequately upon It, she per
ceived that the French windows of the
drawing room were , standing ajar.
Sam had left them like this In order to
facilitate deDarture. If a hurried de
parture should by any 1 mischance be
rendered necessary, and drawn cur
tains had kent the household from
noticing the fact
All the proprietor In Mrs. HIgnett
was roused. This, she felt Indignant
ly, was the sort of thing she had bees
afraid would happen the moment her
back waa turned. Evidently laxity-
one might almost say anarchy had
set In directly she had removed the
eye of authority. She marched to the
window and pushed It open. She had
now completely abandoned her kindly
scheme of refraining from rousing the
sleeping house and spending the night
at the inn; She stepped Into the draw.
Ing room with the single-minded pur-
I . -
pose of rousing Kustace out or nia
sleep and giving him a good talking; to
1 for having failed te maintain her own
standard 01 emciency among ui a-
mestlc staff. If there was one thing
on which Mrs. Horace HIgnett had al
waya Insisted It was that every win
dow In the house must be closed a
Ughts-out i
(TO BS CONTINUED.)
Sun's Rays Nearly Start Fire.
Just how simple matter It la fef
a combination of circumstances to pro
duce a fire was recently demonstrate.
in a striking manner, in an office build
lne at Corning, N. T. A flask that was
of water, The rays of the sun, com
ing through the window and falling oi
the flask, were concentrated In a spoil
about the size of a nickel, much as If
burning glass were being used. The n
suit was that the finish on the oak deal
was burned through to the wood. Th
possible results of this simple combe
nation of everyday clrcumstancea war
clearly revealed by the incident wbics
haDDened on a Saturday afternoc
when there was no one near the desr
It the concentrated rays bad fallen o
paper It would have been set on fire
St. Nicholas Magasine,
And it sometimes happens that tt.
things you did not say are more te
reams) than the rhusara M 1L4 av
I'
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After Every Meal
It's the longest-lasting
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and It's a help to dl
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ior me mouia
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Wrlgley meatus
benelltas weUa
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Not Interested
"When you found you hadn't your
fare did the conductor make you get
off' and walk?" asked the; inquisitive
man. -
"Only get off," was the sad reply.
"He didn't seem to care whether I
walked or sat down."
Eureka!
Barber "Your hair is starting to get
gray in -the back- nerer yueruious
Patron "That doesn't surprise me
lt's almost taken an eternity for you
to cut it I" St. Louis Times. .
; Spending all one's evenings at home
is praiseworthy, no doubt but the
oyster does it.
A safe and toothing
.remedy for cuts,
burns, or akin trou
ble. Protects, re- .
livesan(lheals.Tak -internally
for coughs
and sore throats.
Vaseline
sVtMMMIl
PETROLEUM JELLY
CheebthMfs-Co.,Cond.
Sou St. New York
v-eimer
Baby Chick Special, selected stock. Rhode
Island Reds, tl per 100; Whit Leghorns and
Anooaas, tie. mixed lota. 111. Order now.
Beech Haven Hatcheries, Washington,, Ga..
PATENTS
Send model or drawing for ex
ami nation. Highest references,
eared. Watson K. CnlMnaa
Best result.
l.. t-romptnass aa-
DDUM
Booklet FBBB. raatln,eae.,Waaiataa,A
YOUNG r.sAN
'et th Charlotte Barber Collecre teach you a good
rade and be independent. Write for catalogue,
karleit Barb Ci), Charlotte, N. C
V. M U CHARLOTTE, NO. 7-1924.
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8
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